Smitten and Wondering

I admit mine to be forgiven, to get the burden off my shoulders and learn from my mistakes so I can grow and mature into a better person.

As in this case, the immature self-centered Don Juan has never grown up and is still thinking with his little head instead of his big head.


Why ? are you feeling guilt from taking the vow to your Maker and wife of, "Until Death Do Us Part ?"
I assure you that He will remind you of this come Judgement Day.
Mama boys like you are what justifiably turns good women into Karens.

Firstly, you're being a hypocrite right now, because you're often getting very emotional when commenting stuff on this forum.
Secondly, I'm not getting more emotionally involved than I usually do - I'm simply speaking my mind.


No, I've never been cheated on as far as I know. How about you? And have you ever cheated on your girlfriend or wife? Or have you ever felt like cheating?


Really? Would you say the same thing if the OP was a woman wanting to cheat on her husband? :)

Exactly. In 98% of Iron`s posts to me he is overreacting and losing control of his emotions.
PS. Present Continuous tense which I just used suggests irritation. Ha!

Then find a deserted place, yell out to your hearts content what you feel, what you think about it and ask God «Why?!» Then I would suggest doing something monotonous, have phone on airmode and see if you can fall asleep and become more calm

Entertaining such a thought is already a sin.
The OP is only here to get support to justify his sin.
Satan must be dancing in his glory as I smell sulfur.

news-medical.net/news/20190612/Women-have-better-memories-of-events-than-men.aspx


Based on numerous accounts of many wives - men are apparently incapable of finding ketchup in the fridge, etc., so our "super" memory skills can be useful :):



"Witch!"

Haha :D

Well, I have never cheated on you while we were dating.


Not really, it is rather my temper.


it is not the same, a dude can cheat and recover without losing anything - most of the time, for a woman it is a different story. Given their predispositions, I wouldn't recommend cheating for women for their well-being.

Ah, yes, you're a hypocrite, I knew that already.


Besides his wife, kids, house and part of his income (US version), haha lol

You can admit to yourself and God. You don't have to tell anyone.


Women get pregnant.
Lately, even men can.

Look at the bullets on her !


I have a very good female friend that showed her cheating husband one of those rubber grip jar openers that you put over the lid for a better grip.

She looked at him and said, "I have one of these now so I don't need you anymore."


You don't know much about forgiveness do you. (sad, very sad)

Not I'm not!
I'm saying that having science behind me you are just saying your part having ideology on your side and silly notion that equality means the same.

You couldn't be more wrong. Simple!

fix your drinking habit!

Women get pregnant.
Lately, even men can.


X forgiving me or me forgiving X? Who is the forgiver?

Yes, you are :)


I don't have a drinking habit :)))


There are condoms and birth control pills these days :))

Even if we assume that is right (which I think guys usually grossly overestimate to give themselves an excuse) that guy is not in a relationship with himself and it's not about if it will affect him but what it does to his relationship and to the women once she finds out.

If you guys are still carrying a garbage after 50 years it is quite obvious that neither of you know anything about forgiveness.
When was the last time you said, "I am sorry, I was wrong ?"
WHO ! Rich ! LOL

Exactly. If a guy is unable to be faithful to a woman, then he shouldn't be in a relationship that was agreed upon to be monogamous from the start.

If life was that logical we would not have a million abortions a year in the US.

@Novichok, if there a people who are too stupid and not responsible enough to use condoms and birth control pills, then such people probably shouldn't procreate (or at least until they get wiser).

Well, she could have a more relaxed attitude to the issue. We can assume that she is doing something wrong if he is looking at younger women with such longing.

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No, I'm not! You never listen properly and jump to easy conclusions. How about you deflate your ego a tad and learn something? Deal?

First of all, we see that situation from our perspective. We are living like fishes in Christian waters, one fish or another may have their ideas some flatly deny they have anything to do with Chirtanita but so far our country and our part of the world is steeped deeply in a lack of a better term a Christian civilization.

Such civilization has a moral code and views on what constitutes marriage and a family and the relationship between those individuals involved in that.
So from a point of view of moral or ethical (principles not motivated directly by religious beliefs) standards, he shouldn't cheat - he is the bad end of the story, by the same token that would be equally bad if he was she i.e. the same standard apply for a woman.

We could just leave it at that and forget about OPpost which is more likely a hoax.
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However, if we detach our moral or ethical principles from the situation there is quite another story.
First of all psycho-physical disposition of both genders. It is known to science that men can have multiple partners and it doesn't affect them at all. what's more in Asian countries wife has a social place and most of the resources at her disposal but does not care that much if her husband has some random sexual encounters outside the marital bond.

On the other hand, women can't help it but after say few partners they are broken and are unable to form a long-term bond with one man.

Therefore women cheating and men cheating are not the same - simple.
Hence I'm not a hypocrite and feminist by attacking Christian religion and its moral code is akin to shooting themselves in the foot. In short, they are stupid!

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It figures, you still do not know!

To the issue of cheating? :D Sure, maybe husbands should have a more relaxed attitude to their wives cheating too :D And aunts should grow moustache :D Very "realistic" approach on your part :D




Yes, you are.


Not only from the moral and ethical point of view, but also from the point of view of human relations and their feelings for each other. This is something you seem to be missing here.

As for viewing it from the Christian point of view - I can't really agree here. Monogamous relationships aren't characteristic only for Christian and post-Christian countries. Polygamy is actually rare in the world:

pewresearch.org/short-reads/2020/12/07/polygamy-is-rare-around-the-world-and-mostly-confined-to-a-few-regions/

And if it's rare it must mean there was a reason why human relationships evolved in this way.


I don't know if the wife really doesn't care, or simply she can't do much about it. But since Scorpio411 doesn't live in Asia, I don't give a f*ck what it's like in Asia. He's clearly Christian, I'm guessing that his wife is too. It's pretty likely that they had a church wedding and that means he made an oath before God. So, he's very much living in that "Christian bubble". If he doesn't like it, then he can divorce his wife, take that Polish girl to Asia (if she's going to be interested) and cheat on that Polish girl in Asia all he wants lol

You sound very rattled. If you wanted to rand with the full force of your feminist BS you should have done it all along not pretending that you like to discuss issues. You just want to have your say, I hear you, and kick it to the curb with ease as emotional feminist BS and women's yapp that does not have much meaning or rhythm.

Nonsense. It's enough for a man to get bored after years of being married to the same woman. It's enough that the wife gets older, he doesn't find her attractive anymore and that's why he got attracted to a younger woman.

Also, Scorpio411 wrote that it's not his wife's fault. Even if we assume he's wrong and that there's something that his wife could do to make their marriage better, then the first thing he should do is to try and work on his marriage and if that fails - get a divorce and only then start chasing "young skirts".


This is simply not true :D


It is exactly the same.

Bullsh1t. Stop with this demagogic evasion :) I presented you with some facts and logical arguments. Do you have any counterarguments?
Because it looks like you don't have any and that's why you're starting spouting your usual nonsense :))

point them out, there is no any.


so what? That is what men oft say as opposed to women who always blame men.


Oh really, is that your experience talking? lol! I'm talking about scientific data here ..not hearsay or female wonderland.


anybody is attracted to young women, so what? That is an evolutionary biological factor. Don't bring up it in an accusatory fashion...

By the way - why would men have to work on their marriage? If something is amiss is it not that women's fault as they are lacking as wives?

Of course there are. My post #50 is full of them. Read it again.


Bullsh1t.


What scientific data? I am not aware of any scientific data showing that women get "broken" after having a few partners and are "unable to form a long-term bond with one man".


You were the one who started automatically to blame the wife and that's why I pointed out that "evolutionary biological factor" to you.

If you mean Scorpio411's case then by "working on his marriage" I meant that he should tell his wife that he's missing something in their marriage. Tell her what that it is, what could be improved, etc. And if he doesn't know what is that he's missing exactly or doesn't know how to tell this to his wife or how this should be fixed, then maybe they should try marriage counselling.

lol! I see that working out for him just splendidly! You have that theoretical knowledge about long-term relationships don't you? lol!
Girl, 9 out of 10 women would read it as - I don't love you anymore! Alternatively, the response would have been - I'm not entirely happy with you too - here is a list of 100 BS issues.

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Now we are talking. You are ignorant of science. I get it.
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I still can't find them, could you do me a solid and point them out for me one by one?

And the alternative is to keep lying to your partner and hoping to be able to cheat on her. Great perspective!


Then please educate us and show us those studies

Now you have an inkling what ios like for a man to deal with a wife, it is a hard job and it shouldn't have been. lol!

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I told you and others on PF many times that I don't make stuff up and I don't lie when it comes to data. Those studies are out there and if you are interested you can find them. I'm not here to provide you with sources or quotes or whatnot. Dealing with Harry cured me of such a notion for good.

If you want you can educate yourself after all you can read. Simple.

Well, I'd say that trying to fix your marriage is a better option than destroying it completely by cheating on your spouse - at least for normal people o_O


Iron, the fact that you were or are not able to talk about problems in your marriage and find solutions to those problems doesn't mean that everyone is like this. You're projecting too much. There are better, more mature and more intelligent people in this world than you - both men and women. I'm not saying that this is easy, but it can be done.


Nonsense. Adult people usually know enough about life to realise that after some years of marriage a crisis may come, etc. Many women would prefer to know what's wrong rather than to be cheated on and find out at some point that their husband has been having an affair for the last 5 years or is f*cking prostitutes on regular basis o_O

From a woman's perspective - the fact that a guy is willing to fight for his marriage shows that he cares. That he wants to be with his wife in a real (and not fake) relationship. That maybe he still loves her.