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International/binational couples and communication problems


Ethanolbrah 3 | 9
1 Apr 2014 #1
Hello everyone,

I've been lurking the "relationships & marriage" subforum for a while now and after reading quite a few of the posts in there, I had to ask myself how the devil do these binational couples communicate without 60% of what they say not getting lost in translation? I for one can't fathom being in a relationship with someone whose ability to express herself in our common language (English, in this case) isn't up to par. Whenever I read about an immigrant from a 3rd world country dating and possibly considering marriage with an European woman (this is the most common constellation) I wonder what their conversations sound like. They're hardly discussing complex topics, or expressing complex thoughts, emotions and whatnot.

What do you think about this? Have you been in a relationship with someone who wasn't fluent in English? Do you know couples who struggle with linguistic difficulties?
Anna123 - | 4
15 Aug 2014 #2
Merged: Language barrier? Would a Polish man marry an English/Irish girl he's seeing?

Just wondering whether my Polish boyfriend would marry me eventually. I don't really speak the language, though I am learning it and wonder whether he would prefer a Polish girl really who speaks the same mother tongue. We have a lot in common but I wonder whether he misses speaking his own language.
szczecinianin 4 | 345
15 Aug 2014 #3
What a strange question. Without knowing your boyfriend and his feelings towards you any answer to your question would be pure guesswork.
noreenb 7 | 557
15 Aug 2014 #4
Hmm, I don't think that the language may become an obstacle.
However, one my friends didn't feel too comfortable not being able to say exactly what she'd meant, being in a relationship with a foreign man, who spoke different language.

True love has it's own way of expressions, not necessarily connected with the language.
Maluch 30 | 95
15 Aug 2014 #5
Insecurity is usually a turn off. Be confident in your relationship and don't ask internet peeps advice ;)
Anna123 - | 4
16 Aug 2014 #6
What a strange question. Without knowing your boyfriend and his feelings towards you any answer to your question would be pure guesswork.

Yeah I should have said something about that, I know that he loves me.

True love has it's own way of expressions, not necessarily connected with the language.

That's really true, thank you for your reply.

Insecurity is usually a turn off. Be confident in your relationship and don't ask internet peeps advice

I was just wondering if there are any Polish guys on here that could tell me how they feel about their girlfriends not being fluent in Polish and if they take their relationships with English women seriously or not. I can ask internet peeps for advice if I want to :p
Wulkan - | 3,250
16 Aug 2014 #7
I was just wondering if there are any Polish guys on here that could tell me how they feel about their girlfriends not being fluent in Polish and if they take their relationships with English women seriously or not.

Sure there are and I happen to be one. We have been together for over 6 years, we have one boy and another one on it's way. She can say a few words in Polish. Since my English has been quite fluent from the beginning of our relationship sometimes I think she forgets that I'm Polish. We have never had any problems due to the cultural differences as we are both Europeans so they are minor. If you have any more questions just PM me.
Roger5 1 | 1,458
16 Aug 2014 #8
We have never had any problems due to the cultural differences as we are both Europeans so they are minor.

Agree. With us the nationalities are reversed, but Polish culture has a lot in common with British culture. The only thing I struggled to get used to is the appearance of abruptness in casual speech, which can seem rude at times but is not intended to be. Anyway, husbands and wives tend to train each other, so harmony should prevail.
Anna123 - | 4
16 Aug 2014 #9
Sure there are and I happen to be one. We have been together for over 6 years, we have one boy and another one on it's way.

Thank you for your reply, very much appreciated. I'm glad you guys are happy together. I was just wondering because where I live in England, there are a lot of Polish women with English guys but I've never seen it the other way around so was starting to assume Polish men just prefer Polish women. It's different where you live ?

She can say a few words in Polish. Since my English has been quite fluent from the beginning of our relationship sometimes I think she forgets that I'm Polish.

That's great. He's fluent too so we have no problem communicating. It's just I wonder does he miss Polish.

Polish culture has a lot in common with British culture.

Yes, I agree, there are no problems regarding culture.

Anyway, husbands and wives tend to train each other, so harmony should prevail.

That's true. I hope it will :)
Wulkan - | 3,250
17 Aug 2014 #10
was starting to assume Polish men just prefer Polish women.

Usually it is that way but as you can see, not always.

That's great. He's fluent too so we have no problem communicating. It's just I wonder does he miss Polish.

I don't miss Polish for sure, the world of foreign language was always fascinating me. I have never had such a thing like homesickness, I guess I'm a natural born expat :-)
peter_olsztyn 6 | 1,098
18 Aug 2014 #11
Just wondering whether my English girlfriend would marry me eventually. I don't really speak the language, though I am learning it and wonder whether she would prefer an English boy really who speaks the same mother tongue. We have a lot in common but I wonder whether she misses speaking her own language :)
Anglo
18 Aug 2014 #12
Does your girlfriend live in Poland with you where she surrounded by Polish speakers ?.


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