Love /
Feminism effects both sexes in a different way - opinions? [115]
but really patrycja, I don't know where you live, or how old you are, but around here, you'll find no guy - my age, older men I don't know - who says you belong in the kitchen
I live in the USA, and I am 40.
MY very first relationship was with a 28 year old, I was 18.
we didnt have any children together, I moved out to live with him (stupid) and his
three kids.
for the first 5 years of my young adulthood I cooked, Cleaned, and took care of his
kids. after 5 years and going no where, but playing house, I snapped!
packed up my clothes sucked in my pride and moved back home.
Oops and took my cat "mischief" back with me too.
only thing good that I had out of that relationship was the fact that his children
loved me and said to this day, i was the best mom they ever had, he went thru
a few more "moms" for his kids, and he still is a sad case.
During that relationship, I could not work "cause who would care for the kids"?
it was like I was a ready made mom stuck. why I let it happen so long, well I guess
cause his children needed me more then their dad who was never around.
So why do women get to be the way they are? "experiences" what dont kill us only
makes us stronger type.
Heres an Example of a complete idiot of a father: I went to my moms to get food, because he used all the food stamps that he got from the state to buy drugs.
I didnt know he did this, he said he would come home in a while, well that led
to coming home at 3 am in the morning when we were all sleeping.
my mom had made some nice lasagna dinner, so we took it home, well later on
the piece that she gave to my ex-boyfriend, we all ate it, cause all of us were hungry
so I promised them I would go back to Grandmas in the morn for more. and that
their dad would be home soon.
so he comes in all drugged up on Whatever it was, like a madman, pulls me out of
bed by my hair, and asked me where his food was? while yelling at me and calling
me all kinds of names, wakes the kids, I am not a good person to wake up.
So as hes doing all this, I grabbed my hair out of his hands, push him back a few feet
and came at him with the same force!
now, how on earth can this be justified? it cant, there was no excuse for his behavior
to drag me out of bed for food that he couldnt provide.
and this isnt one person, there is more like him out there.
going back to my posts on why I hate skinheads. these guys act like women are
their slaves. she has to cook, clean, wipe his arse, etc etc the list goes on.
she cant see her family ,she cant do any work outside the home unless he says so
type guys who make me sick.
The only things I can say is, Arien, its good to know that Men are doing their fair
share, because the theory of "Im getting married, so now I dont have to do it"
is all Wrong "not saying you said that" but alot of men do get this impression that
once they marry, they dont have to wash their own things anymore.
and I do hear that alot of men say that they want a Polish wife because they
cook good, and take care of the house good, well this is true, but, this is 2006
and most women and men have to work -both to keep their home stable.
so whether she s polish , english, southern, whatever- the bottom line is, its
a two sided relationship and both have to work together at it.
This is how I feel personally.
but really patrycja, I don't know where you live, or how old you are, but around here, you'll find no guy - my age, older men I don't know - who says you belong in the kitchen?
Another thing I might want to add to this is, maybe in europe things might be
different. I know that one of the girls I work with, she married a English gentleman
and says she dont know what she would do without him.
she says he helps with her son, hes a hard worker, he does the housework when
he is off work, not that their home is messy, but he keeps it straightened.
he supports her in everything. as she does him, and she did live in the UK for little
over a year, and said it was hard to adjust. she wanted to come back to the
US and so he stayed there till his paperwork was all set 13 months! and he moved
here to the united states and he loves it.
both are very happy and she says, oh we will go see his family as much as possible,
so this might be why I think that way about europe.
I do agree, there is more respect in some cultures then in others.
and many are taught to learn to fend for themselfs. <~something every mother
should teach.