Countries in Europe where abortion is allowed/not allowed?

I agree with this, because your already going thru some difficult changes, and
my opinion "takes two " and its not all your doing. you wanted the baby, but giving
the situation as it was, he had enough to take care of the baby, so the thinking
part should have also been more so on his part and he should have told you from
the start of the relationship that he didnt want kids so soon, and kept his restraint
or used a condom !

so he was irresponsible in that by not communicating with you this upfront before
you had intercourse, and by the post, you both living together , how would this
not happen if you are both happy ,living together, and commited to each other in
that sense?

he knew the risk ,and so did you, but again, bringing up in another post, when
you think you know someone, you truely dont, people change, or dont always
tell you what is on their mind, and can fool you for a while till its too late, so
I do sympathize with your loss, and only wish and hope that you can move on
because it was a very hard thing to do , and given your situation, hope that you
have healed.

Its easy for people to say " I told you so" but, when its you in that situation, I
really dont think anyone wants to hear that, we should all take this as a learning
tool and hope for the best for those who are willing to share that part of their
lives.


we all have had our time, so dont judge yourself so harshly, just try to move on
and dont let anything hold you back from your goals that you set aside for yourself.

The one you have to look out for most is you!

I have a 9 yr old daughter and i am a single parent since i was 3mths into my pregnancy ... my daughter's father doesnt even care she exists and has never had anything to do with her and have any involvement in her life.

My daughter may be 9 but her understanding is her daddy simply didnt love her enough to want to be with her and see her grow up.

But in connection with your quoted bit Guest ... i felt hopeless but i wouldnt changed it for the world :)

"I see you waited 20 weeks the second time, that's just irrisponsible!!! as for your mental health you made your choice, live with it there is nothing you can do to change what you did. " Amaythst

Jesus christ, Ama you need to shut your mouth before you slate people so quickly.
So much for helping and trying to understand. You just showed your true colours nice one. At least others reading this will see just how much of "thoughtful" person you are. You should apologies, and think before you speak.

To guest.

I think you are very brave to volunteer such personnal information online, I realise you have anonimity , however, I think your imput is infinately more value able than most others opinions. Did people know here that Abortion is illegal in ElSalvador and infact there are special foresensic police teams that investigate illegal abortions and women found to have had an abortion can and are sent to prison for LIFE. 25 years!!!!!!!!!!!

If you think I'm joking check it out google the subject.

Abortion is a weapon which the male dominated elites can have control of women physically and mentally. No one has any right to dictatate what a person wants to do with their body, short of those who are mentally ill and may harm themselves.

The age old question of when is a foetus no longer just cells but a human is exceptionally contentious. Those who seek to call the moral high ground and dictate are often firstly MEN, and secondly MEN of religion.

Since religion is inherently evil, by design, i.e the tricking of the masses into the servitude on nothing, then therefore by said rational to dictate that "God's will" is to preserve all life is also a lie.

Humans are simple creature overly controlled by the emotions, more than by reason and intellect (as often shown on this forum). Logic and reason take second place to coloured emotions.

Once again to Guest who volunteered her story, thanks and I hope others appreciate the courage of her posts. To the ignorant and dumb, may you wake up and learn more of others, that way you might learn more of yourself.

I said what I thought, so you know how far gone 20 weeks is, considering a friend of mine had her daughter at 27 weeks it is a stupid thing to do....and as for her being so brave telling the forum - she did it under GUEST i see nothing brave about that.

And since you know nothing about me you can shut your mouth.

Amathyst, I've read many of your posts and you do not come across as a particularly nice person. Hence my comments. You do however, enjoy being the center of attention.

Infact come to think of it I'm nearly always irritated by you judgemental, little Englander mentality. You offend many people, and yet you see yourself as some sort of blameless woman of the world. its tiresome and boring to read between the lines of your babbling posts. No doubt you will be bubbling with anger and wish to tell me to shut up and etc etc.

But what else is there to expect from a you. I realise I'm not the only one to have touched on this subject so I'm not alone in my (dim) views of you.

And just because the person entered under guest and did not identify herself means nothing, just volunteering the information is brave. But being brave is not something you would know about, because you are a bully and like to dominate and dictate.

Once you have had a long hard deep look inside yourself, you might drop the flirty, look at me routine and open up. Actually if I visualise you I see Jade goody.

Giles, like I said, you know nothing about me, because I chose not to come on a forum and divulge my personal problems or life history.....I have an open mind and have in fact a very good education and outlook on life so no, I am not at all like Jade Goody, as for my Little Englander mentality, I dont think so since I have been brought up in a very liberal household and given the opportunities to chose for myself what I think of other poeple...As for taking a deep look inside myself, I did that many years ago and my mantrar is "its nice to be nice"....Like I have said you know nothing about me, but you have taken it upon yourself to jump on my because I made comments, if you read my earlier comments you will see that the women on the board found them positive...you're a man what do you know about this subject anyway, since you will never have to go through the humiliation and the mental torture....

I'm never offended by things she says. Some people's beliefs may be harsh. It's not her fault if you're sensitive.

"its nice to be nice"....

Then why were you so mean?

Im not mean, do you realise that a woman knows that she is pregnant at about 3 weeks???? in the UK abortion can be done by tablet up to 8 weeks which is preferred because there is less damange to the uterus and no need for a anaesthesic, do you realise the problems in surgery?? I am in no way condeming women for having abortions, but 20 weeks thats practically giving birth and irrisponible and stupid from a health point of view

irrisponible.

Irresponsible.

Oh, let it go Giles and A - you both made your points:)
Now you are are being picky.......

I had an abortion at 20 weeks because I really really wanted the baby and I did not want the abortion! I didn't hide for 20 weeks and pretend it wasn't happening, I was actively trying to sort my life out so I could have the baby. I was talking to the father of the baby, I was reasoning with him and I was applying for maternity allowance/benefit as I did not have any savings and I was in debt. I was a student.

What I did was stupid because I should have just had the baby and if the father still didn;t want to know, I should have moved out and gone back to my mum and dad (although they were in a different country then but we have planes in this day and age etc.) It may have been hard for a year, couple of years but I would have made it and my baby would have been fine.

The father of the child never once said "you must have an abortion" but he pressurised me in other ways, by showing his displeasure, impatience at me not sorting it out.

The main problem I was not mature enough to tell him, I am having the baby and that's it. I bent to the pressure. He was 31 he was old enough to be a dad, that's for sure.

He tried to tell me it's not a baby and would not refer to it as a baby but as a foetus.
I really looked after myself and ate well, I wanted this baby to be healthy.

If he said to me : I don't want this baby but I will lend you some money until you get back on your feet I would have taken it and paid him back every penny.

I told you before I think I made a big mistake and I posted because I thought it was important for other women to know.

Today I heard on the radio, that some woman MP is pro-choice and is determined to make abortion easier. I can tell you that's rubbish.

Abortion in the UK is extremely easy. You got to a clinic or doctor. Two doctors signed that they saw you and you agree to an abortion and they make a phone call to book you in. 1 week/2 weeks later you have the abortion. It's simple. There is no need to make it any easier for women. What is needed is support and education.

Giles, you're a man, Im not even going to get annoyed with you since you will never understand about this subject.

M, I understand your interjection but Mr M is trying to see a point of view that he will never fully understand and he also seems to think he knows me, judging by his comments, which are flawed

Yes, and in my opinion 20 weeks is way to far into the pregnancy for an abortion. This shouldn't be allowed just because of the horrible process to remove it.

I'm sorry you had to do that.

No you right Amathyst, i'm going to avoid threads in which your are participating. Since I'm a man and know nothing.

That's all you man :)

She just said your comments are flawed.

don't be such a baby G:)

I'm going because i'm losing my temper and don't want to become offensive.
But she really gets my on my nerves.
Two people who's posts I enjoy and respect Pat19 and Frank have both been at logger heads with this woman. So clearly its not just me that finds her to be offensive, overbearing, judgemental, crass, stupid and a bully.

WHATEVER.

20 weeks is late but it is legal until 24 weeks. \

We discussed adoption and he was quite keen on that but I knew I could never give my baby up for adoption.

Oh yeah, and the reason I could not get any benefit whatsoever not even 10p was because I was living with the father of the child so he was expected to support me financially. I was working full time at the time but was worried about the period when I stop working. What what I live on? I wasn't even sure I wouldn't end up on the street with the baby and I didn't want that.

You know, Amathyst, I am not trying to be brave, I am not the same woman. I am now a lot smarter, and older. OK I posted as Guest but you are also anonymous, I mean Amathyst is not your real name is it? Noone knows who you really are or where you live.

Giles and everyone else - thanks for understanding. I just wish someone will benefit from my story.

exactly...Whatever :)

22 weeks is the max in the uk, but that is usually reserved for women with women who have been told that they have defects....tests take time

But I have to say I am in no way condeming abortion....women have that right and it should be done in a responsible way.

Legal vs. Moral :)

Abortion in my opinion is ok up to 8 weeks. I think that once you have to dismember the body using a scalpel or cord then vaccuum out..it becomes immoral. Just my opinion.

I hope that someone does learn from this story.

Abortion should be banned everywhere

you are allowed to make your own jugdement G, no need to look for allies here


I have seen you bullying other people on this forum before, so you are not without fault either. Does Decorator or Lef rings the bell?

Care to elaborate a little? Maybe ..why?

So tell me what situations have you been in, im interested

What kind of tests take so long?

Some facts for you: a baby's heartbeat is detectable at 6 weeks.

What kind of defects do you think make a baby not good enough to be born?

Yup. Decorator and I have no qualms now. And Lef's Australian, he relishes the wind up, thats what he does for fun. (Although initially I may have missed the point), If I didn't disagree or wind Lef up he'd call me a poof.

I'm not looking for allies, I'm merely pointing out whats already written.
And why are you jumping in on her side anyway, wtf has it got to do with you.

You know what, thats it. Finally I've had a road to Damascus momment, I've seen the light. Actually what the f am I doing here. Why am I wasting my time.

All people do is judge, judge, judge, judge, me too now i'm being sucked into this stupid cyber reality with other Kunts.

no offence, but my brother and his wife were in that situation for 2 weeks over xmas and it made the xmas hell for the family they had certain tests and being a mother of certain age you have those test...so

You mean amniocentosis to exclude Down's Syndrome.

You can have a Down's baby whatever your age, it's just statistically more likely the older the mother.

Personally, I don't think Down's Syndrome is a good enough reason to end a pregnancy but that's my own opinion. So personally I would not even have that test.