having an affair with a Polish man (but he has a wife and a child)

ABSOLUTELY CORRECT!


The both of you are.

I use to have friends who did this. I've see the turmoil it causes first hand....

Hmm. So then, he'll just keep cheating on his wife until he finds someone worth leaving her for? What a man! Ha. It's surprising he's able to perform in bed at all. No backbone. No balls. No fun. Better run...

your right might just do that!!!

You Jezebel !! :)

so what happened in the end?


oh its such a hard life!!

All of them told the girls whatever they had to in order to give it to them the way their wives wouldn't. One guy told his girl that he loved her , was leaving his wife, and planned to move in with her. All of them had no intentions of leaving their wives and dumped their girlfriends when things go too complicated.

As far as my first hand experience goes, I filed for divorce against my cheaing wife. She thought things were greener on the other side. The catch is that her boy never planned on leaving his wife. In fact when I spoke to his wife, she thought their relationship was as good as it got and never thought it could happen to her. 4 broken hearts, 2 families now divorcing, and 2 kids that will now have to grow up splitting time between parents.

My life is almost ready to be back on track with a lot to look foward to. I couldn't have written it any better :)

You know what you're doing is wrong. If you didn't, you wouldn't have posted your circumstances here. If the man really wants you, tell him to get lost and come back when he has his divorce papers. I will think twice before I marry again. I would like another child and for my daughter a sibling, but not right now... I'd date someone for at least a year before taking a relationship further. She'd also have to understand that my daughter comes before her...unless we had children. Then the kids come before her.

you know what i think your right im gonna say that to him today and see how it goes or probably doesnt go.. thankyou

Mobile sorry to tell you but nothing will come out of it...nothing at least for you...he is using you for fun ( i guess that is ok since you have fun too). He will not divorce his wife. He came to UK to make money. Dream on ...

maybe maybe not.. yes he is here to make money and what are you saying he cant fall in love with an english woman? like this kinda thing has never happened before!!!

Mobile, I am sorry, but I have to admit that hate women like you.

Do you pay bills for this guy or sometimes help him financially ?
And can he speak English, at least?
You know now, what he's going to tell his wife to explain himself...

Can't you find somebody single, even divorced, whatever? You have never met his wife and kid and you don't know what the real situation is.

seldom polish men settle with a foreign women...Yes, I do mean that... in a way ... you are being used...

Maati she is gona get what she deserves... I am certain

dont be srry u can hate me as much as u like!!No i do pay anythig i wouldnt do that. yes he can speak perfect english he i a teacher at local school (maths and pe this is where i met him). no i dont know what he is gonna tell his wife to explain himself. he is more concerned about telling his teenage daughter. its easy to say meet someone else but hard to do now we have feelings for each other


and what do i deserve? i am not a bad person i just got into a bad situation


well i dont know where you have been i know loads

It's almost obvious here that this woman is being used. The most probably it's about survival to that Polish guy. He's having fun as well, if the woman is as attractive as his wife or Polish chicks. If not, he prostitutes himself for help, money, support. He will not divorce his wife, regerdless of what he's saying...

You put yourself in this situation therefore you are the guilty one...even more guilty than he is...he is lonely, in a foreign country, missing his family...he closes eyes and is with his wife really not with you. Many polish men have to work abroad and they come back to Poland after years of separation. Don't get fooled by his words he is saying that only to keep you ...I don't blame him it is very hard to be among strangers alone...I rather blame you for it is easier for you to make the right decision but you are having too much fun ...:))

what is the point of me even saying anything you seem to know it all and u have never even met any of us

I don't agree with this, Maati. She's using him as much as he's using her (great sex). I think it's time to put an end to the Mobile bashing.


I don't think you are a bad person----like you said, you got yourself into a bad situation and only you can get yourself out of it, if that's what you choose to do.

That's what he told you...

It doesn't mean anything , if he's a math teacher there. He could be even university professor. In Poland they earn less than plumbers. I hope he told you that too. It is still about survival to him, since teachers in the UK don't make big money aw well.

I am a teacher myself. Fortunately, I teach in a private school in Warsaw plus I do other things apart from teaching.
Some of my friends are teachers and teachers assistants in the UK. Obviously, it is a better job than cleaning but still, nothing special financialy.

Hey Kuk, it takes 2 to tango---he's a grown man and if he had any sense of integrity, it wouldn't matter how lonely he got.

I see you don't want to understand ... so why are asking for opinions? You made your mind already...you want him ...regardless. It is not going to happen. Prove it to yourself observe him...how often he talks to his family, does he call, write letters, support them financially? I bet the answer is YES ... of course that is why he is there not to split ... he decided to work abroad for them...it was hard decision based on his love for them ... you are only a helper in his hardship. When he was talking about divorce didn't you pressure him for some asurance?

Because I live in Poland and I heard thousands stories like yours...
Math teacher, plumber, whoever...
I wish both of you good luck. You'll need it...

thankyou, but i really dont mind i can see why they hate me!!! i spoke to him earlier today and he isnt some young stupid child who is using me i can assure you all of this.. he didnt want to fall for me or hurt anyone but this has happened. do u really think i should finish with him? he says he cant consentrate, get me out of his head he even asked if i would tell him what time i would be in the supermarket just so he could see me.. does this sound like a man who is just using me for sex? we dont have sex everytime we mee alot of the time we just talk


he isnt just a teacher and as u asked i told you


you talk like this never has happened before, yes i hope he does send money to support his family what kind of man would he be if he didnt. we have only known each other 9 weeks its not gonna suddenly all stop


no its too soon i want him t make tha decision not me

I told you he can be even university professor with 5 degrees from Harvard University.
It does not matter, as long as he's a Polish citizen working in your country...
What he's telling you, it's typical, kind of romantic, women always fell for that...and Polish guys can be very, very romantic, but it does not mean anything. Did you hear about Slavic romantic soul?

i think we are wasting our time everyone seems to have made there mind up. he isnt lonely he has many friends


everybody is different maybe we are meant to be

They're adults and have their own minds, he's the guilty one, she's not in a relationship and if he is a P.E. / maths teacher he is earning circa. 30k so I dont think he needs any financial help either, matti, if he's been away from Poland for 2.5 years then what does that say for his marriage, you also make out that this guy is using her, why does that have to be the case, can it not just be he is in love with her or is that hard for you to understand....as for Polish guys not getting in to relationships with other women other than Polish women this is rubbish, what about the Polish women in relationships with other men.....just like yourself!

Friends don't give him sex and "feminine" emotional support. It's obvious...

yes but its not all about sex we do really like each other if it was just sex then i wouldnt bother


i couldnt have put it better myself

it is not about not having friends but missing closeness of another person hugs, kisses, warmth..you will give it to him for a little while...

I have my moments :)

Besides I dont think all this bashing is right, they are judging you, what about him???

As for all this he is using you rubbish, it sounds like he is very smitten and only time will tell what the outcome will be...good luck

so u also think its not possible for us to actually fall in love

BTW, maybe his wife is up to the same thing back in Poland, you know all those hugs and kisses and warmth you cant get of your friends!