Language / What has been the hardest language for you to learn? [81]


I actually agree. And if that Anglo-Saxon has spent 8 years studying Caesar's Gallic Wars and other such delightful Latin texts, then Polish is a breeze - I mean, people really SPEAK Polish!! You can go to a bar and LISTEN to it! Cool. Easy. Nice.

Honestly, I really don't find Polish that hard. Now either I am an idiot, or a genius, or showing off, or ... Polish isn't that hard. It is easier than Latin, for damn sure. And for some reason I find it easier than German. Spanish and Italian are like dodgems in terms of language - point and go; French is hard to put in gear, and makes strange noises; Polish is a sports car that drives easier than it looks.

Now my next challenge is going to be ... Russian. That DOES sound tricksy. Is it?

Work / What Jobs are there in Poland for an Englishman besides teaching english? [70]

Why don't you do a job that you can do by email/phone/occasional meetings in the UK/USA/wherever?

Off-Topic / English teachers - 'functioning alcoholics with a superiority complex' [54]

I know, but I did say 'at least' ... better than nothing, and is an intensive course, so in some ways equivalent to a few hours of tuition a week for a year ... a hello of a lot better than nothing.

The ELT books are designed for idiot teachers in mind, you know. No skills are assumed on the part of the T. I should know. Wrote several of them.

Off-Topic / English teachers - 'functioning alcoholics with a superiority complex' [54]


I say, that seems a bit mean!

Ok, you have a point that there are numerous Brits 'teaching' English abroad who do seem to nurse almost daily hangovers, and who have dropped out in one way or another ... but I think nowadays they do actually need some kind of teaching qualification, don't they? Or at least have been on the 4-week TEFL course. Well, any reputable school would require that.

I taught English in a very famous UK school in Poland back in the 1990s, and yes, I saw a very motley crew of Brits in the ranks, particularly at other schools that weren't so fussy in their recruitment. And they all lived in the bars, and spoke pidgin Polish and were a bit embarrassing, really. I went native and pretended I didn't speak English ...

HAVING SAID THAT, I also came across A LOT of Polish English teachers who couldn't actually speak much English. Seriously. Not just the accent - all of the trimmings such as articles, correct tense usage, and other such niceties. They were prepared for lessons and didn't stink of last night's vodka, but the English they were teaching was suspect, to say the least.

But that was ages ago ... I though it must have all changed by now?

One important point, though: nobody can hope to teach a foreign language out of that country (e.g., teach English in Poland) and for students to perfect that language. It is impossible. You have to live in the country of origin to have even a chance of getting to the higher levels of real fluency. So: the aim of learning English in Poland has to be competent communication (someone knows you're not English, but still understands you, and you them). In which case, if those Polish English teachers were just a bit better at English, they would probably best best for the job ... (and I'm sure thousands are, nowadays, 99% perfect at English ...).

Travel / Is there a healthy expats scene in Poland? (drinks, food, golf, etc.) [143]


just warning him.

Travel / Is there a healthy expats scene in Poland? (drinks, food, golf, etc.) [143]


and sex ...

Love / Polish husband threatens divorce and wants to send me back to Asia [15]

He can't make you have an abortion, and he can't divorce you after two months and have you deported.
You need to go straight to a lawyer and find out your situation. I am pretty sure he also can't just leave you abandoned with nowhere to live and no money, and pregnant with his child, as well.

Language / Lubicie, pamiętacie, mówicie [5]


well, it is the second person PLURAL, so yes, you would be addressing at least two people ...

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


Yes, you have, and you seem to me anyhow to have been consistently clear and coherent! The one I find a little hard to follow is F4 ... not quite sure what engendered the attack on you, as you are actually one of the mildest commentators here. And fairest.

Problem with this subject is that being fair means, in some cases, making the woman in particular take responsibility for something some women want an easy way out of. And carrying a child/giving birth is quite a big thing to have to do as a result of what might have been only a few seconds' liaison, shall we say. And people are scared of insisting on this, as it seems heavy-handed. But there needs to be a boundary, at some point.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


You know, I agree with that. First really sensible suggestion from any of us, including me.

Education is the way. So we should not be showing 9-year-olds awful birth videos, but rather regularly showing them amazing 3D images + films of the developing child in utero. That sounds much more positive, and would presumably build up much more respect for life. And would, in turn, presumably have more effect in making them think twice before having convenience abortions - and/or before having convenience sex ...

Choice, no, is not always good. People talk as if it is, though.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


Ok ... but wouldn't the absolute ideal, given the ambiguity (for some) of when life begins, be to make absolute efforts to prevent 'unwanted' pregnancy? Because, to be realistic, a lot of the time we are talking a scenario something like this:

Young woman gets drunk at the time of ovulation, which is a double-whammy as most ovulating women cannot think straight - have only one aim, regardless of whether they recognise it as this or not - and when you add the disability of being drunk, you have the perfect situation for her to sleep with someone - whoever - with absolutely no thought for the consequences. (NB, she doesn't have to be young, or drunk, but quite often is).

[A small note on the ovulating female: women who are on their own hormones rather than taking a hormone-based contraceptive WILL behave differently when they are ovulating. It is a very, very strong instinct - basically, to mate - and a lot of them don't realise it, but those are the few days when they have good hair days, when they feel happy even if if it is raining, when every guy on the street seems to have something nice about him, when their partner or whoever seems particularly delicious, whatever his faults or however badly he has behaved ... They are the days when the neighbour comes over for supper and, seemingly out of character, flirts dreadfully with someone else's husband, even though she only had one glass of wine ... They are the days when other women, not at that moment, look with envy at the glowing one. Do not anybody even attempt to gainsay this, because it is as true as anything ever was.]

So, the hormone-crazed woman, possibly also young and drunk, making her even less sensible, just has to have it. And gets pregnant. And then maybe it isn't the right time, or the right man, or she and her husband already have two lovely children and don't want another because they've had enough of screaming kids ... who knows. But she is in a fix and needs to correct that crazy mistake. And she finds out two weeks' later or so, when she isn't ovulating, when she is calm and sensible and thinking 'straight', and freaks out.

That is the usual scenario. Tell me any different.

So we are saying, that because of her irresponsible actions, someone has to die.

So ... why don't we bring young women up not to spend most of their university nights in the pub, and then having sex? Or, have very strong anti-abortion laws that really scare people, enough to make them think twice? It has to be one, or the other, or both.

But to say 'it is your right to get drunk / have as much sex with whoever as you like / abort as many kids as you like' - it just an open door. Almost an invitation.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


I just don't like the tone of this. I said 'bean' because I have seen a scan at this stage (of my daughter, now 4). It was at 6 weeks and no, it wasn't yet possible to see her arms or legs, but what I saw was like a little jumping bean. The consultant commented on how lively she was. But yes, that was my daughter, in the very early stages of her development. It was her from the moment of conception, and any argument otherwise is pure nonsense.


OK ... so say it for what it is: It is ok for the woman to choose to kill the person she has created, for her pretty much whatever reason she chooses, and even for such a reason as that it doesn't suit her life plan at the moment to allow that other person to live, or that she doesn't like the father. In fact, she almost doesn't have to give a reason: it is her right to 'choose' - not to choose what happens to her body, but to choose whether the other person lives or not. That is the real choice here.

Well, frankly, I think that is a bogus 'right'.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


Absolutely. How anyone can think otherwise I find very difficult to understand, apart from in the context of people arguing otherwise because they feel they should be allowing 'choice' to the woman over 'what happens with her body', and therefore they equivocate to give the notion of abortion the chance of not actually being killing a life.

Funny, isn't it, that those pro-'choice' are also the ones who can't agree when life begins, but are fairly certain it doesn't being at conception. Well, not really funny.


Yes, of course, because this is what it is.

But any of us who say that are 'extreme'. I am because I am 'damaged' by having been forced into a termination in my early 20s. You all are because you are just ... stupid? Illiberal? Mad Catholics? Only those who tread the 'middle way' and are 'pro-choice' are the realistic, moral, sensible ones.

Apparently. Or maybe it is as black & white as we say - there is life, there is death/non-life. Nobody argues when a person dies over whether they are really dead or not. It is obvious they are dead. So go watch a 6-week ultrasound scan, see the little bean jumping up and down with life, and say it isn't alive. It is black and white, dead or alive. You terminate it, it isn't alive any more, isn't jumping any more, is gone. That isn't something that can be debated.

Nobody doing ultrasounds talks about life not beginning at conception. There is a heartbeat or not. If there isn't, tough - there is no debating. It just isn't there. And the weirdest thing is, you have people doing ultrasounds and saying 'look - there's the baby! Can you see it? It's tiny!' in one room, and next door practically along the corridor they are handing out abortion pills and not mentioning anything about a life ... 3m makes the difference between whether that baby is a baby, or just something that needs to be got rid of. Now tell me that isn't crazy, double standards ...

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


Mostly, the woman isn't overtly told she is 'ending' a life. She is told she is 'terminating a pregnancy'. She specifically is told, if she asks, that the 'fetus' (note no use of words such as baby, unborn child, etc.) isn't alive like you and me and can't feel anything. She is also specifically told nothing about the stage of development he/she is at when the termination will take place.

Basically, everything is done to make her feel she is just having a sensible procedure to halt, at an early stage, a process that might eventually down the line have resulted in her having a baby. She is distanced in every way possible from the reality.

Then after the operation, when in many cases it hits the woman what she has allowed to be done (she has the rest of her life to reflect on it), the abortion company are well gone and not interested - they have cashed their cheque.

That is how it works. So all this 'choice' propaganda has been encouraged and perpetuated to facilitate abortion. Anybody who dares to say that isn't right is tarred as some kind of crazy extremist - which just isn't true. It is, to my mind, one of the biggest and most harmful con-tricks in modern society.


Yes, totally agree. It is unmitigated nonsense to suggest that because a human being starts out tiny that at that stage it isn't a human being because it can't, e.g., see yet. Of course it is a human being - just in the early stage of development. Unfortunately, any creature in the fetal stage is incredibly vulnerable - one would have thought that with our level of civilisation and intelligent 'society', that we would prioritise protection of the unborn to the highest level. How sad that we do not - that quite the opposite - we use the very vulnerability of new life as an excuse to extinguish it, should it not have been created intentionally or at a convenient moment. How shameful of us.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


So if we are not God, how come we can lock up or execute people for killing someone else? That isn't an argument at all. Of course we, as a society, have to take action sometimes, and have to try to identify the absolutely strongest moral standpoint, and to set an example, support moral actions, and outlaw immoral actions. And this discussion is about how life, once created, should be sacrosanct. About how at the start, human life is, yes, extremely fragile, and should be nurtured, along with the woman whose role it is to protect this tiny life. To offer her the option of extinguishing this life undermines the very foundation of all of our lives. If it is so easy, and so allowable, for this little life to be snuffed out ... then who are we? And to be snuffed out because ... it doesn't suit the woman's immediate plans for her future? Because of money? Because she hasn't had a child before and is scared of childbirth? We should address these issues, then, and not just take the coward's way out, and get rid of the life.

So don't talk about playing God. Nobody is suggesting that. To my mind, it is to play God to intervene and remove a life which would otherwise grow to maturity. That is messing with Nature. Supporting a woman to go through a natural process is not.


Her body. Which is pregnant, through her actions. Not anybody's choice any more. Not even hers.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


? don't even quite understand that, but no, whatever it is ... I just think some people on here understand how precious life is, and others don't seem to understand that.

Love / How can I make my Polish guy comfortable while in States? [12]


Bowing and scraping. Buying presents. But not much you can really do, because they know the score: as a result of you, he is going away. Simple. I think you need to emphasise this isn't a forever plan.

Life / Poles and the temperatures they heat their homes [36]


Slippers, slippers, and, I say again ... Slippers.

I once went on a little trip to a lake with lots of Polish family, in two cars. We got there. Even though we were in the UK, it was unusually, genuinely hot - about 32 degrees. I thought the smallest member of la famille, who was not yet 1, was not with us - because he wasn't anywhere to be seen. After half an hour or so of strolling round in the roast, eating a couple of ice lollies, etc, suddenly he was produced, from inside ... a locked people carrier. He was as purple as a beetroot, and clad in ... TIGHTS. Tights. Blimey. That says it all, for me.

Bonkers.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]

But I do so get your point. Life is precious. If someone has just jumped onto the float and caught it, as that tiny flame of new life has done, then we need to cherish it, in the same way that if there is a moment when someone here could be lost, we have to fight for them while we can, because eternity is a hell of a long time, and there is no coming back. It is just blank. So we fight the darkness.

And that is why I love babies, and new life. They have actually come out of the darkness. They are a total gift. And the idea that someone could trash that ... you know what? I'm kind of not even interested in those people. Not at all.

It seems to me that some of us know, and understand, and get it, and some just don't. I could make a list here ...

The ones who get it:
p3undone
4 foreigner
Rysavy
Kondzior
Grzegorz
and the lady who told us about the dreadful gun business, out-of-state clinics, etc.

The ones who, sad to say, don't:
WB (sometimes actually does, but only intermittently)
Delphiandomine
Gabi (not through lack of co-operation - almost by being too 'fair')
Rozumieniec (probably does get it, but too shy to admit it)
Jon357 (deliberately doesn't get it)

And SeanBM is just provocative on purpose : )

But don't hold me to that list. It meant nothing. It was just an observation, and no offence to be taken ...

Will say, though, that slightly disappointed by the female contribution. We have had mostly women who have had neither children nor abortions, saying how the woman has a right to do what she wants with her body, and how an unborn child isn't alive. And then just a couple of us who actually have children, saying whe-hey - hang on a second here - you got it all wrong ...

The guys, on the other hand, have mostly been way more balanced and intelligent and feeling about this. Not so hormonal, I guess ; )

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]

It was a turn of phrase ; )

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


whatever ... WB identified the categories ... so if you aren't pregnant before implantation, then ok, implantation would be the stage for me - the earliest stage at which it is not ok! Because for me I wouldn't have an abortion, because I don't agree with it (in case hadn't got that across ; ).


At our school we talked about it several times, and even had debates about it ... and the whole thing was always about 'choice'. Then I experienced the reality of it and realised that was a load of bollocks and that what was being done was, sorry to sound emotive, but actually murder. The shock of it nearly finished me off, and certainly was far far more effective at ruining my life than having a baby would have been.

So talking at school doesn't really help. You don't know what you're dealing with until you face the real situation. We also debated capital punishment in an earnest, sixth-former type way - but I bet we might have felt differently had any of us sat in the public gallery while it took 10 mins to electrocute someone ...

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


For myself it would be fertilisation - i.e., abortion just not an option.

For those who have to have an abortion, ideally it would be before the hear starts to beat, so before 6 weeks.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


I just imagined a Polish-type scenario of Babcia doing most of the work ... ; ) And for sure every kid in that situation knows Babcia is Babcia, and Mama is Mama.



Aren't those two scenarios contradictory?
Anyhow, the 'all alone in a council flat' idea is not the norm ... difficult to get a council flat nowadays ...


I would physically restrain her from having an abortion after 6-7 weeks.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


It is a difficult situation because she is barely out of childhood herself, and she probably doesn't appreciate what it is to have a child, and what the full truth of her options is.

If she were my daughter, I would not suggest abortion, because of how traumatic and damaging it is, and how it results in a death, and the subsequent grief. I would try to give her the most truthful explanation of her options. I suspect that I would encourage her to have the baby, and that I would then take over the responsibility for bringing it up, until such time as she was able to take this on. She should complete school, and go to university. And there would come a moment where she was ready to have her child with her. And her child would be there.

So: I don't think that abortion should be the first-choice option. I think bringing the baby into a supportive family, and supporting the young mother as well. You say she has money, and a middle-class background, so ... I think that having the baby would ultimately be less damaging for her than having an abortion.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


? Haven't quoted any figures, no. Absolutely not. Have offered my opinion based on personal experience. If you had climbed Mount Everest, and I hadn't, I wouldn't expect you to quote me figures about how many people had, what their reasons had been, etc. - I would expect you to tell me what it was like - to give me your personal experience. Your individual response. That would be more valuable to me than figures.


You seem to speak English but I get the feeling we aren't speaking the same language.
I meant that your arguments led to a point of absolute nonsense, if followed through - where you wouldn't admit that a baby, out of the mother, was a human being. That is pretty crazy, surely?

But hey. As you say, it takes all sorts. What has annoyed me are your authoritative generalisations about women - such as that they cannot tell when they are fertile, that childbirth is a monstrous ordeal, etc., ... and the patronising attitude, but I'm sure you meant well. No offence taken.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


you dare to suggest what anybody should consider their responsibility? ; )

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]

Wasn't being sanctimonious or religious - just incredulous.

We all said pretty much that abortion in certain circumstances was an acceptable option, but we differed on what those circumstances were. Some of us extreme medical danger to the women, and/or a situation such as someone having been raped, and others of us ... that if it didn't suit the woman, for whatever reason, it was fine to abort as the 'thing' is only a thing anyhow, and not scientifically proven to be 'alive' or 'a person' (according to Google) ...

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


Correction. You 'discussed' it - you said that according to your googling, women who suffered emotional trauma were in the minority, and that they mostly already had suffered from depression or had a leaning towards it. You basically said that these women were unstable anyhow, and it was nothing to do with the abortion. Which, is nonsense.

You really know absolutely nothing about this, all of your comments are based on questionable 'research' and an extraordinarily patronising attitude. You even argue yourself into the corner of saying that you don't know whether a newborn baby is a person or not, which is extraordinary nonsense. Are we only people when we have lived a specified time and died? We are always developing. Always. Until we decay. From conception, to death.

You have said that you don't want children, and consider pregnancy and childbirth an unacceptable ordeal for yourself. So ... whatever you do, do not patronise those of us who have had several experiences that you have never, and will never, have. Because you just don't know what you're talking about. You talk about respect, but are extremely selective in what you respect. And you are showing absolute lack of respect for the experiences and opinions of others here.

But it is so about you. Anyhow, that aside ... if there is no morality set in stone, then presumably that applies to everything. So just tell us, before you go - if a murderer says he felt he was justified (such as the guy in Norway), then it is OK, and we should respect his freedom of choice, and of belief, however distasteful we find it? Because that is where your argument ends up.

News / Abortion still under control in Poland [2971]


a unique 'THING' according to some here ...

Gabi, a question for you:

Fetuses, as you prefer to call them, are known as 'fetus' medically up until delivery. So, then, why have any limit at all to abortion? Isn't a 9-month termination just as OK? Because one of the points some of us have been making is that in carrying out abortion while the 'fetus' is small, when it is relatively easy to do, it is equally easy to pretend nothing serious has been done, when in fact it has. But you have said that while the 'fetus' is in the mother, it is not born, and therefore not alive, and not a person. So does it become a person when it comes out? By your high-level reasoning, then that must mean that while the 'fetus' is still within the mother, it is ok to abort.

Do you get in any tiny way how spurious your logic is?

Food / What made in Poland produce would you recommend [110]


Pity because yes, I was going to say Polish produce - my two beautiful children ; )

But ok ... if you ask ... this summer I found some astonishing tomatoes in Poland. Like, tomatoes from Greece. From a hot Mediterranean country. They were amazing. I brought a whole Ryanair cabin bag full of them home. And they didn't cost £1.99 each.