UK, Ireland / "These Scottish are only here for the free booze" - Bestman speech at a Polish Wedding [18]


This happened at my wedding. The best man's speech was interminable. Keep it very short. Remember that while the Scots are laughing at your jokes the Poles will be sitting there embarassed. Then the translator will tell them a second hand witticism. Beware.

Avoid the traditional mention of the groom's former conquests. This would not go down well.

Law / Is it possible to get an MOT on a RHD car in Poland? [28]

Is the law clear or not? Can you register a RHD car in PL?

Law / Is it possible to get an MOT on a RHD car in Poland? [28]


I can't imagine why any test centre would be reluctant. The Polish badania techniczne is pretty straightforward. It's not as if you want to change the car to LHD. They usually just test the brakes, steering column, suspension, etc. and have a look underneath.

Food / What's your favorite Polish beer? [870]


Trivia question.
When I was a callow youth we used to say it meant "IP1ss Anywhere", but what do the letters stand for and why that country?

Language / Do English-speakers sound funny when we speak Polish? [49]


Stressed-timed, surely.

Love / Polish girls are outstanding in terms of their moral conducts as compared to western girls. [29]


I had to have a beer to understand what he's saying. I also don't think he's ever met a Polish woman. Either that or he has and he's c-struck.

Life / Giving birth in a state hospital in Warsaw Poland - any additional costs? Advice, experiences? [10]


You paid 6000zł for a pram? How many gears does it have? A/C? CD changer?

Life / Giving birth in a state hospital in Warsaw Poland - any additional costs? Advice, experiences? [10]


If you don't as yet have a policy, wouldn't they view the pregnancy as a "pre-existing medical condition"? Sorry to sound so clinical. Congrats btw.

Work / urgent help with umowa - my boss wants to cancel the contract before 1 month notice period expires [7]

ufo. I bow to jon's greater knowledge of the labour courts, but you still have to ask yourself whether the embuggerence is worth it. If you have a good Polish friend who is willing to file the case (translated, of course), take time off work to hold your hand in court, and argue your case, then you might want to go for it. I'd be inclined (if the sum involved were less than 5k) to inform the employer that she is breaking employment law by not paying you, and initially threatening legal action. If you prepare well, she might see sense; alternatively you might slap hands at 50%. If that didn't faze her, I'd just make sure her name stank all over town, including at the tax, employment and ZUS offices. That would at least give you the satisfaction of knowing she'd suffered as a result of her actions.

Work / urgent help with umowa - my boss wants to cancel the contract before 1 month notice period expires [7]


But does it explicitly say that you are entitled to a month's pay should an event like this occur? You would do better to walk away as soon as you get paid. In my opinion you are on a hiding to nothing. It's not worth pursuing this through legal channels, even if you are in the right. Only the ***** lawyers would win. Put it down to experience. (You could, of course, seek revenge, but I won't put ideas into your head.)

Mods. Why is the word beginning 'w' synonymous with 'prostitute' not allowed?

Work / Is it a good sign if a school seems desperate to hire me? Small town Kęty [15]

Kęty is not too far from Bielsko Biała and pretty close to Kraków. It's also near Oświęcim/Auschwitz. I wouldn't worry too much about being isolated.

I'd advise you to ask for 50PLN net and be prepared to come down a bit if you are new to teaching. Make sure that they take care of all the legalities, including health insurance, and it is reasonable for you to expect at least some help with accommodation. Ask them for their schedule for the school year. This way you'll be able to work out how much you'll actually be paid (is that 20hrs/week guaranteed?).

Food / What's your favorite Polish beer? [870]

I had no idea it was there, and Malmeda is a stone's throw from where I work. I'll check it out soon. Cheers. Malmeda is also home to a great Hungarian restaurant called Tokaj. They give 30% off if it's your birthday. I recommend 'Burning Head of the Devil.'

Food / What's your favorite Polish beer? [870]


+1


Probably just as well I don't live in Warsaw. I'd be a gibbering bar fly by now.

Work / Is it a good sign if a school seems desperate to hire me? Small town Kęty [15]

Hi CMC. They're offering you very little and they know it, which might explain their enthusiasm. When you consider the many holidays there are in Poland, a full month's work would be rare. Remember, they won't pay you for the long Christmas break, or the two-week 'winter holiday' at the end of Jan/beginning of Feb. Are they offering free accommodation? Tell them you've taken advice and need more. Also, make sure you have an exit strategy. Go with enough funds to enable you to walk away if you don't like it.


It is unlikely that you'd be teaching hayseeds. Local doctors, lawyers, etc. and their kids will be your students. My first students in Poland, in a similar-sized town, included the children of accountants, doctors, teachers, businesspeople, and an internationally-known artist. These kids might well have been taught at a good local school by young, highly qualified English teachers. Some of them will have a firm grasp of English grammar. Make sure you do, too.

Your name suggests you are 25 years old. Is that right? Did you have a telephone or Skype interview? Are you qualified to teach? Where is this place?

Food / What's your favorite Polish beer? [870]


Hoppy bitter, strongish but not too sweet.

Life / How and where do I return empty alcohol bottles in Poland? [17]


They will always be with us. You can see them from Geneva to Mumbay. My feeling when asked for a pair of grosz is, "If my life was like that, I'd need a drink, too."

As for soap, I've just got back from the supermarket, where I was twice knocked back by the aroma of two well-dressed people.

Food / What's your favorite Polish beer? [870]


Looks like a great shop, but I'd need convincing that anything there can beat Abbot Ale. Could you recommend a few names from the website?

Life / How and where do I return empty alcohol bottles in Poland? [17]


We save ours and take the aluminium to the złom place. I think it's worth about 5PLN/kg, but we usually swop it for kitchen rolls. Only in PL.

Food / What's your favorite Polish beer? [870]

Very wise. Once was enough for me. Oh, how I regret not buying all the Abbot Ale from Lidl when I had the chance.

Food / What's your favorite Polish beer? [870]

Ever had a Warka Strong hangover?

Life / Is there anywhere in Warsaw I can contact regarding my missing parcels? [11]


I was both in that case, i.e. I sent something to myself. Surely, if a parcel is registered and has to be signed for, it's easy to see the last link in the chain. Then again, Poczta Polska is kafkaesque at the best of times.


I thought Amazon, etc. were pretty good about guaranteeing refunds for disappearing stuff.

Life / Is there anywhere in Warsaw I can contact regarding my missing parcels? [11]

I'm going back several years now, but when a parcel of mine failed to appear I filled in a form at my local PO, stated the value of the goods, gave them proof of postage, and about two months later I was paid the full amount.

Life / What type of gift should i buy for my hosts in Poland? [22]


Absolutely horrible, unlike plums in chocolate from Solidarność (Solidarność Śliwka Nałęczowska). The perfect Polish gift.

Work / The pros and cons of working at a small Language school ( Tarnowskie Gory ) [5]

60,000 isn't that small. You'd have lots of things to do there. It's also spitting distance to Katowice, so if you need city life, it's not far. Smaller places give you a better idea of a country than big cities. TG has a long and interesting history, and the area is different from the rest of Poland in many ways. I've lived and taught in several capitals and a few small towns, and I reckon the best of both worlds can be had by living in a town near a city. You get the friendliness of a small place, and access to the bright lights.

Life / What type of gift should i buy for my hosts in Poland? [22]


But wait until a lady offers her hand first (if you are a man).


Yes. They always say, "Oh, don't bother," but it's just part of the ritual. Take them off, whatever they say.


A student of mine recently denied being at all superstitious, but when I suggested he shake hands across the threshold he said, "OK, you got me there".

This superstition runs deep and should be remembered.
If they open a bottle, pace yourself. There's no disgrace in drinking only half a shot when the more macho guests knock back the whole glass. Stay sober. The women will not look kindly on a guest who has to be poured into bed.

Life / What type of gift should i buy for my hosts in Poland? [22]


Rude people coming from Italy with a bottle of Galliano are always welcome at my place. I haven't had a Harvey Wallbanger for ages.

You're probably right, though. Not everyone drinks. It's better to bring something that everyone can enjoy.

Life / What type of gift should i buy for my hosts in Poland? [22]


Why do you advise against that so strongly, Jon?

Food / Are hallucinating mushrooms legal to consume in Poland? [5]

If you find, e.g. psilocybin mushrooms in the forest, who can stop you eating them?

Work / Advice on Teaching English in Poland [709]

Not where I live, i.e. Poland.

Work / Advice on Teaching English in Poland [709]


Not everyone. You won't have a problem. Even in people's homes smokers often go outside to smoke. People drink everywhere in the civilised world. You should be used to that by now. They won't force you to drink here.


Show me a country where the people say they are paid enough. Nobody need be chronically hungry in Poland. Yes, a lot of people are very poorly paid, but most have enough to live on.


It has changed enormously.


Study-shmuddy. Most of the anti-semitism is either the casual ignorant stereotyping of the illiterate, or the incoherent lies of right-wing politicians. Among the educated young you won't find much.


Poland doesn't need your help. Don't come with that attitude. Come to do a job. You won't end up dead in a dumpster. This is not America. If you are serious about teaching English in Poland, get a teaching qualification, preferably RSA/UCLES CELTA. Then come in September and start looking. There's plenty of good advice on here. Take note.