Love / Scottish & Polish relationships [229]

Near your help guys and girls in Scots - Polish relationships. . . .

Firstly there is a 20 year age gap between me and them, secondly they are professional women in there early 30's, (money/power is not an issue) thirdly we've got along very well as friends. . . .. . but.

The first woman got friendly with me after we met on business. We went for a walk together one evening, went dancing. Seperated for few days, then met up again - this time she pushed her telephone number under my hotel room door (I didn't know she was in the hotel) asking if we could go out together. So we went out most nights for a couple of weeks, cinema, long walks, meals, sight seeing great fun (like we were dating) it felt really good - but no hint of anything sexual at all.

I moved to the other end of the country, so we couldn't meet up, but she still sends me emails asking if we can meet up, tells me our friendship is very precious and she loved the time we shared together.

Follow to a few months later, another girl, in a fairly unpleasant situation, I did the father daughter think, got her sorted out, then she starts phoning me and sending me emails to say 'I miss you and we have a very precious friendship' (almost the same words) again, no hint of anything sexual, but fairly intense.

I had a bit of an arguement with her and told her you can't send emails saying 'I miss you' to a 55 year old man and I didn't want to see her, but we patched it up and we meet up to go dancing as friends - but its wierd. I picked her up on Wednesday night and when I met at the Hospital (they are both doctors) he whole face lit up, and she told it had been such a long week without seeiing me.

They both say that want to be friends, and friends only and that's ok with me - but they don't act like friends,

Confused is not the word for it. . . . .

Love / Scottish & Polish relationships [229]

Some kind of idea what they want out of the relationship. . . . . I'm happy to be friends, I'm happy to have something more.

What I can't handle is someone saying they want to be 'friends' who phones you up every day to say they miss you or who pushes their telephone number under your door.

Friends don't do that - there are social rules. Friendship has mutal repsonsibilites.

Love / Polish girlfriend going back to Poland if I dont buy engagment ring [85]

The guy thinks this sort of attitude is especially 'Polish'

The girl wants some commitment - and if you can't make you're history. That goes just about anywhere in the Western World

Love / Scottish & Polish relationships [229]

Incidentally - Redhair is also a marker for being Jewish, except the genetic fault is different and only follows the female line.

Love / Scottish & Polish relationships [229]

Cutting through the sex garbage. . . . . .

Last year I spent some time living in an apartment block with Poles. . . . . we used to pass each other on the stairs every day.

After a few weeks as I carried my beer up the stairs I said to Polish guy I knew as a regular. . . . .fancy drink?

Everything changed. . .. .along with that impressive line 'you're not like everyone else' - 'no, I'm Scots'

English v Poles - no contest :-)

Love / Advice Please! Meeting my Polish boyfriend's parents!! Gifts, customs... [105]

Merged:Meeting Polish girlfriend family

Hi

Ok, posted to this board a year or so ago. Well it looks like its on.

I've been invited to Southern Poland by my Polish 'Girlfriend'. There's a big age gap between us, but we've talked it over and although we are both pretty scared the invite is on.

We knew each in the UK, sort of dated, now she wants to move onto a different level so I've been invited over for the weekend - I've no idea what is going to happen or where things are going to go from there.

I've got a feeling I'll be introduced to the parents.

We are both Catholics. . .so that's not an issue.

Any advice?

UK, Ireland / THE BIGGEST POLISH COMMUNITY IN U.K? [40]

Inverness and NE Scotland has (surprisingly) a large Polish and Lithuanian community. About 10% in some of the towns.

Inverness itself is the fastest growing city in the UK and has immigrants from everywhere.

There's nothing unusual in this, there was huge Polish and Lithuanian immigration into Lanarkshire before WW2 to work in the coalfields, and a lot of SS Galicia who were a mixture of Poles and Ukrainians settled there as well.

nationalarchives.gov.uk/releases/2005/highlights_aug/aug3/default.htm

Love / Advice Please! Meeting my Polish boyfriend's parents!! Gifts, customs... [105]

I'm from Scotland - the last drinking party I had with a bunch of Poles I was pretty much last man standing :-) I know the routine (and all about Biba) .

I definitely impressed my Polish hosts. "You Scots drink like Poles"

No self respecting Scot contaminates Whisky with anything other than water.. . . .

I've kicked about with Poles and Lithuanians in the UK (even as a child) so I'm not completely unfamiliar with the culture.

I'm just not familar with the family environment.

And I know flowers impress. . . . . the whole attitude changed when I sent her flowers.

We are both quite 'high' about meeting again

Love / Different relationship... can it work with Pakistani girl and Polish guy? [129]

Sweet G - are you mad?????

Your family will try and kill you. At minimum they will bury your coffin and count you as dead.

If the Polish guy you are interested in is a good, church going Catholic (which is unlikely) he will appreciate the difficulties.

If he is not religous, I see different problems

Love / Irish woman dating a Polish man - need advice about my polish boyfriend and marriage [24]

They are both Roman Catholic based cultures (especially as you are older rather than younger) . . . . . if there are difficulties they much more likely to be personal than cultural.

Just treat him like an Irish guy. The priest told him exactly the same stuff when he was a kid, he's got all the same imprinting as Irish guys, that's the way he was brought up.

History / Insoluble Judaeo-Polish imbroglio? [44]

No one wants to know or get involved - its history, and for good or bad, the Germans did achieve a 'Final Solution' to the Jewish Problem in Poland.

Love / Possibility of Marriage with a Polish lady [96]

The main problem (and it applies to all of Europe) is that women are not 'Property'.

Your posts seem to imply that you wish some kind of control over her. You will have none. If it turns out she thinks you are a reject, she is quite entitleed to change her mind and screw someone else.

She has choices. You can't buy her or control (if you check out the posts by the European guys hear that's a major issue)

A lot of of Muslims have problems with that concept.

Life / $3,000-$4,000 a month - would we have enough money to live in Poland? [273]

I'm Scots and have worked in Germany on long term contracts with Americans.

The issue is not so much money as adapting to a different culture. Most Europeans don't have a problem with the idea that everything is going to completely change - language, driving rules, polite manners etc. Americans seem to think that everything should be as it is the USA and are surprised - shocked even - when it isn't.

I can always remember the look of complete bafflement on the look of a Microsoft Engineer i(in a very upmarket hotel) discovering that the menu was written in German. . . . .

I can remember saying, 'Yeah well, you're in Germany, that's the way it happens, they speak German here'

Everything about day to day living is going to change - and you have to change with that. If's fun - I enjoy it.

If you go into it with the attitude 'It's not like the USA' you will hit problems immediately.

I would go for it, simply on the basis that when you go back you can tell your fellow Americans 'I have lived amongst the Ferengi - and I am alive to tell the tale :-)

Love / Advice Please! Meeting my Polish boyfriend's parents!! Gifts, customs... [105]

I've booked the flight and things are organised - but its become an order of magnistude more scary.

She's an ex nun and I'm her first boyfriend. . . . . . . .

Yeah. . . .It doesn't seem real to me either. . . . .but its easily believable given her behaviour.

Love / Why do frustrated men ask silly questions about Polish women or girls? [42]

Solutu. . . . you have no understanding of the cultural values of Polish society.

Most non Northern European cultures regard lying as totally socially acceptable. It's what you do to get what you want.

While and Arab might say to a girl on the street that he met 30 minutes before that she was the most beautiful girl in the world and that he was in love with her - most Polish men and Scandinavians would need a bottle of Vodka before they would come out with those words.

That's because they would mean what they say.

They wouldn't be saying it to get the girl into bed

Life / Prosze, dziekuje, przepraszam - cultural significance? [5]

I don't the Polish. . . . . but

youtube.com/watch?v=zpFTrycPCqo&feature=related

youtube.com/watch?v=w_C_7dLpIFA&feature=related

youtube.com/watch?v=wUzCBzVkyAA&feature=related

Life / The term: "camp aesthetic." Popular in Poland yet? [27]

In non-US British - Anzac culture 'Camp' is an expression used to describe obvious (and usually deliberate) homosexual behaviour. It's nothing to do with art.

US usage is VERY different from non-US usage as the Wikipedia article makes clear. You can get yourself in a lot of trouble with this one if you don't understand it means different things on different sides of the pond.

American usage

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Camp_%28style%29

British usage

guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/nov/30/the-end-of-camp-straight-acting-gay

Life / The term: "camp aesthetic." Popular in Poland yet? [27]

If someone is blatantly effeminate homosexual - they are 'camp'

What has that got to do with art?

Language / Is rosetta stone any good for learning Polish? [51]

Hi

Yes and no. . . . . . . . . Rosetta is very good an enlarging your vocabulary, not so good at grammar (and Polish grammar is DIFFICULT) , Pimsleur will get you the basic's quickly, but you will have no vocabulary, Michel Thomas will give grammar and knowledge of the structure of the language, but like Pimsleur will be short on vocabularly.

Over the last 12 months I've used Rosetta, Collins, Pimsleur and now Michel Thomas. All of them (with the exception of Collins) take a different approach and have a different purpose.

Fast result - Pimsleur, its good for ordering drinks and finding the toilet - but not much else.
Enlarging the vocubulary and pronouciation - Rosetta Stone.
Getting a grip of structure and grammar - Michel Thomas

They should be done in that order.

The Michel Thomas is a bit of a revelation 'ah, that's how it all fits together' - but I am pretty sure I would not have got that feeling without the range of vocabulary learn from Rosetta.

The final stage is getting Polish language films (Three Colours and Walt Disney are good) and getting so you can follow the film without subtitles. When you find yourself ignoring the sub-titles you've just about cracked it. (that's when I knew I had cracked German, I haven't quite got to that stage in Polish)

I would agree with the comments about Rosetta Stone. You'll learn lots of words - but you won't know how to use them. Pimsleur and Michel Thomas are better for the reasons the youtube reviewer describes. You need three things in learning a language.

1. A basic feel for the language and how it sounds and works
2. Words - Vocabulary
3. How to fit everything together

No one program can to that - and if it did it would be an enormous project. As the reviewer (and anyone who has learned another language will tell you) you need to forced into situations where you are forced to use the language. Michel Thomas is particularly good at this, but if you haven't got a good vocabulary, then you won't have anything to say.

As the reviews says, one of the best ways to learn is in the car or waiting for the train, or situations where you have time. Computer based programs can't do that. Persistence is the key - you really have to be surrounded by the language. Like turning on Michel Thomas or Pimsleur while you are washing the dishes or cleaning the house. You find yourself answering questions and creating sentences to describe what you are doing instinctively. To do that you need words, and the only way to learn words is through the 'flash card' approach - which Rosettal Stone is a very sophisticated example of.