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how can i get him to fall in love with me again?


Blingin 5 | 52  
3 Dec 2007 /  #1
me and my polish boyfriend have been together for nearly a year now, at first he was so nice, caring, wonderful and commited, and at one time he used to love me before i loved him.

now, months down the line, he says i call him too much, want to see him too much, and that he cant breathe, i mean, i love the damn guy, i just want to care for him and be with him all the time, hes my man, but he doesnt show me that side he had anymore, was it real?

hes sweet sometimes but he doesnt understand me, he thinks hes right all the time, and he treats me cruel like im a piece of dirt. i love him but i cant take anymore of him treating me like im his stalker, he says he wants me to give him space. what have i done wrong?

how do i get him to feel the same way i do, any tricks, what makes a man fall in love with you, truly, madly and deeply, thats what i want. no magic rubbish, i mean things like making him miss me more, buying gifts, stuff like that. HELP!!!!!!!!
PinkJewel  
3 Dec 2007 /  #2
I'm sorry to say but I think this is his "not very tactful" way of saying he no longer wishes to be with you.

I think you should think about what you've written, if he's treating you like dirt then he doesn't respect you any longer and is there a point in being in a situation where you aren't respected?

He's being rude and arrogant to you, he might not want to be but it might be the only way he knows of trying to end things with you.

I think you should end it with him...if he truly loves you, he'll miss you and he'll return and you can work from there. If he doesn't come back then you'll know you did the right thing and that the relationship was going no where...then you can move on...

Good luck.
slick77 - | 127  
3 Dec 2007 /  #3
what have i done wrong?

Probably nothing.

how do i get him to feel the same way i do,

Sorry to say but you can't do that.

Have you tired talking to him about that?
marek s - | 269  
3 Dec 2007 /  #4
ever think you maybe smothered the guy?
people do like space and dont need to be with their partner all the time.
insecurity is one of the fastest ways to kill a relationship
Lucynda 4 | 70  
4 Dec 2007 /  #5
You've got to pull back, hon, and give him his space.

After all, true love is giving the other person what they need. And he's told you what he needs -- space! So give it to him if you really love him.

Men like to chase -- it's part of their hunting nature. Some men are more clingy than others, but all of them want to be the one to pursue you, and they have their ways of doing it. My Polish boyfriend initially would not give me his phone number, and insisted that he be the one to call me -- and I accepted this because I know what men are like. No matter that he is very affectionate, passionate, and tells me "kochanie" the whole time, he wants to be the one to set the tone of the relationship, and I let him, because I'm a woman and he's a man.

I think there's hope for your relationship because your man is telling you what he wants -- if he hated you, he would run away.

My advice: go out and buy some new clothes, change your look, go out dancing and make your boyfriend jealous. Let him see other men flirting and dancing with you -- he'll start to love you again. Trust me -- this works!
krysia 23 | 3,057  
4 Dec 2007 /  #6
My advice: go out and buy some new clothes, change your look, go out dancing and make your boyfriend jealous. Let him see other men flirting and dancing with you -- he'll start to love you again. Trust me -- this works!

I agree with the first part, because you will gain more self-confidence when you look good, and after all you are your own best friend and you must believe in yourself.

But if he has no feelings left for you, I don't know if seeing you dance with another guy will provoke any feelings towards you again. He might have someone else in his life and would be glad to get rid of you. It's hard to say not knowing the situation, but it's worth a try.
plk123 8 | 4,150  
4 Dec 2007 /  #7
move on. you can't make him love you.
Gosiaa 2 | 89  
4 Dec 2007 /  #8
Go Girl ! shopping , new shoes new lipstick even is the best thing

trust me after some time passes you will think "what did I ever see in him !"

Good luck
Foreigner4 12 | 1,769  
4 Dec 2007 /  #9
find real interests beyond shopping^^^

my buddies polish, canadian, british, german will all testify nothing is more attractive in a woman than her having interests and hobbies that transcend the superficial. Active chicks, informed chicks, chicks who are passionate about life- they attract men, they inspire men.
lonely 2 | 97  
4 Dec 2007 /  #10
ever think you maybe smothered the guy?
people do like space and dont need to be with their partner all the time.
insecurity is one of the fastest ways to kill a relationship

Here goes mr feckin happy again!! You bore me sh*tless dude. Go boil your head!

how do i get him to feel the same way i do

This is a very sad one and i really feel for you. Private message me if you want to chat ok?
Hueg - | 320  
4 Dec 2007 /  #11
Trust me -- this works!

The Association for Pushers of the Don't Push Me Button and other Vacuous Undertakings yesterday released the findings of their study into following any advice ending on trust me -- this works. The report concluded that they had found the findings were inconclusive but decided to do it anyway. The report concluded 80% of the participants had experienced feelings of regret.

Good luck Blingin.
Daisy 3 | 1,227  
4 Dec 2007 /  #12
AMAB

.
ShelleyS 14 | 2,893  
4 Dec 2007 /  #13
Dump him, lifes to short to be dicked out..plenty more fish in the sea :)
Jambo 2 | 106  
4 Dec 2007 /  #14
I think you must sit down and have a serious chat with him and tell him what you want from your relationshhip and why it is not working for you now. However be prepared for him not to commit to change or meeting you halfway. If that is the case you have no future together as a couple and you must stop seeing him and move on.
AvJoeUK  
4 Dec 2007 /  #15
he treats me cruel like im a piece of dirt

Some girls like that though, you appear to be one of those as he's clearly got you hook, line and sinker. I apologise for bluntness but I've heard this more times then I care too.
Jambo 2 | 106  
4 Dec 2007 /  #17
I think that telling him that is how he makes you feel maybe a wake up call for him. But you must be prepared to find out this is really how he is, he is not going to change and you must end the realtionship. There are men who primarily enjoy the thrill of the chase and once they capture the woman's heart they move on to chase someone else and forget the woman they have successfully chased.
Hueg - | 320  
4 Dec 2007 /  #18
AMAB

Perquod? That's French for having a Whale of a time apparently. Thought it might be useful. Talking of that I once met a legless Mariner ancient naturally in a Cornish pub. Unhand me you loon he cried as some Chavs pushed his wheelchair out of the door and left him teetering precariously at Portland Bill. Poor chap beside himself with rage then they left him on the cliffs.

move on to chase someone else and forget

Sound Advice. Can I call you Ishmael? :)
Mufasa 19 | 358  
4 Dec 2007 /  #19
my buddies polish, canadian, british, german will all testify nothing is more attractive in a woman than her having interests and hobbies that transcend the superficial. Active chicks, informed chicks, chicks who are passionate about life- they attract men, they inspire men.

at last, some sense from a man. i've only met one guy like that before - he's now my hubby ;)
marek s - | 269  
4 Dec 2007 /  #20
move on. you can't make him love you.

very true
southern 75 | 7,096  
4 Dec 2007 /  #21
I think some black stockings will do the job.

now, months down the line, he says i call him too much, want to see him too much, and that he cant breathe, i mean, i love the damn guy, i just want to care for him and be with him all the time,

You press him a lot.Let the man breathe a little.You put a lot of pressure on him.He will start to hate you.Men need to feel relaxed,not controled over day and night.He needs some space.That he does not like to talk to you every minute does not mean he does not like you.You may think it is a show of love to call him all the time,but for most men it is translated to extra burden.He needs to concentrate on some things and you disrupt his attention.Men cannot concentrate on more than one thing at a time.So if you press him a lot,he will probably fail and then he will blame you.

Let the guy breathe.
plk123 8 | 4,150  
4 Dec 2007 /  #22
I think some black stockings will do the job.

that may awaken his lust but that has nothing to do with love.
marek s - | 269  
4 Dec 2007 /  #23
Dump him, lifes to short to be dicked out..plenty more fish in the sea

i wouldnt say dump him just yet, but in reality he wont change so maybe shelleys is right in saying dump him
miranda  
4 Dec 2007 /  #24
my buddies polish, canadian, british, german will all testify nothing is more attractive in a woman than her having interests and hobbies that transcend the superficial. Active chicks, informed chicks, chicks who are passionate about life- they attract men, they inspire men.

And that applies to men too IMO. There is nothing sexier than a man who is passionate about something besides food/sex/TV/cars ........
plk123 8 | 4,150  
4 Dec 2007 /  #25
There is nothing sexier than a man who is passionate about something besides food/sex/TV/cars ........

is passion for beer cool? :D
miranda  
4 Dec 2007 /  #26
oh, you know what I mean...............
Jambo 2 | 106  
4 Dec 2007 /  #27
I am passionate about music.
plk123 8 | 4,150  
4 Dec 2007 /  #28
oh, you know what I mean...............

i am guessing you're into white horses and shiny metal? lol
miranda  
4 Dec 2007 /  #29
nope, I was commenting on what Foreigner said
anulka24 1 | 5  
4 Dec 2007 /  #30
Pretend if you have to,that you dont care,play hard to get,he will be putty in your hands-dont call him,let him call you,believe me,he will make 1st move

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