Lately, I've also been experimenting with some Polish vodka
Experimentation gives rise to innovation. Good luck, sir.
I don't think it's just what you eat, but how you eat it and what you do to burn it all off afterwards. I eat quite a few large breakfasts with very high meat content, but I do manual work so it soon disappears.
You can't beat British food... Fish and Chips
You didn't mention pies (hot or cold), sausage and mash, bacon sandwiches, black or white puddings, kippers, roasts (especially pork, lamb, beef, pheasant, with roast tatties and Yorkshire puddings), bread and cheese, bubble and squeak, cauliflower cheese, scones, kedgeree, and so on and so on. British food should be more interesting than it is. A lot has been lost over the years, but a lot also just gets ignored. I'm sure there are some very nice Polish dishes that had British equivalents that died out. We should eat more Polish food over here. So what about worries about getting fat - junk food seems to be far worse. We have more of it here and people are getting fatter all the time.
Moms are awesome
But not everyone has one, so you reach the stage where you just have to learn to do it for yourself.