Why are Polish people so ruthless?

It is disappointing that they would come across and start playing games. That would be my first question to any woman, do you have a partner? If she says no and it subsequently turns out that she has one, that's not your fault.

them? That says it all. If you make good deeds you should not expect anything back in return because you were the one who made that choice in the first place.

Reading the first post, it sounds like you were looking for more than that.

Kind actions are only kind if well intended, if they are unconditional.

So did you manage to get your leg over before the boyfriend rumbled you ? :-)


Isn't that what you are supposed to do Mr Brent ?

Power syndrome - you are en employee.

What a funny bunch you are. It's almost as though - 'You helped people - you deserve to be smacked in the face.'

And Szkotja - no it is NOT what I am supposed to do.

Ksysia, Szkotja and the many others who have criticized me here, I guess you are the very type of people I am talking about. The crazy thing is that ultimately the Polish people that like turning on people who have helped them, are the ones who will suffer. One of those people that is no longer speaking to me now wants her working weekends changed so that it is in line with her husband's working hours. She had to go to the Housekeeper to ask for this - in turn the Housekeeper came to me and I subsequently said 'No.'

As it happens I am not really supposed to change their work hours regularly anyway, I was just doing it because they needed that help and I was able to. I can still do it but now, as of this week, I choose not to. Of course though, any new Pole joining will still be treated with kindness until they decide to turn on me too.

Don't worry, Anglikman, I know what you mean. People take liberties when abroad and I've seen it many's a time. Rather than be humanitarian and try and understand your kindness, some people will try to belittle you and pretend that you caused the problem without even knowing you.

I find little worse than backstabbing, it should be one of the sins in the Bible.

Honey - are you female? Your writing feels female, I'm not sure why you are calling yourself AnglikMan?

Let me explain something to you - you have indicated that you are using your job on your whim, if you like someone - you will amend the timesheet system for them, even though your employment term prohibit you to do so. If you don't like someone, you will not amend. This is a sign of very low morality, you are using resources that aren't even yours to please your ego. Now you proudly write that you took your own little vengeance at work.

It is the same level of low morality as to hold someone's pay cheque in the system too long, so that they have a late pay day, 'because I can'.

Reading that, I have no more doubts that I would not associate with you either.

Ksysia I think you are someone who finds amusement in just making it up as you go along. Where on eart on this thread have I said that I break rules and amend people's timesheets? I said I can change people's working hours (meaning BEFORE they have worked them) and I swap their shifts with other people if they want to. Things that are frowned upon by the company but not anything immoral or illegal.

By the way, I would not let you associate with me anyway.

So new-age men don't exist, ksysia? Guys can't do good deeds for others? It boils down to gratitude and some have a hard time showing it.

of course guys who do good exist, Seanus!

This one however so much resembles HR ladies in the old system! Pani z Kadr is something like Post Office lady - no you can't take your hols!

I admire your positive attitude, but on this occasion he specifically mentioned that he 'fell in love' with a woman in a relationship, started doing favours to her peer group, and stopped doing those favours when he receives a negative message. He also says that other people he didn't fall in love with, Slovakians I think, had not received such favours and have not changed their attitude.

Dear Seanus - you are very good, but I think that demanding very personal favours in exchange for work favours in wrong.

Indeed it does. Personally I think Ksysia is right, the one case of uncaring he’s talking about in his opening statement turned to revenge dished on all of them. Now all of them shun him. What he perceives as ungratefulness and rudeness is payment in kind. Whatever favors he may have done previously have been negated by one act of revenge on all of them simply because he can. So who’s the A-Hole?

Yes, I agree with this evaluation of the situation.


Here:


And the other question is, why could someone who works for him not come directly to him to ask for this herself? she had to use the Housekeeper as an intermediate. Fishy...

How about, a few who are and most really aren't in this case? Anyway, I'm sure you get the idea..

;)


Has it ever occurred to you that maybe, in some situations, you could point the finger at yourself, instead of punishing others for your own misfortune?


Well, it turns out that she has a boyfriend, or a husband already. (Which is it?) Too bad for you.


That's what you tell yourself. Ofcourse the guy doesn't like you. She's his girlfriend, and you've said it yourself, you've allowed yourself to fall in love with her. (And maybe she even encouraged you in some way, I guess we'll never know!) The bottom line? There are more than enough ladies out there who don't have a boyfriend, or a husband. (Should I draw you a map?)

;)

Regardless, you shouldn't take it out on others, and not even on her, simply because you're disappointed. Hey, don't expect everyone to like you, and don't expect everyone to please you either! There's no point in debating this really, and no actual harm has been done? (Okay, maybe she has bruised your ego a little, but you should be able to shrug it off!) You'll be fine.

:)

Anglikman, can you give us any more specifics?

Excellent! Be kind, but only to the persons who deserve it. People will learn.

Oy vey ! Sheep, you are naive like a 5 years old girl. How do you know what happened there ? Do you know what the 2nd side of this "confilct" has to say about It ? Don't you think their opinion would be completely different ? Do you find It realistic that he really was such a fantastic guy and they all treat him like a trash ?

According to my experience all the people with that "me great, they all bad, eveil and ungrateful" attitude this guy is presenting, are total jerks and damn oxygen thieves.


LOL !


Exactly.

You don't know the full position either, Greg, yet you jumped to conclusions. In the absence of more info, you shouldn't be so quick to judge. Judge not, lest thee be judged yourself.

Yawn....maybe, true....yes ;) ;)

Okay let's take Ksysia's comment at random from the many here that have no basis in any kind of reality. The Slovakians along with the Indians, Zimbabweans, Nigerians, Filipinos, Brazilians and people from all the other countries represented where I work have recieved many acts of help from me. Please stop peddling such drivel Ksysia when all it amounts to is childish lies on your part. The reality is you do not like it because I have expressed a critizism of your country, which incidentally, still remains a country I very much like.

The rest of you who have sought to make some frankly, breath-taking assumptions will not have the pleasure of seeing a response from me to your posts.

The reason I began this thread was not for sympathy or support as many of you seemed to have assumed. I started this because I was seeking to understand why it is the Polish act so differently to the rest of the nationalities I encounter. By the way they have often been attacked at work for dispalying petulent behaviour with the others and I have always stuck up for them and made excuses on their behalf. Not any more I'm afraid. I began this thread because Polish Forums is a website for Polish people and people interested in Polish culture. Also I made the mistake of thinking that you would be a mostly friendly bunch even if you would disagree.

It is sad that one or two people have made offensive remarks that are personal but I will pretty much forget them as soon as I finish this post. You do not know me. The non-Polish people who work with me do and they like me. Their opinions are more important. I am lucky to work with them - they are nice, decent friendly people with manners and courtesy. I admire them. Also the one Polish person who still speaks to me is a fantastic person too and I value her opinion more than yours.

Seanus, Justysias, Szwedwpolsce and the one or two others that have not jumped on the bandwagon of trying to make me out to be some sort of monster - I do not include you in my negative view of the website here! I thank you for your support, it is kind of you, especially when it would have been easy to just go with the majority. I have not gone in to specifics out of respect for the Polish people and for reasons of privacy. However, your non-judgemental comments are nice and I am garteful!

Although please don't put yourself in to a position whereby you too get attacked!
You are good people!

I am sorry I can't say that for most people here though. Polish forums is not quite the website I thought it was. Allowing posters to call me an a-hole etc.

Many believe that you have to play hard to get anywhere and they learned that from the West. There will always be those who try and trip you up.

And did you find the answer you were looking for?


You have called Polish people ungrateful, ruthless and rude, they are not words of respect.

Your generalisations are astounding.

it's just a forum, if people choose to attack each other it shouldn't be taken too seriously :). i don't always stick up for Polish people just because i'm Polish, or stick up for girls just because i'm a girl. the bad traits you describe are not typical to Polish people - although those stories keep coming - but i can assure you not everyone from Poland is like this. keep an eye on people who require your help and don't let them take you for a ride that's all, it is difficult but you will learn! and next time you take an interest in a girl, make sure she's single ;).

The statement offered no enlightenment of the reader. It is like saying "I like apples but I don't like pears".

Sound advice! You have to use your nose to sniff out conniving people. They come from all countries. You mentioned Nigeria. Some of their scams give a whole new meaning to the word 'ruthless'. I had to use my contract law skills to get a Director out of some shtook here. Use your instincts/intuition to help the good guys. I knew he was a cool guy, a firm player, and one who'd appreciate my intervention.

I'm sorry - what lies? analizing your writing is now a lie? why post then?


the second statement is just the perfect statement to watch in a cheap film about vengeful perv office admins...

I'm just waiting for a comment from you like that: 'I expected an apology from this forum but since I haven't received one I will fire a Pole'... luckily you are not a manager...

I know exactly what AnglikMan is talking about.
Some Poles in America act the same way. Once they get what they want from you, then you are nothing. You help them get jobs, get their paperwork in order so they can be here legally, get them a place to stay, a car etc. and once they get everything they can out of you, you are not needed anymore and you become a turd.

Of course not all Poles act that way, but it's usually the ones who are less intelligent and greedy for money to show off their friends and relatives in Poland what they have. And once they get situated in Chicago amongst other Poles, they don't need to learn English anymore.

But I have noticed the same pattern over and over with Poles coming to the US.

Perhaps my comment was uncalled for especially on a public forum, but your comments and reasoning is immature. Given the position you hold at the place of your employment you should have know better than let your emotions and personal life choices dictate your ability to make sound decisions on behalf and in the best interest of the employer. You are unfit to hold such position in the first place. What you describe as acts of kindness and friendship can only be viewed as playing favoritism to one particular group simply because you like the girl. Even this so called act of kindness as it was described by you was not a selfish act but rather a sinister plot on your behalf hoping to get something in return. The girl, even willing to bribe her friends and grant them favors to get what you wanted. Believe it or not but this is not professional behavior or that of someone who is mature and rational.

You were and still are willing to use your position for personal gain (read revenge). Those are all signs of a derange mind, not of someone who takes pride in his work, being professional no matter how minuscule his position is, one that keeps his personal life separate from that of business. Where is your impartiality, objectivity and ability to evaluate any given situation on individual basis? You let your feelings do the thinking for you. Since when a relationship that went sour is a national trait for any group of people and how you can make that connection is beyond me. Perhaps you were wronged by someone but that’s no excuse to blame entire group of people. In time your personal feelings expended this hatred of perceived wrong to entire nationality, judging from the title of this thread. Does this sound rational to you?

Since you asked the question opinions were given, yet you still pick and choose the ones you like while dismissing the ones you don’t like. Given the fact you decided to have this discussion on an open forum you open yourself to all kinds of criticism so perhaps you should grow a thicker skin before starting these topics. In conclusion; I can honestly say you have a lot to learn about relationships, mature behavior and professionalism. Try to keep them separate.

Since I take offense to what you have said perhaps I should start a thread how inconsiderate and stock up the Brits are, surely this must be a national trait.

We were made so by our geopolitical situation. Trying to survive between Germans and Russians taught us ruthlessness.