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Posts by Syrena_04  

Joined: 20 Oct 2006 / Female ♀
Last Post: 1 Jan 2007
Threads: Total: 2 / In This Archive: 2
Posts: Total: 88 / In This Archive: 75
From: Canada
Interests: I'm 48 yrs old. Reading, social advocacy, tennis

Displayed posts: 77 / page 2 of 3
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Syrena_04   
23 Nov 2006
Love / I'm upset - you encourage foreigners to take the Polish women away [94]

once the heart's broken, there is nothing left to break

I don't know what to say to this. This is a beautiful message, Huegel. Thanks. I might e-mail this week-end. If you change your mind about going first, go ahead.

BTW, have you read my Intro?

Take care.
Syrena_04   
25 Nov 2006
Language / Polish Language Pronunciation - Example Words and Phrases [178]

"Małgorzata" and "Małgosia"

Can you tell me how to pronounce both of those names with correct Polish pronunciation?

Hi Blissfl,

I am taking Polish lessons and I will attempt an answer but I am hoping that Krysia or another Polish speaker has a chance to correct me if I'm wrong. Using English as a comparison:

Małgorzata = Mau-go-ja-ta (Mau pronounced like the Mau in Maui)

Małgosia = Mau-go-sha
Syrena_04   
26 Nov 2006
Love / Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]

This is a follow-up to a conversation started in the 'Miranda' thread, in Introductions. Please refer to it for additional context.

What bothers me is that children, mostly girls, along with young boys, are used as sex toys for sex tourists.

What also bothers me is that some women are taught to believe that they have no value unless they belong to a man. And even then.

That some women are still used as chattel.

That some women are also taught to believe that what they think, need and believe is of no importance. That in some cases, being a woman does not mean anything at all.

And that that teaching is done, often, by women themselves.

I'm not trying to complain about my own personal situation, but I am indignant about human rights abuse of all kinds.

And another thing:

Up until recently, most medical research has used men only in study groups. Women's physiology was assumed to be the same and to react in the same fashion. What a surprise (!) that recently, heart attack symptoms were understood to be different in men and in women.

And I resent being taught that men are weak, that allowances have to be made for their lack of this or of that. That a woman has to tend to such fragile egos and make up the difference. This is an insult to both sexes.

And I pity the priest of any denomination who will attempt to give permission to a man, on my behalf, to kiss me. The 'You may kiss the bride' will only be said by me !

It does not mean that a woman won't cook, clean, do laundry. It just means that she's not an empty shell.

I've got to stop now. This is getting to me.
Syrena_04   
26 Nov 2006
Love / Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]

Frank, you raised a number of good points:

Men/women have different "value" systems....do the females on the board feel that their worth is now to be measured solely by a male originated system....ie money?

I'm not sure what you mean by different values for men and for women. Could you expand on this please? For me, the issue is access to the market economy, if it is desired, and to the financial resources that will facilitate self-determination and even more importantly basic survival in some cases. Money does not equal self-worth. It might equal power and influence in the eyes of others, but not self-worth.

its a genetic insitinctive thing

Again, I'd like to clarify. Are you saying that motherhood is a genetic instinctive behaviour? I would agree that, physiologically, women are better equipped to help with the survival of the offsprings. In many women, there is also a 'mothering' behaviour that translates into nurturing, loving and protecting but I would disagree that this behaviour is universally present in women. Which portion of it is genetically-derived or learned is difficult to determine. But it is not, in my view, a universal genetic instinctive behaviour trait.

I am not saying that male originated systems are to be rejected. What discourages me is that so many people, men and women, have tried so hard for so long to make this world a better place over the years, and it seems as if hardly a dent has been made.
Syrena_04   
27 Nov 2006
Love / Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]

Wolfie...have you been neutered...or are you a wannabee neutee?

This is actually a good example of what happens in the pack when one of its members expresses a dissenting point of view. Some of the pack members will mock, threaten, ostracize him for it. It takes courage to stand up to the pack.

I am sorry Syrena that I have started the tread first -

That's ok, Miranda. I did say I wouldn't create one, then changed my mind. :)

This topic has really upset me. (Not the posts - although I kept watching the sky for a mushroom cloud).

Each sex has different strengths and weaknesses, nature intended this way, why should we try to second guess mother nature???!!

I agree. Men and women complement each other in many wonderful ways. And it is not about the condition of women in Europe and in North America that concerns me the most. Although (and keep in mind that I am in a different generational group) it was not that long ago that things started to change even there.

I rather like what we call here the 'Old World charm', for ex., having the door opened for me, having my escort pick up the tab, men who stand when a woman enters the room (no jokes here please). When these actions are accompanied by true respect, this is a beautiful world.

If everyone agrees, let's close this thread. Oh no, we're still waiting for Matyjasz.
Syrena_04   
27 Nov 2006
Life / Are there any neutral or positive stereotypes of poles? [40]

Have you ever heard of 'Old World charm'? Polish men and women are the best example.

Highly intelligent.

Resilient and courageous.

But I don't suppose you know what I'm talking about, do you.
Syrena_04   
28 Nov 2006
Love / Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]

This is actually a good example of what happens in the pack when one of its members expresses a dissenting point of view. Some of the pack members will mock, threaten, ostracize him for it. It takes courage to stand up to the pack.

I should try to explain what I meant. I don’t mean to be this longwinded but I’m afraid this is me.

Human societies organize themselves in various kinds of groups, both formal and informal such as countries, races, genders, rich, poors, cities, families, groups of friends, cyber-forums, etc. The ‘alpha male or female’ is the leader of such a group. This model of organization also exists in animals such as wolfes, chimpazees and possibly many others. When one of the members of such a group challenges the beliefs of the others, or the beliefs held by the group as a whole, and upheld by the ‘alpha’, the other members will try to protect the ‘alpha’ and themselves by discrediting the dissenting member. The more threatening the challenge, the more severe the reaction will be from the group. It can go from mockery, to insults, to threats, to duels, to isolation. For example, a threat to a ruling king would probably mean a death sentence to the challenger. A threat to a world view such as the one Galileo and Copernicus voiced had similar dire consequences for at least Galileo (I don’t know what happened to Copernicus).

Similarly, when a person adopts a position that goes against what the other members of that group think , that person will more than likely face a similar reaction, (mockery, insults, threats, duels, isolation).

Protecting, or siding, with women is often viewed as a challenge to men’s authority over women. Therefore, men will often react by mocking the man who sides with women. They might tease him by asking who wears the pants in his house, or by asking if he has been neutered, therefore attacking his masculinity, his virility and his ability to rule a woman. In certain groups, the ‘punishment’ might be much worst.

So, the ‘pack’ I referred to in this case = whoever believes that women are not equal to men as persons.

The dissenting member = Wolfie’s comment that women are equals.

The ‘punishment’ = the joke about him being neutered.
Syrena_04   
28 Nov 2006
Love / Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]

Gee thanks Miranda. I may not post every day (I have to work long hours this week) but I'm not forgetting the thread. I have more to say. I'm really glad that people are posting; we can discuss and share points of views. I am really enjoying this. Cheers and take care.
Syrena_04   
29 Nov 2006
Love / Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]

I wish I had not used your joke to illustrate my argument. I was trying to illustrate my argument, and I forgot how it might affect you, Frank. I can sometimes get lost in my ideas and forget the impact on people. I did not mean to express any disrespect towards your opinion. And I don't agree with the insults you are getting. I do feel responsible for what is happening.
Syrena_04   
11 Dec 2006
Love / Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]

I would tell him - Your ass is not bad too...Can you show me more?

I wish I had that spunk. :)

feminism...hmmm....don't get started

I found your posts very interesting. It sounds as if the pendulum has swung to the other end. Reverse discrimination is not any better.

I thaught that the subject has exhausted itself.

I know I had said I would return to this topic but somehow, I couldn't. Sorry Miranda. Perhaps later. We never heard from Matyjasz. Too bad. I usually enjoy his posts very much.
Syrena_04   
11 Dec 2006
Travel / Snowboarding in Poland [75]

That's global warming for you. London, Ontario, had 40 cm on Friday. :)
Syrena_04   
11 Dec 2006
Travel / Snowboarding in Poland [75]

dark... very very dark... But only until Dec. 21. Then, not so dark anymore :)
Syrena_04   
11 Dec 2006
USA, Canada / How attractive is Canada for Polish men and women? [23]

But I think due to the nice Canadian nature Poles like it.

:) I had understood it to be 'the nice nature of Canadians' but I see my bias is showing. :) Flora and fauna is quite nice too, yes.

It seems strange to me that people have not gotten used to the snowy conditions by now.

I wonder if that might be because you're in Toronto. Toronto hardly ever gets any serious snowfalls. People are not used to driving in it. Plus, the melting snow can be more slippery than a good 10 cm of it. Do you think that might be the case?

which a lot of people are simply scared off here.

You've noticed this? Really? There are more automatic cars here than in Europe, or so I am told, but I assumed it was because the US had flooded the market for so long. Scared? Hmmmmm, interesting.
Syrena_04   
11 Dec 2006
Travel / Snowboarding in Poland [75]

I'm afraid it's a sign of things to come, unfortunately. :(
Syrena_04   
12 Dec 2006
USA, Canada / How attractive is Canada for Polish men and women? [23]

canada.gc.ca/acanada/ViewCategory.htm?lang=eng&font=0

and

canada.gc.ca/depts/major/depind_e.html#T

for those of you who wish additional information. I find these sites too wordy for my taste but they can be interesting.
Syrena_04   
17 Dec 2006
Life / Polish people have low self-esteem? [80]

I would venture that low self-esteem comes in a variety of shapes and forms. Some visibly appear to feel inferior, others will readily admit to it; others still, as Krysia pointed out, will act it out in various ways. I thought that this was how low self-esteem manifested itself. However, recently, I have come across another way with which some people deal with low self-esteem. I call it 'image management' ('over-reaching' is another form but it is different from 'image management'). Image management means that the person looks and sounds self-assured, successful, and capable when in fact, all one has to do is scratch the surface a tad more to reveal a deep well of insecurities. I have come to know what the expression 'the bigger they are, the harder they fall' means. All this to say that many persons whom you would never suspect of having low self-esteem do. The trick is to manage your image so that it does not show. I for one prefer more genuine people who will admit their fears and insecurities as well as their strengths. But, at least in many aspects of my personal and professional world, one risks way too much for being that authentic. Too bad. So, intimidating people are perhaps nothing to be intimidated about. :)
Syrena_04   
17 Dec 2006
Life / Polish people have low self-esteem? [80]

the ice queen

This often happens to me, too. When people get to know me, and (I have to admit) when I feel comfortable enough to 'let my hair down' (because I am terribly shy), people get to see another side of me. But that takes time.

Honesty often isolates but only ones trying honesty would know about it.
I am such a great guy that I would never intimidate someone showing his weak side (at least consiously) but I've seen sharks eating flesh out of such people and had my share of performing in defesnive mode afterward.

Yes. I have to agree with that. I think that healthy self-esteem is the greatest gift one can have. And those who do not have good self-esteem deserve respect and protection.

"bully"

That reminds me of a discussion we had in one of my 'psychology of self' class. Someone said something along the lines that one had to deserve respect in order to get it. And someone else replied that, instead, our behaviour is under our own control. Basically, that I can choose to respect someone even if they are behaving in a disrespectful way towards themselves. A person whose behaviour is inviting disrespect does not force me to behave in a disrespectful manner towards them. I am the one who controls my behaviour. And my behaviour can stem from my values, not from another's behaviour. Easier said than done, but still. Anyway, I said I was going to be here for an hour only to take advantage of the nice weather outside. So, I will leave now but this is a very interesting discussion. Thank you all and take care.