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Golden Wedding in Poland, the protocol for giving gift for a wedding?


seccy_ 1 | -
1 Feb 2010  #1
I have been invited to a Golden Wedding Anniversay Celebration (50years of marriage) in Poland.
Can anyone advise on the protocol for giving gifts? Would giving a money gift be frowned upon?
mones
15 Jul 2011  #2
Would giving a money gift be frowned upon?

Not at all. Money is welcome in Poland ;)
Wroclaw 44 | 5,389
16 Jul 2011  #3
money is the last thing i'd give to a couple on their golden wedding anniversary.

if u wish to give a gift to a couple who've been married for many moons and probably feel that they have everything... find out their interests and buy somthing appropriate. or just buy a good quality bouquet.

for some people it's more important that family and guests simply turn up.
Polonius3 1,000 | 12,449
16 Jul 2011  #4
It's a GOLDEN anniversary so a sztabka złota (gold bar) would be the most appropriate.
Linda
18 Aug 2011  #5
Merged: Wedding present for Polish friends - how much money should I give?

My Polish friends are getting married in a couple of weeks. They are planning to make a long trip abroad so they are asking money as a wedding present.

My question is: how large an amount would you give if you were me? I have no idea on how much I should give.
They both have really good jobs and earn well. I'm a single woman, live in the Northwestern part of Europe so I earn well compared to the average Polish salaries.

I appreciate every help.
beckski 12 | 1,617
18 Aug 2011  #6
They are planning to make a long trip abroad so they are asking money as a wedding present.

The same situation occurred for my cousin's wedding. She had requested funds for their honeymoon trip to Australia, instead of a more traditional wedding gift. My family members and I each gave the bridal couple a hundred dollars.
Wroclaw 44 | 5,389
18 Aug 2011  #7
My question is: how large an amount would you give if you were me? I have no idea on how much I should give.

it sort of works out that u pay for your meal at the reception and add a little more.

plus, it depends how close u are and what u can afford.

maybe 400 to 500 zl. that would be from a couple, but probably the same from a single guest.

wait for others to reply and give an opinion.
delphiandomine 83 | 17,531
18 Aug 2011  #8
plus, it depends how close u are and what u can afford.

Exactly. Don't feel pressured into giving anything - give them what you think they should get.

I'm of the opinion that asking for money is exceptionally rude - but if you must do it, then I'd give them the same amount of money as you'd spend on a gift. There's no rules for this sort of thing - in fact, anyone demanding a set amount of cash is exceptionally rude.

200zl is more than enough, anyway - especially as it's unlikely that they'll be paying for the wedding themselves.
nunczka 8 | 458
19 Aug 2011  #9
I agree with Delphi. I too think that their request was rude.. You dont owe them anything.. Give what you are comfortable with.
delphiandomine 83 | 17,531
19 Aug 2011  #10
I too think that their request was rude

Alas, it's dreadfully common in Poland today to demand money.

I've got a golden rule : if someone invites me and demands money, I don't go.

(my own wedding mentioned absolutely nothing about presents or money - to demand otherwise is just utterly classless)
PlasticPole 7 | 2,649
19 Aug 2011  #11
It's not rude at all. I ask which is ruder, asking for money or taking every gift back to where it was bought to return it and cash in?

These folks are just being practical and newlyweds need cash more than anything else.

If you are really close to them and want to stay in their good graces, give more. If they don't mean that much to you, give less.
delphiandomine 83 | 17,531
19 Aug 2011  #12
I ask which is ruder, asking for money or taking every gift back to where it was bought to return it and cash in?

Both are unbelievably rude and unthinkable to anyone with any decency whatsoever.

These folks are just being practical and newlyweds need cash more than anything else.

Practical? What's practical about demanding cash? It's rude and absolutely classless. I think it's utterly disgraceful that people judge others on the basis of how much cash they get - it's ridiculous.

Actually - one of the best presents I got was one of the cheapest, but it was so well thought out - and memorable.

The problem is in Poland is that there exists pressure in the society to have a big and lavish wedding - and they need to demand cash in order to pay for it all.
Romanov 1 | 4
19 Aug 2011  #13
The big lavish wedding is hardly just a "Polish problem" otherwise pointing people toward or offering them the simple solution of a cash gift is in no way "classless" it saves the buyer time and worry and the reciever the unwanted gift. Unless you live in a class ridden Jane Austin novel that is..
delphiandomine 83 | 17,531
19 Aug 2011  #14
the simple solution of a cash gift is in no way "classless" it saves the buyer time and worry and the reciever the unwanted gift

Considering a gift to be "unwanted" is about as classless as it gets.
PlasticPole 7 | 2,649
19 Aug 2011  #15
Usually there's a registry or something with a list of what the couple wants, isn't there? That way gifts are what the couple needs and wants.
pgtx 29 | 3,160
19 Aug 2011  #16
i thought of that... is there a store wedding registry available in Poland yet? i think, in some stores, it could be...?
TheMan - | 56
19 Aug 2011  #17
Considering a gift to be "unwanted" is about as classless as it gets.

You might like the sentiment behind a gift, but if you are newly wed in a one-bedroom/studio apartment then a bread maker, a chocolate fountain and 12 punch bowls make less than no sense. As long as there is no set amount and it can be anonymous then I see no problem with it. We are in a recession and I like practical thinking... but I'd just give the cash that was going to go on their present + a little extra (cos the present would've been cheap :P)
nunczka 8 | 458
19 Aug 2011  #18


AHHH! Gone are the days when that was not a problem.. In the Polish American communities. We had what we called an Apron, Bridal, or money dance. People lined up to dance with the bride donating a donation into an apron held by a Matron. We danced to the tune of Pani Mloda. The danced lasted seconds before another would dance with the bride.As the booze flowed, so did the money.. Life was simple in my day.
Linda
19 Aug 2011  #19
Thanks for all the replies.
I think I will give them 250 zl or something like that.
Or I give them 200 zl and buy them some kind of a small present typical for my home country. If I do so they can't tell the exact value of my present.

I would give them more if they were members of my family and not just good friends and just a couple of years younger than I am.

Asking for money is a little bit rude but on the other, I don't know what else I would give if they wouldn't ask for anything. I mean they have a really nice flat, a car, all the things one needs for a household and so on.
kolechowicz 3 | 4
7 Aug 2013  #20
Merged: What to give a Polish couple as a Thank-You gift?

Cześć! I am in Kraków for the month and have a friend's wedding in Poznań this weekend. I am staying with the groom's family at their home. They are picking me up from the airport and I feel that I should have a small gift for them to say thanks for letting me stay here. What is a nice gift? I already have a bottle of sake (I live in Japan) for them. Any ideas?

dziękuje, bardzo!!
pawian 155 | 8,612
7 Aug 2013  #21
I already have a bottle of sake (I live in Japan) for them. Any ideas?

I thought about a bottle of good wine, doesn`t need to be upper shelf, but sake will be just fine.
Wroclaw Boy
7 Aug 2013  #22
Youre a great help aren't you Pawian.

Aftershave or perfumes are usually welcome, but you may disappoint with the scent. Personally i usually go for something practical, something people will use a lot, for example if somebody bought me a hard drive I'd be well pleased. Maybe find out what hes interested in and grab that, Japans pretty good for techy stuff, right?
Harry
7 Aug 2013  #23
What is a nice gift? I already have a bottle of sake (I live in Japan) for them. Any ideas?

A bottle of Yamazaki whiskey (here in Poland the 12-year old goes for 250zl a bottle and the 18-year old is EUR 150!).
pawian 155 | 8,612
7 Aug 2013  #24
for example if somebody bought me a hard drive I'd be well pleased.

You are so greedy, pal. That`s disgusting.

I thought about a bottle of good wine, doesn`t need to be upper shelf,

Ok, get them a crate of wine bottles!!!
beckski 12 | 1,617
8 Aug 2013  #25
You should give them a nice potted plant, so they could both enjoy it.
chicago_basia - | 3
20 Sep 2013  #26
Merged: Sending wedding gift to Poland; what and how?

I've been corresponding with a 2nd cousin in Poland that I have only come to know in the past few years. (I was lucky he spotted a post I had put on ancestry dot com over 10 years ago!) His daughter was married this past June, and I received an annoucement/"invitation" via email, and while it would have been wonderful to travel to Poland for the wedding at that time, I opted to not go, although the cousin seemed excited to get to meet me. I failed to send a card or anything for his daughter's wedding, and now i feel I must send SOMETHING; a card and ????

I'd love to send like a Visa Gift Card, but I have no idea how that would work, or if that's even possible. Some of the online "gifts to Poland" services have only flowers, booze or wine, or sweets. I know in the US, a young couple is glad for some money, but is it safe to assume that's the same in Poland? I know not to send cash. Western Union? And then, how much? I don't want to come across cheap, but I also don't know the bride, and alternately I don't want to send too much and come across as showing off.

I haven't heard from him since before the wedding, and I don't want to let this go much longer.
Am I off-base thinking there is an obligation here that I need to meet?
thanks from Chicago!
Basia
Monitor 14 | 1,821
20 Sep 2013  #27
It's usual to give 200zł per person as a wedding gift. As a foreigner you will be expected at least double (but of course your case is different, since you didn't take part in the wedding)

What about Amazon Gift card?

There is no Polish department of Amazon, but shopping above 20 eur are shipped for free to Poland from UK.

I think that Western Union or standard money transfer is waste of money. You could alternatively send them with mail prepaid card topped up with some cash and give PIN number through an email. Here such card costs 20zł. PayPal money transfer is free, but you both must have paypal.
chicago_basia - | 3
21 Sep 2013  #28
Thanks for your tips and info.

If I sent a gift card, would I send it in US dollars? I don't have a good idea of how easy it would be to use a gift of dollars in Poland, or if it would be better to find a way to get a card issued in zloty (or euros????) Or, a prepaid Visa or MasterCard?

The couple is young and they appear tech savvy, so amazon gift card would be great, if it works the same way there that it does here?
jon357 63 | 14,076
21 Sep 2013  #29
I don't have a good idea of how easy it would be to use a gift of dollars in Poland,

They don't use Amazon gift cards there at all however dollars are changeable in every town in Poland.
Monitor 14 | 1,821
21 Sep 2013  #30
Read terms and condition but I would be surprised if Amazon Gift card was not accepted for shipping to Poland. I think the gift card can be in any currency, Amazon should handle currency exchange. And the best would be pounds if they want to order from UK or EUR if from Germany. But they shouldn't loose much on currency exchange if it's USD.

And as json wrote, we don't use Amazon giftcard because Amazon is not very popular in Poland, because they don't have polish version of website. But ordering from International version (.com) or German or British is possible to Poland and gift cards should be accepted then.

so the best buy them this one, because it seems that only British amazon ships shooings above 25 GBP for free to Poland.
(amazon.co.uk/gp/help/customer/display.html?nodeId=1204872)

Eligible European Destinations
(Belgium, Denmark, Finland, Gibraltar, Iceland, Republic of Ireland, Luxembourg, Netherlands, Poland, Portugal and Sweden)

Spend to qualify: £25

Can I get FREE Super Saver Delivery if I redeem an Amazon.co.uk gift certificate?
Yes. As long as your order qualifies, you can use your gift certificate and receive FREE Super Saver Delivery.



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