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Such a Very Sad Loss.. fighting the battle with a Polish lady to see my daugher.


edelweiss
31 Oct 2010  #1
So here it goes again Second Time round, I will keep it short this time and only post as I am a little baffled. Met Polish Lady of 39yrs. (Same age) seemed balanced ,I Liked her and very short but asked her if she wanted to move in after an exceptionally short time & she did.

All was well however money was tight due to a broken wrist of mine on the Left and Serious problems to the Right wrist-bone (removal off). however I did small works hence small income. I managed but as I said,it was tight.

In the short 6 month's we were together she contributed after approx one month and I did say that if you have no work and are unable to contribute then dont worry. We will get by simple.

My Mother died at just 59 yrs on the 1st September (Last Month) after a Long Ill'ness and it has been really Tough for me as I have no connection with my Father. I was miss-informed on the time of the Funeral and as a result I missed it. As well just 3 day's ater my Mum's Death my Partner went back to poland. On the way to the Airport I did say "Can you just Let me know that you arrived safely). I came home and sat until 02:00hrs in the Morning and had nothing. 5 day's passed and Nothing.

After visiting a friend of her's (Thank you) and explaining that I was concerned I received a call from her to say "I am fine. Will you Pick me up when I return". I said "sure". And she returned.

Thing's were ok'ish however I needed to have conversation's to say how I was feeling about Losing my Mother and just to Talk as a Companion. Conversation's were very Little and I felt concerned that maybe I was Losing her.

She placed a Massage card in the Polish shop's and although I felt a little uncomfortable with it I tried to help her get a place in an established shop but she never took it. But she started to come back from work? ..and would go straight to the bathroom and place her panties in soak in the sink very often (Not just once monthly),Skype contact's you would not see but they could see her? She would say they had no cam' but a different time they would then again (same person?) would not. Different name's supposedly same person alway's asking to be added as a friend to Contact's List, uh I just dont know.

Lastly, I tried to help her with something on her phone,whilst doing this I found a message from a man whom was working for a Medical Charity raising money in the Town Center. He had asked for her Mobile Number and she gave it and he was sms'ing her. (I have been told that that should not happen as it is illegal to do so), I was sitting with her when I noticed this and when I tried to explain that this man should not be asking for personal phone number's and that he (Luke) would be doing it with the next girl and the next girl etc etc she threw a Major Angry Fit.

She said she will Move out the Next Day :(( I felt Shock & did not wish to argue with her so I went out for a drive. I returned 2 hour's later and she had packed everything. I went to bed and after approx 40 minutes of Laying there thinking "what on earth is happening to us" I got up and said to her "If your going to Leave me I cannot bear to try and sleep knowing you bag's are packed and your leaving tommorow" if you going to Leave me Leave Now. She shouted a Load of Abuse at me and then Punched me Full Bore in the Face. I walked away and then returned saying I should call the police. I did not want in my heart to do this but at the time I felt I should. She grabbed her bag's and Left. The Police were called however I wish to speak with her to say "Look after everything I do not wish the Police to prosecute you" If she as she has choose to Leave me then so be it I cannot change this. After 3 day's I have had nothing from her and tried to call her (this morning)to say the watch I bought for her is still here does she not want it & an old small antique matt which she brought from her home is still here do you want it? But She did not answer and so what now ??

Lastly in her defense,the Last 3 month's have been very very difficult for me in breaking my only good wrist and as a result Losing my work (Customer's) as I am self employed as a gardener. Losing my Mother and see'ing her in a Terrible state due to an Aggressive Brain Tumor that drained her Soul and eventually her spirit then Life. Fighting a Court Battle to see my Only daughter from the english Mother as I have not seen her for 7 yrs now she is 8yrs. I know I have not ben as Loving and Warm as I usually am due to Closing myself in as when I have Tried to talk to her in how I feel I have got Nowhere due to her supposed Lack of English.

I wish her to know that despite my saddness over the Last few Month's I have Never Once Stopped Caring for her even Now I feel Sadd'ness coupled with Love at my Loss.

I am sorry to express my hurt here but I try to find some warmth to my Heart as it has died in how I am feeling...
enkidu 7 | 623
31 Oct 2010  #2
I am sorry for you.
But why do you write all of this?
This is the PF. What do you expect?
wildrover 98 | 4,452
31 Oct 2010  #3
Met Polish Lady

Thats all you need to write really....we can guess all the other stuff....

They are not all like this of course....i believe in Poland there are currently six women still available without these kind of problems... but four are gay...
OP edelweiss
31 Oct 2010  #4
Interesting,Thank's for your message's of reply. I guess I wrote it here as I wished to express something which I in turn found strange hence;did not understand & now most probably never will.
Patrycja19 63 | 2,700
31 Oct 2010  #5
Sorry to hear of your loss, nothing in the world can take that pain away, posting here
prob helped express some of the bottled up feelings, and its true, we cant do anything
except listen/READ.. so to speak.

IMHO you shouldnt subject yourself to more of your polish lady right now. she apparently
is not worried about your feelings at the moment, and whether she is a friend or more
any human with a heart should be willing to sit and listen to someones hurt, the most
important is the listening, thats how friends work.

they dont necessarily have to offer advice, but give a solid ear. because when something
needs to be vented or just getting it off your chest, its that good friend whos there, that
you know will be there thru thick and thin..

heal your hand and heart, do what you can to keep busy, and remember its ok to have
loved someone.. its part of life, we love our family, and others who come into our lifes
dont take that as a bad thing and throw your emotions into a direction that is unhealthy.

once you get back to yourself, go out and meet others, its easy to say It I know, but
whats the better solution? staying in and letting your mind take over again? no you
have to be strong. there will always be obstacles in our lives and we have to leap over
them otherwise they take over.. being strong doesnt mean not having feelings, it means
taking control of your life, not letting those demons take over.

Love yourself first..take care of NUMBER 1

Hugs and Prayers.

P
f stop 25 | 2,513
31 Oct 2010  #6
She is abusive. Forget about her. Everytime you start thinking about her, get busy with something else. It will get easier as time goes on, as long as you don't dwell on it.
shewolf 5 | 1,077
31 Oct 2010  #7
I know I have not ben as Loving and Warm as I usually am due to Closing myself in as when I have Tried to talk to her in how I feel I have got Nowhere due to her supposed Lack of English.
I wish her to know that despite my saddness over the Last few Month's I have Never Once Stopped Caring for her even Now I feel Sadd'ness coupled with Love at my Loss.

You had the right to feel sad after the losses in your life and if she had really cared about you, she would not have left you or turned to another man. I just don't think she deserves to know that you care for her or that you're sad without her.
Pinching Pete - | 558
31 Oct 2010  #8
i believe in Poland there are currently six women still available without these kind of problems... but four are gay...

..lol, they probably don't like beans either. Polish babes are nutters in general - No matter where they reside.
Seanus 15 | 19,706
31 Oct 2010  #9
Pat19 gave you sound advice. Take care of no1 here as you will be stung otherwise. Putting all your eggs in one basket with a woman is almost destined for failure.
noreenb 7 | 557
31 Oct 2010  #10
edelweiss
Losing my Mother and see'ing her in a Terrible state due to an Aggressive Brain Tumor that drained her Soul and eventually her spirit then Life.

I'm sorry for you.
I don't like when people say that an illness harms soul. It does if we think so. I have always believed that human has as many strenght as it is in his mind, not soul. If you think, that a cancer harms soul, you become a loser.

You have to change your point of view at Your mother illness, death, Your lost and Your past in general.
I hope you will be fine pretty soon.
Just try to think over this what has happened to You. Try to look at it from a different point of view. Use Your imagination. Think about Youself in three months ahead. Do You still want to suffer and come back to the past? It is the easiest way to go.

These ones, who passed away do not think and feel in our way (at least, we don't know if they do), we feel pain here. But remember that nobody expects it from us. In our culture this is a normal state of mind.

I don't know if you need time to come back to Your tragic past. I hope You do know it.
shewolf 5 | 1,077
31 Oct 2010  #11
You have to change your point of view at Your mother illness, death, Your lost and Your past in general.

I think he needs to mourn the loss of his mother. His pain won't go away that easy.
noreenb 7 | 557
31 Oct 2010  #12
Yes, you're right.
Everybody needs his own time to mourn an important person.
But sometimes the feeling can be shorter, just at the time when I want to suffer less and not as long as most of people used to.

This is his decision.
It depends only on him and nobody will help him with this feeling.
I can only feel compassion for him.
f stop 25 | 2,513
31 Oct 2010  #13
place her panties in soak in the sink very often (Not just once monthly),

ok.. this is amusing
is this a sign of cohabitation or just traveling light?
wildrover 98 | 4,452
1 Nov 2010  #14
place her panties in soak in the sink very often

Have you suggested Tenna lady to her....??? works for me...
f stop 25 | 2,513
1 Nov 2010  #15
Tenna lady

what on earth is that?
Wroclaw 44 | 5,389
1 Nov 2010  #16
tena lady sanitary towels
Patrycja19 63 | 2,700
1 Nov 2010  #17
I think he needs to mourn the loss of his mother. His pain won't go away that easy.

I lost my mom 8 years ago, and I still feel like a piece of my heart is missing..
David_18 68 | 982
1 Nov 2010  #18
The problem with you is that you're to nice to her. Some women like a strong partner, i mean if she even dare to punch you in the face it kinda shows that you were her bi'tch. Don't get me wrong i really feel you man.

Best thing you could do is to forget about her and next time you find someone of your liking try to make sure she ain't the aggresive type.

It's plenty fish in the sea mate!
Barr_2009 1 | 252
2 Nov 2010  #19
ah another Polish girl acting like shiit, and stopped talking.. remember man, it's just a COINCIDENCE :) :), but you're not the only one to experience odd and not so fair behaviour from them. Two Polish girls I knew, in a row, one a girlfriend, the other a friend, both for about 8 months, both stopped talking, unable to talk to solve anything.

Oh and yes, I agree with above post, NEVER be too nice to a woman. I did this with my Polish 'friend' last year. All that got me was to be ignored sometimes and then totally. Be mean, within reason!
Patrycja19 63 | 2,700
2 Nov 2010  #20
Oh and yes, I agree with above post, NEVER be too nice to a woman. I did this with my Polish 'friend' last year. All that got me was to be ignored sometimes and then totally. Be mean, within reason!

scorned men.. you know what, you prob shouldnt date any women cause it sounds like
your going to be abusive and thats pretty sick.. I dont disagree that people do some stupid
shyt, this falls into that catagory, you and her both need a swift kick in the dupa.

grow up.
Barr_2009 1 | 252
2 Nov 2010  #21
eh? It's true, never be too nice, people take advantage. e
jT81 - | 5
2 Nov 2010  #22
scorned men.. you know what, you prob shouldnt date any women cause it sounds like
your going to be abusive and thats pretty sick.. I dont disagree that people do some stupid
shyt, this falls into that catagory, you and her both need a swift kick in the dupa.

grow up.

He said be mean within "reason" and any reasonable man should not put up with such **** from a woman. Fight fire with fire.
Patrycja19 63 | 2,700
2 Nov 2010  #23
yeah, so he should just not date someone like this, why would you stay and be mean
when you can find a normal relationship without all the stupid drama.

saying fight fire with fire, only leads to abuse in the end from both, you think thats the
answer??

There is plenty of good ladies out there who are very nice and dont deserve the
( mean type) man who would play this game .. if thats how it is, dont bother.

domino effect only causes more problems. treat people with respect, if you dont get it
then leave, they will get the picture once your gone and the next guy comes along and
leaves too. and if they dont, well thats not your problem now is it.
chefneedshelp 2 | 37
2 Nov 2010  #24
woah polish women are nuts just came over to wroclaw to see her and organise movin over and she dumped me no reason wouldnt speak to me since i got here on sunday ha ha ha ha what ann ass
Barr_2009 1 | 252
2 Nov 2010  #25
ahh man that's sad, did she uh... stop talking to you?? shh, I say nothing... :( :) :)
Paulina 9 | 1,448
2 Nov 2010  #26
Edelweiss, that’s a sad story :( You have my sympathy and I hope you’ll feel better as time passes.

I have Tried to talk to her in how I feel I have got Nowhere due to her supposed Lack of English.

Um… That’s weird… Sorry, but how did you communicate while your relationship lasted? Did you talk at all? o_O

Thats all you need to write really....we can guess all the other stuff....

They are not all like this of course....i believe in Poland there are currently six women still available without these kind of problems... but four are gay...

..lol, they probably don't like beans either. Polish babes are nutters in general - No matter where they reside.

woah polish women are nuts

LOL
You know what, guys, my guess is that the likes of you probably attract the type of women who’d go for you only because you’re foreigners.

ah another Polish girl acting like shiit, and stopped talking.. remember man, it's just a COINCIDENCE :) :),

No, Barr, I think in your case it wasn't "a coincidence", it was just… you… lol

but you're not the only one to experience odd and not so fair behaviour from them. Two Polish girls I knew, in a row, one a girlfriend, the other a friend, both for about 8 months, both stopped talking, unable to talk to solve anything.

Yes, you’ve written about those two (my God!) girls many, many times on this forum already… How about meeting some MORE Polish girls? I mean, more than… two? I think that would broaden your horizons lol

On the other hand… You’d probably talk to these girls again and again about those previous two Polish girls and so after some time those new ones would run from you screaming ;D

So maybe spare them this suffering xD
Barr_2009 1 | 252
2 Nov 2010  #27
lol Paulina, well I can tell ya, your guess isn't quite right honest ;) It wasn't me, since I got on fine with previous women, and as we see there are a few people with similar horror stories to me here,. lol, ah and importantly, you should note, that both of the Polish women that stopped talking to me, while I was talking with them, they told me that they like to stop talking to ex boyfriends and friends at some point. The friend even bragging and laughing that she always ignored the man first.. lol, and yes I'm willing to meet more and more. and also to confirm it wasn't me, one of my current best friends is a POLISH WOMAN. yes and we get on well. So, there we go :)
Paulina 9 | 1,448
2 Nov 2010  #28
since I got in fine with previous women.

They must be brave women :) I would go crazy if someone locked me up with you in one room ;)

and as we see there are a few people with similar horror stories to me here!!

Yes, exactly - a few people :) Some men apparently come here to whine about their failed relationships and always blame the women. Most of the users here are foreign men so they will, of course, join in the whining lol

lol, and yes I'm willing to meet more and more. and also to confirm it wasn't me, one of my currenct best friends is a POLISH WOMAN. yes.

Give her some time... lol

So, there we go :) :)

Then it's a shame that you focus so much on the bad stuff and rant about those two girls on and on and on (the past) but fail to mention the "new one" (the present).

you should note, that both of the Polish women that stopped talking to me, while I was talking with them, they told me that they like to stop talking to ex boyfriends and friends at some point.

LOL
I would say, even judging by what foreign people wrote on this forum, that people in general often don't talk to their ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends and ex-friends as there is usually a reason that they're "ex".

The friend even bragging and laughing that she always ignored the man first..

And what, you think it's "a Polish thing"? LOL
Have you seen a film "Closer"?: imdb.com/title/tt0376541/
wildrover 98 | 4,452
2 Nov 2010  #29
people in general often don't talk to their ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends and ex-friends as there is usually a reason that they're "ex".

Most of my ex girlfriends...are still my friends...
Paulina 9 | 1,448
2 Nov 2010  #30
And so is my ex-boyfriend.
What I wrote about talking to ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends is based on what foreign people (and one Polish woman, I think) wrote here on this forum.


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