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What did I do wrong? A Polish girlfriend doesn't want me to send her anything?


aphrodisiac 11 | 2,443
9 Dec 2011 #31
just apologise and hopefully you will remain friends

omg, really? WHy would he apologize, since she was the rude one.
Lyzko
9 Dec 2011 #32
Totally agree with you, Pam. I'm from the States and probably our respective "Anglo-Saxon" politeness would preclude breaking off something soooo abruptly without even the possibility of negotiation, wary or not-:) If this woman's as "fluent" in English as Sniezyk claims she is, she might have added "I think we're moving a little too fast here!", or something of this nature. If this is simply not the Polish way, then maybe Sniezyk might have consulted PF, for instance, before leaping head first into an on-line relationship/chat with a Pole. Certainly I'm not blaming anyone.

Like the old saying goes "Once burned, twice shy!"
OP sniezyk 2 | 18
9 Dec 2011 #33
omg, really? WHy would he apologize, since she was the rude one.

I thought the same thing...
Lyzko
9 Dec 2011 #34
I think so too. The onus is clearly on her, not Sniezyk.
OP sniezyk 2 | 18
9 Dec 2011 #35
Damn Lyzko your an American!!! Which state?
polmed 1 | 216
9 Dec 2011 #36
She was expecting at least a diamond ring not just a small souvenir , thats why she got so mad, hehe .
Havok 10 | 912
9 Dec 2011 #37
Havok
You can stick that gold medal up your ass buddy.

It takes a real genius to copy a word and paste in the Google search to find out what it means....

Yep, apparently you can stick those gifts up your ass too. She don't want’em. What don't you get?
Seanus 15 | 19,706
9 Dec 2011 #38
I don't like making generalisations anymore on the forum, very very seldomly. I see how wayward they can be. However, I can permit myself one here. Don't expect a lot of gratitude for things offered. Now, I have seen some Poles show it which means it's not a black&white issue but I've been struck at how ungrateful people have been here where a Scot would be almost kissing the person out of gratitude.

I mentioned the 'flip' syndrome. I really give no women here any cause as they will take it and blow it up. 'Robić z igły widły' is sth many seem to revel in. Making a mountain out of a molehill. They lead boring lives and this gives them the drama they need to make it semi-worthwhile.
OP sniezyk 2 | 18
9 Dec 2011 #39
ep, apparently you can stick those gifts up your ass too. She don't want’em. What don't you get?

Get a life

Cut the personal stuff, please. Both of you.
pam
9 Dec 2011 #40
WHy would he apologize, since she was the rude one.

i am not saying she wasnt rude, wnat i am saying is that she is maybe unsure as to your intentions, and maybe panicked a bit? maybe she does have someone else in her life..who knows? on the face of it you did nothing wrong, but if she felt that offended and you want to stay friends with her, maybe try and see things from from her point of view? also striking up friendships over the internet is bound to be fraught with problems. you cant really say you know this person..
OP sniezyk 2 | 18
9 Dec 2011 #41
Pam

I never said she was rude, I just didnt understand what happened. I really dont care if she is married with four kids. We are friends, we talk, we laugh, its just fun. She said she doesnt mind if I write letters to her but she didnt want me to send anything....

We are just talking about a couple American t shirts and a book.......thats it...

So if she is married or whatever I really dont understand because we have never talked about any kind of relationship ever...so I dont know why she would hide that from me because we are just friends..

I dont know, Im at the point now where I dont care...We still talk, everything is fine between us....I just thought the experience was weird....
pam
9 Dec 2011 #42
We are just talking about a couple American t shirts and a book.......thats it...

ok sniezyk, dont worry about it too much. hopefully you will both stay in contact. maybe other posters are right, could just be a difference between cultures. you are a new member on this site and i can see youve had a bit of flak. dont let this put you off. i have only been a member for a couple of months, and i can honestly say 99% of posters who have answered questions for me have been nothing but helpful. its really a good site...spoko
Seanus 15 | 19,706
9 Dec 2011 #43
She was wrong for second-guessing your intentions which were clearly good. This is the main point! Sure, we can always grant some women extra leeway for their emotional outbursts but to be angry at you for what you 'did' is just odd.
pawian 177 | 14,597
9 Dec 2011 #44
She was wrong for second-guessing your intentions which were clearly good.

No, they fekking weren`t, as he thought that after sending her American stuff, she would make sex with him over the Internet!
So he was fekking wrong~!

He believed that repeating the American colonists` way of dealing with primitive Indian tribes would work again. Glass beads for Manhattan? No way!
Seanus 15 | 19,706
9 Dec 2011 #45
How could you possibly know that, pawian? Pawian, you are too much of a nice guy and top quality poster that I don't want to set you straight but, perhaps unwittingly, you have just shown the very unfortunate trait that I see in Poles. Their suspicious nature makes them see the worst in sb. They will try and catch you out and, frankly, I find it disgusting! Poles can't deal with me because my intentions are always good yet they still try and trip me up. Time to back off and perhaps see that sb from outside of your country has genuine and sincere intentions??!!
OP sniezyk 2 | 18
9 Dec 2011 #46
No, they fekking weren`t, as he thought that after sending her American stuff, she would make sex with him over the Internet! So he was fekking wrong~!

LOL HAHAHA This is the funniest thing I have seen all day!!!! Yes desperate American must send shirts and book for cybersex hahahahhahaha
pawian 177 | 14,597
9 Dec 2011 #47
LOL HAHAHA This is the funniest thing I have seen all day!!!!

My job here is clowning around and I get paid commission for each amused member. Thank you. Can you contact mods and tell them you have been entertained? My wages depend on it.

Yes desperate American must send shirts and book for cybersex hahahahhahaha

Why did you send Sztuka Kochania by Michalina Wisłocka then?
pam
9 Dec 2011 #48
LOL HAHAHA This is the funniest thing I have seen all day!!!! Yes desperate American must send shirts and book for cybersex hahahahhahaha

at least you have made a big impression with maybe a first post? spokoloko,lokospoko :)
Seanus 15 | 19,706
9 Dec 2011 #49
Don't play into their hands, sniezyk. They are just waiting for that. With attitudes like that, I'm not surprised that men fook 'em and leave 'em.
OP sniezyk 2 | 18
9 Dec 2011 #50
You know I really thought it would be nice to get to know Poland and its people but after just a few days here I no longer have any interest as I can tell many of the people are mental. Not to mention I have no idea what the moderators at this website do since they allow this garbage to go on.
pawian 177 | 14,597
9 Dec 2011 #51
How could you possibly know that, pawian?

My grey, almost white hair tells me that.

s

Pawian, you are too much of a nice guy and top quality poster

Stop this sarcasm of yours!

that I don't want to set you straight but, perhaps unwittingly, you have just shown the very unfortunate trait that I see in Poles.

Each nation has certain negative traits. Had you expected to meet angels before coming to Poland?

Their suspicious nature makes them see the worst in sb.

Yes, we are suspicious. Too many times some wise guys tried to take advantage of us.

Time to back off and perhaps see that sb from outside of your country has genuine and sincere intentions??!!

Impossible. Foreigners who send presents to Polish girls are perverts.

Not to mention I have no idea what the moderators at this website do since they allow this garbage to go on.

Stop abusing moderators in PF. They are the greatest of all! You have no idea what you are talking about. Newbie to forums?
Seanus 15 | 19,706
9 Dec 2011 #52
That's not you!

No sarcasm there. Again, a misreading ;)

My wife is an angel. Sheesh! ;)

Do you know the OP?

Perverts? Funny that as I think guys like sniezyk who send gifts to Scottish girls may have good intentions. I don't automatically assume the worst.
rybnik 18 | 1,461
9 Dec 2011 #53
I concur. The chick's stuknięta (cukoo). You'd be well-advised to stay clear. As Seanus says "move on".
Des Essientes 7 | 1,291
9 Dec 2011 #54
Perhaps it is the close genetic identity between Poles and upper caste Indians that accounts for this woman's refusal. Yogins and yoginis do not accept gifts from anyone because doing so makes them beholden to the giver and thus further chains them to the wheel of samsara from which their yogic practice is attempting to extricate them.
Seanus 15 | 19,706
9 Dec 2011 #55
As the Poles would say 'she has a cat', LOL

DE, good attempt at an explanation but Poles don't see themselves in that way. In Japan, they have o-kari (indebtedness) but they don't flip at the gift bearer unless he comes with combs, LOL ('shi' is comb and it signifies death).

Simply put, it's an overreaction.
pam
9 Dec 2011 #56
You know I really thought it would be nice to get to know Poland and its people but after just a few days here I no longer have any interest as I can tell many of the people are mental. Not to mention I have no idea what the moderators at this website do since they allow this garbage to go on.

they are not mental,but i had a bit of stick before. just grow a hide...and absolutely do not give up posting.i think you just happened to pick a subject open to interpretation. certainly dont think i am mental yet, just give me couple years on this site....:)
pawian 177 | 14,597
9 Dec 2011 #57
You know I really thought it would be nice to get to know Poland and its people but after just a few days here I no longer have any interest as I can tell many of the people are mental.

So get out of here. We don`t need wet blankets without a sense of humour.

Funny that as I think guys like sniezyk who send gifts to Scottish girls may have good intentions. I don't automatically assume the worst.

You should.
Police rescue Scots girl after abduction from holiday villa
French police rescued an abducted 12-year-old Scottish girl after she was snatched from her holiday villa and taken to an airport by an internet pervert.


heraldscotland.com/police-rescue-scots-girl-after-abduction-from-holiday-villa-1.914116
Des Essientes 7 | 1,291
9 Dec 2011 #58
DE, good attempt at an explanation but Poles don't see themselves in that way. In Japan, they have o-kari (indebtedness) but they don't flip at the gift bearer unless he comes with combs, LOL ('shi' is comb and it signifies death).

Seanus you aren't Polish and so I doubt your claims regarding how Poles do, or do not, see themselves. Every gift, regardless of where it is given, brings indebtedness. Your claim that this is only a Japanese way of seeing things is myopic.
OP sniezyk 2 | 18
9 Dec 2011 #59
Des Essientes, is this true? Do Poles believe they will be in debt if something is given to them, even out of friendship?

Pawian, please stop sending me private messages asking me to be your boyfriend, I am not gay....You may be into that but Im not....

Actually the funniest thing about the internet is the large balls and big mouths people grow when they are sitting in front of a computer, because I promise you....no I GUARANTEE you if your in the same room with me in real life your looking down at the floor with a quivering lip.....
Des Essientes 7 | 1,291
9 Dec 2011 #60
Des Essientes, is this true? Do Poles believe they will be in debt if something is given to them, even out of friendship?

Snowy, all human beings, that are honest with themselves about how social relations work, believe this, because it is true.


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