Are Polish mothers-in-law monsters?

Spot on, I've had my share of observations not entirely dissimilar to yours.

Du er sgu god til at taste;) Helt enig i dine iagtagelser vedroerende menatlitets- og kulturforskelle mellem Polen og Skandinavien.

[Moved from]: How are the Polish in laws with non EU nationals?

How are the polish in laws with non Eu nationals? Are they good or horrible like mine? Share experience

Mine is a class A Biatch

interfering old snatch she seems to think that although i have worked in childcare and as a midwife before moving to poland that she knows whats best for my child even though she never raised my husband as she was working and then getting drunk

In my experience the English one was the quiet assassin. Devious to the core. The Polish one prefers the direct approach. Shouting and throwing things. Bloody scary. The father in law is a brave and tolerant man. Just hoping the other half got his genes.

Ugh..My mom is a pain but different way..uber dependent . Not resentful or disapproving though.
But my fiancé's mother is going to be a pain for some years to come.

I am still trying to defuse it best as possible. Hunny is already the "lucky winna" of being oldest and only male whom his parent spin all their projected lost dreams on . She is somewhat neurotic..in a for real way. Been 'delicate' for some years.

To make it tougher, she does have valid concerns; even if they do not apply. But a terrible way of approaching it! She has made him quite angry and he is vowing never to speak to them again if it is that way when he comes to States for good next year (may com sooner than planned for other things).

I have been liked and admired by most of my exes parents. Though my Russian MIL and me had a rocky start first 2 years of the 15 years I knew her (she ended up the ONLY person in that family I came away liking barring my own children of course).

But some circumstance make this hard...specially when they are type of parent where everything their child does is are reflection on them..

So he had went from possibly to certainty in plan to marry a American-Divorcee (I can remarry in the Church)- with handicapped child-who is Older. What is wrong with him ..what has she done wrong! LOL

If I was catty I could give her the answer... not quite fair but true. LOL.
Oh ..dunno..maybe it all came to this because long ago you was lazy mum who slept in til noon (she blames her mom for not coming by as she was wont to..lol) so your hungry 2 yr old became a statistic when he ate some raw eggs? He almost died, stunted his growth and has asthma and compromised immune system?

then after you had your 'nervous breakdown 'you had your next child watched by him as soon as they were walking...and the next. So he has been the secondary caregiver of his siblings since age 7 til adulthood? (dad works far afield often ).

So he didn't identify with his peers? At home you are CLOSE to him but also say things about the relationship dynamics that destabilize his comfort in home?

Your potshots about what was wrong with him at family parties stuck in their eyes for his life? the family infighting crushes his sensitive soul and he cant fit in at parties since he does not and cannot drink... period...ever? Yet is expected to at EVERY gathering? and gets heckled for refusal?

Why ..I can't Iiiii_MA_GIIINE Why he may not fit the cookie cutter perfect-son-of-good family shape.....

She loves him..to DEATH. She is blinded to what a great guy he has turned out to be in his own right without fitting in certain ideals.

I'd never be so cruel as to rub the previous statement in her face.. but I think it every time he is distressed because she is making major scene, using every tool of emotional blackmail and even threatening to "have a relapse" so to speak. While he was away from home more than a week first time ever the 9 yr old freaked and was overheard by teacher talking about suicide preferable to living another week at home 0_) ( that caused some embarrassment and a stir to be sure)

And this person will be my MIL in no less than 320 days... I am kinda glad I don't speak polish.

The BEST things she has said so far...lol.. is that I am probably got something wrong and must be somewhat childish to have any interests with him.

Okay ..lol .. I can wear that coat. Though I raise my kids, pay my bills, never got fired, only quit one job ever. I'm not in debt. How much more "grown up " do I need to be >_<

Other speculation has brought flat out weird illogical theories.

Though Old World families expect more of sons...I don't think it is so much a Polish thing as a Mum in law thing

My God, you've been trained well.

mine is good to me actually. generous, and accommodating. It depends on the in laws. Some other may not be very open to their children marrying non-Pole. Surprisingly, i'm not Pole myself and I'm not English. And my in laws like me, even my little in law nieces, though they can be a bit shy sometimes.

@ukpolska
Seriously! My mil comes from a very polish American culture and she did the same thing and actually threw a picture of another woman in our dryer but it was just my clothes in it. Then pretended like she didn't know where the laundry room even was in our tiny house. She thinks she can do whatever she wants. She does disrespectful things all of the time. I suspect she's been trying to get rid of me from day one because she can't get everything she wants out of her son with me "in the way." I know her mother gave her whatever she wanted growing up.

Yes, some mothers in law never read the Bible which says these holy words:
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."

Polish is mostly Catholic so what do you expect about them reading the bible?
It's not easy to be excepted into Polish families by nasty mothers because they don't like any kind of change to their traditions.

@Curly1
It's very simple, ask the local priest about it. Then tell her: but the local priest said: "insert quoted content", then she will say her thing, and then you say: do you know the bible better then a priest? Why can't we go ask him if you are correct

Most likely there will be some bewildered confusion, some cup of tea or "better not ask him too much about it"

Some mother in law have no interest in reading the Bible :)

@Lenka
A fountain of knowledge! Poor soul

Just reminding that assuming in any way that the mil is Catholoc is...silly. Not to mention Catolics from my experience are not that big on reading bible.

We just need to keep salting her oats.


Because the priests back in the day didn't want their flock to be educated on the Bible so they could have complete control over their flock.

In fact it was considered a sin to question a priest that for some odd reason they called "father" that I have never figured out to this day.

The priest was/is no father to anyone.
There is only God the Father to us.

@johnny reb
It's fairly well explained on the internet, if I am not mistaken. Jesus said to be like shephards for the sheep?

Yes, "Come follow Me and I will make you fishers of men".


Sheperd's or teachers of men, not fathers.
My gosh, you will be having Pawian demanding that we call him father.
Polish mother in laws that don't know the word rely on many superstitions to maneuver in their favor thru life with.
Some of those superstitions are nothing short of satanic making them monsters to deal with..

Yes, they are monsters, monsters you have to love.

Yes, coz verily I say unto you, the Child is Father of the Man. Ha!