Love / I got married to a Polish wife; Polish family advice needed [45]

My wife is not an open type, talking about private things is very difficult for her and still i knew about her family problems long time before we got married... So if your wife didn't tell you earlier it's like "he won't have a choice later". And I think that in fact this is why you should have free choice now, because you hadn't one before and your wife should understand this. She just wasn't honest with you and that's not a good way to start marriage.

Now... Her parents can be in really hard situation, in some regions, at their age getting a job is almost like a miracle, if they don't have good education etc. But still, 40k is a lot of money... If they are taking loans without thinking, they will do it again. You don't get 40k debt living a normal way. And helping family is quite normal (life isn't easy in Poland), but it can't be constant help and not this way "don't ask why, they just need help". If you are not part of the family enough to know why they have problems etc. you shouldn't be the one who's paying too. I quess it would have take them quite a few years to be 40k short if they were responsible, so i quess something is really wrong and you wouln't like to end up giving them money all the time for sure.

(Sorry for my english)

Love / I got married to a Polish wife; Polish family advice needed [45]

It's not cynical and not selfish... It's common sense. There are some things you should know before the marriage... "I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier honey... but I have AIDS... So... now we share ;) ". If he knew about the problems and still decided to do it, it would be somewhat different, don't you think?

Living in Poland i know too well, how some families act. Sitting on their asses, doing nothing and acting proud because their daughter married some "rich" American/etc. and thinking its someones DUTY to send them money...

Look at the situation. They already sold the house to pay their debts (what f****g debts they had, to have to sell the house??). They still live in it of course, not paying i guess... great deal. And again they are 40k short. It doesn't look like a hard situation to me at all. It looks like someone is living at the expense of others and doesn't even try to change that. Why her mom doesn't work at all? She could look after some child, many people need that and gladly hire older women, who know how to take care of the kid. She would get at least 500 zl and it's not a hard work. I guess they get some money too from some institutions etc. I really don't understand why they have so much debts, it's not normal. 240k for the house + 40k now, almost 300k... it's a LOT of money, personally i don't know anyone who would have such insane problems. So I'm guessing money isn't their real problem and it would be good to know what's that really about. If he's right and it's alcohol problem, they will spend the money anyway instead of paying off the loans.

As i wrote earlier, helping the family is good, but it can't cross the line. And you say that parents do much for you, so you owe them. In fact, their parents also did some things for them before, cause its normal. But having kids to pay for you isn't.

Life / What do Poles do for fun? [49]

If she was born in early 70' and spent some time in Poland, then if you go for the music, try what was adviced : Perfect, Dżem, Lady Pank, De mono, Budka suflera, etc. It should really work, don't think what's popular now. That bands are classic and they have some best love and romantic songs ever. And of course it will bring memories of the country and youth... it should be a hit ;) Dinner with candles and music and then maybe just lying on the couch together listenning and hugging, the girl should be in heaven ;) But of course it depends on her character too... not everybody likes the same things, so it's quite hard to give advice not knowing her.

Some good songs:
Perfect - Autobiografia
Dżem - Wechikuł Czasu
Perfect - Kołysanka dla nieznajomej
Perfect - Nie płacz Ewka
Dżem - Czerwony jak cegła
Dżem - Chcę Ci coś opowiedzieć (great love song)
Dżem - Whisky
De mono - Znów jesteś ze mną
Lady Pank - Zawsze tam gdzie Ty (another great love song)
Lady Pank - Zostawcie Titanika
Budka Suflera - Jolka Jolka

There are many more, these are classics, not all love songs, but she shoud get the mood ;) It's just great part of the culture, i might bet she loves them ;)

Life / What people from Poland know about South America? [15]

I live in Poland all my life, so Brazil is quite far away ;) But if I'm asked what I know (or rather think maybe)...

Biiig party in Rio ;) I quess everyone knows that ;) Second catholicism i think? Next comes the sun, fun, soft drinks and happy people ;) Although i think there are many poor people also. Great football players too, and dancers ;) Hot and beautiful girls too ;)

For me it's also sports, cause I'm interested in that. Capoeira, which is very beautiful martial art and I like to watch it. And brasilian ju jitsu, which I practise and like very much :) I don't know how popular it is in Brasil? ;) Also tradition of vale tudo fighting.

That's what I personally think about when i hear "Brasil".

Language / how are you - jak sie masz? (saying hello in Polish conversation) [10]

"Jak sie masz" isn't like saying "Hello", you should use it only if you know that person. It's not something you ask strangers or people older than you or your boss etc ;) It's common among friends, people who are the same age (rather young)... For older people it's better to say "Co slychac?". For people you don't know, you should just say "Czesc" (young ones) or "Dzien dobry" or "Witam" to older people or boss etc. ( and "Witam" is a bit less formal).

And you can ask "Co slychac" to people who you don't know well but still meet them quite often (like let's say somebody you meet at the local grocery for example) but not to people you meet for the first time.

Another way to ask among friends (closest to "What's up" I think) is "Co tam?" and "Czesc" is often switched to "Siemka" or "Siema", but mainly among young people. (short from "Jak sie masz" but meaning nothing more than "Hi").

Language / Understanding Languages [24]

If you now try to say "oczów" you will be corrected. It's not used for a long time, and you better don't do it ;)

"Bardzo mi przykro" is correct and very common. For example: "Naprawdę? Bardzo mi przykro, nie wiedziałem..."

Love / I have met a wonderful Polish woman, but she has a 9 yrs old daughter [66]

Well said JustysiaS. I thought the same. Pathetic guy really... What have his wife done to him so bad, that he thinks about her this way?

I think he's doing this on purpouse, so I would just say... nie karmić trolla ;)

And edditwop... I read about your girlfriend in every topic here... It's really boring now. I don't really know what's that girl doing with you, if she loves her son so much... Probably her husband doesn't even know they are separated and would be very suprised hearing about it ;) Maybe you don't know but in Poland taking a child from the mother is almost impossible. Even if she was somewhat crazy and a bad mother and he was the best father in the world, the judge would still probably give the child to her... And what would the people in her village talk about if they are already separated? You giving any money to her? Helping her in some ways? Giving her place to live or what?

Life / Polish Divorce laws and stigma attached to it [21]

Eddiewop I already wrote you about that. It is almost impossible for a man to get the children, even if he was a holy one and she was bad to the bone. That's changing very slowly, but for now the judge will give the child to the mother in most cases.

One thing I don't understand... Why does she care so much if the boy is with her parents? She's seeing him 2-3 times a year and she doesn't want to change that? That's a joke, don't you think? It's like he doesn't have a mother anyway. And to be honest if her husband care about the son, he would be rising him already instead of leaving him with her parents...

It looks like they are just using the poor baby to blackmail each other and in fact they both don't even give a f**k about him unless they can angry the other part. It's pathetic. I get angry by just hearing about such "responsible" parents. The kid is rised by his grandparents at age when he needs his PARENTS the most... I doubt he will be grateful, i have few friends in such situation and I can only say, they were badly hurt by that and have some serious problems and I'm not suprised at all.

Love / I have met a wonderful Polish woman, but she has a 9 yrs old daughter [66]



Does that mean the same thing for you, sucker? You are doing it on purpose, so don't even try to deny it. In fact you should be totally ignored, that would take all the fun from it away for you.

Even if one girl would steal something from some guy, that wouldn't mean all polish people do something like that. And I doubt it, that an 8 year old would be capable of "stealling all someone's things and money". Some people really shouldn't been allowed to use Internet...

Love / I have met a wonderful Polish woman, but she has a 9 yrs old daughter [66]

I don't really know what kind of family you have in Poland, so speak for yourself, instead of all people.
And I think that you were not speaking about all children in the world, but about polish children being proffessional thiefs... So? Make up your mind, are all children thiefs or is it only polish children that differ so much psychologicaly since the day they are born?

Love / I have met a wonderful Polish woman, but she has a 9 yrs old daughter [66]


Still quicker than russians it seems... cause the way you act here... i wouldn't say you're more than 13 if you're polish...

As I read your posts, I get the feeling that you are sad and lousy jerk, isn't that the case? It seems that you have stupid, immature polish wife, your polish daughter is a thief since she was a baby and you are just overflowing with frustrations here. I bet you wouldn't have the guts to say all these things to polish people right in the face or you would get slapped like a cheap **** and sh*t your pants. You think you are so much better than others, while in fact it's quite opposite and only hiding behind the internet connection gives you the courage to do what you're doing here. I didn't have anything against russians, but if they are all like you, then it has to be the most pathetic nation I have ever heard about. But i guess it's just you.. getting excited writing bullsh*t about Poland, at least as long as nobody knows who you are, right?

Is there any administrator here? I just can't understand why this looser is still here... He would have been banned long time ago on any other forum for trolling... but is still tolerated here... I came here to practise my english a bit and see what people around the world know and think of Poland... But just reading what this intellectual impotent writes about makes me wonder if it's worth the time.

Love / I have met a wonderful Polish woman, but she has a 9 yrs old daughter [66]

And you would have to hide behind all that army to stop your knees shaking idiot. I see you didn't achieve anything yourself in your pathetic life and that's why you have to talk about great Russia all the time... Who did you rule? Your dog? Or maybe even that's too much for you?

And tell me, why do you have a polish wife?

Love / I have met a wonderful Polish woman, but she has a 9 yrs old daughter [66]

And what's wrong with the mother's education? If she has a kid, she's not allowed to have a relationship? If you had a wife and let's say she died or left you, you would be alone for the rest of your life?

Love / what is reasonable - he does not want me to go back to poland [55]

Angel you are not some stupid teen, so don't act like that. Love can be tough, but you shlould realize that he's just using you as a toy (or maybe he has other reasons) and it has nothing to do with love... Just finish it and stop torturing yourself, he's not worth it, so stop excusing him. Anyone hearing all this would tell you, that he's with somebody, but you still don't want to see it and just make things worse for yourself.

Life / HOW CAN POLISH PEOPLE AFFORD IT?? They are said to earn very little..? [43]


Bull***t. 700 USD is about 1700zl. You don't know anybody in Warsaw earning that? I know and I'm not even living there... But still, earning 1700 in Warsaw is the same as 1000 in a smaller town. Renting some place to live alone will cover the difference easily.

And how people can afford to go out? Many can't... Others don't live alone, so life gets cheaper. And many people get more money than it seems. Not only official pays are often lower than in reality but quite many try to get some additional money after work.


So come to Poland or go to Africa and be a "doer not thinker"... It's that simple, right? Maybe you don't realize, that if most people in those regions weren't "doers" they wouldn't make a living at all.


No, "everybody has the right to live in the same way as everybody else" is not the same as above. He only said that nobody is better/worse and I agree, that based on the skills and work done, everybody should deserve the same pay. But life isn't fair and that's all. Where don't you agree? There was this type of thinking, not so long ago, that some people are worse and can work without being fairly paid. It was called slavery.

Love / Is it possible to be friends with girls in Poland? [59]

I'm supprised that some polish girls talk so badly about other polish girls... Is it some kind of "I'm better than all the rest" syndrome? ;) Don't forget you are polish girls too, so somebody can mark you as one of those stupid and easy w**** some day...

I think there are girls who go after money in every country, not only in Poland. And I will even risk it and guess that some of them learnt that way of living from all those american movies etc.

I don't know what kind of friends you had here, but I know many girls who are smart and not looking for the money, not talking about shopping all the time, etc. and I think you only talk about some group of women. Maybe I don't know many of them, because I don't want too, but for sure I still have many girl friends, so please don't try to convince people, that most of the polish women are cheap, dumb and easy...

drifter I guess you will never know... The only way to be sure is to try ;) Maybe she wanted something more and maybe not... Still many men tend to confuse friendly gestures as something more. You didn't try so now you can only wonder ;)