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Date Guidelines Required


Huzaifa997  1 | 3
18 Mar 2024   #1
I need tips for dating a Polish girl with serious note, and I am from Asia.
Bobko  27 | 2070
18 Mar 2024   #2
It's the same as for an Asian girl, except the opposite.

Hope that helps.
OP Huzaifa997  1 | 3
18 Mar 2024   #3
I mean how to approach her ? What kind of questions I can face ?
Bobko  27 | 2070
18 Mar 2024   #4
I mean how to approach her

Slowly. Cautiously. Like a cheetah stalking an antelope.

What kind of questions I can face?

Man, I don't know wtf I'm doing writing to you. First I thought it was funny, now I feel like an idiot. You should stop being an idiot too - a Polish woman is still a woman.

A woman is a woman even on Mars.

There is more in common between a woman from Tanzania, and a woman from Poland - than there is between a man and a woman from Poland.
Novichok  5 | 8320
18 Mar 2024   #6
Ask her if she wants to have a drink with you. If she says yes, run.
The proper answer is: How about a walk, instead...
Bobko  27 | 2070
18 Mar 2024   #7
The proper answer is: How about a walk, instead...

If only I had your sage advice earlier, I could have saved myself a great deal of heartache.

Thank you

Please don't thank me.
Novichok  5 | 8320
18 Mar 2024   #8
If only I had your sage advice earlier,

I wish I had it, too...
Alien  25 | 6201
5 May 2024   #9
I am from Asia.

Where exactly?
Alien  25 | 6201
5 May 2024   #11
If you are a Muslim, the drink is out of the question. However, if you are not Muslim, you can use it as an advantage without any obligation.
Paulina  17 | 4451
5 May 2024   #12
If only I had your sage advice earlier, I could have saved myself a great deal of heartache.

Really? Why is that? I thought you like drinking lol Also, a woman who isn't into drinking wouldn't be likely to be into a guy who's a heavy drinker, I think...

The proper answer is: How about a walk, instead...

A more likely answer in real life would be: "I'm not that much into drinking alcohol." And then the guy would ask: "How about a coffee or tea then?" And the woman would say then: "OK" :)
Alien  25 | 6201
5 May 2024   #13
And the woman would say then: "OK" :)

Actually, she should have said whether for coffee or tea. But this general 'yes' could be interpreted more broadly.
Paulina  17 | 4451
5 May 2024   #14
@Alien, I think that "coffee or tea" could mean that she's more of a café person, rather than a bar/club person... 🤔

And what if she would like to go for a milkshake or ice cream? ;D Or a warm waffle with whipped cream and chocolate sauce... ;O In what kind of category would she be put by a man then? Infantile? :O Gluttonous? lol Suffering from calcium deficiency?? ;D

I've recently tried bubble tea and I liked it, btw :d 🧋
Alien  25 | 6201
5 May 2024   #15
In case of @Huzaifa997 an alternative would be to go out for a kebab together.🧔👩‍🦰
cms neuf  1 | 1786
6 May 2024   #16
Going for a coffee is pretty teenage IMO. If you are going to ask her for a date at least make it something more special than a Starbucks where you have to stand in line like a dork while she looks for an ugly sofa to sit on. Maybe lunch or visit some exhibition or walk in a park - there are plenty of alcohol free options.
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #17
In case of @Huzaifa997 an alternative would be to go out for a kebab together.🧔👩‍🦰

My guess is that Huzaifa997 isn't really "Huzaifa", but some troll pretending to be a guy from Pakistan :)

Going for a coffee is pretty teenage IMO.

What... ;D In what country? Poland??

at least make it something more special than a Starbucks where you have to stand in line like a dork while she looks for an ugly sofa to sit on.

;D
Sorry, cms neuf, I'm only laughing, because I thought you live in Poland... Have you ever been in a café in Poland? There are plenty of nice cafés (and you can sit there like in a restaurant :P), you can also order alcohol beverages if you want there and order some food, like cakes, desserts, etc.

Maybe lunch

That's a bit more "serious", imho. Asking someone out for a coffee is similar to asking out for a drink - it's more casual. Lunch is longer, so if the date isn't going too well, you have to suffer for a longer period of time xD In case of just going for a coffee - I guess it's good for a first time and testing the waters if someone likes you or not... It's not too long and if you order something to eat you can take it as long as you want anyway, so you'll have enough time to talk.
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #18
Also, if the date goes well you can always go for a walk in the park or sth after that coffee :)

And some articles for the culturally confused ;D :))):

rp.pl/kultura/art16053231-umow-sie-ze-mna-na-kawe

"Women go out for a coffee more often than men, it's a kind of habit for them, something very natural.

Men, on the other hand - if they plan a meeting with their buddies, they usually choose beer. They associate going out for a coffee with romantic relations, an element of the first meeting, a date."

ohme.pl/lifestyle/dla-ponad-polowy-polakow-kawiarnia-to-najlepsze-miejsce-na-pierwsza-randke/

"57% of Polish singles think that going to a café is the best idea for the first date"
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #19
Some more thoughts about going out for a coffee on the first date in Poland...

I think a woman may be more likely to agree to a date than in case of being asked out for a drink because:

- it's safer for a woman: cafés are safe, cultural places and meetings there often take place during the day. People don't get drunk there and noone will put a date rape drug into whatever you're drinking in a café;

- since dates in a café often take place during the day and there doesn't have to be any alcohol involved there's zero expectation/pressure on the woman to have sex with you. So, a woman will be more likely to think that you're not interested only in sex;

- cafés are usually calmer than bars and defenitely more quiet than clubs, so you can have an actual conversation;

- cafés are usually a good choice if you want a romantic atmosphere (as opposed to a bar or a club);

- cafés are a great option for asking out more quiet people, introverts, romantic ladies, intellectual types. Someone who doesn't like going to bars and clubs will defenitely feel more comfortable in a café;

- café may be less "intimidating" than a restaurant for some women, because they're usually more used to going to cafés (when meeting their female friends, for example) and so she may be more relaxed thanks to this.

And from a guy's perspective:

- if you want to pay for her on the first date then cafés are obviously a cheaper option than a restaurant;

- if it turns out that going to a café for the first date is not "good enough" for her then it may mean that she's "high-maintenance" or more on the gold-digging side and so - you can dodge a bullet lol

Btw, in case it wasn't obvious enough yet - yes, I'm a café person :)))

There are plenty of nice cafés

Some photos of cafés in Poland (that's mainly for Americans and the British in case they only know Starbucks) :):


  • IMG_20240506_121312_.jpg

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  • IMG_20240506_121649_.jpg
cms neuf  1 | 1786
6 May 2024   #20
Well I recognize Wedel, Fukier something and I think the Hotel Bristol - all a bit high end for a first date. Wedel is OK I guess.

But I am really struggling to think of cafes in central Warsaw that have waitress service and have even a hint of romance. Most seem to go for the queue up for your drink, dispose of your own plate and listen to loud coffee machines vibe.

Obviously a bit of a generation gap thing Paulina - if I lady told me she wanted to meet for a coffee I would assume she wanted some kind of favor or to oitch some business idea to me. If she suggested to meet for a drink I would put on a nice shirt and have a shave :))
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #21
Well I recognize Wedel, Fukier something and I think the Hotel Bristol - all a bit high end for a first date.

I picked those high end ones on purpose, of course, since you mentioned "something more special" :) There are all kinds of price options though, obviously - you can pick a less posh place that you can afford.

But I am really struggling to think of cafes in central Warsaw that have waitress service

I don't know about Warsaw, but any café I've been to in Kielce had a waitress or waiter :) service (including non-posh ones). What does it matter anyway - if it has or doesn't have a waiting service?

Obviously a bit of a generation gap thing Paulina

Not really, I think it's a cultural thing (since you grew up in the US).

if I lady told me she wanted to meet for a coffee I would assume she wanted some kind of favor or to oitch some business idea to me.

You'd have to know her to think that though :)
jon357  72 | 23238
6 May 2024   #22
and the British in case they only know Starbucks

There's only a couple of us here and in my case I know Warsaw far better than most Poles.

Wedel, Fukier something and I think the Hotel Bristol

Agreed; not a place for youngish people to go on a first date.

But I am really struggling to think of cafes in central Warsaw that have waitress service and have even a hint of romance

There's a fair few. Some nice ones south of Jerozolimskie, especially on Zurawia. They're cafe bars relly however all the above sell booze too.

There's a nice one (two in fact) in PKiN and some surprisingly nice ones in Zoliborz.

If he wants to impress there's a bar called Loreta (a bar but plenty of non-alcohol options) and there's also Havana in Zoliborz which is especially nice in the day time and has a big outside terrace. Havana isn't expensive but is very pleasant. Not waiter/ess service although plenty are.

As the weather gets better there's also some of the riverside ones and of course Hala Koszyki is superb.
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #23
There's only a couple of us here and in my case I know Warsaw far better than most Poles.

I didn't mean you :) I remember that Vincent, for example, was surprised about the look of cafés in Poland and how they work though.

They're cafe bars relly however all the above sell booze too.

That's not a problem as long as you can order a coffee (or tea) there and a piece of cake :)))

Some photos of random non-posh cafés:


  • IMG_20240506_130557_.jpg

  • IMG_20240506_130709_.jpg

  • IMG_20240506_133633_.jpg

  • IMG_20240506_134252_.jpg
jon357  72 | 23238
6 May 2024   #24
That's not a problem as long as you can order a coffee (or tea) there and a piece of cake :))

That's what I think too.

I'd say that the cafes in those photos are all quite smart. Warsaw has some very nice ones and new places all the time.
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #25
Well I recognize Wedel, Fukier something and I think the Hotel Bristol

The first photo is Blossome Café in Wrocław. Second photo - Camelot Lulu in Kraków. Third photo - Cafe Kattowitz in Katowice. The last two photos - HEVRE in Kraków.

I'd say that the cafes in those photos are all quite smart.

I don't know, they look pretty normal to me... I mean, on the nicer side :), of course, but they're definitely not such high-end ones like in that first photo batch I posted. The first photo is La Petite in Warsaw and the last photo is from the "Pożegnanie z Afryką" coffee and tea chain stores/cafés.
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #26
Btw, this was my and my friends' favourite café during our uni times - we would go there often, we even did our homework or some assignments there :) It looked "artsy" and we liked the vibe :) (the decor changed since my uni times though, obviously) - it's called "Wesoła Kafka" and it's still operating :):


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Alien  25 | 6201
6 May 2024   #27
my and my friends' favourite café during our uni times

This design doesn't really suit young girls, but rather older people. My opinion.
Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #28
@Alien, why do you tend to read my comments so selectively? :)))

This design doesn't really suit young girls, but rather older people.

Read this fragment again:

It looked "artsy" and we liked the vibe :) (the decor changed since my uni times though, obviously)

Paulina  17 | 4451
6 May 2024   #29
Btw, as for the present decor of "Wesoła Kafka" I doubt that the intention of owners was to make it "for older people" :)) It's only stylised for "granny style" and I'm guessing that the target clientele are women, considering that in Poland women go to cafés more often than men. I think that this kind of decor is supposed to give you a feeling of cosiness, warmth, familiarity and privacy. You'd also probably think that the shabby chic style of decor is for older ladies, but in reality there are women of different ages that like this style :)
Alien  25 | 6201
6 May 2024   #30
it "for older people

The decor is OK, but do they have good cakes like in the old days and finely ground coffee poured with boiling water in glasses. I still remember the aroma of this coffee from my childhood. The coffee was, of course, heavily sweetened and without milk.


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