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Posts by szarlotka  

Joined: 20 Feb 2007 / Male ♂ 		Last Post: 20 Oct 2017
Threads: Total: 8 / In This Archive: 7
Posts: Total: 2,206 / In This Archive: 1,417 		From: UK
Speaks Polish?: Nie
Interests: Skiing, mountains, music, reading, taking the mickey and terrapins

Displayed posts: 1424 / page 5 of 48
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szarlotka   
23 Apr 2009
News / Why Polish police officers have to look like dorks....? [43]

The problem for me with the new garb is that I would misintepret being arrested by one of them as an attempt to sell me the Big Issue or being given a parking ticket and end up with an resisting arrest charge or being shot.
szarlotka   
20 Apr 2009
UK, Ireland / What is in Poland that England doesn't have? [142]

I stand corrected, but the ones around me are lousy. Badly kept beer and often watered down. Yes I know it's illegal but they do it.
szarlotka   
20 Apr 2009
UK, Ireland / What is in Poland that England doesn't have? [142]

Also check out the weatherspoons pub chain where you can still get a pint for 99p.

... but if you want beer, it's best to avoid this lot... if on the other hand you want to drink a pint of coloured water then feel free to part with your 99p....
szarlotka   
20 Apr 2009
Real Estate / Foreigners: Please don't buy Polish Land! [823]

Time to close this thread. Nobody has any money to buy Polish land any more, unless we all pool what's left of our savings and club together to buy a few square metres. We could plant a few herbs and vegetables and eke out a meagre existence.
szarlotka   
16 Apr 2009
Love / Polish men vs German men: Who is hotter? [513]

admittedly I don't find her especially attractive

Each to their own BB. I think she looked naturally stunning without the model glitz and makeup. Mind you I am easily pleased.

Bit violent on here tonight don't you think
szarlotka   
16 Apr 2009
Love / Polish men vs German men: Who is hotter? [513]

you really want to tell the people you've seen all 40 Mill german women personally???

It's a labour of love that even Southern would be proud of...

I once saw Claudia Schiffer in person. Only 39,999,999 to go
szarlotka   
16 Apr 2009
Love / I can't trust Polish women any longer - where to meet a foreign girl? [123]

Jeez I must have got lucky. I trust mine implicitly and have done ever since I met her. Not once has she ever betrayed that trust. Mind you she has had the odd temper tantrum, usuallly when I've deserved it though. Maybe it's a generation thing?
szarlotka   
16 Apr 2009
UK, Ireland / Poles claim UK benefits after working only one year instead of going home [156]

Or maybe it's the incompetent representatives elected in a democratic process?

Lol, The trouble with democracy is that any old looney can stand for election and with voter apathy only has to secure about 25 votes to be elected. There are hundreds of examples in the House of Commons. Benign dictatorship seems attractive at times.
szarlotka   
13 Apr 2009
Life / What should Poland and Poles do, after first day of nuclear war? [133]

Apocalypse + 1 - go look for uncontaminated water, fail, drink Guinness instead

Apocalypse + 2 - Guinness runs out, now it's getting serious. Look for casual sex buddy. Fail as all likely buddies fall apart at first touch. Reduced to drinking Fosters, Officially now a very serious situation.

Apocalypse + 3 - No sex, no Guinness, Fosters gives me the runs. Decide to end it all but can't find the paperwork. Ask a policeman but told to **** off as there are other survivors to worry about.

Apocalypse + 4 - no hair, no water and radio stations playing old Tony Blackburn shows. End it all without the paperwork.
szarlotka   
6 Apr 2009
Food / How to Cook and Eat an Artichoke? [32]

Glad the artichoke thing worked out for you pgtx.

I was watching one of those celebrity chefs doing something with artichokes the other day on the TV. It did come to mind that we should have a thread on how to choke an arty cook;) Some of them are so pretentious.
szarlotka   
3 Apr 2009
News / Poland..wake up to a multicultural world [1059]

and shagged all the Rolling Stones?

What all of them? Even Charlie Watts? I would have thought one of Carla or Charlie would have been died after that ;)

Maybe Mr Obama should have been presented to the Pres's latest minister. Can't remember her name but she is rather scrumptious. (No doubt she also has a mind like a planet but we've not been intoduced yet!)
szarlotka   
2 Apr 2009
Love / Chatting up Polish girls in the street. [60]

Right. It's so public spirited of you to put yourself through it all time and time again. I award you an honourary MBE for services to mankind.
szarlotka   
2 Apr 2009
Love / Chatting up Polish girls in the street. [60]

I tell them:''If you need to eat,to sleep,to relax and to sh1t,then you simply have no time for picking up girls.You have to synchronize.''

Is this the unlocking of the mysteries of synchronised swimming? Isn't there a danger of abstaining from emptying one's bowels backfiring with one of your hot dates. Like big fart no Southern.
szarlotka   
31 Mar 2009
News / Polish driver follows GPS directions into lake ! [30]

I want one with a female French accent...

Top notch.

"Hi Szar, where would you like to go today?" would reduce me to a quivering wreck ;)

Polish woman satnag, always thinks she's right. you know she isn't, but it isn't worth arguing about...

Lol. It might be best if we all kept a low profile for a few days.
szarlotka   
31 Mar 2009
News / Polish driver follows GPS directions into lake ! [30]

Especially some nagging woman..

Yep. satnag.

"For God's sake I told you to turn left at the last junction, Do you know how much fuel you will waste getting back on track now? It's not the first time you've ignored me. When will you learn you useless pillock?"