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Polish girls in England.


edelweiss1 2 | 22  
29 Apr 2009 /  #1
I wanted to place the subject here to see the negativity of the replies to this post, I gather most of the polish girl's do not like England. It is after all an Island that has many different cultures that live on the Island. Some maybe worthy of being here and then again some mabe not so worthy to be here. It is a country that in some places is a downright mess and other places that are very nice. Polish people and girls in particular should know that all countrys with all places have the good and the bad.

England as an Island has it's fair share of good and bad and to this point it is the same as the people,to generalize and think and say (as I have noticed here) that English men are bad and English women are bad is a really sweeping statement that is comparable to one saying that all Polish women are after your money and only look for someone who has wealth established in them and their family.

I understand that two different cultures coming together to form a relationship is not easy and as been said on here before it can and usually does take time for this to happen and during this time there can be some really hard times. I and my ex-partner have had a fair share of these and so I write my words with only the brief (approx 12 months) experience of this. However that experience has been dogged with mis-trust that inevitably led to our break-up.

And so to the point that English men & Women are generally not good "as has been said on this forum many times before,remember people will break-up,divorce , separate for many different reason's and that does not just happen in the U.K . I feel that a person who believes this is an England phenomena is a really short sighted individual with no knowledge of life as a whole,no wider experience of people on this planet. For as humans we are born as individual's with individual mind's. There are really good friend's of mine who love their wives/husband's and children and family's etc etc etc and they are English. Their are German friend's of mine who have separated,divorced are single mother's etc and also Polish who have the same situation's in their live's so before as a Polish person you place a derogatory comment about English people , I would suggest you have a long hard think about mankind as a whole and give it some summing up before placing your post.

If we had no error's in Life we would never need to make improvement's and with improvement's everything can be better. And if you feel this so strongly that you do not like the country of England you have the option> go elsewhere and try to find what you think will be paradise. Paradise is what you make it and not thinking it.

Thank you/Dziekuje.

ps; "To the girl I loved (you know who you are ;) who has now gone out of my life,I only want you happy and if this is without me then it has to be like that. I am hurt but I accept".
JustysiaS 13 | 2,240  
29 Apr 2009 /  #2
i'm sorry your relationship didn't work out, but i don't quite see the point of this thread other than letting some hard feelings out . i hope you feel better soon. if there was no trust then it's a good thing it's over now. you never know what life will throw at you, i don't think it would make much difference if your ex wasn't Polish, you'd still feel disappointed and bitter, but if this helps you then alright. i like England so as much as you don't like Polish people generalising and stereotyping British people and their country, it would be fair if you didn't do that yourself regarding Polish people.
osiol 55 | 3,922  
29 Apr 2009 /  #3
I have actually found that if the family likes you, you have probably crossed one of the biggest cultural hurdles. The other big one can be language. That's where I have found the biggest problem. If you can't easily discuss how you feel with eachother, a relationship will be strained. In the past, I couldn't understand how so many people would come to PF asking for translations, simple or difficult, of messages sent by boyfriends or girlfriends in a language not shared by both people in the couple. I have since been guilty of asking for a small number of translations, even though, for an Englishman, my Polish isn't all that bad. Above average, I'd say!

Anyway, long ago I used to hang around with a lot of artists and art students. I went out with a woman for a while who was an artist. That turned out to be a big mistake. I haven't spent very much time with artists since then. Not that I'm saying all artists are bad...
Kapusta 2 | 66  
29 Apr 2009 /  #4
if the family likes you, you have probably crossed one of the biggest cultural hurdles.

Yes this is true.

Its a bad feeling when your beloveds family take a dislike to you especially if it's because you're from a different country. However, it can be worked on.
osiol 55 | 3,922  
29 Apr 2009 /  #5
There are many many culture gaps in the world far wider than between Poles and Britons. There are cultural differences within Britain that are almost as great.

Every relationship involves give and take. Some people don't know how to give, others actually find it difficult to take. Reaching a balance isn't easy, particularly when there are differences. However, I believe that some differences are essential in any relationship. It does help though, if both can communicate on something approaching an equal level.
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
29 Apr 2009 /  #6
Kapusta, it is also a shame when a family take a dislike to you because you are 39yrs and daughter 25yrs. And that I have a daughter. And that I am from the U.K .

JustysiaS, I do not mean to generalize,however it seem's to be inset in the mind's of polish women that English men are not good people,please correct me if I am wrong with this view ?
Kapusta 2 | 66  
29 Apr 2009 /  #7
Perhaps they were worried for their daughter because of those things. They may have wished for their daughter to meet a fresh Polish man of her own age and this is the idea they have in their head. So when you arrived in her life you situation was not what they wanted for their daughter. I think it's sad that they couldn't be persuaded that you could be OK for her. Now you must move on though.
Pani_Polska - | 89  
30 Apr 2009 /  #8
as a Polish person you place a derogatory comment about English people

I guess you dont see the Russians and Brits who slam Polish people on this forum as well?

And so to the point that English men & Women are generally not good "as has been said on this forum many times before

The same has been said about Polish people

Some maybe worthy of being here and then again some mabe not so worthy to be here.

Terms such as "worthy" make you sound elitist although I am very sure you are not such a thing, you are heartbroken and for that I am sorry

Polish people and girls in particular should know that all countrys with all places have the good and the bad.

Everyone knows it even if they dont admit it

I wanted to place the subject here to see the negativity of the replies to this post, I gather most of the polish girl's do not like England

I will say that is not true, that is an overgeneralization. One girl breaks your heart and you blame the rest of us :( :( I'm sorry about what happened to you, people in every nation of every culture and ethnicity need to be more fair and understanding to one another. This is not Poles v. Brits or anything like that. People carelessly use words but that doesnt apply to any culture or nation as a whole.
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
30 Apr 2009 /  #9
pani_Polska > I read your replies and understand each one that you say. My summarisation of the polska girl's view-point on the English is entirely what I was told by my ex-gf' who of course was polish. It was repeatedly said to me by her how the English were not good at this (relationship/marriage etc etc) and that the country is not good etc etc ,I must say that there are thing's that I agree with her ,example:I do find that inner city's & town's etc are very un-tidy or un-clean and sometimes the system that is here (England) makes you wonder who on earth makes the decision's and put's them in place.

When I alway's return from my adopted country in Europa back to England in my vehicle ,my shoulder's sink and I think "uh back here again :( however you may say "well dont be here,then"!! There is a very good reason as to why I am not leaving England at this time as my Mother has a Grade 4 Brain Tumor & has been given 3 - 12 month's to live> hence, it is not possible to leave her/England at this time.

I have the intelligence to know that not all Polish girl's/Men feel this way about England and I feel no anti-polska feeling's within me as I have friend's (polska) who I help if they need some help with something. However I placed my initial post as what I was told and what I have read here and heard some polish say about the English prompted me to place the post that I did ,to gauge what people would say about it and their feeling's.

I almost certainly do not regard myself as an elitist that term is very in'accurate of me . I am just an ordinary guy who has had mis-hap's in life (has'nt every-body ;) and work's hard etc etc and keep's pushing the wheel's of his life forward as best he can at this hard time in my life. All our wheel's in our live's become shaky from time to time.

I am just trying to know as to what Polska girl's feel about England (not about me:) as I am interested to know if they feel the same as I have been told.
ShelleyS 14 | 2,893  
30 Apr 2009 /  #10
am just trying to know as to what Polska girl's feel about England (not about me:) as I am interested to know if they feel the same as I have been told.

Why do you even care, if they don't like it here you can't change it, I would imagine for the most part people are not here for the weather our food or our culture since they slag all of the aformentioned off on a whim, they are here to earn money, if they could earn what they earn here in Poland then they would be in Poland, simple really.
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
30 Apr 2009 /  #11
ShelleyS > I care because my mind want's to learn. I will Learn by reading.
ShelleyS 14 | 2,893  
30 Apr 2009 /  #12
I dont think it's possible to learn about the mentality of a whole nation without living there for a considerable amount of time.
hairball 20 | 313  
30 Apr 2009 /  #13
England as an Island

England as an island?? Best you go and check a map dude! I think the heathans :-) to the north of Newcastle will have something to say about that. And of course that minority race of sheepshaggers at the end of the M4 might be wondering what you mean too!

edit:

Sorry to hear your relationship failed. Many between Poles and Brits seem to work very well;

Me; Seanus; JustysiaS; and Wyspianska to mention but a few!
Pani_Polska - | 89  
1 May 2009 /  #14
I almost certainly do not regard myself as an elitist that term is very in'accurate of me . I am just an ordinary guy who has had mis-hap's in life (has'nt every-body ;) and work's hard etc etc and keep's pushing the wheel's of his life forward as best he can at this hard time in my life. All our wheel's in our live's become shaky from time to time.

Its all good Edelweiss, I wasnt trying to attack you, I just hope you understand many Polish girls, like me, are nice and rational :D
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
1 May 2009 /  #15
Pani-Polska , dziękuje .. ;)
Wyspianska  
1 May 2009 /  #16
Me; Seanus; JustysiaS; and Wyspianska to mention but a few!

hahaha. It was working untill I realised Joe is a c*unt :-)

Some points here are valid though. Osiol mentioned a family as quite possible danger for a relationship. I will agree, especially if your boyfriend is a mommy boy haha.
Pani_Polska - | 89  
1 May 2009 /  #17
Proszę, Edelweiss! Best of luck to you, keep your head up :)
MaxChin - | 10  
1 May 2009 /  #18
I had a polish girlfriend, since two weeks ago we broke up and i feel pretty bad. Because she was dating with another polish guy as the same time with me. I really dont know what she is thinking about. I really dont know why she did that to me, she hurts me so deep. Even though we broke up, I cant stop sending message to her I miss her so much. I hate her, but I love her as well.
time means 5 | 1,310  
1 May 2009 /  #19
break ups suck max. look on the bright side at least you were not married, it cost me a fortune (divorce) :-)
Cardno85 31 | 976  
1 May 2009 /  #20
hahaha. It was working untill I realised Joe is a c*unt :-)

Always good to notice that relatively early...after marriages and kids it can be a bugger of a thing to realise.
JustysiaS 13 | 2,240  
1 May 2009 /  #21
i think i might be switching to welsh guys lol
Cardno85 31 | 976  
2 May 2009 /  #22
Us scots are a decent bunch too!! :P
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
5 May 2009 /  #23
well. I see the welsh and the scots that are here understand (maybe not ;) that there are good leaves on a tree with not so good ... (that is not a jab by any mean's :)

MaxChin > keep your head busy and involve yourself in thing's to stop your mind from dwelling on thing's which are past. You cannot change a wound to your head but your head can change a wound .

keep busy and have a good spirit on your shoulder .
niejestemcapita 2 | 561  
5 May 2009 /  #24
I see the welsh and the scots that are here understand (maybe not ;) that there are good leaves on a tree with not so good .

what are you saying exactly?
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
5 May 2009 /  #25
good leaves & bad leaves , good heart's & bad heart's .
niejestemcapita 2 | 561  
5 May 2009 /  #26
hmmm yeh but what are you saying about the Welsh/Scots?English.....I don't really understand your point? Also if leaves doesn't get an apostrophe, how come heart's does?

English grammar is not an issue. Please note, English is not everyones first language.
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
5 May 2009 /  #27
niejestemcapita > you not think it is clear that I am saying there is good and bad in *all nationalities not just scottish,welsh,english,wallones,espana,ireland etc etc etc but *all ,as was mentioned previous in this topic by a different member earlier .

ps; also if I was wanting an english lesson at this time of night then I would be going to my course at college for an english lesson and not for my choosen subject.

It is understandable that the english language is not very understandable to many people including the english .

anyway it is late . goodnight.
niejestemcapita 2 | 561  
5 May 2009 /  #28
you not think it is clear

no it wasn't clear at all, or I wouldn't have questioned you, obviously.

I rather thought you were doing that anti English thing, where the Scots Welsh and Irish are wonderful fun loving people, oppressed by the nasty stupid English. If I was mistaken please forgive me, I just know that certain nationalities are suckers for that kind of thing.
OP edelweiss1 2 | 22  
5 May 2009 /  #29
pps; No I was not doing any anti-english thing as you suggest. Why would I uh .. you do not know me so do not judge me. My mother's family are from Ireland. nr Cork. My Best friend in Australia is Welsh.

So I am sorry to dissapoint you but you are rather hopelessly in-correct. But as you are a teacher then you will have to disagree. again goodnight and pleasant dream's to you :))
niejestemcapita 2 | 561  
5 May 2009 /  #30
It was repeatedly said to me by her how the English were not good at this (relationship/marriage etc etc) and that the country is not good etc etc ,I must say that there are thing's that I agree with her ,example:I do find that inner city's & town's etc are very un-tidy or un-clean and sometimes the system that is here (England) makes you wonder who on earth makes the decision's and put's them in place.

I am not judging you I am merely reading your rather silly posts.........forgive me about the apostrophes but I do detect a certain anti english ness to your posts.

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