The BEST Guide to POLAND
Unanswered [3]  |  Archives [1] 
 
 
User: Guest

Home / Off-Topic  % width posts: 34

Funny mistakes by Polish users of English


pawian 151 | 7,977    
23 Feb 2019  #1
Strange, I am trying to find the thread where we shared English malapropisms a few years ago but I can`t. It seems there is no such thread at all. Did it ever exist? I remember we had a good laugh at some mistakes. Well, dear mods, get down to work... :):)

Well, here are a few language riddles from my own collection. They are not concocted, just real productions (both speech and writing ) by my students.

1. She is going to join the gym to lose some weights.

2. He has hurt his uncle.

3. Clowns are performing freaks at the circus.

4. What does Masid do on Sundays? He goes to the b..tch.

5. She raped him in a blanket.


Can you guess this one?
My t-shirt is wearing a purple shirt. (wrong pronunciation)
Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
24 Feb 2019  #2
Typical examples of language "transfer" errors, otherwise known as "interference".
Rich Mazur 5 | 3,014    
24 Feb 2019  #3
malapropisms

Thanks to you I learned a new word.

Is "liberal" a malapropism? It means the opposite of how it sounds and is not funny, so maybe it's not malapropism.
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
24 Feb 2019  #4
I hope you won`t develop this little obsession with liberals here. :):)

More

She has just crushed her car.

Yesterday we saw Star Wars - Episode Python Menace.

Rare planets and animal species are disappearing.

London was built my Romes.

Most of my clients are rich and I spend a lot of time in court.
Student`s answer about the job - tennis instructor. :)

We were surrounded by dangerous waiters on all sides so there was no way to escape.

Druids were learned priests and lovemakers, wise men and bards.

P.ISSED TO MEET YOU!

Rich Mazur 5 | 3,014    
24 Feb 2019  #5
Tell your students that "undocumented" does not mean what it says. It means "illegal".
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
24 Feb 2019  #6
And what do you think: is the prescription a receipt or not?
Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
24 Feb 2019  #7
If a Pole goes to the doctor for a "recipe", the attending physician might look at them a little tilt!
:-)
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
24 Feb 2019  #8
No, Lyzko, receipt is much better as it really reminds of Polish recepta - prescription.
Atch 17 | 2,701    
25 Feb 2019  #9
My t-shirt is wearing a purple shirt. (wrong pronunciation)

My teacher is wearing.......??

@Pawian, you might be interested to know that the word 'receipt' was frequently used for cooking recipes up until about the 1940s in British cookery books. Also, 'receipt' was the very old English term for a prescription.
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
25 Feb 2019  #10
Yes, my teacher! Good.

As for the old usage of receipt, now we know where the Polish borrowing comes from .

Bonus for you, I virtually choked with laughter after hearing this one:

It is the first time she has seen such a volcanic erection.
Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
25 Feb 2019  #11
I thank from mountain for that:-)
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
27 Feb 2019  #12
Another set

All my favourite things are in the chicken.

What can you do in Scotland?
I can see Lassie.

I love going to my grandma on holiday because I love her foot.

She had an accident. She was hit by a "Star."

People were hatching noisily, while music was pouring out of the jukebox.

Ghosts are standing around the car, looking at the bride.

Bagingham Palace is a famous landmark.

She behaves like a dam.

He is wearing a liver jacket


I thank from mountain for that:-)

That would suit the thread with Polish idioms in direct English translation more. :)
Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
27 Feb 2019  #13
Amusing nevertheless!
Ziemowit 12 | 3,309    
28 Feb 2019  #14
She had an accident. She was hit by a "Star."

I wonder is anybody living outisde Poland can catch this one.
Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
28 Feb 2019  #15
As "gwiazda" can mean both the astronomical as well as the entertainment variety, specific cultural context aside, I think one might easily see the allusion.
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
28 Feb 2019  #16
Ziemowit asked a good question. To guess that "Star" you must know Polish contexts quite well. :):)
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
28 Feb 2019  #17
If I had a razor, I would shave my bird.

Napoleon lost a bottle at Waterloo.

I always go to chair on Sunday.

Ham is where the heart is.

Cavemen loved in caves.

A policeman must be brave to catch rubbers.

Although his uncle was bothering him, the dancer went on with the show.

Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
28 Feb 2019  #18
If you even bother shaving your bird, make sure then that it's a pocket razor....for a close shave:-)
"Bird" is older US slang for the male organ!
LOL
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
28 Feb 2019  #19
I suppose most Polish pupils, learning about beard, moustache etc tend to mispronounce the word. Some of them continue till they are students plus.
Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
28 Feb 2019  #20
A person can also be a beard as wellLOL

Polish mispronunciation of English, leading to those amusing malapropos mentioned previously, in large measure stems from those fierce consonant clusters along with
gentle "dropping" of the 'r-sound' in words such as "gorzy" > "gAUzy" etc. That almost whirring-type sound scarcely translates into English distinctions like "beard", "bear", "bird", and so forth, as well as pronouncing a word like "perfORmance" correctly. Then of course, there's also syllable stress.....
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
12 Mar 2019  #21
I hope you understand what students intended to say/write:

I am going to travel this somewhere.

Turtles are in danger because people destroy their legs.

Gratings from London.

He was flying a cat.

She is going to attend a soft defence class.

Mr Sheenan works like a sleeve.

Have you phoned your dog yet?

He likes stick and salt.

I like travelling because I like seeing movements of the past.

Chemikiem 5 | 1,480    
16 Mar 2019  #22
I wonder is anybody living outisde Poland can catch this one.

Well I can't. I thought it was a mistake and 'star' was meant to be 'car' initially, but I know it's not right. What is it then?

I hope you understand what students intended to say/write:

In this set, not all :(
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
16 Mar 2019  #23
Star WAS meant as a car. More exactly, a truck produced in communist Poland and after. :)

In this set, not all :(

Probably stick and salt. It was faulty pronunciation.

Not only English teachers have fun with students` funny mistakes. Polish teachers, too. Here are a few remarks concerning Polish literature and the way students perceive it. P.ii.ss with laughter, so called.... )

Po zebraniu makulatury, sprzedaliśmy ją razem z panią.
After collecting scrap paper, we sold it together with our teacher.

Konopnicka żyła od urodzenia aż po śmierć.
Konopnicka lived from her birth till her death.

Zenon kochał Elżbietę mimo, że był w ciąży z Justyną.
Zenon loved Elizabeth although he was pregnant with Justyna.

polandsite.proboards.com/post/1488
Chemikiem 5 | 1,480    
17 Mar 2019  #24
Star WAS meant as a car.

Yay! Even though I didn't actually know anything about the car..........

Probably stick and salt. It was faulty pronunciation.

Yep, I couldn't get that one.
I particularly liked, ' after collecting scrap paper, we sold it together with our teacher', but just as good was the unintentional source proboards.compost!
Pmsl!
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
17 Mar 2019  #25
Stick and salt was mispronounced steak and salad, please.
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
23 Mar 2019  #26
Both spelling and pronunciation mistakes.

There were only donkeys and small fishing bats back then.

Some TVs broke into our house while we were on holiday.

I will be here for a whale.

Do you know the course of the Baskerville family?

The USA is a bike country.

lul bul - | 50    
23 Mar 2019  #27
In early 2000s when I use to smoke I was asked in Poland for FIRE,initially I was like WTF?then I realised it meant lighter or a match to light a smoke.In US we say :"Can I have a light please",I dont know whats right though.
OP pawian 151 | 7,977    
23 Mar 2019  #28
"" I was asked in Poland for FIRE""
Exactly, it is still used by smoking people whose lighters have gone bad. Funny, indeed.
lul bul - | 50    
24 Mar 2019  #29
we still talk about it in family and joke that in todays date you would think someone is attacking you and if you are armed you will pull out your weapon before deciding who to fire at esp when they would just say "FIRE PLEASE"
Lyzko 20 | 6,177    
25 Mar 2019  #30
Off topic I know, but once a German asked me at a party here in New York "Have you please fire?"
Luckily, I knew she was simply asking for a light:-)


Home / Off-Topic / Funny mistakes by Polish users of English

Please login or sign-up on the main page to post in this category!