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Polonius3 1,000 | 12,446  
22 Nov 2008 /  #1
What kind of jokes or joke crazes are the most popular in Poland at present? In the commie era there used to be policeman/miliatimen jokes. Now there are blonde jokes, even knock-knock jokes. Are any others popular in terms of joke convention or topics?
Wroclaw Boy  
22 Nov 2008 /  #2
I liked the picture posted here by a forum member:

It was a picture of god at heavens gates, requesting: Pesel, Regon and Nip.
OP Polonius3 1,000 | 12,446  
23 Nov 2008 /  #3
Is the "poszła baba do lekarza" (an [old] lady went to the doctor) series known in any other countries? The milicjant (communsit policeman) jokes were known throughout the Soviet bloc.

Examples: Poszła baba do lekarza z żabą na głowie. "Co się stało?" - pyta lekarz, a żaba: "Jakaś baba mi się do d*py przykleiłą!"

(An old lady with a frog on her head visited a dcotor: "What happened to you?" the doctor asked. The frog replied: "Some old lady got stuck to my a*se!)

Thread attached on merging:

The commie era was great for jokes. Milicja jokes, Breżhnev and Jaruzelski jokes, Poak, Rusek & Niemiec jokes, etc. Eg, why are Jaruezlski's lips so red? Because Brezhnev's got haemorrhoids. Public toilets would have wall writing that had an arrow pointing to the toilet bowl and the inscription: Tu produkuje się ser dla ZSRR or Tu fabryka miodu dla przyjaciół ze Wschodu. Alas, now there is only pornographic stuff and on the imieniny circuit -- mainly blonde jokes. Anyone know of any other jokes currently circulating in Poland? Any Obama jokes? This one is told in America. Obama didn't know what to wear to a fancy-dress ball, so he decided to strip naked, shove a broom handle up his behind and go as a fudgicle, capturing 1st prize.
Wroclaw 44 | 5,384  
1 Jan 2009 /  #4

Absolutely not. It must be nine or ten years since I heard anyone tell a joke.
Seanus 15 | 19,706  
1 Jan 2009 /  #5
You didn't hear about the new law against jokes, P3? ;)
OP Polonius3 1,000 | 12,446  
1 Jan 2009 /  #6
And here I thought all alolg that the Tusk gang had a sense of humour?!
Seanus 15 | 19,706  
1 Jan 2009 /  #7
Because the Tusk gang are jokes, it doesn't mean that they tell jokes ;)

Just kidding, I'm neutral on Tusk as, well, he is very neutral and gives people little to discuss.
OP Polonius3 1,000 | 12,446  
2 Jan 2009 /  #8
Maybe bland is a more apt description? When you've got your sights set on the presidential palace (in 2010), it's better not to rock too many boats.
pawian 178 | 16,078  
2 Jan 2009 /  #9
What kind of jokes or joke crazes are the most popular in Poland at present?

No jokes anymore. We are dead serious currently. After all, we have a crisis, don`t we???
ladykangaroo - | 165  
2 Jan 2009 /  #10
Breżhnev and Jaruzelski jokes

Now there are plenty of Kaczynski Bros. jokes.

Try this site:

It's one of the most popular sites in Poland and they do have quite decent English version although it covers maybe 10% of their material (you need to click on the flag in the right top corner for English). The forum there, which is the most important part of the site, is mainly Polish, but they also have English section:
OP Polonius3 1,000 | 12,446  
2 Jan 2009 /  #11
Thanks Ladykangaroo. Some of these are quite funny. My question is: do many Poles still tells such jokes at prywatkas (I hear they've renamed them domówki), imieniny, etc.? Is their an age divide -- eg those under 30 are less likely to tell jojkes or whatever? And finally, what do those who don't tell or listen to jokes

laugh at?

Thread attached on merging:

Some say people don't tell jokes anymore or that only guys like Jay Leno and stand-up comics still do. Know of any good Polish jokes? Not ANTI-POLISH "POALLCK" JOKES, but jokes told by Polish people about themselves or anyone/anything else. Admittedly, many lose a lot in translation. Such as:

Mam teściową na sto dwa. Sto metrów stąd i dwa metry pod ziemią.
102 does not mean super-good in engliash so right there the jokle falls apart. Besides, an English speaker would probably say "six feet under" rather than two metres below ground.

Jasio is running with a bucket of petrol, and explains that the school is on fire. "Then why the petrol?" someone asks. "Because it's dying down," he replies.

A highlander is holding his mother-in-law over a cliff and says: "My granddad hacked his mother-in-law to pieces with an axe, my dad poisoned his, but I love my mother-in-law so I'm setting her free (puszczam ją wolno)."
gumishu 11 | 5,740  
28 Apr 2009 /  #12
Little Johnny comes to school and is asked by the teacher why he had been absent from school the day before. 'I had to bring a bull to a cow' little Johnny replied. 'Couldn't your dad do it?' asked the teacher. 'No - it had to be a bull'. :)
poli - | 9  
28 Apr 2009 /  #13
Dlaczego kobiety udają orgazm? myślą, że kogoś to obchodzi:-)

Actually, even if jokes were unpopular for some period now they are back:-) I'm not sure that others will share my sense of humour. Hope, some will.
Seanus 15 | 19,706  
29 Apr 2009 /  #14
Surely Tusk ;)
mafketis 29 | 9,861  
29 Apr 2009 /  #15
"at prywatkas (I hear they've renamed them domówki), imieniny"

Can't say I've heard 'domówka', 'impreza' seems to be the all-purpose expression but I move in a non-party-giving crowd.

imieniny (sadly) have been steadily decreasing in importance and birthdays (urodziny) have been steadly increasing in popularity over the last several years. It's probably paart of the general (and very traditional) tendency to look down on homegrown traditions and idealize western ones (more British than American now - generally things American are just not cool anymore.)

young people now, as far as I can tell, don't care much about imieniny (I'd be glad to hear I'm wrong).
poli - | 9  
29 Apr 2009 /  #16
young people now, as far as I can tell, don't care much about imieniny

You're right, but the generation of 40-30's still remember about this.
mark007 - | 58  
29 Apr 2009 /  #17
A distinguished polish professor of psychology, fed up with mind-numbing theory, sets up his own fast food restaurant. He calls it Kentucky Fraud Chicken.......

...People say its mother ******* good!
southern 75 | 7,096  
30 Apr 2009 /  #18
May 1, 09, 00:22 - Thread attached on merging:
Polish humour

What jokes do polish people tell each other?
gumishu 11 | 5,740  
1 May 2009 /  #19
i don't know what jokes people tell.
i just have one to tell hehe

a long one heheheh

three women meet for a cofee or similar

one of them with hearing problems

they talk some random things

one says: hey, look, didn't your housband go fishing yesterday.
I saw him carrying some stuff to your car. You know some angles, buckets. And he was wearing rubber boots.

the other says: yeah, he sort of goes fishing from time to time

does he bring anything back home?

well, he does - the other says - and shows with her pointed fingers a size of a postcard

oh, I get it

wait, but I've seen your man go out fishing quite often
and he always takes plenty of stuff with him
he seems like a serious angler, isn't he?
nights out fishing and stuff

that's right, he's a serious one

I'm sure he can bring some good fish back home, couldn't he?

Weeell - the other women shows an admirable size of a fire extinguisher (not the car variety of course) - he mostly brings home stuff this size

Then the third one - the one who does not hear so well breaks her silence and says...

Look girls, this is not that important after all, the most important is if he's got a heart
hancock 1 | 95  
5 Nov 2009 /  #20
A cop pulls over this car full of people the fellow starts to shake
" I, I, I, s swear I wasn't speeding."
"O course You weren't. I know that. Your the 1000 th guy Ive pulled over and you won
"a thousand bucks. "
"O great now I can get myself a lisence"
"Look what youve done now you idiot.I told you not to get drunk" his wife says
Then the Granny from the back seat screams "I knew something would happen when you stole this car."

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