Poetess hasn't been used much for over a century and both actress and waitress are old-fashioned
I can't remember the last time I heard 'poetess' used unironically.
Increasingly, 'actress' is only used in relation to awards like the Oscars and sentences like "she's a committed actor" are commonplace.
Waitress and waiter are largely supplanted by 'server' in the US (I think) and now 'waitress' has class connotations (lower working class).
It's weird to want to restrict the meaning of Pole to men at a time when sex marking is generally becoming less used in English....
unrelated (and a question for Atch): Trying to find usages of Poless on the internet, one site claims 'poless' is Dublin slang for 'police'....