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Posts by PolkaTagAlong  

Joined: 2 Jul 2012 / Female ♀
Last Post: 7 Jul 2014
Threads: 10
Posts: 186

Speaks Polish?: no

Displayed posts: 196 / page 1 of 7
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PolkaTagAlong   
29 Jun 2014
Love / Dating a Polish/Italian Guy [18]

Well, when I say a month, I mean about four weekends, which is definitely not enough time to know whether you love someone or not. You must not take the idea of "love" as seriously as I do.

Do you think it would be weird if I kept a little makeup bag with some of my toiletries (mascara, toothbrush, conditioner, lotion etc.) and a change of clothes in his apartment next time I go over there? I feel like if I do a spur of the moment sleepover and I have that stuff over there, I will feel more comfortable at his pad and it may help with my vagina problem. It makes me feel very anxiety ridden when I wake up with stinky breath and smeared makeup and have nothing to wash my face or brush my teeth with. Maybe I could explain this to him and he wouldn't just think I was being clingy. It would help to have an extra swimsuit and change of clothes there.

U guys were right...He was afraid of commitment. I exposed him. He was playing games the whole time. It was HIS idea to play house with me, he was trying to lead me on so that I would sleep with him, pretty slick. I still can't believe he's texting me saying HE needs a few days to "think things over" before we see each other again. I was tempted to say don't flatter yourself but I didn't. I said look, you have TOTALLY gotten the wrong idea, there is NO WAY I will see you again, I just wanted to set the record straight that I knew he was playing a game, I'm not a dummy.
PolkaTagAlong   
29 Jun 2014
Love / Dating a Polish/Italian Guy [18]

Its hard for me to not be really intense and take things seriously because I am borderline. I can have fun and relax and all that but I have a deep need to belong to someone and at some point I can't be happy unless I feel secure with the other person.
PolkaTagAlong   
29 Jun 2014
Love / Dating a Polish/Italian Guy [18]

Well, we haven't known each other that long to have "family involvement" but the fact that the idea of meeting my parents is so aversive to him is a bad sign. In a normal situation it wouldn't be a problem to just introduce yourself or make some small talk but he doesn't want anything to do with them. He defensively made a point of saying that he's been out of the dating thing for so long that the idea of meeting my parents is too much for him right now.

Do you think I should confront him? It's kind of hard to confront someone about their past when you don't know much about it. The only thing that indicates to me that F Stop's assumptions are wrong is that he does NOT want to talk about his ex, but when I did force him to talk about it he was very calm and matter-of-fact. If he still had some kind of feelings for her, he would be transferring those experiences with this ex to me in some way, like talking about her or comparing her to me.

On the other hand, I think he may not be sure of what he wants in a date and could possibly just be infatuated with me because he is relieved to have physical contact with a woman.
PolkaTagAlong   
28 Jun 2014
Love / Dating a Polish/Italian Guy [18]

Are you that sure about this F Stop? He claims that he was distant from her most of his senior year in college but never dated anyone because he was so busy. He says they started to not have anything in common anymore. He says he's new to the "dating thing" which is originally what kind of worried me. I doubt he would want to spend nearly every hour of every weekend with someone if he still had an emotional attachment to someone else. He could be lying about it being over for a long time though, and it could be a complicated thing thus why he is guarded about telling me about his life.

I agree that it is a terrible idea to let him have sex with me at this point, but I think hand jobs and spooning are a totally different thing. This encourages bonding but he won't get everything he wants from me before there is a strong connection.
PolkaTagAlong   
28 Jun 2014
Love / Dating a Polish/Italian Guy [18]

Well, he doesn't "love" me, and I don't "love" him, I just want our relationship to progress. We've only known each other for a month for Christ's sake.
PolkaTagAlong   
28 Jun 2014
Love / Dating a Polish/Italian Guy [18]

I don't think he's using the parents to avoid commitment, that's not what I said. I think he wants someone that fits in with his family, and they are hard core catholics so it is a problem. But in general I think that we grew up with a similar style and that's why we have such a connection.
PolkaTagAlong   
28 Jun 2014
Love / Dating a Polish/Italian Guy [18]

His mom is Polish and his dad is Italian and he was raised Catholic, but he seems removed from religion. We are the same age and we seem to have a strong spark that is there most of the time but sometimes I feel like I'm losing it. We've been dating for about a month. We pretty much spend the whole weekend together and have a great time together most of the time. He is very athletic and has a lot of energy and we do crazy, spur of the moment things. One Saturday we spent all day walking around the gardens, went back to his apartment and then took another walk, went to dinner downtown, went to a bar then had a crazy make-out session in his car. He seems very solid and loyal, he dated the same girl throughout high school and college, but then in his senior year they got more distant from each other and he says he is done with her for good. We are now officially, "going out" as of yesterday (not sure how that is any different than dating).

On the flip side, there are moments where I feel really distant and we kind of don't know what else to say to each other. I kind of feel like this may be because we've been together in too intense of a way for such a short period of time. He said, "Don't worry, I like you for things other than this, you're fun, funny etc." I felt like saying gee you better. The other thing is he kind of doesn't want to talk too much about himself like his friends and where he works. Although he does talk about his family, I got the feeling he really didn't want to meet my parents and he doesn't want anything to do with involving me in his family. I have a feeling his parents would make monster in-laws, one because his mother is a reactive Polish woman and two because they're hard core Catholic.

What do you think I can do right now to plant seeds for our relationship to progress and become a deeper friendship? I feel like the sex is a bad idea because I have a major problem with being able to stay open and I don't know what to do about it. He seems fine with this and totally respectful but it ruins the romance/spark. What can I do to show that I would fit in with his family? I feel like we were raised in a somewhat similar style, but the hard core Catholic stuff causes a huge divide because my immediate family is not religious at all.
PolkaTagAlong   
21 Jan 2014
Life / My Słowianie (music video mocks stereotypes about Poles and Slavs) [46]

[************************ perhaps you could try meditation - no calories and very relaxing. Anger gives you very ugly wrinkles you know[/quote]

Sorry, those on diets can be very angry people. I always have to remind myself how bad WEIGHT looks.

That *******! I DO NOT agree with the message behind this video. I should have realized that anything so audacious and meant to draw so much attention had to be a sinister political ploy. No one flaunts Polish pride the way the polaks secretly teach their children, its too good to be true.

"(Donatan) lived in Russia for eight years, and feels half-Russian, half-Polish. He claims that the Red Army liberated Poland and that our Catholic church are 'ambassadors of a wholly foreign culture'
PolkaTagAlong   
20 Jan 2014
Life / My Słowianie (music video mocks stereotypes about Poles and Slavs) [46]

[************************ video is supposed to be a joke. No reason to hyperventilate. Get a shot of ****** vodka and relax[/quote]

You mean its not ******* serious?

I don't actually drink ******* Vodka though, That would ruin my figure and I would be like the fat girl stereotype at the end of the video.
PolkaTagAlong   
20 Jan 2014
Life / My Słowianie (music video mocks stereotypes about Poles and Slavs) [46]

Who is the Polish version of Muhammad Ali?

**** you! I come and keeka your ass! I'm so beautiful, no one else in the world has these genes! Our beauty can't be compared to anything else in the world! Don't call me a ******* Polak! I'm a doll. That's what I'd say to the haters if I were a Pole.

Wait a minute... I am a *********" Pole, I'm so *********" beatuiful. Germanized Slavic beauty could conquer the world!

(Too much ******* vodka)
PolkaTagAlong   
20 Jan 2014
Life / My Słowianie (music video mocks stereotypes about Poles and Slavs) [46]

Merged: "Us Slavs" Please Translate

It's MLK day, I've decided that I'm celebrating the Slav's fight against the forces/groups that oppress them. Of course I am appreciative of the African-American's fight against racism, but I feel I can better understand their fight if I understand something that involves myself. Many Polish discrimination issues could be compared to African-American issues. The mindset of all oppressed people is the same. One example of how their issues are the same at the core root would be how standards of beauty effect our perceptions of ourselves. African-American women were previously never shown in the pages of Vogue and they just don't fit in to the kind of girl-next-door American beauty ideal. Consequently, many African-American women probably often wish deep down they were not born with those traits, despite the fact that for example, black hair has nothing to do with symmetry, which is by scientific standards what beauty really is. I can sort of identify with these issues because I have a very distinguishable combination of traits along with unusually pale skin. I look like a different breed of Anglo than the population I live amongst and I have always felt so repulsive and like that everything natural about myself is the very opposite of ideal. The standard of beauty where I live is very tan, sleek, no strange easternish deep eyes or sharp chin. Those traits have nothing to do with physical attractiveness though! It is a cognitive bias of a cultural standard! You understand what I mean? I really do understand what black women go through and its just unfair.

In my research, I came across an interesting and funny video. Although it kind of gives me the creeps watching it because its almost like prnography, I like the attitude and the message behind it. My favorite line is, "We have that which no-one else has in their genes." This song kind of reminds me of float like a butterfly sting like a bee. US SLAVS ARE SO BEAUTIFUL! **** YOU HATERS!!! I think to stand up against oppression and not let if affect your life, you have to have an intense pride. That's what has started to bring me out of the dark place I had been in my childhood. I want to know, what do you think of the message in this song?
PolkaTagAlong   
5 May 2013
Genealogy / Do you think all Slavs are white? [178]

The Irish are not white? We are one of the least mixed ethnic groups on the planet.Whiter than white.

Haha?! The Irish, whitest people on the planet? Generally I don't think so!
PolkaTagAlong   
2 May 2013
Genealogy / Do you think all Slavs are white? [178]

I don't think all people who call themselves "Slavs" are really ethnically Slavic. They may be Slavic culturally or linguistically but that does not mean they are white. And remember "Slavic" is not necessarily synonymous with white lol. Are all white Americans really white? No, most are slightly multiracial. I don't believe someone in Russia is Slavic ethnically unless the overwhelming majority of their ancestors are related to the same people as the West Slavs. The Slavs were a very specific group of people, it is not a term that can be used for all people native to Eastern Europe.
PolkaTagAlong   
2 May 2013
Life / Is it True that People in Poland Dislike Charity? [13]

In my experience, Polish people spread their money among their family much easier than Americans do.

This is exactly how it is with my family. My sister helps my parents out by buying them say a new t.v. or something they need for the house every so often, or paying for a vacation. My parents helped my brother out when he was young and in college and they pay for my rent, I use their Internet, and some of my groceries while I'm in school so that I can have time to study and work part time. It is unfathomable to me the distance there is between family members in the current culture. Its a little disturbing to me and that's why I would never marry someone who had a , family situation like that. It doesn't seem right, it would be frightening to be a part of family like that, knowing that they couldn't give two ***** about you. What if you got a serious health problem, or someone stole your identity or you just got laid off? Full time, living wage jobs are hard to come by these days for people in my age category. I would take a mother in law that was a little invasive over a family that was distant from each other any day. You know what I think it is? It's the crudeness and lack of class in American culture. It's the lazy, I don't care about anybody but myself as long as I can sit on my ass and watch ESPN mentality.

As a 16 year old, I had to have multiple surgeries that my parents could not really afford. It must have been like 10 grand in all, the general anesthesia itself for each surgery was like over a grand itself (and it made me sick as a dog, but I had to have it). My sister makes a lot, she would be considered in the upper class, not upper middle class range and she paid for what my parents couldn't without question. We are very tight nit, and we all care very much about each other so we have no problem sharing our money between each other when necessary. If you don't have anyone other than a best friend that you are close to, you have nothing. My extended family is a different story though, we would sue each other, screw each other without question.

If you have a culture where the family takes care of each other, there really isn't a need for "charity" as like a business the way it is now where they want every spare dollar they can possibly squeeze out of you.
PolkaTagAlong   
30 Apr 2013
Life / Is it True that People in Poland Dislike Charity? [13]

I have heard this before, but I'm not sure its true. Its interesting because my whole family shuns charity, including my sister who is well-off. If so why is this? It seems like Catholic people would be number one standbys of the world of private charity. I have nothing against PRIVATE charity, and I'm sure it does good sometimes, but as a person who grew up lower middle class, I have an aversion to charity events and people who ask for money. I don't really believe in it. Some people would probably think I'm a psychopath or something for saying this, but I just don't belive in taking wealth away from people that earned it and giving it to these "organizations" who dole it out however they want to people I don't know.
PolkaTagAlong   
30 Apr 2013
USA, Canada / List of Polish Communities in the Southeast of the US? [18]

Well, I'm sorry for my lack of sensitivity, I'm perfectly aware that everywhere you go people are the same, but I just get a little exicted over the subject because I live beside a culture that makes me crazy. In NC, we have the blue ridge parkway, but that means nothing if you live next to rednecks who hoard their junk.
PolkaTagAlong   
15 Nov 2012
Love / Are Polish men handsome to you? [175]

Ha..the jocks or bodybuilders usually come from working class, the office boys stayed behind.

Me likee good looking, working-class jocks. Gimme a lumberjack!
PolkaTagAlong   
15 Nov 2012
Life / Listen to your Polish family stories [2]

Merged: Stories About Your Crazy Polish Family

Any fascinating instances of sibling rivalry, betrayal, hardship? Any interesting familial quirks that relate to Polish stereotypes or tradition?
PolkaTagAlong   
15 Nov 2012
Life / Is this more related to being raised in Polish culture, or a medical psychiatric disorder? [17]

As a warning to everyone taking this thread seriously lol, I stupidly posted it when I was in a very weird PMS mood and wanted to push people's buttons on here and listen to everyone's crazy stories about their Polish family

That was when I was very young and stupid, plus I never intended to harm myself, but I did get harmed. Like I said I think psychology is not a very good field and I don't take it seriously.
PolkaTagAlong   
10 Nov 2012
Life / Is this more related to being raised in Polish culture, or a medical psychiatric disorder? [17]

I wasn't indicating that I wanted help, I just think it seems to be a funny quirk that runs in the family. I am overly emotional, and I tend to exagerrate things a lot in the moment, so I wasn't really serious about these things when I posted them. I was wondering if it is cultural, that's why I asked on here. I've heard Polish people tend to be overly emotional, and sometimes the family members for example won't speak to each other because of disagreements. I was asking people's opinion, and I know that many people would believe that it sounds like a mental illness, because I had to take a psychology class for my degree. I don't have much respect for psychology as a science though.
PolkaTagAlong   
24 Oct 2012
Genealogy / Is it Likely One of My Polish Ancestors Did Some Funny Business With a Bulgarian? [16]

Why are you so angry? Just learn some basic facts - maybe from here

Because you don't get what I'm trying to say and I don't know how else to explain it to you. People move to different countries all the time and if they become citizens of that country, that is their nationality, not the previous country where they are descended from. We know that the person I am related to is a CITIZEN of Bulgaria.