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Do I move from UK to Poland or not? (I met a Polish lady)


Ronnie0805 1 | 1
12 Feb 2017 #1
Hi all, I suppose this is the usual story I met a Polish lady been seeing each other for about 10 months I live in the UK and she lives in Poland I try and go over for a week every month, I'm getting to the point now everytime I fly back home it gets harder to leave her.

My question is should I move there I do like Poland very much I don't speak the language but find a lot of people speak English anyway is it really that hard to live in a different country and I know work will be a big problem for me to find, any advice would be appreciated.....
mafketis 23 | 8,438
12 Feb 2017 #2
should I move there

No.

e I do like Poland very much

Irrelevant

I don't speak the language

Deal breaker (major deal breaker).

a lot of people speak English anyway

Irrelevant.

is it really that hard to live in a different country

Yes. worth it, if you can adapt, but nothing you've written so far indicates that you can.

I know work will be a big problem for me to find

Yes.

any advice would be appreciated.....

Stay where you are or learn Polish (seriously, you need to be fluent to be happy in Poland long term).
NoToForeigners 10 | 1,062
12 Feb 2017 #3
seriously, you need to be fluent to be happy in Poland long term

That's true. Very few people on this forum are anywhere close to that.
DominicB - | 2,704
12 Feb 2017 #4
@Ronnie0805

It will end in failure unless you land a job that pays well enough for you to support yourself comfortably, and that would be hard to do without good education, skills and experience, and without knowledge of the local language.

Frankly, you should focus on learning English first.
smurf 39 | 1,981
13 Feb 2017 #5
should I move there I do like Poland

If ya really love her, yea f!ck it, you've nothing to lose except your heart

You can always do what the others lads with Polish wimmin do and teach Engerwish in crappy skools for sh!te money, but who cares, love beats all Ronnie.

F!ck the begrudgers and sure if it doesn't work out you'll have some stories to tell
RubasznyRumcajs 5 | 486
13 Feb 2017 #6
Why wont she just come to the UK to live with you then?
terri 1 | 1,665
13 Feb 2017 #7
The question you need to ask yourself is what will you do when in Poland. What chances are there of getting a good job, good accommodation, good standard of living.

It all depends on the skills you have to offer any prospective employers....or are you in the extremely fortunate position that your lady will support you both...
cms 9 | 1,271
13 Feb 2017 #8
As Smurf said - give love a chance but is there some kind of halfway house you could do - e.g. work remotely from Poland for 2 weeks a month. Or she visit you in the UK one week ? That way you can see if you are really a fit with her and if you are then you can take some long term decisions.

Before you chuck in your UK life then you must discuss the big issues with her - do you want kids ? looking after old parents, would you buy property ? If you don't feel ready to have those dicussions with her then moving is probably not wise.
OP Ronnie0805 1 | 1
13 Feb 2017 #9
Thank you all for your feedback

She has her own place and i would be living at her's and she said she earns enough to keep us both but I wouldn't be happy with that just wouldn't feel right.

I am trying to get her to come and live in England....
terri 1 | 1,665
13 Feb 2017 #10
Aha, so you'll be a kept man. There are at least a million men who would change places with you.
You sit at home, you get up when you want, do what you want, watch TV, go fishing, go shopping.....and she goes out to work, comes home and cooks dinner.

For me - the ideal life for a man.
mafketis 23 | 8,438
13 Feb 2017 #11
For me - the ideal life for a man.

No. Ideal life for a pimp. Men who aren't scum of the earth would hate such an arrangement.
smurf 39 | 1,981
14 Feb 2017 #12
Men who aren't scum of the earth would hate such an arrangement.

Bit harsh

If I knew I didn't have to work and someone would pay for everything for me I wouldn't think twice about quitting work and being a stay-at-home dad

I'd try and bring in a little money thru internet stuff but yea, give me the chance to quit a 40 hour work week and I'd be gone quicker than a hot snot
Marsupial - | 886
14 Feb 2017 #13
I agree smurf. One problem.is the dude writing this off cannot imagine anything but a life of work. Talk about giving yer life away.
mafketis 23 | 8,438
14 Feb 2017 #14
I wouldn't think twice about quitting work and being a stay-at-home dad

That's a perfectly legitimate ambition and not what terri described at all, which was lazing around home or hanging with your buds all day while she works.... and then she comes home and does the housework.

Again, any man that would seriously go for such an arrangement is scum (my opinion only, to each their own....)
Paladine 3 | 29
14 Feb 2017 #15
I moved here almost 5 years ago to be with my fiancee (we get married in a month). I do not speak Polish, I live in a city where a low percentage of people speak English (Lodz) and I have absolutely zero regrets.

Work wise - you can always teach English at somewhere like Berlitz (very easy to get a job there) for pay which is higher than the average job here in Poland (although still low compared to the UK) or if you have specialised knowledge set up your own company. Fortunately I have a very strong international professional reputation so I am not reliant on Poland for my income (all my clients are outside of Poland) - I work as a self employed consultant, so I am in a slightly better situation than many people who come here from a foreign country - but I know many expats here who are doing just fine.

Do I wish I could speak Polish? Sure. Is it a deal breaker? Absolutely not.

So if you think you will be able to find suitable work I see no reason for you not to move.

Plus it is not an all or nothing - it isn't like you can't go back to the UK if you decide you don't like it here after a period of time, or things don't work out.
mafketis 23 | 8,438
14 Feb 2017 #16
Do I wish I could speak Polish?

So what's the block? IME Polish people are far more interesting in Polish than in English.
terri 1 | 1,665
14 Feb 2017 #17
Anyone reading my post would have understood that I was being 'ironic'.

It would be interesting to take a poll of how many English men who fall in love with a Polish lady still remain with her in Poland after say about 5 years......
Atch 17 | 3,225
14 Feb 2017 #18
That's an interesting question Terri. There do seem be quite a lot of successful marriages between guys who moved to Poland before 2004 and met their wives after moving there. The problems we read about on this forum mostly seem to be among the later generation, especially those who met a Polish girl in the UK and then moved to Poland.

It's interesting that according to some stats released by the GUS 'mixed' marriages are on the rise in Poland but it's more common for Polish women to marry foreigners and when they do, it's overwhelmingly Brits they choose. Polish men on the other hand go for Ukrainian by a huge margin, followed by Russian women. Among the Polish men I know, there is a perception that Ukrainian women are better tempered and more easygoing than their Polish counterparts. Maybe that accounts for it.
mafketis 23 | 8,438
14 Feb 2017 #19
Among the Polish men I know, there is a perception that Ukrainian women are better tempered and more easygoing than their Polish counterparts

I think a simpler explanation is that more often than not women like to marry up (in terms of socio-economic status) and men like to marry down. How many fairytales end with the princess marrying a mid-level manager?

In general socio-economic temrs the US/UK outranks Poland which outranks Ukraine/Russia. There are individual exceptions but hypergamy/hypogamy explains the big trends pretty well.
NoToForeigners 10 | 1,062
14 Feb 2017 #20
Do I move from UK to Poland or not?

Please don't.
Paladine 3 | 29
14 Feb 2017 #21
@mafketis No block just entirely too busy. I don't watch Polish TV, my fiancee speaks English and I don't work in Poland so I am not exposed to the language as much as ex-pats who work here.


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