The current economic crisis in the USA is not without its physical manifestations. For just as the American's budget contains blubber, so does the American himself.
Translation- Polish nut job taking a crap.
I have detailed for you, in the form of the rise in earthquakes, just one of the many, many environmental disasters caused by the gross obesity and uncontrolled appetites of Americans. This then, the uncontrolled appetites of the Americans, is the beginning of the worldwide blubber crisis. But there is an even more alarming consequence of the swinish American character than the environmental ruin that I have just cataloged. For the American blubber mass is also a moral abomination. No longer able to be classified as human, these Americans must now be branded as pigs, inasmuch as they have given themselves over to the most reprehensible practices.
We see in the female pig, or in the fat blubberous American woman, a disturbing tendency toward the physical torture of children. Otis Harrel's study of child care workers showed that 73% of all full-time American babysitters are obese women - note: we are not talking of teenage girls who work part-time for movie and chewing gum money, but the terminally obese female pigs who, because of their repellent physical characteristics, are unable to secure full-time employment in the public sector, and must therefore turn to full-time child care work where their fat bodies can be safely hidden from the public's view behind the locked doors of the homes of families with working parents or in day care centers. These ugly female endless eaters have been naturally selected to be shunted away from decent society.
Unfortunately, the only position left available is child care. In a tragedy beyond compare, these hideous cellulite nannies are the absolute worst surrogates to care for our children. Harrel's study has shown that female pigs, when exposed to healthy thin children, begin to experience feelings of intense self-loathing. This self-loathing is then projected, via the fatty's ego defense mechanism, onto the innocent thin child. Harrel has documented the findings with over 500 hours of video tape of child torture. Dozens of families and commercial child care institutions allowed Harrel to install video surveillance equipment in their homes and day care centers. The results are truly horrific, ladies and gentlemen: 200-300 pound greasy haired female pigs victimizing thin children, screaming the most profane epithets imaginable, while slapping, punching, scratching, and clawing at the innocent thin. Worse yet, some attack the normal youths with scissors, needles, forks, knives, even the children's own toys. One 260-pound behemoth live-in nanny was even caught on tape loading a pretty 35-pound girl into a clothes dryer. How do they get away with this? By threatening the children with death if they dare tell their parents. 'You skinny little rat, if you tell your mother, I'll cut you into bite-size pieces and cook you and eat you,' we hear one massive sitter growl.
The American female pig's cannibalistic lust has an interesting parallel in Nazi Germany. A little reported fact is that the second most blubberous nation on record in human history is Nazi Germany. And even in that loathsome society, where men eagerly volunteered to commit the most heinous atrocities, still, when it came to the mass extermination of Jewish, Slavic, and handicapped children, only overweight Frauleins could be moved to operate the crematoria. This ugly fact is documented in Heinrich Zifftag's "
Hansel and Gretel as Fact: Obese Women in Nazi Germany."