I'm writing this because I would have found it helpful to read before going so I'm going to do the same in case there is another one of me out there. I don't speak or understand polish.
1. Go to pks.warszawa.pl and find your bus trips schedule.
2. Write "Proszę bilet w jedną stronę do Przasnysz v 17:45." on a piece of paper. Go to the bus station and ask the lady behind the glass if she speaks english. When she says no, hold your paper against the glass. (Replace Przasnysz with the city of your choice and 17:45 with the time you chose from the bus schedule)
3. Keep giving her money until she gives you a bus ticket.
4. Flip your piece of paper over and write "Czy to jest autobus do Przasnysz?" (Replace Przasnysz with the city above). Approach a young person, when they reply 'no' to your english question, hold up your trusty ol' piece of paper and your bus ticket. They will give you concise instructions on where to go. But because you don't understand a lick of Polish, you only walk in the direction they looked first. Walk for a little while.
5. Repeat step 4 until your helpful aid says, "Tak."
6. If you have a big bag, throw it under the bus. (Not right under where it will get run over, but in the bottom storage area).
7. Get on the bus and show your ticket to the driver. This is the moment of truth. Now you must use your keen skills of reading body language and voice intonation to determine if he's welcoming you aboard or telling you to get off.
8. Ignore the seat number on the ticket, just plop yourself down in the first available seat.
9. Every bus station should have town's name written on it. When you see your town's name, wait for the bus to stop, get off the bus and retreive your bag.
PKS Bus Ticket
