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I met a Polish guy but wonder what his intention is..


sleeping_beauty 1 | 25
23 Jan 2010 #1
Hi everyone!
Im a newbie and want to know some opinions...........

I met a Polish guy over the net and we're talking for almost 6 months, until now. Not only over the net, also over the phone. He calls most of the time and we talked more than 2 hours in every call. He sent gifts and he's coming next month here so we could meet up and also we're going to our home to meet my family and parents. Well, the thing was, Im not sure what his real intention is. This is my 1st time to encounter a Polish guy so no idea how they think. I dont want to "pressume" that theres something more than friendship coz he never say anything about it but Im just really puzzled the way he talked and cares for me.

Thanks for the time and effort.
skysoulmate 14 | 1,297
23 Jan 2010 #2
Why two threads?

Dear Sleeping Beauty - time to wake up and realize that a Polish man is no different than an American man, or a British, German, etc. man. (I'm a guy btw)

Forget nationality, background, religion, etc. Use common sense and do what your heart tells you. It's very corney but it's also very true.

If it feels right it probaly is, and vice versa. So be a woman and let him be a man. Leave the other, unimportant garbage, such as one's nationality, age, location, citizenship, etc. at the door.

Things happen for a reason so - (this is important) - try not to be the reason for things that were meant to be not happening. (hope this makes sense to you)

Wish you both the very best.
niburak - | 36
23 Jan 2010 #3
sleeping_beauty
[quote=sleeping_beauty]no idea how they think.
Since I am Polish I belive I must know how Polish man think. You are in the best posible situation in your life. Dont forget to make ntes every day " what happen ?" It wil be very handy when after some years you decide to write a book about this. Good luck.
krysia 23 | 3,057
23 Jan 2010 #4
Dear Sleeping Beauty - time to wake up and realize that a Polish man is no different than an American man, or a British, German, etc man.

Sometimes they are.
Sometimes a polish guy who is in the US illegally will try to find an American citizen to marry to get a green card. Things like that happen all the time.

Sometimes a newly arrived Pole will develope culture shock finding difficult to adjust. But maybe he's not. Sometimes they only look for how to make money using others. Sometimes they change , sometimes they don't.

Nobody can answer your question because we don't know you or him or where you are or what are the circumstances.
Sometimes they are different, sometimes they are not.
skysoulmate 14 | 1,297
23 Jan 2010 #5
Krysia - good points... Well, your common sense will have to be the judge here!
OP sleeping_beauty 1 | 25
27 May 2011 #6
Hi guys :)

Just want to update this thread.
Everything went well for us and now, we're married!!!
tygrys 3 | 296
27 May 2011 #7
congrats. Hope all goes well
Llamatic - | 144
27 May 2011 #8
Just want to update this thread.Everything went well for us and now, we're married!!!

Holy crap! We often get such stories here but rarely get to hear what resulted.
So sometimes it does work out...
Good for you, SB. ;)
OP sleeping_beauty 1 | 25
27 May 2011 #9
thanks guys :)

"Holy crap! We often get such stories here but rarely get to hear what resulted.
So sometimes it does work out...

I also read and heard few stories just like ours.
Yeah, sometimes it does work, if you both worked on it :D
NomadatNet 1 | 457
27 May 2011 #10
So, what was his intention? (after a year, you must already have learnt that.. will you reveal? we are curious here.)
OP sleeping_beauty 1 | 25
27 May 2011 #11
So, what was his intention?

To find someone, not only to his be legally wife, but a friend, listener and an adviser as well.
cheesymac 4 | 61
27 May 2011 #12
get ready to be a mother to two son's... your husband and child
also, get ready to stay in the kitchen...
hopefully u love beer
OP sleeping_beauty 1 | 25
27 May 2011 #13
get ready to be a mother to two son's... your husband and child

Im sort of mothering my husband now and he seems a good son. Quite good guess, yeah, I want a boy.

also, get ready to stay in the kitchen...

I love kitchen, its part of my most interest and work, but wont let myself to get "stuck" in there.

hopefully u love beer

That's the first thing I noticed and learned to accept about him, and for the past year, he cut his intake to one can from five cans per day. :)
wildrover 98 | 4,451
27 May 2011 #14
That's the first thing I noticed and learned to accept about him, and for the past year, he cut his intake to one can from five cans per day. :)

Wow...seems you have got him sorted...
ShawnH 8 | 1,508
27 May 2011 #16
That's the first thing I noticed and learned to accept about him, and for the past year, he cut his intake to one can from five cans per day. :)

Hard to stay awake for the act when you are snoring on the couch... or fat and lazy for that matter.
;-)
OP sleeping_beauty 1 | 25
27 May 2011 #17
Wow...seems you have got him sorted...

yeah, i got him!
Llamatic - | 144
27 May 2011 #18
i got him!

Tell us what transpired in the past year or so. How the meeting and courtship and (seemingly) rush to marriage all came about between your thread start and now...
urszula 1 | 253
27 May 2011 #19
Looks like things are well with you. My marriage to a Polish guy lasted only 4 months because once he got his green card, he got really mean, accused me of things I never did and became emotionally and verbally abusive. For example his dick got sores on it one day and he accused me of giving him aids. I was so mad, we went to the doctor, found out he has a yeast infection because he never washed himself. I got him a job, they call me from his work, that people are complaining that he has body odor. He never used the washing machine or the drier, instead he washed his clothes by hand and hung them over the bath tub. A,merican food was a "zaraza" and he never used a microwave. His cooking was horrible and tastless and he took everything apart and never put it back together right. I can go on and on.

But that was his plan from the begining, to get to America and get his green card, nothing else mattered. I hope your Polish guy isn't retarded like this, I'm sure there are some, very few, nice Polish guys somewhere out there.

But I'm not looking anymore.
ShortHairThug - | 1,103
27 May 2011 #20
Wow, you found yourself a real prize there. You do know that it also speaks volume about you, I guess that’s what people mean when they say love is blind or was it an arrange marriage? Just think about it a sophisticated modern American woman like yourself getting herself a prince charming. LOL
OP sleeping_beauty 1 | 25
28 May 2011 #21
Tell us what transpired in the past year or so

Well, Im the kind of person who hates guessing game when it comes to this kind of matter that's why I worked on it.

All the answer I got from different forums served as my guide how to deal with this guy and to the situation. Well, I met lots of different people from different races, from different places, so I dont pressumed that he will be the guy will "perfectly" meet my expectations.

How the meeting and courtship

We finally meet up. Its Friday night and the next day, we flew to my home country to spend weekends there and meet my family (although a bit nervous for bringing a stranger). Well, my family already get use to that I have foreign friends, so they got along nicely. Me, observing how everything will go and waiting for him to talk, but nothing :?

So, Saturday afternoon, around 5PM, spending time in a resort and the next day we will fly back and I will go back to work, but still, I havent know the real score between us. Then we went for a swim, thats where he start to move. Yeah, he made his MOVE, attempting to kiss me!!! I dont intend to ruined that moment but, it just exploded and pushed him and I said....

"You're not my guy and Im not your girl and you never say anything about it and then you want to kiss me! You better use that lips first to say what's the real score between us and I want to know it NOW!!!"

And then, he came forward gently and and reached for me and said ....

"WE ARE, we just dont know yet until now. We're talking and exchanged opinions in different things around us for the past 6 months, and from there I realized how good you are. Although you havent met me, but still you are always there to listen in times I really need one. I met different woman and you are absolutely different, you are not selfish. I asked you so may times if you want all the materials that a girl will ask for, but you never ask for anything. You are so humble. Although you are such an workaholic, you always find a time for your friends.

Im sure you have some doubts about me and Im not expecting that you will accept at this moment, but I made up my mind, I dont want just to be your friend, I want to be your guy and I love you more than you know (HE'S STARTED CRY!!!). If you will say NO, I will accept it but, I will not stop until you say YES."(He let go of me and looked down to hide his red eyes and face)

And then, I hold his face and brought it up and of course, what are you expecting me to say!!! "YES!"
He's very happy and lifted me coz of it. Oh, yeah, we finally kissed.

Went back to our house for dinner and we talked to my Mom about it and she's happy for us.

After a year, he proposed and we flew to my home country Mom to ask formally for my hand and shared the good news.

rush to marriage

Actually, yes, it was very rush. We just decided to do it early this year and we only had 4 months to prepare. Im about to finished my work in the country where Im working so we decided to do it before that day, coz its more easy for us to do it here compare to our both home country( papers etc). Everything went well.
Maaarysia
28 May 2011 #22
He never used the washing machine or the drier, instead he washed his clothes by hand and hung them over the bath tub.

Wow, it must been in 80s.

Urszula by reading your comments I feel that he broke your heart so much that now all the negative feeling towards him you screen on Poles in general.
Llamatic - | 144
28 May 2011 #23
"You're not my guy and Im not your girl and you never say anything about it and then you want to kiss me!"

Excellent! Good for you! More girls should stand up for themselves and make such demands from men.

Im sure you have some doubts about me and Im not expecting that you will accept at this moment, but I made up my mind, I dont want just to be your friend, I want to be your guy.

So sweet. Sounds like you landed a good one!

What a lovely story, SB. Thanks for sharing it. Good luck into the future.
:)

You better use that lips first to say what's the real score

Lol. I love this. :)
urszula 1 | 253
29 May 2011 #24
Urszula by reading your comments I feel that he broke your heart so much that now all the negative feeling towards him you screen on Poles in general

Yup.
pawian 173 | 13,452
29 May 2011 #25
This is my 1st time to encounter a Polish guy so no idea how they think.

It will probably be like a Close Encounter of the Third Kind.

d
isthatu2 4 | 2,704
29 May 2011 #26
I was so mad, we went to the doctor, found out he has a yeast infection because he never washed himself

Thank you,that was priceless :) :),to coin a vernacular I think you colonials use, what a FCUKTARD!!! :):)
You are well shot of that loser love,dont worry though,a bum like that will be a few months short of a felony and deportation back to country of birth :)
Filios1 8 | 1,336
29 May 2011 #27
urszulaThreads: 1
Posts: 257
Joined: Aug 31, 07

Most likely you are bitter because the guy found a better looking wife once he got to the States. No sense in it though, men are simply looking for something different than women. Exaggerated stories about how badly he looked after his own personal hygiene do not fool this particular poster.

To put in other words, I bet he is smelling a hell of a lot better with his new girl :)
urszula 1 | 253
29 May 2011 #28
Most likely you are bitter because the guy found a better looking wife once he got to the States

Lol. I'm not bitter, just stating the facts. And no, he was an ugly fucster, lot older than me, and no I am not not an ugly fat American. But I better go to McDonald's or I'll get blown away in a tornado.
Filios1 8 | 1,336
29 May 2011 #29
McDonald's or I'll get blown away in a tornado

ha ha... Never thought I'd see the day where a Big Mac is seen as a life saving device :)
Koala 1 | 332
29 May 2011 #30
Looks like things are well with you.

You're an idiot for marrying a guy you didn't even learn enough about. Don't blame all Poles for that.


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