Life / Is Poland hostile to supporting families and stay united? DNA test. [11]

Thanks for the advice but for me marriage is intrinsically too risky an endeavour so I'll pass, I still think that a family can be full fledged even without a piece of paper

Life / Is Poland hostile to supporting families and stay united? DNA test. [11]

That would be great, but the real question is can a judge establish paternity based on OTHER factors besides a DNA test? I heard of some cases where men via chat admitted to something and paternity was established without a DNA test, now I'm trying to separate rumours from legal advice

Life / Is Poland hostile to supporting families and stay united? DNA test. [11]

Money is not a problem, the logistical problem is if a couple is unmarried and doesn't cohabitate, or even if they cohabitate but conflict arises, once the baby is born the mother can refuse to make you get a swab of the baby or can go to her parents and you won't be able to test the baby, so how do you actually take the test in case of uncooperativeness?

Life / Is Poland hostile to supporting families and stay united? DNA test. [11]

I would love to, if the practice is like the theory yes absolutely. DNA then sign the BC. But my question is how does it REALLY work in the case one parent (the mother) behaves obstructively?

Life / Is Poland hostile to supporting families and stay united? DNA test. [11]

Thanks a lot for your reply!
This is what I mean, but the system automatically flags me for spam. Please read it cause it's a bit lengthy or mods please allow me to articulate:

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Hi all,

I moved to Poland several years ago because in my eyes Poland is absolutely the best EU country with the perfect mix of progressivism and traditionalism, as well as it being - in my estimation - the best country to raise a family in. I come from another (broken) EU country somewhere West of Poland and let me tell you the environment is HOSTILE towards creating families that stay united, but one still can make the most of what he can by planning ahead.

Disclaimer: I am not married, nor do I have any stable relationship or some significant other I'm planning to have kids with, this is just something abstract topic and I'd like to keep it as accurate in legal terms rather than starting a moral discussion about what the law should be like, or shouldn't for that matter.

What I know is that in Poland, as well as elsewhere, the legal presumption for a husband is to be the father of any kid born within the marriage unless proven otherwise. What I also know is that cohabitation means nothing and that is in my opinion an option for all those people who want to start families without the yoke of the State being ever present.
BUT - and here's the kicker - just because a husband is presumed to be the father, doesn't mean that a non-husband is presumed not to, from what I know (I might be wrong) paternity in Poland can be established even without a DNA test (for instance Whatsapp messages in which you CONTEMPLATED the POSSIBILITY of being the father) and that quite frankly is the reason why my house of cards collapsed.

My intention writing this is to see if there's a way to be certain to obtain a DNA test. I believe that a man should sacrifice for the sake of his kid but ONLY if it's HIS kid.
I've worked hard to build the necessary conditions to raise a family (career, bought an apartment and have no mortgage, have savings) but things like this make me think that Poland is slightly more protective than other EU countries but only so much so.

I will certainly try the open communication route and clarify my expectations from the beginning of a future relationship, as I always do, but I'm experienced enough to know that if a partner agrees with taking a DNA test after the birth and then "changes her mind" I would functionally be f'd.

It happened so many times that a partner used a Trojan Horse strategy "yes don't worry we're just FWB, stop asking all the time" then fast forward some years and it's not "bBbbBut i LoVe YoU!1!111!! I wAnNa HAvE kiDs WitcHoO".

But one thing is a relationship breaking apart, another one is when kids are there. It's also no mystery that courts favour the mother so the good ol' switcheroo is such an effective tactic, there's basically no counter to it.

So is there a way, contractual or not, to protect a man who wants to sign a birth certificate ONLY if a DNA test shows he's the father? Besides, how can a man test a kid if the mother suddenly behaves obstructively and non cooperatively? Sounds to me like he can't and at that point you're at the mercy of the court.

I'm paranoid, my stupid country doesn't offer sufficient guarantees in terms of establishing paternity, thought that Poland was better (and it really is) but there's a cap to how much protection one can have. If 2 partners agree on taking a DNA test at birth and then the mother chooses otherwise, is there a bulletproof way of getting it from the court or are they the ultimate arbiters of that?