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Men attitude towards women in the Polish culture

8 May 2006 /  #1
hiya i was wondering if somebody could fill me in on what polish society is like- in terms of relationships and roles between men and women? thanx sam x
9 May 2006 /  #2
well from my experience- the boyfriend pays for everything. and that was confirmed by the women i met there a month ago. the women dress well and look good all the time, Polish women are usually running late and can be a bit inconsiderate.
9 May 2006 /  #3
well from my experience- the boyfriend pays for everything.

Based on that I BET you must be a very nice girl; otherwise your boyfriend wouldn't probably care that much :).
9 May 2006 /  #4
i was the the boyfriend.
9 May 2006 /  #5
Oh oops :). Well, Polish men still rule - Polish women are supposed to take care of children and the family. But it changes quickly - especially in the big cities -- women are bosses, managers, etc. I think the best word to describe the relationship between men and women in Poland is "partnership" -- I think that's why so many men want to marry Polish women :).
OP sam_star86  
9 May 2006 /  #6
haha ok well i hope many polish men want to marry english women then too! i am dating a polish man and i like to go halves on everything but noticed that can make him upset or embarressed and he wont let me buy him things!also noticed theyr very open and friendly and honest but also more possessive early on. i was wondering whether this was just my experience or what! thanx x
9 May 2006 /  #7
Well, Polish men are gallant and don't want their woman to be too "smart" as they want to feel they are in control. But inside, I think, they like their women to be operative :)
OP sam_star86  
9 May 2006 /  #8
what do you mean by operative? also do you know if one ringing (ringing once then putting the phone down) means something to polish people?! my friend says that in portugal they do it to say "ok", whereas i would only do it to get somebody to call me back, yet my polish friends do it a lot and seemingly for no reason!! x
9 May 2006 /  #9
I mean - economical, hard working, family-oriented.

Regarding one-ringing - have no idea. Why would you call someone just to hang up? :|
10 May 2006 /  #10
Well... Personally I do not believe in any typical, general attitude of Poles towards their girls (wives, friends, etc.). Some elements are simply products of our culture and tradition which in most cases are handed on in every part of the civilized world. For example very typical behaviour like letting women in front of you while entering to the building, elevator and so on, or giving a bouquets and gifts spontaneously etc. Secondly, I totally disagree with the conclusion that men

don't want their woman to be too "smart" as they want to feel they are in control

it sounds as if we were in the middle ages. Its just another stereotype sticked to the general picture of a Pole. Its of course exaggerated but, on the other hand, we can always find "a black sheep of the family" anytime and anywhere not only here in Poland.

I can even write, that the more educated and inteligent woman is, the more attractive she is in man's eyes. In fact, I am proud of my wife, for she is well educated and self-esteem woman. And believe me or not its definitely better to have such partner.

Thats all from me now.
16 May 2006 /  #11
also if anyone can tell me, if a polish person comes to the uk to work can they stay indefinitley now as its in the eu?

I was looking into this yesterday - from what I can make out they don't need a work permit but they are required to apply to register with the Home Office under the new 'Worker Registration Scheme' as soon as they find work and once they have been in continuous employment for 12 months they can apply for residency.

One conversation I had with my Polish friend (male) was about cigarettes - he really doesn't like it when I take a cigarette out of the packet and offer it to him (I have to leave a cigarette half out of the pack and offer the pack for him to take that one) and he will NEVER let me light his cigarette, hard to get used to when you're used to doing everything for someone lol.

I also bought him a English-Polish Dictionary as he was borrowing his friends and I almost had to force him to take it, it's nice in a way but like I said a bit frustrating when you're not used to it.
14 Jun 2006 /  #12
Ive found this very discussion very interesting. I am living with my Polish boyfriend and have found that he is incredibly possessive and distrustful, to the extent that I hardly see my friends any more as he hates me going out without him. He says that this is a cultural difference and that when you are married or living with someone you dont go out alone, but you invite friends to your house or go out as a couple. He also said that Polish people are generally distrustful because of what they have been through in the past (i.e. communism). Do other people find this generally to be true of Polish men or is he just trying to justify his behaviour with this excuse?
14 Jun 2006 /  #13
Well, there are various people - some are more and some are less jaleous. If your boyfriend is jaleous to an extent that he dosent "allow" you to go anywhere alone then there`s something wrong with him... ...though in Poland it is ussual for - married - couples to go out to parties and have fun together.
1 Aug 2006 /  #14
I need someone to advise me on Polish guys.The guy has flirted with me for the last few months and has not stopped complimented me when his girlfriend is not around, (we live in the same building). I feel bad for his girlfriend but wonder is this normal in their community?
1 Aug 2006 /  #15
Well, Polish men are gallant and don't want their woman to be too "smart" as they want to feel they are in control. But inside, I think, they like their women to be operative

I can only say that I found that commend a bit silly, I dated a Polish guy and he was inteligent and I dont think he'd would have been happy with a woman that couldnt hold a conversation of a certain standard
20 Aug 2006 /  #16
Czesc! I had just stumbled across this website and I was hoping that perhaps one of you could help me with a little dilemma I have. You see, I have a polish friend and we’ve known each other for maybe two years but for the past couple months we have started to get “close”. Maybe because we never really spent so much time together before, I don’t know. I should add that I am living with my “boyfriend”, at least until we are both ready to go our own way. My friend knows this and we’ve briefly discuss it.

Anyway, to my question. How do I know if he is interested? He is the most incredible man I have ever met. He opens doors for me, when we go out he insists that he pays and we can talk for hour. Literally 4, 5, 6 hours. In conversation we have brought up life, marriage, love, etc. He says he’s not interested then gives me this smile, so I can’t tell if he’s joking. Oh by the way, he has an amazing sense of humor. I would also like to add that at first I thought he wasn’t very intelligent but he is. There is a language barrier that I am now learning to overcome. In fact he has told me that he would like me to learn polish. He is in Poland now, for a month. Maybe I can by the time he gets back.

What should I do? I want him to know how I feel but I don’t want to scare him off. Or could it be that he is just being nice for sex? What could I do to let him know but keep it friendly at the same time? Any suggestions. Anything at all. Dziekuje!!!!
6 Mar 2007 /  #17
I'm English and have been dating a Polish guy for a few weeks now. He is such a lovely guy and is so attentive I can't believe my luck sometimes! As far as how to know whether a Polish man is interested in you... how do you ever know?!!! I would guess if he's giving you the signals then he probably likes you! Polish men may be a different nationality to us but they aren't alien beings, the basic rules of attraction still apply! Good luck whatever happens!

PS. with the ringing once and hanging up thing, apparently it's just to let you know that they are thinking of you at a particular moment in time. Quite sweet I think!
krysia 23 | 3,058  
6 Mar 2007 /  #18
My bf is in Poland. He rings me once just to let me know he thinks about me.
And I tell you, Polish guys keep you on your feet. They will say something to grab your attention then you have to figure the rest out.

But that's OK. I do the same to him...:)
BubbaWoo 33 | 3,504  
6 Mar 2007 /  #19
He rings me once just to let me know he thinks about me

cool :)
krysia 23 | 3,058  
6 Mar 2007 /  #20
Yeah, it is cool. It costs a lot to call from Poland and he cannot send text messages to the US, so I have a blast texting him!
Tamara 9 | 202  
6 Mar 2007 /  #21
PS. with the ringing once and hanging up thing, apparently it's just to let you know that they are thinking of you at a particular moment in time. Quite sweet I think!

When I was in Poland last time - I noticed this and they called it "ba,ki". Not sure if they meant bees or the other one :)

BubbaWoo 33 | 3,504  
8 Mar 2007 /  #22
I have noticed about Central and Eastern European people is that they are phenomenonally good at networking

thats an interesting observation szar... everybody i know in poland knows someone who can sort something out... fair enough... but i found the concept of friendly cooperation sadly lacking... very little you scratch my back and ill scratch yours...
szarlotka 8 | 2,205  
8 Mar 2007 /  #23

A trifle over familiar, you may call me Pan Pie if you like:)

I see your point though. I guess it's the speed of execution when they do decide to help each other out that I noticed,
BubbaWoo 33 | 3,504  
8 Mar 2007 /  #24
strewth Pan Pie... dont want to over step the bounderies... :)

but i do like trifle...
8 Mar 2007 /  #25
women in Poland are put on pedestal and do all the work:)- is my simplified version of the present situation
2 Apr 2007 /  #26
i have a question i like a polish guy at work and i want to know if the language "barrier" can make trubble because i have to get his mate to translate some things because my polish is not very good
3 Apr 2007 /  #27
hi everyone...i met a few polish ladies and i find 3 out 5 hypered and argumetive. i know Babara for almost 5 years and yet we got togather on and off for a few times. none of us has anything higher than the other niether physicaly nor financialy or even educationaly and old enough to dance indoor but yet i must say that she is well trained in...not to except her own mistakes...agressive and off that she is...does...and knows everything best...complains non stop...asks personal quastions but i'll be looking for troubel if i do the same. does her best to show that she is the only one in control and whenever i tried to act the same then either she left my room or asked me to leave hers and took me weeks or even mounths to get her back again...she is clean...working...very independed...too proud to expect anything at

all...and these are her best part that i do my best to compriomise with her...a word that she doesn't even want to memorise it!! well i am from middel east but she is the one who wants (the solar system to rotate in her directory order) and yes!!she is going to be all mine if and only(if) i do as she says or does and since i don't then her absence and my disapointment gives me the chance to improve my english by writting (sharing) it with you...? am i wrong to say that she could be the female Melosevic if she had the power?
3 Apr 2007 /  #28
O well... there goes the "polish doormat theory" out of the window
Eurola 4 | 1,900  
3 Apr 2007 /  #29
Yes, we can be all! A princess, a leader, ...a doormat. Something for everybody.

unless you want to be the doormat - RUN! You will never win with Barbara.
witek 1 | 587  
3 Apr 2007 /  #30
Most Polish women young and old are very family oriented and they usually enjoy cooking and cleaning:) This is usually the role of a Polish women even if she is employed.

The Polish man is the breadwinner and is expected to support the wife and kids.

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