Advice Please! Meeting my Polish boyfriend's parents!! Gifts, customs...

Yes, i know its not British.. and pretty much any dark liquor i despise.. so i dont really know much about them..

But the question was would it be acceptable, or should i keep looking for Ballentines (as when i look on the online shop for supermarkets over here.. they dont have them).

As i said i would go for something that they cant get and is from your country.
Here you have a nice search engine for single malts:

This is an excellent offer for instance: masterofmalt.com/whiskies/glenfiddich-12-year-old-35cl-whisky
oops, thats only a half

Real authentic fish and chips with salt pepper and lemon:)

Might be cold when it gets there :P And have to check that website when i get home.. work for some reason has blocked that site! ><

ahh. ok, spanner in the works.. apparently if i get him whiskey, ill need to drink it with him.. so thats out the question..

So next question..

Do they have bitter (like John Smiths) or a Real Ale in poland?

Thanks

Robbie

Merged: Meeting Polish Girlfriend's Parents

I am getting ready to fly to Poland to see my girlfriend and meet her family. I am from the US and don't have any experience with parents that are foreigners. She told me to bring her dad a bottle of Bourbon and her sister Hershey chocolate. But she said that her mom didn't want anything. I don't want to show up empty handed so I am looking for advice as to a gift idea. Her mom is the only allie I have in dating her daughter because her father(he is a military officer and nationalist) objects to her dating outside of Poland. I just want to make the best possible impression I can and thank them for their hospitality. Thanks in advance for any advice.

Where did you meet your girlfriend?

We were both working for the same company here in the US.

A nicely packaged selection of tea(s) would probably go down well with the mother, something in tin which be used (perhaps as a tea caddy) for years after the tea has been used. If you give loose tea, be sure to also give a tea egg. Poles drink about double the EU average amount of tea.


You sure it isn't your skin colour he's objecting to?

No, I am as German looking as we Americans come and not dragging around your typical American belly. Her mother commented that I look like them.

There are a thread in the PF archives which might be of interest to you.

https://polishforums.com/archives/2005-2009/love/advice-meeting-parents-4302/

that will help with the dad


I think it's a good idea

It seems odd that her dad would object. It seems that most Polish fathers care more about their daughters marrying someone who will provide well for them and generally act like a decent person than where he comes from . Perhaps he is worried that she will never come back to live in Polska if she ends up with you. I think with courtesy and a nice bottle of boubon you can win him over.

Frinde with your father inlaw:

Drink vodka with him - Tell him that "you can not belive" how good drinker he is!

Become very drunk, and let him win the "competition".

Next morning you tell him that you are realy impressed about his abilities and that you would like to doit again sometime!

Do this and you will:
a) Have a friend for ever. (This is just good)
b) Get a drinking problem. (This is just bad)
c) Can not expect to meet your inlaws ever again without getting atleast a bit vasted! (this is both good and bad)

Good advice and a glass or two of scotch or bourbon is always nice... But when it's time for serious drinking, most Poles will tell you to put the coloured spirits away and make room for the national drink: vodka. So with that in mind, you would appear more original and in the know if you showed up with a couple of large bottles of quality American vodka, such as Tito's/Hangar 1/Prairie/American Harvest/Koenig/Glacier (whatever you pick, make sure it is at least 5x distilled to minimise your headache the day after...). Most Poles appreciate good vodka & minimal side effects...

Good luck!

The tea is a great idea. Practicing a few Polish sayings is also a great idea. I'm willing to bet their biggest issue is that their family tree will no longer be Polish. That's just overwhelmingly how mixed cultured relationships end up, especially half way across the globe. Show that you are willing to learn some phrases and this will give them the impression they still have hope of Polish speaking grand children. Ultimately that will go much further than any materialistic objects, American ones no less. Most Americans take pride in how multi-cultured and mixed pot the USA is but Poles take pride in being partitioned, slaughtered and then occupied for 50 years and yet in control of their own destiny today. To see those sacrifices quote "Wasted for a foreign husband" is quite difficult to stomach.

You don't have to get wasted BUT definitely don't attempt to take a high road in terms of alcohol drinking while you are there. It is also in your advantage to get the parents drunk and with that will come out their feelings/concerns. Because Polish culture is probably more conservative/reserved/old fashioned on the first meet up than what you encounter in the USA. But once the door is open, you will be pleasantly surprised. The tough exterior is to run off those that aren't in for the long haul.

Are you, the daughter or her family into spicy/hot food? Taking some hot sauce etc with you would be cool I think. There isn't much of that in Central Europe. It can be your way of showcasing the benefit of the USA melting pot. Because although they said bring Hersheys.....there is much better chocolate over there. Maybe spicy potato chips that you can "have for yourself" but share with them.