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Opinion from Polish men on this please (Polish men so 'spiritually' romantic?)


FilAm 1 | 2
21 Dec 2009 #1
Hello guys :-) I need serious answers to this, please. So we're in love, about to be engaged (As he says) after a month of knowing each other, 24/7 talking, spending time together, etc.. However, I chose not to sleep with him (He is Polish but has been in the U.S. more than 1/2 his life), not until after the marriage - This has always been by principle. He told me he's "going to wait forever" but I'm afraid, with how super nice he's been treating me, I might just give in, omg!!! It's so difficult because he is really so romantic and the kindest man I have ever met! Are most Polish men so 'spiritually' romantic? He made me fall for him ... I feel I can tell him anything under the sun and he will still have undying admiration for me just as well. He seems to really want a productive future for both of us as he shares plans and ideas a lot on how we will live our lives together. How will my Polish Misiu react or what would he think if I start to keep a distance first so I can 'hold up' until well, marriage. Likewise, he could also just be 'leading me on' to marriage to get me to bed ...

I thank you in advance for entertaining my Qs.
aphrodisiac 11 | 2,444
21 Dec 2009 #2
after a month of knowing each other

one month or many months?
OP FilAm 1 | 2
21 Dec 2009 #3
A tinie tiny month ... He said he just fell flat when he saw me ...

Aphrodisiac, well I know it could be any man but is it common or likely for Polish men to know their destinity just by 'feeling' the 'existence' of the woman of interest? He said me being 'the one' showed in my eyes ...
Cheery 10 | 126
21 Dec 2009 #4
I'm a Polish man
convex 20 | 3,978
21 Dec 2009 #5
Yes. Most Polish men, and for that matter all men in general, are 'spiritually' romantic.

Also, I have magic beans for sale if you're interested.
JustysiaS 13 | 2,240
21 Dec 2009 #6
this is all very romantic but surely you can't expect that all Polish men are like this, we know just about as much about whats going on in his head as you do. cherish what you have, don't over think stuff and stick to your guns if you wanna wait with the sexy times till after getting married ;). if he truly loves you, he'll be more than happy to wait until you're ready. so try not to give in, or maybe wait till you get engaged at least or something lol. good luck!!
Lodz_The_Boat 32 | 1,535
21 Dec 2009 #7
A tinie tiny month ... He said he just fell flat when he saw me ...

Listen my friend (from a Polish man), wait till marriage.

The moment you loose your grip, and as you say 'give in', you're back in the ORDINARY GIRL's bench for him. Count on that. Then he will just smile at himself, and laugh at you ... somewhere inside himself.

Polish men can love, but not at the extent of being 'Spiritually Romantic'. But ofcourse there ar exceptions. Your one might be the exception...but are you sure?

As for living half his life in USA.... does he have passport? =) ... oh what am I saying =D ...

Anyways... just wait till marriage. Remaining can be your mutual understanding. Be happy.
JustysiaS 13 | 2,240
21 Dec 2009 #8
As for living half his life in USA.... does he have passport? =) ... oh what am I saying =D ...

a bit of sarcasm there, i like it ;)

The moment you loose your grip, and as you say 'give in', you're back in the ORDINARY GIRL's bench for him. Count on that. Then he will just smile at himself, and laugh at you ... somewhere inside himself.

oh very very true, you have to get the timing right because the fututre of a relationship pretty much depends on it. sometimes it feels 'right' and sometimes it feels right to wait, makes it all that bit more worthwhile and special.
aphrodisiac 11 | 2,444
21 Dec 2009 #9
Here are some red flags I have noticed:

Hello guys :-) I need serious answers to this, please. So we're in love, about to be engaged (As he says) after a month of knowing each other, 24/7 talking, spending time together, etc.. However, I chose not to sleep with him (He is Polish but has been in the U.S. more than 1/2 his life), not until after the marriage - This has always been by principle. He told me he's "going to wait forever" but I'm afraid, with how super nice he's been treating me, I might just give in, omg!!! It's so difficult because he is really so romantic and the kindest man I have ever met! Are most Polish men so 'spiritually' romantic?He made me fall for him ... I feel I can tell him anything under the sun and he will still have undying admiration for me just as well. He seems to really want a productive future for both of us as he shares plans and ideas a lot on how we will live our lives together. How will my Polish Misiu react or what would he think if I start to keep a distance first so I can 'hold up' until well, marriage. Likewise, he could also just be 'leading me on' to marriage to get me to bed ...

It sounds too intense, obsessive, unreal and too perfect. Something is up.

You have only known him for ONE month and you are planing his life with him. I would SLOW down and start thinking what YOU really want.

He seems to be a good player because he sounds to perfect. There is not such a thing as a perfect person, so be careful because you are living in a fairly tale land for now.

Maybe he is working so hard on you because you are a challenge (don't want to have sex before marriage). It seems that he is succeeding in "breaking" your defenses down.

I hope I am wrong.
SzwedwPolsce 11 | 1,595
21 Dec 2009 #10
You are planning engagement after knowing each other 1 month? That is why the divorce rate is so high, people don't know each other before getting engaged/married. It takes at least 1 year before you see someones true personality. No exceptions.
Norman 2 | 11
21 Dec 2009 #11
I got engaged after knowing each other 2,5 years and still thought that was fast, 1 month has nothing to do with a solid promise nor commitment.
Lodz_The_Boat 32 | 1,535
21 Dec 2009 #12
Love can happen the first day even.

I dont like to be pessimistic. Buttttt.... if you are an American... I wish you luck!

I have a friend, my school time friend. He knows how to get his Polish clients (friends usually) into USA and get the 'citizenship' as they can it. He got some wierd tricks in his bag.

Then there are the good guyz. I would advise you to have faith... move forward. Show interest in Poland, his culture, language ... spend some more time, decide marriage .... confirm....then meet each others parents!... Come to POLAND with him :) ... meet the family! ...

God bless!
Zafrira - | 5
21 Dec 2009 #13
Take your time. One month is a very short time to make such a serious decision. However, only you can judge whether he's the one or not, we cannot advise you on your love and life.

And about your question - yes, Polish men are romantic. No, they're not romantic. Both answers are correct. In fact, Poles are just like any other men. Some believe in 'love at the first sight' and are faithful, devoted and admiring. Others are cynical, brutal egotists. You never know. There are no rules.

Anyway, I wish you luck with your boy :)
krysia 23 | 3,057
21 Dec 2009 #14
How will my Polish Misiu react or what would he think if I start to keep a distance first so I can 'hold up' until well, marriage

Who care what he thinks? It's your body and you do what's right. If he loves you, he'll wait. That's what true marriage is, the intimacy, the sharing of new experiences and going together on a new road in life. Who wants to marry used goods? If you go screw around with him, it won't be the same, but then again, everyone has their own opinion on what marriage means to them. Believe in yourself and wait till you're married, otherwise you will be disapointed and will never forgive yourself. sex isn't the greatest thing in the world but it is special and waiting for the right time with the right person mekes it even more special.
Avalon 4 | 1,068
21 Dec 2009 #15
krysia

"sex isn't the greatest thing in the world"

It had better be!!!!....it costs enough!!!!!
Lir
21 Dec 2009 #16
it costs enough!!!!!

I thought it was free most of the time? LOL.

.it costs enough!!!!!

Oh you mean the pay as you go type ? Hahaha :)
JustysiaS 13 | 2,240
21 Dec 2009 #17
Oh you mean the pay as you go type ? Hahaha :)

a contract deal is a good solution only to those who can commit to paying a monthly bill ;P
OP FilAm 1 | 2
21 Dec 2009 #18
I thank each and everyone for your opinions and advices. You may not believe it, but every input picked me up from confusion and really helped me form a general idea of what a Polish man's mentality would be pertaining to my situation. So generally, like the more 'conservative' cultures, Polish men do respect and do understand values like mine. Yes, he has an American passporte and I am American (Filipina). I was glad to finally close-in that he didn't think I was just playing coy or games, Polish men do understand then.

So to surmise, I should really hold up and not give in ... For all my life, well, I might as well - No matter what else charming courtship tricks he does. He got the ring yesterday ... He's unto to this planning for a wedding already and I said, I'd like to have a long engagement please. He agreed but stayed on until I politely insisted him to go home. Well, just this morning he said he could be 'going crazy' already. This might be a form of pressure operandi. Then again, if and only if he really cares about me (and no other different agendum), I would not want to lose all the ways coming to me, the interesting ways he shows his 'love', he says, that is how a Polish man is when in love.

Yes, he invited me to visit Poland with him, like in 1st weeks of January. I don't think Winter is the best time to visit? Maybe, for more chances to cuddle up, lol. I've never been to the eastern part of Europe. What language is similar in structure to the Polish language? It kind of sounds like German which I am familiar with. Then again, it also sounds like Russian. Could I literally translate English to Polish or is there specificity on Nouns, etc.? Is conjugation of Verbs complicated like French or Spanish?
SzwedwPolsce 11 | 1,595
22 Dec 2009 #19
It kind of sounds like German which I am familiar with. Then again, it also sounds like Russian. Could I literally translate English to Polish or is there specificity on Nouns, etc.? Is conjugation of Verbs complicated like French or Spanish?

It doesn't sound like German.

And Polish grammar is much more difficult than French or Spanish.
It's probably one of the 5 grammatically most difficult languages in the world.
southern 75 | 7,096
22 Dec 2009 #20
Russian is similar but if you know Russian words better whisper them.
aphrodisiac 11 | 2,444
22 Dec 2009 #21
just take the time to get him know first. Good luck.
ooshak - | 28
28 Dec 2009 #22
Is conjugation of Verbs complicated like French or Spanish?

at least twice as difficult.
It is not similar to German nor English. You can translate SOME things literally but not all.

A man who is in love with you after knowing you for one month doesn't love you. He can't. He doesn't know you. He loves the image of you in his head. Finding someone who can be so intensly in love with you can be overwhelming and will boost your ego so much that you will soon be addicted to this love. Don't try to adjust to his behaviour. Do your thing, take your tie, know him well before you decide anything.
Sokrates 8 | 3,346
29 Dec 2009 #23
we're in love, about to be engaged (As he says) after a month of knowing each other, 24/

Thats f*cked up.
mira - | 115
29 Dec 2009 #24
Opinion from Polish men on this please (Polish men so 'spiritually' romantic?)

No, Polish men aren't romantic, men aren't romantic in general.They make you believe that they are, but as soon as it becomes to difficult to continue pretending, they stop. As if it matters. At the end of the day, you're now their girlfriend anyway.
JustysiaS 13 | 2,240
29 Dec 2009 #25
No, Polish men aren't romantic, men aren't romantic in general.

it's funny that the kind of guys who admit to being *romantic* are usually p*ssy whipped and nauseatingly boring lol
nomaderol 5 | 726
30 Dec 2009 #26
men aren't romantic in general.They make you believe that they are, but as soon as it becomes to difficult to continue pretending, they stop. As if it matters. At the end of the day, you're now their girlfriend anyway.

pretending is on both sides. it is a process of buy and sell. it is a so cold reality that the both sides try to stay away this cold reality and they play games to reach the target. these games sometimes appear as romantism in la la lands, sometimes appear as fake wars between females and males. all are for same target and process is buy and sell.

sorry if my words are too cold.

it's funny that the kind of guys who admit to being *romantic* are usually p*ssy whipped and nauseatingly boring lol

those romantics in la la lands are so and all others are not? did you finish your drugs?
ZIMMY 6 | 1,601
30 Dec 2009 #27
So we're in love,

One month is too short a time. Wait until your first argument (which probably will be your fault). and see how that goes.

how super nice he's been treating me, I might just give in, omg!!!

That's the problem with some women; they 'feel' they're some sort of gift to men. Get over yourself.

I feel I can tell him anything under the sun and he will still have undying admiration for me just as well.

Try this; tell him you are a recovering prostitute and alcoholic and see how his "admiration" changes. My point is this; you are feeling the tingles now but wait until your relationship matures. Maybe you do have something wonderful going on but one month is just a blink of an eye.

he could also just be 'leading me on' to marriage to get me to bed ...

Again, get over yourself. If men talked like that then you'd see how ridiculous that sounds.
Now having given my harsh advice, I really do wish you the best of luck as all relationships need it. Just stop 'feeling' that you are the center of the universe. You're not and neither is he.
Amathyst 19 | 2,702
1 Jan 2010 #28
it's funny that the kind of guys who admit to being *romantic* are usually p*ssy whipped and nauseatingly boring lol

Agreed, generally quite desparate and have been watching too many chick flicks and dont really have an idea what a "real" woman wants.

those romantics in la la lands are so and all others are not? did you finish your drugs?

We could ask you the same question, by the way did you get your manky plate back? Justy has more idea of real life than you will ever know!

Again, get over yourself.

LOL...you sound like such a big girl!
BrutalButcher - | 391
1 Jan 2010 #29
what a "real" woman wants.

Money? I've got that.
Amathyst 19 | 2,702
1 Jan 2010 #30
Nope, a back bone and sustance!


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