UK, Ireland /
From Hertfordshire, UK to Śląskie, Poland - Are we crazy? [35]
Hi Mac, I'll call you that for short if you don't mind :) I'm Irish, married to a Polish man and I've lived in Warsaw for over six years now so here's my bit of perspective for what it's worth. Being Irish, I tend to be a bit long winded so to avoid waffling I'll try to answer your points in a concise manner!
Regarding your reasons for moving, I would be cautious about two things. The slower pace of life is a dream for many but it's hard to achieve even in Poland. As for better and safer environment for your children, in what way better and safer? The education system in Poland is no great shakes, the air is the most toxic in the EU and the roads are the most dangerous. And your kids' future will be in the hands of political parties like PIS which doesn't bode too well. You have a border with Russia and Belarus and they're talking about building a wall to keep out refugees. Poland is very much a post-communist country and you'll become aware of that once you live in it. This is what's going on at the border at the moment:
dw.com/en/medics-leave-poland-belarus-border-without-reaching-migrants/a-60353514
As to your concerns:
Kids and the language in school. I was a primary school teacher in Ireland and taught many foreign kids. Don't worry. The boys will adapt. Academically they may struggle a bit for the first year but socially they should be fine. Kids tend to use play to communicate with each other and they can socialize with less need of language, especially boys :) However, the education system from what I've seen of it is a bit chalk and talk and doesn't encourage much in the way of developing thinking skills. The old education system was reformed by PO and the standards had risen considerably but PIS changed it back to the previous system.
Strain on your relationship - absolutely, there will be and not just on your relationship with your wife but it will undermine your relationship with your children too.
Moving in with mother-in-law .......................do you really need me to commnent?? The dynamic of your family will change utterly if you are living away from home at least half the time and the rest of it is spent in your mother-in-law's house and it won't be a short-term arrangement either. You're looking at a couple of years.
Citizenship for you - why would you want it?? You're Irish, you're an EU citizen, you don't need it. There would be no difficulties though if you wanted it as long as you pass the language requirement.
Taxation rules - what's your specific concern?
Your own concerns:
Your rights - oh Lord! that's a tough one. It's completely different to the UK and Ireland. It would take a whole thread in itself to discuss but basically it's heavily geared towards the mother of the kids and it can be very hard to enforce your visitation rights and child support can be any figure they pluck out of the air. They don't base it on your income and outgoings but on your potential earnings. If you admit fault in a divorce you're obliged to support your wife financially for the rest of her life unless she remarries.
Language - it's difficult. You won't learn it quickly and you'll have to be very consistent with keeping up the studying. It takes a lot of work but it's possible. It's quite possible to learn enough to cope with everyday life but your grammar will never be perfect. People won't mind though and they'll understand you anyway. However if you want to go for citizenship you'll have to work at the grammar if you want to pass the language exam.
Will you be accepted - yes, you will. The fact that you have 'Polish' children will be a help but speaking the language is key. If you speak the language people will accept you. but you must understand Mac, that the mindset in rural Poland is so different to the UK or rural Ireland :) your outlook and attitudes will be so different that you may find it hard to fit in. People in modern rural Ireland are fairly open minded, tolerant and are quite well informed. The Irish have always been an outward looking people despite being an island nation. Poles are quite insular and in rural areas they are pretty conservative compared to Ireland. So you may find that you don't have much in common with your neighbours and you might feel a bit isolated and lonely.
Will you be able to work in Poland - it depends on what your job is. You say 'business director' ; that's a bit vague. What area of business? To be honest without fluent Polish your options are limited unless it's a foreign company that specifically wants an English speaking manager who doesn't need to know Polish. And yes, Polish work culture is pretty different to the UK.
My Wife won't be happy in Ireland
Why not?
To conclude I'll just say that there are plenty of Irish and English people who've moved to Poland and seem to be happy here and maybe you'll be one of them, but don't underestimate how difficult it is to adapt. Like many places, Poland is great for a holiday, but living here is a totally different kettle of fish and you're wise to have concerns. Go néirigh an t-ádh leat :))
Here's a couple of articles that you should read if you can find time. It's your future and your childrens' after all and you should go into it with your eyes open.
balkaninsight.com/2021/06/10/polish-ruling-partys-education-reforms-god-country/
polkong.com/driving-in-poland-surviving-on-europes-most-dangerous-roads/
notesfrompoland.com/2020/11/25/poland-has-eus-worst-air-pollution-shows-new-report/
notesfrompoland.com/2021/03/11/poland-is-worlds-most-autocratizing-country-finds-democracy-index/