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Little advice please - another guy called my Polish fiance beautiful.


warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #1
Hi my Polish Fiance got a text from this guy at work that I accidentially saw, was about their xmas party... all fine and nothing odd only the last bit of the text he said

see you jutro Piekna as in tomorrow Beautiful.

I think this is an inappropriate way to be addressing a friend, he may have only been joking and I know that My Finace would never address anyone like this who was a male friend, possibly a female friend.

Obviously I cant say that I read this text, this guy is Irish and also has a very good looking polish GF, I asked in a round about way was this guy ok and acted appropriately with her and she said he was ok and had not acted like anything.

I of course trust my GF but she maybe does not seem to think that this is any kind of a big deal, I would never for example say that to a female friend, and Im sure his gf wouldnt think it was cool for him to do so.

He also started being very friendly to me lately when otherwise he was never... my Fiance says he is shy... doesnt sound very shy to my by that text though,

bearing in mind I know she wouldnt say anything like this back should I just leave and know that if anything was to be attempted by him she would kick him in the nuts?

B
Wroclaw  44 | 5359  
10 Dec 2008 /  #2
Hi my Polish Fiance got a text from this guy at work that I accidentially saw,

What sort of phone does she have that remains on when she is not using it ?

And if it were e-mail. Why did you feel the need to read all of it ?

I'm sure that she is smart enough to delete damning texts anyway.
OP warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #3
Mobiles usually remain on... was turning the alarm off, yeah I know I should not have read it really... Its no problem from her side anyway,

do you mean she would have deleted it if there was something in it or do you mean ones she would have sent?

B
Lodz_The_Boat  32 | 1522  
10 Dec 2008 /  #4
my Fiance says he is shy

Be careful there.

Afterall its UK... i've heard and seen Polish girls go abit ...umm....reckless? there in UK.
Lir  
10 Dec 2008 /  #5
Afterall its UK

LOL.......it's the weather that causes it :)
loco polaco  3 | 352  
10 Dec 2008 /  #6
see what happens when you read others' private stuff? now you're all freaking out.. serves you right.
Wroclaw  44 | 5359  
10 Dec 2008 /  #7
do you mean she would have deleted it if there was something in it or do you mean ones she would have sent?

I mean her mail is none of your business and if she didn't trust you she would delete it anyway.

Now your question should be: Does my girlfriend trust me ?

Please, excuse me. I'm a little confused with peoples problems after reading another thread.

Show a little more faith in your girlfriend. Respect and trust are everything.
OP warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #8
Its Ireland... and she has been here for 7 years and never been reckless.... and FU Loco Polaco... the question I asked was whether his way of addressing her was appropriate, we live together for fuck sake... id know well if anything untoward was going on.....
dtaylor  9 | 823  
10 Dec 2008 /  #9
so then u have nothing to worry about.
If u trust her, dont worry about it, it wont come between u, ur just making a mountain out of a mole hill;)
OP warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #10
Cheers.. yeah I know that from her side which is what my best mate already told me.

He also said that he thought that what that guy said was not cool but sure not to worry, she is trust worthy and there will always be some goon sniffing around.
Wroclaw  44 | 5359  
10 Dec 2008 /  #11
id know well if anything untoward was going on.....

Well obviously you don't. otherwise you wouldn't be asking the question.

A good looking woman will receive many and varied compliments. Beautiful, may be one of them.

Instead of feeling the worst. Why don't you rejoice in the fact that others also admire your girlfriend.
OP warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #12
I think your missing the point though,

if Your bf said "see you tomorrow Beautiful" to another girl would you not be pissed off? I'm just thinking that this guy may be a bit of a sly fox, I would'nt say such a thing to someones GF and especially out of respect for my Fiance. she has not done anything.

Or the fact that is was the only 2 polish words in it and he is not fluent she let it slide.

I just maybe think she thinks there is nothing in it when I do maybe,

If the situation were reversed I would not be confortable with a female friend of mine texting me 'gorgeous' or whatever.

B
Cardno85  31 | 971  
10 Dec 2008 /  #13
To be honest it's a tough one. On the one hand you shouldn't have seen the message or read it and so there is little you can really do without it causing an issue. However you have read it and now it has made you a bit paranoid.

To be honest I would think that was a slightly innapropriate text message ending to send a colleague. I reckon only VERY close friends would ever warrant that sort of message unless you were trying to get into their pants.

I would leave it for the time being mate and put it off to him showing off his Polish and not really meaning it. Don't let it get you paranoid.
Lir  
10 Dec 2008 /  #14
I just maybe think she thinks there is nothing in it when I do maybe,

I think you are making too much out of it perhaps ?

She didn't hide the message and some men do talk like that to friends <nothing to do with Nationality either>

You say you trust her ? Then just do that and leave it . She is marrying you after all isn't she and it is quite a harmless comment really :)

Unless you have other suspicions ?
Krakowianka  1 | 243  
10 Dec 2008 /  #15
To be honest I would think that was a slightly innapropriate text message ending to send a colleague

I second that. If he's not fluent in the language, it seems he sure tried to get that "piekna" in there, and has made you paranoid. Did you guys ever hang out with him, or with him & his gf? Maybe if you did, you could see how he acted towards your fiance.

I'd say leave it be for now, and see if she mentions him in conversation later.
loco polaco  3 | 352  
10 Dec 2008 /  #16
fu? truth hurts doesn't it bucko. good luck but i bet she'll be leaving you soon enough. she doesn't deserve an untrusting butthole like you. haha
OP warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #17
Unless you have other suspicions ?

Not at all.. she has never cheated on anyone ever and is very secure in herself...

To be honest I would think that was a slightly innapropriate text message ending to send a colleague. I reckon only VERY close friends would ever warrant that sort of message unless you were trying to get into their pants.

I would leave it for the time being mate and put it off to him showing off his Polish and not really meaning it. Don't let it get you paranoid.

Good advice, I don't think he is a good enough friend for that kind of thing.... female = fine, male friend for YEARS.. maybe ok, but not a 6 month work colleague, she is a clever and trustworthy girl and so I just have to remember that he has no chance anyway.

fu? truth hurts doesn't it bucko. good luck but i bet she'll be leaving you soon enough. she doesn't deserve an untrusting butthole like you. haha

Your the troll flaming someone asking a valid question, fair enough I should not have read it but he also shouldnt be saying stuff like that. Its not like I would ever impede or try to control her, im dealing with issues myself and im certainly not implying SHE did anything wrong... so whatever dude, ;-)

B
Wroclaw  44 | 5359  
10 Dec 2008 /  #18
I think your missing the point though,

if Your bf said "see you tomorrow Beautiful" to another girl would you not be pissed off?

If this is addressed to me:

I wouldn't worry at all if 'my boyfriend' was over polite to a girl.

My wife might be a little concerned that I'd turned Gay though. :)
OP warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #19
I second that. If he's not fluent in the language, it seems he sure tried to get that "piekna" in there, and has made you paranoid. Did you guys ever hang out with him, or with him & his gf? Maybe if you did, you could see how he acted towards your fiance.

I'd say leave it be for now, and see if she mentions him in conversation later.

I have done and didnt notice anything really, she was at a party in his house without me but his GF was present, also she left the xmas party at 12 and headed to a party where I was and let them go on to the nightclub, nothing screams red flag at all on her part as I said.

If this is addressed to me:

I wouldn't worry at all if 'my boyfriend' was over polite to a girl.

My wife might be a little concerned that I'd turned Gay though. :)

haha.. sorry, I misread the sign... same question but with your WIFE and Gorgeous then :)

Just this guys text and the fact that it doesnt seem to have red flagged anything from her.

B
Wroclaw  44 | 5359  
10 Dec 2008 /  #20
Just this guys text and the fact that it doesnt seem to have red flagged anything from her.

That's because it (the text) means nothing to her.
OP warham  1 | 12  
10 Dec 2008 /  #21
Nice :).. cheers dude.... I just think I let what other people do get to me too much and im the one that ends up thinking about it not them, at the end of the day its only what She and I do that matters.

It just annoys me that so many people seem to have no morals these days, I think if people thought more often 'how would I like it if someone did (whatever) how would I like it? We would all be better off.

B
polishgirltx  
10 Dec 2008 /  #22
if Your bf said "see you tomorrow Beautiful" to another girl would you not be pissed off? I'm just thinking that this guy may be a bit of a sly fox, I would'nt say such a thing to someones GF and especially out of respect for my Fiance. she has not done anything.

i think you're exaggerating... relax and there is no need to dump F-bombs at people who try to help you when you asked...
OP warham  1 | 12  
11 Dec 2008 /  #23
This is all sorted now, cheers for the advice,

:)

B
ShelleyS  14 | 2883  
11 Dec 2008 /  #24
Over reaction if ever I saw one! One of the guys at work calls me "sweet" another one calls me "darling" a friend of mine who is married calls me "lollipop" or sweetypie" oh and "hunnybunny" the office pervert calls me sexy...you see these are just words nothing more..........god some people!!!

i think you're exaggerating... relax and there is no need to dump F-bombs at people who try to help you when you asked...

Yep!

good luck but i bet she'll be leaving you soon enough. she doesn't deserve an untrusting butthole like you. haha

lol :)
dtaylor  9 | 823  
11 Dec 2008 /  #25
Yeah it is over-reaction, i call most girls babe, but doesnt mean anything:)
espana  17 | 947  
11 Dec 2008 /  #26
hire a detective or anything like that :)
Harry  
11 Dec 2008 /  #27
This is all sorted now, cheers for the advice,

I hope that means you did the manly thing: killed him and dumped his concrete-encased body in the river.
Lotnik767  3 | 145  
11 Dec 2008 /  #28
Instead talking to us about this problem talk to her and don't be afraid that she might get mad at you, that is how bad thing happen it stars with flirting and it goes to touching, kissing and sex. I did that one with a girl back in the day when I was in college I didn’t think of it much back then I thought it was innocent, it was just this small flirts that got me and her together for me it was an experiment that worked, look there is nothing wrong with compliments once in a while, but if this pursues I would check it out and I would be tough with her. Remember don't let it happen and don't be scared talking with her. Oh and if you tell that to the guy he will just pursue doing it then you would have to kick his ass for it if you are not afraid, well good luck and I hope you resolve your problems soon!!
diana  
11 Dec 2008 /  #29
Sorry but after my experience its better not to read somebody else emails, mob text etc.. by accident. You know sometimes you can interpret wrongly the words. If she really want do cheat you she would erase all her text msgs. Anyway take it like this think that you got really beautiful fiancee and other men are jealous about it and you are the only one who can have her...!!! If I would be a men I would be proud that other men saying about my girl that she is beautiful, sexy etc...

Good luck.
OP warham  1 | 12  
12 Dec 2008 /  #30
I talked to her about it and apologised for reading it... She was a bit pissed off about me reading it but it was the right thing to do.

Turns out he says it to ALL the polish girls working there whether they are Piekna or not so thats why she does not think its a big deal, if it was anything else or he was doing anything she considered flirting or trying it on she would nip it in the bud....

When his GF calls him he always says Kochaine or Sexy so Piekna is just the word he uses for all the polish girls in work as a term of endearment.

so lesson is trust your other half to make the right choice... You also have to factor in my Finace's personality and history in which she has never in her life cheated on anyone :)

Instead talking to us about this problem talk to her and don't be afraid that she might get mad at you, that is how bad thing happen it stars with flirting and it goes to touching, kissing and sex

Sorry man, I don't agree with this, no one can make someone cheat, if they love you and want to be with you it shouldnt matter what the hell anyone says to them they should be the one to say no and stop it going further, I can't control anyone and neither can you, if someone wants to cheat they will cheat.

B

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