Off-Topic / What's your connection with Poland? Penpals. [554]

Two children, one ex-husband, one ex-mother-in-law, one current partner and family, and a natural suspicion of prawns (although I can overcome this - Poles, it seems, cannot) (or not the ones I know).

And a lot of friends.

Went out to teach English in Poland on a 2-week contract, and decided it was too interesting a place to suss in just 2 weeks, so stayed for 2 years and returned home with booty husband. And the rest is (a rather chequered) history ...

Love / My husband is Polish and I was wondering why he drinks all the time. [66]


sorry - the answer is 'because he is Polish'. that's what they do. it's cultural.

after a few shots, try serving him water instead of vodka - he might not notice the difference ... oh, or tell him that he is beginning to smell, that he snores and that he looks like a tramp. polish guys are usually quite vain as well, so it might stop him.

Work / Teaching English in Zakopane, is it safe? [45]

i am sure you will be absolutely fine. i am really sorry that you have to worry like this, but honestly, zakopane has a lot of tourism and i'm sure lots of different nationalities are seen there all the time. it is a beautiful place and that has brought people there.

i can't believe it isn't safe. it isn't like east germany in the 1980s. it is totally different. and some poles might blow hot air about people who are different from them, but i think in reality they are very welcoming. that is my experience (seeing they interact with people of different races in my house).

it will be great. don't worry. look forward to it. if anything, you will seem exotic and they will all be after you ; ) and remember all the kids are brought up on mtv and there is a high african-american representation there ... you will be like a pop star.

Life / 3 reasons why you hate Poland. [1049]

1. plastic wc seats that are so light they flap up and down when you open the bathroom door

2. extraordinarily depressing built-in wardrobe-drawer units in mahogany plastic that cover a whole wall to 2.5m height and are adorned with icons and nic-nacs and that everyone (young and old alike) considers 'very smart' ...

3. that white sky

(3.a. that white sky the morning after a Polish wedding and a lot of vodka) (mind you, there is usually sex to cheer one up, it being Poland)

Life / 3 reasons why you hate Poland. [1049]


well, sex does cheer one up
and somehow sex in poland is better than sex in england
blimey no idea what kind of hang-ups in me that touches upon ... ! am not going there ; )

Life / 3 reasons why you hate Poland. [1049]


you got it
yes, actually that is the most aggravating thing about poles
it makes me want to kill them with my bare hands (sometimes)


they are too fat. they would fall off

Language / Polish was chosen the HARDEST LANGUAGE in the world to learn... :D [1558]


so when people say to me 'you speak great English' (because my Polish speaking is so convincing they think i am Polish) ... then i really REALLY should feel good?

is a bit like when they won't sell me alcohol because they think i'm too young
is the sort of compliment that makes you feel like there is one big bouncy castle somewhere underneath you

i have learnt/dabbled in Latin, French, Italian, German, Greek (modern) and Spanish, and yes, Polish is way the hardest. way the most fun, too, though ...

Marek2010
but all of them - this is what they are thinking

i know - they (you) are extraordinarily sly. it is a sort of cultural defence mechanism. my lying skills have soared since i began conducting my life in Polish. this language has eroded my morality. i feel myself saying and doing things i have only seen people doing in war films ... (the ones where they either got caught, or are trying not to)

Love / How to show a polish Guy I like him [56]

he is polish, and a guy

That means he is like a guy only double it

so don't show him you are even the slightest bit interested in him

if you start being nice to him, or, God forbid, say you love him, then he will lose respect for you ... unless, that is, he hasn't had sex with you yet, and/or you are very rich.

ok, ok, i know that is only certain (Polish) guys. but seriously. don't be so daft - if he is being cool, don't do the girl thing and think that means he's shy and/or waiting for the green light. no. he is Polish, after all. if he wants to jump you, he will, no doubt about that.

so be as cool as you can and don't think he needs to hear about your feelings. he doesn't. not until he is truly in love with you.

(jeez but i am jaundiced, non?!)

Love / Do Polish men make good husbands? [106]

The obvious answer is that it depends on the individual, but actually it depends on how the individual reacts to the culture in which they are brought up ... which in this case, shapes men to be quite difficult for a woman from a more 'emancipated' culture.

Men are men, women are women. Quite refreshing for those of us from cultures where we were all supposed to be 'the same', and quite sexy in a way, but also means that if you aren't making the guy open sandwiches with ham, gherkins and egg mayo for his bedtime snack every night, then you are a bad woman ... all Polish men, however intelligent and well-educated, expect you to be the perfect 1950s housewife, as well as being cool, different, free-thinking and incredibly sweet and nice. I am ok with most of that, but have had to work on the 1950s housewife bit ; ) ... but I just pretend to be the mother from Bewitched, and it works ok. Oh, and there is also absolutely no being in the tiniest bit fat. Ever. Just not permitted.

Seriously, it will take you years to understand what standard you are being held up to. You will at some point probably feel outraged that such things are expected of you. You will probably also rebel in one way or another. And then, maybe, for the sake of the children you will probably have had by then, you might just start making the open sandwiches. If you really get into it, you will cut the tomatoes into little crown shapes as well ... and in return, you will have a deeply protective, jealous, proud, demanding, energetic, frustrating, stubborn, emotional, funny and generally alive sort of husband, who is most likely also very warm physically, and somehow strangely forgiveable, despite all his massive faults. You will have a Pole.

Love / Do Polish men make good husbands? [106]


You got it.
The family will at first be very nice to you, in the wary way a group of natives might circle a missionary and seem almost friendly.

But believe me, before long you will be soup in the pot, over the campfire, and most likely scalped beforehand.

Polish women in particular are very very very jealous of their men - even, eg, if their brother-in-law marries or is with a non-Polish woman.

And remember that to Polish women, anything you do that is in the tiniest bit different to them will be seen as outrageous behaviour. Not to be tolerated. And they will want to rescue their own from your evil (or inept) clutches.

There will be a turning point, when they will start talking to him about you, or criticising you openly, when he is there, but you aren't. Then they will start saying things like 'well, if you aren't happy with her, life is too short' (most likely after you and him have had an argument caused by their meddling).

Yep. That's the way it goes. Polish husbands are expensive, emotionally speaking. But can be worth it.

Love / English Men vs Polish Men [207]

Polish men are more real than English men. They are more in touch with who they are. They are more open emotionally. They are stronger. They have a stronger and more confident (totally confident, usually) vision of what it is to be a man, and what to be a woman. This comes with the baggage of what might be construed as sexist tendencies by a liberal English girl, but a lot of that liberality is nonsense, and only ends in tears.

Polish men are like Yorkshire men. They are Northerners rather than Southerners. Sorry to say that, and no offence meant, but there is quite a range of men in the UK, whereas there are only two or three types in Poland, and all of them the same in some ways.

English men are generally either a bit mean, or a bit pathetic. Quite a lot of them aren't quite sure how they are allowed to be a man nowadays. Poles don't have any such issues. And they are great fun.

But I must say that it isn't the fault of English men ... it is the fault of our dithering, eminently reasonable, totally permissive society ... we have gone a long way to emasculating our men. They tend generally to have a great time with Poles, and feel a lot better about themselves - English men are happier in a 'real man' environment, eg, with Poles.

As for the best guy to be with ... your Pole probably won't wash up that much, most likely really never ever will wash and iron, but he will hug you all night and make you feel alive. And make you laugh. Not far off perfect.

Love / Polish women are the most beautiful in the world! [1718]

Polish women are genetically advantaged, BUT ... they are also taught how to be beautiful, by their mothers.

My four-year-old will not, for example, leave the house without matching shoes, gloves, and sunglasses. She is on her way to maximising those Polish genes of hers. Hurray!

And I also remind her that princesses always smile.

Love / Polish women are the most beautiful in the world! [1718]


Well then I guess I should be happy that when I lived in Poland, everyone thought I was Polish ; )

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


Is this some sort of a joke?

As a normal female, intact as I was when I came out of the womb, I would (as would most of the world) be horrified at the idea that anyone should 'rearrange' my genitals.

So why, please tell me why, should it be ok to chop off someone's foreskin?

The foreskin is there for several good reasons. It has a job to do, as does everything Nature provided. And given that reproduction is our primary drive, and the male organ the primary deliverer of this function ... do you honestly think Nature would have got it wrong??????

Bollocks (excuse the oblique pun) to all this nonsense about 'cleanliness' and 'disease'. I am obviously not a guy, but I understand that if one practises basic, simple hygiene procedures in the shower, it is more than possible to keep your dick clean. ! Suffice to say I have intimate knowledge of an uncircumcised male who is perhaps the cleanest person on the planet. The phrase 'you could eat your dinner of it' comes to mind.

It is a monstrous idea, cutting off the foreskin. OK, if someone has a problem, it is too tight, it hurts them ... ok. That is medical. But as a matter of culture and principle? Maybe, eons ago, when tribes lived in water-less regions, but even then ... sorry. I think it is barbaric. The mechanism of the foreskin is a thing of wonder to behold. Why oh why would anyone even think of messing with that?????

Love / Polish women are the most beautiful in the world! [1718]

Yes, Poles are extraordinarily mean about British women, and generalise in a way that one can't, really, in such a mixed society. What everybody avoids saying, of course, is that broadly speaking, the issues of obesity, looking bad, etc, are attached to class bands. There are some very rough people in the UK, and they are usually either painfully thin, or monstrously fat and ill-kempt. If you look at the girls in Oxford, where I am, you will see a hoard of rough ones, fat spilling over jeans, hair greasy and pulled back, dressed exclusively at Primark, and then you will also see a host of slim beauties from a different class of parent.

We all give this blanket verdict that Polish girls are beautiful, but I have also seem some very rough-looking Polish buggers. An insistence on too much make-up, hairstyles verging on the crazy (and certainly cruelty to the supposedly - or previously - living thing that was their hair), and kitted out in white and pink Nike and Adidas. And a mean look on their faces. And I have also seen plump Polish girls.

So: I would say there is a certain type of Polish beauty which is very appealing, and that in general, the population is more similar, and there are many more of a normal weight. English, Welsh, Irish and Scottish girls - all very different in themselves. English girls seem to come off worst, because there is a wider range of types, and a vast, and growing, group of badly-dressed, over weight. And that is to do with their upbringing, not their genes. And then we get on to a different debate.

There are more mongrels in the UK, though. Poland does have purer racial lines. So I guess that is also what people sense, but don't want to say, as it sounds bad, somehow. Well, no more bad than saying all English girls are fat and monstrous. If so, why are so many Polish guys with English women? Because they are ... generally nicer? ; ) Shall I generalise that there are lots of very hard, ambitious, self-serving, b**chy Polish women? No, because it wouldn't be fair. I know some wonderful Polish women, and I know some absolute cows. And it has to be said that however 'beautiful' someone is, when they behave badly, they look bad.

Love / Polish women are the most beautiful in the world! [1718]


? Did I say I was half-Polish? I am not Polish at all. I am a Yorkshire/Welsh/East London/Scottish/French cross, like any self-respecting mongrel. I just got the Zeta-Jones cheekbones from Wales, and a pair of pretty nice green eyes from the rest.

Yes, as I said, there are some really rough-looking Polish women ... generally the ones on the street rather than the ones in these photos people post here ...

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


Oh, come on. 6-legged babies are, of course, where something went wrong - but they are not the plan, not how Nature actually intended. Breast cancer is due to chemical pollutants and stresses that we have imposed on ourselves (it doesn't exist in primitive societies), so unfortunately a reaction of our bodies to generally unnatural things. And bad teeth? Do you think Nature intended us to eat sugar by the bucket-load?

I don't know quite why there is such a gung-ho approach to a delicate physiological mechanism. What, is it easier to keep clean if you are circumcised? Frankly if I were a guy, I think I'd rather stay intact and make a bit more effort in the shower ... but I am not a guy, so can't say. Only would say from a female point of view, that I prefer the uncut version. I guess the Polish ladies do as well ...

Love / Polish women are the most beautiful in the world! [1718]


Oh boy, are you right there ... I will never forget how shocked I was when I discovered that anti-Semitism was the open norm in Poland ... I had naively thought that after what happened in the war, the Poles would be sympathetic to the Jews. Very naive.

But to keep on-thread: do we think, then, that Polish women are considered the most beautiful by Polish men because they are racially pure? I know Polish guys really don't like Polish girls going off with ethnically-different guys in the UK ... especially if of a skin-colour not entirely white ... and there is a kind of international Polish sperm donor bank, but it is only open to those of 'pure' Polish origin ... (I know that's not exactly relevant, but it is quite an interesting little nugget of info, I think).

Oh, and also because Polish guys are macho and WANT their women to be considered the most beautiful in the world ... there is great loyalty to the Polish female among Polish guys, however much make-up and however orange she is. So long as she is thin, she is beautiful.

Love / Polish women are the most beautiful in the world! [1718]


Sorry ... I must have been tired. I didn't mean that everyone is like that. I just met a lot of (older) people who had that sort of opinion. Anyhow, nothing to do with how pretty or otherwise Polish girls are.

Polish women are often mean because they are hungry/have drunk too much strong coffee. So maybe that explains the thin/beautiful but b**chy ...

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]

Saw a pic of a circumcised ahem appendage recently and it was all labelled up, in medical fashion. One label, pointing to a jagged-looking ridge of scar tissue, said 'Scar'.

Call me crazy, but it really didn't look good, and I would question a procedure that mutilates someone's arguably most vulnerable part in this way ... sorry to say mutilate, but it did look a bit drastic ...

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


It sounds like it might have some health benefits re: in particular the HPV which can cause all sorts of awful things.

However, as a female, I will put up my hand to say that I prefer the uncut, uncensored, untouched version ... sorry ... perhaps that should be the next discussion ...

Life / Things that annoy you in Poland. [114]

I hate the mixture of snow and dog sh*t ... really hate that dog sh*t. And the old ladies who stand holding the little red leads of their tiny pooches as they relieve themselves everywhere ... and then when the snow MELTS ... jeez ...

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


Yeah, I have to say that I imagined the ones saying that circumcision is the absolutely necessary thing to make the otherwise naturally-imperfect male PERFECT, are the ones who unfortunately, when they were tiny babies with only their parents to protect them, were handed over for the snipping.

I am really sorry that happens. At least the practice could be changed so that boys only do it aged 18 plus, with consent (of course!!) ... and the signature of two (impartial) doctors ...

So yep, trying to convince us all that Poland is backwards because they don't do that to babies routinely and don't exert cultural pressure on all parents to do that to their little boys is ... not gonna work, really.

End of thread.

Language / Is the term 'Polak' derogatory?? [254]

Not in Polish. But if you say it in English ... yes, it is totally derogatory, and especially if preceded by 'effing' ...

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


I was only trying to put my point across, as well - that apart from the health and medical benefits, there are other considerations. The point about Poland is just that this discussion is clearly angled towards 'Poland is backwards/somehow prejudiced because it doesn't circumcise its males routinely, as part of its national institution' - and I was siding with Poland, because I can see some strong reasons for not doing it.

Let's face it ... however much medical evidence is proposed (and there is always counter-evidence), the main issue is one of culture. And the sub-text of this whole discussion is something along the lines of 'Is Poland's refusal to circumcise, despite the obvious health benefits of this practice, not yet another example of its racism/anti-semitism/imperialism?' ... isn't it?

And I was just saying: maybe they don't circumcise because they don't like the idea of it, and it's unnatural, and seems rather cruel? And not because they are anti-semetic?


I should hope not, especially given the health risks ...

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


I don't think you really meant that.

Are you American by any chance? Because my response above was actually a joke. I was joking about not forcing an uncircumcised item down someone's throat, especially given the health risks.


You get root canals because of tooth decay. You get wisdom teeth pulled because of similar problems. Do you really think that a healthy foreskin needs removing like a rotten tooth ... blimey. I am sticking with the Polish guys here. In their entirety! Even if we all get balanitis and die ... we're all going to anyhow, however many preventative medical procedures we have ...

Have as nice a day as one can have, given our mortal circumstances ...

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


I still feel that likening the removal of the foreskin to having a bad tooth removed (forget the wisdom teeth - of course I know they go for a number of reasons, not just decay) - and likening the Polish attachment to the foreskin as a 'superstition', and their 'refusal' to listen to good advice a 'bad habit' - is a very loaded way of talking about this ... and, as someone else said, it isn't just Poland - this is how Europeans generally view the subject.

I think what you are saying is that it is backwards and verging on the dangerous not to see the facts for what they are and oblige families to have this done as routine. Which is fine. That is your opinion, and it is a reasonable one. I think the issue, though, is to do with cultural practice - the business of circumcision is heavily allied to certain cultures, and has been almost forever ... see, for example, Shakespeare, where Othello talks of how he had an altercation with with 'Turk' once, and 'took by the throat / The circumcised dog, and smote him, thus ...' .

These sensitivities are probably the most interesting part of the discussion as far as the Polish angle is concerned.

My comment that I prefer the natural version is simply that - a comment. There are lots of things that it would be more sensible for me to do, but sometimes one has to express one's unfettered appreciation of something beautiful. At the risk of sharing too much, I think the operation of the foreskin is poetry in motion, and it makes me sad to think of that being interrupted. But you're right - probably much more sensible to chop it off. Actually, my brother is one of those very adults you speak of, who opted to have it removed due to problems, and is glad he did - but perhaps the important thing here is that is was his choice, as an adult. To be fair, babies and small boys aren't given the choice. Which is why in a previous comment I suggested the fairest thing might be for only 18+ men to do this, of their own free will. Hopefully they wouldn't have been excessively sexually active before this point, and given lots of women cervical cancer.

And my comment about how nice a day one can have, given our mortal limitation, wasn't sarcastic, actually. It was another pretty sad reflection. To be honest, not sure whether I'd rather have more time, and no foreskins in the world, or less time, and foreskins. It all adds up to the same in the end. We have a time limit. I guess up to us what we do within the time.

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]

I'm sure Dodgefan might have something clinical and appropriate.

Actually, Urszula is right: why bother with just chopping the end off - why not the whole lot? Problem then totally solved!

Dodgefan? Is that not an indisputable argument? Is that not the absolutely safest way to ensure none of us ever have any medical problems or illnesses or anything unpleasant as a result of contact with such a thing? Given that your argument for circumcision is that the foreskin causes problems, would not so many more problems be solved by total removal of the entire item??

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


Are you crazy?

How many of the 10 women are going to prefer the one with the sleeve that covers the end UNTIL the (great) moment when the end decides to come out ... and then the fun begins. And afterwards, it goes nicely back into its (specially designed, protective, neat, tidy) cover, until required for use again.

as opposed to ...

one that is always out, always naked, regardless of whether it wants to be or not, and can never reveal itself, or retreat, as that option, and mystery, has all been taken away from it.

And one that has (by all accounts) a jagged ridge of scar tissue all around it. Wounded.

It is designed to come out when it is ready, and go back when it is done. Simple. Effective. Cool.

Even if I was 1 out of 10, I wouldn't care.
But I don't think I would be.

Life / Why is circumcision not practiced in Poland? [701]


Well done. You noticed : )


Gosh, am I Catholic, then? Nobody ever told me (especially not the priest who christened me C of E).

Dogma ... there is also such a thing as medical dogma.


To be honest, I think this is surely only someone who has experience of being both uncircumcised and then circumcised can then comment on.

Dodgefan, you are getting yourself very worked up about this. You are adamant that you are right. You think anybody who thinks otherwise has absolutely no grounds whatsoever for their opinion. You won't accept that there is anything to be said for keeping something natural, that a baby has no choice, that there is any possibility that a foreskin could have benefits or a purpose at all apart from making people ill or dirty, or that we all might like foreskins not because of any religious doctrine, but because we thing it is horrific to cut it off a little baby and then for a guy forever to spend his life having to justify why he hasn't got what he was given ... why he has never ever had the experience of a foreskin. So I guess we all just have to beg to differ.


... but do listen to Modafinil, because he is a voice of reason (regardless of his religious affiliation or nationality).