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How to read the signals from this Polish Guy?

sleepingbeauty 1 | 2
24 Apr 2012 #1
I have a huge admiration for a polish guy for a month. We talks everyday, and i think we are match. If i don't send him a message, he will text me first. He says that he like talking to me. And i feel the same too. After talking for some time, i've found out that he doesn't interested with relationship or marriage. It seems like he likes freedom, but he won't avoid if love comes to him. I'm hoping i could be the one who change his mind set, and will enjoying relationship with me.

The problem is, we haven't meet in person. In next few months, we will meet and he will take me for date. Still not sure if he will come here. I'm not stupid, i know if he really wants to meet me, he would be on plane by now. We have talked about this for couple times, that now its time to know each other. Then if we meet, it just to make sure our feeling and we will figure something out. Long distance relationship can't work.

Last night, he just said that before we meet he would have a date or two, and i can have as many boyfriends as i like. I guess this is fair, the fact is we both are free. Then i replied, that's ok if you explore many women first and make me your last.

My questions here:
- Is that a symptom he loves me (send messages everyday, talks in hours)? Well, its shallow to say 'i love you' online. He would never do that before we meet.

- Do you think he will come to meet me?
- Lately, i've tried not to text him first, and he always text me. Does he really like me/miss me?
At last, i hope he will never read this post!
Specjalista 3 | 43
24 Apr 2012 #2

Whatever you're thinking, you need to meet him first and be safe about it. You can't possibly know someone without spending real time with them first.
jusia9 - | 36
10 May 2012 #3
Specjalista you are right .... first meet the guy ... maybe you wont like him at all !!
OP sleepingbeauty 1 | 2
10 May 2012 #4
Thank you Specjalista and jusia9 you're right.. It's too soon to tell, and i shouldn't get my hopes up..
Powodzenia - | 4
10 May 2012 #5
First, if you do in fact meet him, please be careful. Many relationships now begin online but it is also an easier medium for which people can prey on others. So be cautious, despite what you feel, just to be prepared.

Secondly, I find that when one is interested in another person they haven't really met, it's much more likely they'd speak of ideals (meaning what they'd really like to go for rather than reality). So for him to say that he isn't interested in relationships or marriage (THOUGH it is a common thing to say ... from men ... lol) it's very hard to gauge how much he means that, having not met you in person just yet. I'm not giving false hope, just saying that in general, you may get to know some very basics and very specifics about a person through your conversations prior to meeting, but you really get to know the person after a face-to-face meeting (and those thereafter).

I DO NOT like how he says you can date other men, and you likewise saying he can date other women. You have said a LDR won't work, but often times, relationships started online drag out longer and become LDRs even if you don't mean for them to be. Let's hope that if you two end up meeting and liking each other, that it doesn't become one, because who knows where the boundary might be for you two (especially when you aren't physically together).

And not to poke your bubble or anything, but still be weary. I'm not an expert, but I've found that many people absorb themselves in online relationships but they hold them to a different degree than an actual relationship. While they may show signs of great interest and message you first, it may just be a pasttime thing for them to do that's enjoyable, but they check out once it becomes a true reality. Ideally, if one was so interested, they'd hop on a plane the minute they could just to see you ... but that's not so either. They can have the same hesitations and apprehensions as you might.

I never give good advice because I play both sides, but I guess I'm just saying be weary and cautious when meeting this person but also be smart and read the actual signs given and not ones that you hope to be there.
sointoyou - | 1
10 May 2012 #6
Of course, you should meet him in a person first, but you know there is no recipe for Polish guys or any other guys. Everyone is different and looking for something else, you can't help if he likes you or not. Come what may, let it be... :)
OP sleepingbeauty 1 | 2
10 May 2012 #7
it's much more likely they'd speak of ideals (meaning what they'd really like to go for rather than reality).

Thank you for commented :) Yes, we couldn't make commitment online because it would be silly. I know so many things about him, but i don't even know whether this person really exist or not. Right? Also he said to me "sooner or later we will have a chance to meet i guess, maybe it's gonna be you who will say let's be only virtual friends". I know we don't know what would happen. I just dont want to wait in vain,
tropicalgirl - | 3
19 May 2012 #8
dont expect too much until you meet him in real :)
calgaryimmig - | 7
22 May 2012 #9
"that's ok if you explore many women first and make me your last."
i'm wondering what the boy's reaction is...

yeah, meet him first :)
1 Apr 2018 #10

English girl Polish male friend

Hi I am an English girl with a lovely Polish friend... he is funny, intelligent, amazing and I have a small crush but can't tell if he likes me... he smiles a lot when we're alone and waits for the bus with me to make sure I get home. He gives me his umbrella so I won't get wet and shares little things with me and encourages me to learn more and push myself harder at yoga but I am not sure if it's just Polish politeness or more ...
cms neuf 1 | 1,647
1 Apr 2018 #11
He likes you. Waiting for the bus is going beyond normal Polish politeness. If he is too shy to make the first move it might be because you work together or something ? Maybe you might have to ask him for a date.
2 Apr 2018 #12
Thanks cms Neuf we do work for the same company but not of the same floor/team so don't have to interact.... maybe I will wait a little see what happens and maybe ask him...
3 Apr 2018 #13
Turns out he doesn't like me like that ... just chivalrous ... oh well nvr mind
cms neuf 1 | 1,647
3 Apr 2018 #14
Oh sorry to hear that - at least you won't go on wondering :) plenty more fish in the sea
JP Ding - | 1
16 Jun 2019 #15
I have a polish guy colleague and my other coworkers notice him that he always look at me, happier when I am in the vicinity and more gentle towards me. I just dont mind it as I haven't notice it and dont give malice on it. But when we discuss about professional things, he really do segue and always put topics like inviting for a dinner with candle lights. However, I always reject his offer. As far as I want is to separate professional and personal life. He even text me in a little naughty way (suggesting intimacy). As I answer that it is not that easy. I even say that I feel awkward about the personal messages he give. And he reply that if I am bothered he will stop immediately. He really do stop. We only do have exchange of messages about work and he dont do a personal manefestation of inviting dinner and whatsoever. He invited ones of playing a sport we both love (as always been used to by the office). I thought that he invited the usual people playing so I said that I am on it.But its only me and the other close colleague of him.

Also When we meet in the office, I start to observe him now that he is staring at me, being gentle of me (when he is known to be a hard and rough head), he explains when he cant reply immediately.

I am starting to develop feelings toward him but I doubt if he really do have interest to me or just wanted a hook up. And I am afraid to entertain my feelings or do entertain him since he will be ending his mission in our country and will be assigned to another country.

What should I do?:( Now, I wanted to know him more but I have already rejected alot of his invitation and he stop on relating to me on a personal tone.

In addition, How to spot if a polish guy likes you and you are not only assuming?
Lyzko 42 | 9,134
16 Jun 2019 #16
If it honestly bothers you that much, go and ask him, "What's the deal?" Figure he knows English well enough:-)
Short of that, use smoke signalsLOL
cms neuf 1 | 1,647
16 Jun 2019 #17
I don't know - a couple of times in here I advised people to ask for a date in the normal way and they got blown out of the water ! So now I will probably keep my counsel :)

Maybe we were the last generation where the way to get a date was to comb your hair, brush the crumbs off your jacket and ask for one. All done on social media now ?
Lyzko 42 | 9,134
16 Jun 2019 #18
Not your fault if it didn't work out, neuf.
pawian 218 | 22,822
16 Jun 2019 #19
In addition, How to spot if a polish guy likes you and you are not only assuming?

Do you really think that being Polish makes a guy unique, out of this world, so you really need to look for advice in forums or guide books?

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