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I am going to poland to meet my boyfriend's family and friends and need some advice


latingirl 1 | -
31 Jul 2023 #1
I am a girl from Latin America and my boyfriend is Polish. I am 25 and will travel soon to meet his family and friends. I would like to know what is the best way to approach his family and friends. I don't know more than 3 words in Polish and can't communicate if they don't speak English. I tried to learn with Duolingo but is really hard. Also in my country we are very open people and friendly, it would be disrespectful if I suggest to go dancing with his friends? or how can I gain their approval?

Is it ok to greet his family and friends with a kiss on a cheek the first time? or is it weird?
What are akward questions they could ask me and what would be the best way to answer?

About his family he said he and his mother would like him to have children and marry but he said she can be a difficult person sometimes and I would like to show the best of me and also get their approval. He told me I am very beautiful and exotic and that many people will be impressed when see me in Poland but more than that I want his close people to trust and accept me. I read about Poland history, gastronomy (but I don't know how to make any Polish dish) and culture.

I am a bit afraid and would appreciate any advice taking into account the language barrier and cultural differences. Thanks!
johnny reb 49 | 7,302
31 Jul 2023 #2
I don't know more than 3 words in Polish and can't communicate if they don't speak English.

Latinos speak Spanish where I come from. (J.R. smells troll)
Spend $250 and get a voice language translator.
They fit in your pocket and when people speak to you in a foreign language it automatically translates it to English and when you respond to them it automatically translates it to their language.

You can even get an app on your cell phone to do this.

would be disrespectful if I suggest to go dancing with his friends?

Absolutely not, he would be proud to share his new trophy with his friends. (J.R. smells troll)

(but I don't know how to make any Polish dish) and culture.

Simple, buy a bag of sauerkraut and a ring of pre-cooked Polish sausage and put them in a pot and boil it for ten minutes.

Get creative and add some jalapeno's and refried beans and wrap that mixture in a burrito skin and call it a Polish burrito.
You'll be a sure hit with his family and friends especially if you are about six months along with a baby bump.
How and where did you meet if I may ask ?
Paulina 17 | 4,425
31 Jul 2023 #3
Is it ok to greet his family and friends with a kiss on a cheek the first time? or is it weird?

I'd say this is rather reserved for family and close friends, so I'd probably wait with that if I were you - Poland is not France :)) You could try to give his family members a hug though, I guess. In case of friends I'd just give them a handshake - I'd say this is a safe choice for a first meeting (unless they're huggy people, then they'll hug you first).

Poles are often pretty reserved people, we aren't very expressive, at least in comparison to Latin people, but they get warmer once they get to know you.

it would be disrespectful if I suggest to go dancing with his friends? or how can I gain their approval?

Your boyfriend is going to be your host, so it's on him to organise everything and make sure you'll have a good time with his friends, imho. Just talk to him about what you'd like to do.

I read about Poland history, gastronomy (but I don't know how to make any Polish dish) and culture.

That's nice, Poles like it when foreigners know something about their country or at least show interest - I'm sure you'll score points with that :)

As for his mother - a way to win her over could be eating whatever she gives you to eat and say how tasty everything is lol ;)

As for language barrier - just ask your boyfriend to translate for you and maybe you could use Google Translate or some app.

Don't worry, Poles know how difficult their language is ;D
pawian 223 | 24,567
31 Jul 2023 #4
Is it ok to greet his family and friends with a kiss on a cheek the first time?

It depends what kind of people you will be dealing with. You can kiss them if you see broad smiles, warm welcoming gestures and generally the atmosphere will be very friendly from a start. But most Poles aren`t so exuberant meeting strangers.
Cargo pants 3 | 1,500
31 Jul 2023 #5
When I met my wifes relatives first time years back I just shook everyones hand,of course females first,but again the OP is a woman.
johnny reb 49 | 7,302
31 Jul 2023 #6
but again the OP is a woman.

Yes, 25 years old and

I am very beautiful and exotic and that many people will be impressed when see me in Poland

Has anyone heard from the Russian ballet dancer lately ?

But most Poles aren`t so exuberant meeting strangers.

Better to put your innocent little shy girl look on and be humble to make points rather than telling them how beautiful and exotic you are.
AntV 5 | 652
31 Jul 2023 #7
@latingirl

Don't overcomplicate things. Just be yourself.

As far as the kiss on the cheek and all that: just follow the lead of whoever you are greeting. Poles are like everyone else, they are individuals with different personalities.

Poles are aware of how complicated their language is, if you only know "dzien dobry" they'll be charmed.

You'll find that a difficult Polish mother is a lot like a difficult Latina mother-only more reserved.
Lyzko 45 | 9,480
31 Jul 2023 #8
AntV's right about that.

Unlike certain Europeans, Poles do indeed realize that their language can often be a challenge, therefore, any valiant efforts to take a stab, even mere welcome phrases or the like, will be met with open arms!


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