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A typical Polish American wedding


nunczka 8 | 458
17 Oct 2011 #1
Recalling how we 1st generation Polish Americans enjoyed our wedding celebrations.. We did it our way.
The music was by an Irish American. Jimmy Sturr.. He loved Polish culture.


delphiandomine 88 | 18,163
17 Oct 2011 #2
The music was by an Irish American.

Rather authentic, I'd say.
hythorn 3 | 580
17 Oct 2011 #3
absolutely charming

thank you for sharing

it fact I will go further by saying you have a lovely looking family

the dancing was great, the costumes looked superb and everyone looked to be having a wonderful time

utterly enchanting
JonnyM 11 | 2,615
17 Oct 2011 #4
Looks lovely!
OP nunczka 8 | 458
17 Oct 2011 #5
I am sorry to say that weddings like this are rare in America today. With the original Immigrants already gone and we 1st generation poles aging, the 2nd generation has failed to know the culture of their parents. When our parents came over from Poland,they could not speak English.. We kids picked up the polish language from them as they learned to speak English. As we learned together we started using slang words. This caught on and is prevalent in America today. The 2nd generation kids failed to grasp any of the old culture as our parents started to master the English language. By time the 3rd generation came on. They have no knowledge of Polish customs.
Ironside 53 | 12,560
17 Oct 2011 #6
Rather authentic, I'd say.

What do you mean by authentic?

I am sorry to say that weddings like this are rare in America today.

Thats life, communities are disappearing all over the world.
By the way all the best, to You and Your family!
delphiandomine 88 | 18,163
17 Oct 2011 #7
They have no knowledge of Polish customs.

Consider them lucky - if they had, we would be laughing at them for embracing 100 year old customs that don't exist in Poland.
Polonius3 994 | 12,367
17 Oct 2011 #8
Is there some high-falutin, e-Gatesian, hihg-tech explanation for the poor quality of this YouTube? Why so jerky -- like still pictures strung toegtehr rather than a smooth-running film? The audio portion is also pretty poor.
JonnyM 11 | 2,615
17 Oct 2011 #9
high-falutin, e-Gatesian, hihg-tech

Probably a hand held cine camera.
Jimmu 2 | 156
17 Oct 2011 #10
Come on, we all know that in the US or Canada people would say "You must have gone to a lot of trouble to make such beautiful costumes!" and in Poland they would say "What? You can't afford a new suit?" lol
hythorn 3 | 580
17 Oct 2011 #11
By time the 3rd generation came on. They have no knowledge of Polish customs.

surely they must still crack the wafers on Christmas Eve?

no one expects them to follow all Polish customs to the letter but they must retain some of the more major ones, surely?

the easiest customs to retain are the ones which involve rolling up at a Polish restaurant and taking in the decor and ambience
OP nunczka 8 | 458
17 Oct 2011 #12
the easiest customs to retain are the ones which involve rolling up at a Polish restaurant and taking in the decor and ambience

NO! It hurts me to say that by the 3rd generation all knowledge of this is gone.. There are still a few places like Chicago with new Immigrants coming in, that some of it still goes on.. But not on the scale that we 1st generation remember,.. Yes we celebrated Wigilia,and sang Koledy with the old folks..But today that is all gone.
beckski 12 | 1,617
17 Oct 2011 #13
how we 1st generation Polish Americans enjoyed our wedding celebrations

Nice video, thanks. I only got through the first dancers portion so far (14.28 mins.) Will watch the rest when I return from work :)

We did it our way

Finally watched the rest of the video. I liked seeing the various generations participating in the dancing; especially the two older ladies dancing together. Was this your actual Polish wedding or a wedding you had attended?
FUZZYWICKETS 8 | 1,879
19 Oct 2011 #14
People in the USA don't do weddings like they do in Poland. My wedding was in Poland and it was off the chain.
Meathead 5 | 469
19 Oct 2011 #15
NO! It hurts me to say that by the 3rd generation all knowledge of this is gone.

I'm from Chicago and have been to many Polish-American weddings and I've never seen costumed dancers like this. I think the Old First generation Poles would have laughed at this. Most Polish American weddings had a polka band and the attendees doing the polka. But everybody would be dressed like everybody else. No old world costumes. This is like at German restaurants where they wear lederhosen (sp?) and those Alpine hats. Pure caricatures. This is not a typical Polish American wedding.
OP nunczka 8 | 458
19 Oct 2011 #16
Finally watched the rest of the video.

Beckski.
No. This was not my wedding..I found this on youtube.. Other than the apparent high cost of this wedding,with Jimmy Sturrs whole bamd and the costumed dancers.. It must have cost a small fortune.. This wedding took place in the 80s..There was a lot of money made in those days.

In my days 1947 . We could not afford that type of wedding.. But we had a 4 piece that performed very well. We ALSO had four costumed dancers from our local Sokoly. They came and did a beautiful job. To help to pay the cost of my wedding we resorted to the money dance, Sometime known as the (Bridal,apron dance into which money was placed in an apron held by a Matron to dance a few steps with the bride.).I dont know what the did in Chicago, but this was how we did it on the east coast



This is not a typical Polish American wedding.

Now I can understand why you are named MEAT HEAD
Ironside 53 | 12,560
19 Oct 2011 #17
NO! It hurts me to say that by the 3rd generation all knowledge of this is gone..

Hey isn't it your fault as well, Sir?
hythorn 3 | 580
19 Oct 2011 #18
careful you do not insult a very sweet and charming elderly Polish American lady

I would leave this thread well alone
Ironside 53 | 12,560
19 Oct 2011 #19
careful you do not insult a very sweet and charming elderly Polish American lady

He is not a lady.
I'm only pointing out the obvious, what is insulting about that?
hythorn 3 | 580
19 Oct 2011 #20
I got mixed up with somebody else

you are right

... slopes off feeling rather embarrassed....
OP nunczka 8 | 458
19 Oct 2011 #21
I'm only pointing out the obvious, what is insulting about that?

LOL! Does a sweet old Dziadek count? Charming not.. At times I can be a DIABEL.

I just cant figure out why there is so much criticsism to this thread. Why cant it just be accepted as a very nice presentation rather than find fault. Maybe it is because the phrase Dumb Pollacks came from.
hythorn 3 | 580
19 Oct 2011 #22
.... I sloping back onto this thread, feeling rather embarrassed

wise words indeed Sir

I was utterly charmed by the wedding video as I have said several times

It appears that perhaps people found fault with it for the following reasons:

1 they are morons
2 it appears that Sean Penn did not direct the wedding video - which seems to have caused some criticism
3 they expect third generation immigrants to preserve the traditions of their forefathers in spite of marrying with partners with other cultures
4 they perhaps expected your family to create some sort of pre WWII Polish community in the style of Brigadoon or the Amish

I was most taken by the dancing, if I had been dragged across the dancefloor at that speed I would have tripped over my feet and face-planted

and more than once

good on you
Ironside 53 | 12,560
19 Oct 2011 #23
Why cant it just be accepted as a very nice presentation rather than find fault.

Because of your comment, eh!? (Could that be so simple? -yep!) \
OP nunczka 8 | 458
19 Oct 2011 #24
t appears that perhaps people found fault with it for the following reasons:

Like you. When i first discovered this clip on the net, I was so overcome by the entire production,that I just felt like sharing it with others. little did I expect the criticism that it created. But just like someone on here mentioned that times were changing. I agree. But no one can take the memories away from for the memories of years gone by. I will leave with my head held high for my love of Polish Music done in American style.. I will exit with another one of my favorites.


Polonius3 994 | 12,367
21 Oct 2011 #25
From the start of the 20th century what set the typcial PolAm wedding apart from the mainstream American WASP-style ones included the following:
-- PARENTAL BLESSING at the home of the bride; bride & groom-to-be plus close family and friends gathered at bride's home; the couple knelt as both sets of parents bestowed their blessing; no Anglo-saxon superstition about the groom not seeing the bride ahead of chruch..

-- TRANSFER TO CHURCH, depending on distance by foot or vehicle.
-- NUPTIAL AT CHURCH; after the nutptial the bride often left a bouquet at the side altar to the BVM where she knelt and prayed before rejoining her spouse in front of the main altar.

-- PHOTO BREAK: bride & groom go to photographer's for wedding portrait; this allows guests to assemble at reception site;
-- BREAD & SALT WELCOME at entrance to reception site.
-- BREAKFAST RECEPTION: usually a more mdoest affair for 100-150 family and closer friends; food was regulary savory PolAm dinenr fare: roast chicken, gołąbki, kiełbasa z kapustą, etc., deserts, open bar.

-- BREAK
-- EVENING RECEPTION: usually larger 200-300 or mroe guests; Polish wedding March (often a selection called 'Pożegnanie z Ojczyzną'); grace by clergyman; more sumptuous feast than breakfast reception, punctuated by repeated chants of gorzko, gorzko (or glass-clinging) for newly weds to kiss.

-- FIRST DANCE: bride dances with her father.
-- BALLROOM DANCING to a Polish orchestra which later (around mid-century) became known as a polka band.
-- DOLLAR DANCE: male guests make a cash donation to dance with the bride; an attendant would provide a nip of vodka and cigar to each male dancer before he gave the bride a whirl round the dancefloor.

-- OCZEPINY (becapping ceremony): ritual removal of veil and replacement with a smybolic wife's czepek (cap) symbolising a maiden's final transition to wifehood amid ritual ditties sung by seasoned female wedding mistresses.

-- TO THE BITTER END; Unlike the WASP weddings at which teh bride and groom would rush off at midnight or even earlier leaving guests ot their own devices, as a sign of resepct PolAm newlyweds would stick around till the last guest left .

-- POPRAWINY: one, two or more days of follow-up celebrations usually at the bride's home but also at the groom's.
I ŻYLI D£UGO I SZCZĘŚLIWIE!!!


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