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having an affair with a Polish man (but he has a wife and a child)


mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #1
hi i hate to admit it but i am seeing and having sex with a polish man who is living and working in uk at moment.. the problem is he has a wife and child in poland
telefonitika  
26 Jan 2007 /  #2
same story that most come up against mobile. Cant say i am in that position myself though i like a polish male but havent seen him since october last year and i never really found out what he actually thought of me :( managed to get two pictures of him which he himself allowed me to take at work, we'd talk and affectionately touch each other (like give each others hugs and tenderly place a hand on each others arm but alas nothing) :(

Did you want advice ? or other?
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #3
hi thanks its a bit deeper than that are you polish?
davidpeake  
26 Jan 2007 /  #4
are you pregnant from him mobile
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #5
no i am not that stupid..
telefonitika  
26 Jan 2007 /  #7
hi thanks its a bit deeper than that are you polish?

Im english mobile ... learning the language .... moving there in 2008 :)

no i am not that stupid..

Dont think davidpeake meant any offense hun :)

How deep is it if you dont mind me asking?
davidpeake  
26 Jan 2007 /  #8
was not even thinking of being offensive, but deeper than having an affair is either love or ?
LoneStranger  
26 Jan 2007 /  #9
The world has enough to provide for every human's needs...but not enough to provide for their greed.
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #10
ok sorry i didnt take offence, love i dont know maybe its a bit difficult ashes married he does say maybe in the future he will divorce but not yet as he has teenage daughter and doesnt want to hurt her.. i understand this.. he has been married 13 yrs and im the first person hes slept with since his marrage. i do belive him i can see it in his eyes, but who knows. men move in strange ways!!!!

lonestranger maybe thats why your alone!!!
LoneStranger  
26 Jan 2007 /  #11
maybe thats why your alone

how can you make a comment like that?... I recommend you ask yourself 'Why you made a comment like that?'...without knowing the life and achievements of the person you are making this comment about.

Was my line so much offending? So much false you found in it?... or was it like a blazing flame filled with the worlds most greatest reality.

Whatever it was, it was not meant to burn anyone....but just share the light of my opinion....which you can fully disagree with.... but, ur comment was rather intruiging to me...

Best wishes ...:)...
forgetmenots  
26 Jan 2007 /  #12
I think you burnt yourself LoneStranger ...Obviously the subject touched your spot of bother ...
I will keep myself in silence otherwise someone will get more offended.
What it would be like if people would take the resposibility of their own acts instead of finding the most sophisticated excuses...
Dont you think that the all situation above looks like waiting in a line for someone's tour ...

Im sorry of not being politically correct.
miranda  
26 Jan 2007 /  #13
I think you need a reality check here.
most likely Mobile, he will go back home to his wife and you will remain in the UK with a broken heart and lonely.
Or, he will stay in the UK, will divorce his wife and feel guilty about it for the rest of his life.
Or, none of this will happen, I guess the time will tell:)

Both of you are not doing the righ thing and you are both parners in crime.
He is judgeling 2 women already, so are you willing to have a commited relationship with him in the future? Do you want to have a family and children in the future with him?

Or you just having fun.
Fun is good, but at one point we need to take time to think where it's going, what is our part in it, what do we want out of this and are we willing to make sacrifices.

I migh sound like a moral know it all, but life has it's requirements and it usually corrects itself in a long run.
Unless it's love.
All the best to you
FISZ  
26 Jan 2007 /  #14
i do belive him i can see it in his eyes, but who knows

And how do you know this? He is lying to his wife right? Don't get involved with someone elses marriage. Would you like to be in his wifes position?
lofty  
26 Jan 2007 /  #15
And how do you know this? He is lying to his wife right?

And those are the best words of wisdom mobile will get today :)
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #17
no i wouldnt like to be in his wifes position, but i wouldnt put myself in that position in the first place. he has been away from his wife forthe past two and a half years and been with me for only two months.who are we hurting? nobody!! if i was in happy relationship i woulnt be away for 2 years in the first place.. and besides he is a very good ****!!!
miranda  
26 Jan 2007 /  #18
if i was in happy relationship i woulnt be away for 2 years in the first place.. and besides he is a very good ****!!!

there might be other reasons why he is away, but you sound like you feel good in the relationship and he is a good****, so good for you.

I just don't understand why why created this tread, to let the hole world know that you are having a good ****? Thanks for the info.
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #19
do you know what i wish i hadent bothered!!!!
miranda  
26 Jan 2007 /  #20
yaaah....
FISZ  
26 Jan 2007 /  #21
who are we hurting? nobody!! if i was in happy relationship i woulnt be away for 2 years in the first place.. and besides he is a very good ****!!!

You may not be, but he's breaking his trust with his wife. Think about it, if he's doing this to his current wife, what makes you think that he won't do it to you?
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #22
i know him and i know me and he wouldnt have to do thatwith me
davidpeake  
26 Jan 2007 /  #23
how long have you know him mobile
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #24
about nine weeks
FISZ  
26 Jan 2007 /  #25
i know him

been with me for only two months

Hmmm... ok maybe you know him just a little..or have you known him prior to getting together?

lol...ok so you don't know him. Takes a bit longer than 2 mths to really know someone. In my opinion of course.
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #26
i met him at parents evening he is my sons teacher,we became friends and so on

i know what i need to know lol
Ranj  
26 Jan 2007 /  #27
i know him and i know me and he wouldnt have to do thatwith me

Do you know his wife? Nobody can be sure of what motivates a person to do such things. You may be very similar to his wife and that's why he chose you. Not to be the moral police, but I have come to find out in my years on this earth, what goes around comes around. Have you ever heard the term, once a cheater, always a cheater? Sounds to me like it's just good sex and if you are both fine with that, than more power to ya. As for his being in an unhappy relationship, how do you know that for sure. My guess is he's probably in UK to make money to support his family. I will give him the fact that at least he told you he was married. Some don't even do that. At least you had an option of deciding whether you would fall for a married man or not.
Huegel  
26 Jan 2007 /  #28
You post a message to us, in order to tell us that you're having an affair.
When you do it, you tell us you 'hate to admit it.'
That implies that there is something about the situation that you do not like, despite your protestations later on that, you're not hurting anybody, you're having fun and he's a 4 star.

Taking you at face value, all is well with your world. If so, then why are the wife and child a problem, as you suggested?

Those people, who i'm sure are lovely and lots of fun, are hundreds of miles away in Poland aren't they?
They know nothing about what fun their dad/husband is having, do they?
They don't know about you, do they? Leaving aside the fact that i'm sure, those same lovely people would probably be devastated if they knew, why are they the problem? They were in his life long before you were, but like you say, you've known him for two months, so i'm sure he'd never do that to you. :)

So, if the case is as stated; all is well and nobody who knows about what is going on is being hurt, then why are you still feeling bad and loathe to admit your indiscretions?

Have fun. :)
LoneStranger  
26 Jan 2007 /  #29
you burnt yourself

and how did i do it?...

the subject touched your spot of bother

i saw the subject...i am in a forum ...i like to post my opinions here....and so I did!... so why do you think it did something so big with me!... was my response so wrong?... read it again....AND I AM VERY FIRM IN MY OPINION.

Disturbed relationships like that are product of greed in my view (you can have a different view of it!... !!!)... and greed has nothing to do with love/kindness or anything pure or creative.
OP mobile  
26 Jan 2007 /  #30
greed on whos part? i am doing nothing wrong like my polish lover says how were we to know we were gonna meet each other and have feelings.. these things happen we are all free people.. marriedor not married it really makes no difference!!! if i put he has a girlfriend but he isnt married would it really make adifference? and no i dont know his wife but have seen picture and no we dont look anything alike.

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