Off-Topic / What's your connection with Poland? Penpals. [595]

No, it is not. But if you add that he never lived abroad , doesn't seem to even go on holiday to different countries etc. It may give him very closed perspective.

And knowing foreign languageswas always a big part of being properly educated in Poland.

Off-Topic / What's your connection with Poland? Penpals. [595]

@Iron
Even if we accept your statement as correct it still makes them bilingual. Kaczyński is not.

History / Enemies, Strangers, Friends. Poles and Germans. [82]


Could you show some data?

Because that 92% was in a research from 2022...

Life / Why do Poles talk so badly about Poland? [25]


Same here.

Law / Can a tenant change locks to house without giving access to the landlord [37]


And instead want to pay ridiculous amount of money to rent the same thing from a private owner with no security?

Law / Can a tenant change locks to house without giving access to the landlord [37]


No, I would argue the same points in Poland. But you see the British perspective and that's why we are here.

Law / Can a tenant change locks to house without giving access to the landlord [37]

Oh my, what a nice picture of cultural misunderstanding.

So Jon, Paulina doesn't understand what you are saying because the market is so differentin Poland.

@Paulina- private renting market has quite significant drawbacks.

Pumping the prices, insecurity for families etc.

In UK unless at some point you get something from the council/housing association you have 2 choices: buy or have a private landlord.

Private landlords e.g. kick their tenants out if the rent in the area rises a lot ( like now) and look for new one so they can have the higher rent.

Family may be renting property for over 10 years and yet get 2 months to move out.
If you split with your partner many agencies ask you to reapply for the property and you may not get it if they think your financial status is at risk.

Life / Do colored immigrants in Poland function better than in Western countries? [291]


Same here.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


That is funny as I'm yet to meet a guy that would live his long term partner because the relationship doesn't and not because they have someone on the side.

And it's not the point in this case anyway.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


But that lack of love has a lot of influence on other things. Including the kids. Parents for example treat a kid inappropriately. Making them their 'buddy' against the other parent, or a semi-partner.

And then at what stage can parents brake up? What is the age?

I heard about quite a few instances when it was the growing up kids that told their parents to let it go finally e.g. know a guy who told his mother she should divorce when he was 14 (non abusive, not ill etc)

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


There is also emotionally, financially...


Want to is one thing. Getting destroyed by it is another. Especially since more and more parents see the importance of making the process as peaceful as possible. And since more fathers keep significant role in their kids life.


But mommy that is not feeling depressed, that has the energy and willingness to play and do staff will do.

When my nice split up with her ex if was actually her friends that saw her after a long time said:

- Wow, you look so happy and you are smiling so much.

And recently she noticed that since the break up she doesn't seem to get angry.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


The guy himself is saying she is planning to go full time work so she can support herself. Every women I know that split with their partner is supporting herself independently. The only one I know that tried to get the alimony is where the guy cheated and left her.

I'm not gaslighting, I'm disagreeing with you.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


Or observations and comments coming from the kids themselves (when they grow up).


It seems she is already prepared to pay for herself- once they split she will pay her way. So what's next?

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


Parents braking up is hard on kids but there is plenty that are not destroyed.
She will still look after her kid, the father seems a good guy that will be there for his son as well..


And what could he do to 'not to put up with that crap'?

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


Maybe. But that is big assumption.
Even in that case things remain- she is unhappy know and doesn't love the guy.
Would you want to stay with a women that is unhappy with you and said she doesn't love you?

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]

That is not an excuse, that is explaining why she feels the way she is feeling.


For one she might not be looking.
Second, we don't know what catch she is capable of and what she might consider better.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


What excuses.


Being in an unhappy relationship is not a whim in my opinion.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


I'm not making excuses. I'm saying what I think about the situation and her motivation.


What do you mean by that?

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


Considering they spend 10 years together it doesn'tseem to be the case.
While obviously it would have been better if they managed to love and support each other for the rest of their lives it doesn't always work that way.

If my partner stopped loving and caring for me I would rather move on then spend my years in a lie.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


What the hell?

People have the right to decide the relationship doesn't work. No matter if your partner is decent or not. Especially when you were 19 when it all started!

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]

To me it all sounds straightforward if very painful to you.

You had a kid when she was very young and before you two had the chance to decide whether you actually want to go that way. As you did you went straight to family like.

Now the kid is getting bigger and she has time to think. She is still young. She is doing work and school, meeting new people, having a view of a different life and sees that she is not happy with what she has.

Of course there is the option that she is cheating or using you but it seems to me that your life together burned out. Considering her age when it started, her age now, kids age and how long the relationship lasted it is my bet that she just want to end it. I'm really sorry for you but I don'tthink there is anything you can do. Focus on yourself and the kid.


That he should try harder, or be more of a partner, or pay attention to her...There is plenty to choose from. Not saying that it's necessarily a case here.


After 10 years of relationshipshe may as well not want to go to dating.

Love / Relationship Issues with my polish girlfriend advice needed [76]


I know quite a few that did just that. My niece couldn't be happier after she finished her relationship.


And how is he going to do that?

While I agree new guy is a danger you can't reasonably stop her from forming new relationship.

If it's true that she just has enough of the relationship then neither fighting for it nor being 'tough' will not work.

If it's her way of trying to wake him up to something then that will kill it off.

OP- you sound decent so I'm sorry about your relationship. The only thing that will work is talking with her.

Off-Topic / Things We Love [330]

Talking to kids. Really like the way they see the world.

Off-Topic / Things you can't get used to in your new country [95]


Buy unsalted one :) I just don't see a point. If I want butter with salt I can sprinkle it on top. Thankfully all the supermarket sell unsalted versions now.


Suròwka from kapusta kiszona is to die for with fried fish!


Question I have here : does Atch mean fish on Christmas day or Christmas Eve?

Off-Topic / Things you can't get used to in your new country [95]


Cam you explain a bit more?

I know- national speed limit when it's obvious driving more than 40 will end with head on collision

Off-Topic / Things We Love [330]


Of course but in autumn/winter it gets elevated to another level!


I think I hate folding the most and sorting. Ironing with a nice music or nice show and I can crack on. And it makes me feel like an adult :)

Off-Topic / Things you can't get used to in your new country [95]


You....you...BLASPHEMER!!!!!!

Off-Topic / Things We Love [330]

Yupee! Another great thread. Thanks Atch.

Nice Earl Grey with lemon on a autumn/ winter afternoon

Off-Topic / Things you can't get used to in your new country [95]


I know but I wanted to make sure to distinguish them from actual boxes.

I hate that they let cold air in. Especially if someone doesn't push things all the way through, that your mail lands on the floor of your main entrance and makes it hard to come in and I hate that strangers can throw stuff into your house just like that.

Off-Topic / Things you can't get used to in your new country [95]


And yet it is permitted. So obviously it was decided that the risk is worth it.

But hey ho, my little annoyance with it will stay just that. It's not like it's going to change just because I hate it.

I have new thing: letter slots in door. I don't want to think how annoyed post people are with those new door with letter slots at the bottom....