Is/was Polish society patriarchal or matriarchal?

Every Pole is a proud Patriarch, of course. No other way for a real man. We are kings and rules on the universe.

As long as our wives don't know about it, that is.

Polish society in my view is very macho. Oh yes, letting women get into the elevator first... carrying bags...the usual stuff.
But when it comes to top positions in business and political life...
Why our society is supposed to be patriarchal? And why marriage is essential? In my native Flanders very soon the majority of couples will live together without being married. They have children, educate them, teach them values, grow old together as happy as any couple who is married.

It is both.

What's wrong with marriage anyway? What are the perks of living together without being married? Does getting married causes any harm?

Women rule over vodka distribution and males over housework.

I think women in Polish society likes often dominating man. It's natural for me. A man who is a bit weak (who doesn't like to hide his emotions, who is not afraid to show that he also cries from time to time) and a bit strong, is an ideal person. A perfect mix is needed for a wonderful partner or husband. Somebody who can say : "I want it" with a tap but who will also listen to his woman opinion.