Now that I have checked the other thread [thanks, AVJoeUK] I can see what is going on.
In simple terms: Get as far away from this relationship as possible. This guy is fcuking with your mind and will do worse to your body.
i want better, its just i dont see better, and i know this sounds really weak and pathetic, but im scared of being single again.
This is where he has control. You are losing all self respect.
Snap out of it NOW. Stop thinking about him and concentrate on yourself. Don't even bother talking about him to friends.
And make sure you get yourself into the right frame of mind for when you next see him, if only to tell him to get the fcuk out of your life, forever.