missbutterfly 1 | 3
12 Apr 2009 / #1
Hi,
So I live in the US. I have been together with a Polish guy for about 2 years. Things were really good for the first year and he was a real gentleman. Right after he met me, he met this other girl and became really good friends with her to the point that they were hanging out almost every other weekend. I didn't mind since he told me he was friends with her and I also wanted to hang out with my friends some weekends. I only saw her once in real life last year and she was kind of rude to me which made me think that maybe she did not know about my existence up to then. That day I told my boyfriend to stop contacting her we got into a huge fight and he promised me that he would end the friendship.
So last summer, me and the Polish guy had a fallout and we decided to take a break for a month. During this month, he constantly kept seeing her and even went with her on a vacation with a couple of other friends. After this month, me and him decided to go back together because we missed eachother and worked things out. However this girl did not stop texting and calling him and sending her e-mails saying that she wants to be with him. She also contacted me crying on several occasions saying that my guy had been with her all along, which my guy denied. My guy promised me that he would stop contact with her many times, but he didn't. Instead he would txt her, and then delete all the msgs so that I would not see them. I ended up contacting her a few times and things turned nasty.
One day, I broke into my guy's laptop and recovered all the deleted msgs and saw that he was talking to her and even meeting her on a couple of occasions even though he told me otherwise. However there was no indication of a relationship between them in the messages. In fact, I checked history up to 2 years, and there was no indication of anything other than friendship between them. My boyfriend seemed cold to her recently but she was constantly pushing him to talk in the msg's.
So in New year's eve I was out of town, apparently my bf met up with that girl. She sent me a txt msg from his phone saying Happy new year! I was pissed I confronted my boyfriend and he denied and I had accidentally deleted that msg so I had no proof. It's been 5 months and I know they are still txting and talking on Gadu Gadu. I meet my boyfriend almost every day so I know he cannot be seeing her but why is he still in contact with him, I do not understand. And why does she not move on? Also, my boyfriend always changes the subject when I try to talk about her and gets angry.
The other thing is, my bf owes her 2000 dollars and for a while she would call him every day to ask the money back. My bf paid it partially and now he says she is still calling him about the money. But I am not convinced. I discovered from my bf's phone records that she calls him almost every day for half hour, come on how much money talk can they have for so long?
Do you guys have any similar experiences/ideas? What do you think I should do? I've tried contacting the girl but she does not talk to me and has limited English. Do you think I should just let them be friends? But I think this girl seems to want more. Especially since she's considerably older (30) and illegal and does not even have a good job. My bf has a start up business and makes pretty good money so sometimes I think she's really desperate.
So I live in the US. I have been together with a Polish guy for about 2 years. Things were really good for the first year and he was a real gentleman. Right after he met me, he met this other girl and became really good friends with her to the point that they were hanging out almost every other weekend. I didn't mind since he told me he was friends with her and I also wanted to hang out with my friends some weekends. I only saw her once in real life last year and she was kind of rude to me which made me think that maybe she did not know about my existence up to then. That day I told my boyfriend to stop contacting her we got into a huge fight and he promised me that he would end the friendship.
So last summer, me and the Polish guy had a fallout and we decided to take a break for a month. During this month, he constantly kept seeing her and even went with her on a vacation with a couple of other friends. After this month, me and him decided to go back together because we missed eachother and worked things out. However this girl did not stop texting and calling him and sending her e-mails saying that she wants to be with him. She also contacted me crying on several occasions saying that my guy had been with her all along, which my guy denied. My guy promised me that he would stop contact with her many times, but he didn't. Instead he would txt her, and then delete all the msgs so that I would not see them. I ended up contacting her a few times and things turned nasty.
One day, I broke into my guy's laptop and recovered all the deleted msgs and saw that he was talking to her and even meeting her on a couple of occasions even though he told me otherwise. However there was no indication of a relationship between them in the messages. In fact, I checked history up to 2 years, and there was no indication of anything other than friendship between them. My boyfriend seemed cold to her recently but she was constantly pushing him to talk in the msg's.
So in New year's eve I was out of town, apparently my bf met up with that girl. She sent me a txt msg from his phone saying Happy new year! I was pissed I confronted my boyfriend and he denied and I had accidentally deleted that msg so I had no proof. It's been 5 months and I know they are still txting and talking on Gadu Gadu. I meet my boyfriend almost every day so I know he cannot be seeing her but why is he still in contact with him, I do not understand. And why does she not move on? Also, my boyfriend always changes the subject when I try to talk about her and gets angry.
The other thing is, my bf owes her 2000 dollars and for a while she would call him every day to ask the money back. My bf paid it partially and now he says she is still calling him about the money. But I am not convinced. I discovered from my bf's phone records that she calls him almost every day for half hour, come on how much money talk can they have for so long?
Do you guys have any similar experiences/ideas? What do you think I should do? I've tried contacting the girl but she does not talk to me and has limited English. Do you think I should just let them be friends? But I think this girl seems to want more. Especially since she's considerably older (30) and illegal and does not even have a good job. My bf has a start up business and makes pretty good money so sometimes I think she's really desperate.