The BEST Guide to POLAND
Unanswered  |  Archives 
 
 
User: Guest

Home / Love  % width posts: 240

Polish Girl Doesn't Want To Touch.


plk123 8 | 4,149
26 Sep 2010 #91
approximately the last four months. We've spent a lot of time together during these past months. We talked for hours, I've drew portraits of her, went to movies, out to eat, and she's now even living in an extra room in my apartment. I've directly and indirectly expressed that I love her

you love her after 4 months? really? hmmm scary

I feel a strong need to move forward.

hold your horses, kid

I hate having to do this, because I hate secrets, I feel as if I'm betraying the confidence of a private situation, but she won't talk, and I need to know what is going on, because I can't figure it out on my own, so help me someone.

seems you may be sincere here then.. take what you are getting (the knee, lol, sry dude but that's just funny) and enjoy it.. i'm guessing both of you are way young.. just be patient.. polkas are that way, for the most part.. if you are cool then eventually she'll open up but you can't rush it or you'll push her away..

there is also a chance she's not that much into you.. so be prepared for that..

good luck otherwise.

pay and stay friends with her.

gold digger

Id just go with the direct approach, kinda " girl you best start spending some time on your back cos this just aint working out for me".

maybe that 50euro is the way to break the ice.. lol

So, lonliness motivating her to use me as a prop just doesn't sound right.

actually it does

I'm bending over backwards really far, and she knows it. How can I know for sure if she only wants to be friends?

consider the advice the gold digger gave you.. it's very possible she only wants to be friends and/or is using you as a meal ticket

I'm strong enough to end it, if and only if that must be done.

that's probably so..

How can I be sure you are right she doesn't really care for me that way? Can you make me understand it.

she doesn't let you touch her.. get it?

They didn't give me touches, they wanted to touch and be touched.

see, you know better.

On the other hand, a prostitute and good moral woman demand some form of payment, either cash on hand or a promise of stability before sex occurs.

haha, great observation my man.

There are a lot of intelligent, very gorgeous American artist women who are monogamous and who'd have sex like in the first week of dating. It's four months and I can't even hold her hand, come on.

yup, you do know.. go with your inner feeling.. it's never ever wrong

I may tell her about this anyway so she can read all your gossip, at least she'll know everything was from a truthful insider, yours truly.

no, do not do that.. it's highly likely she'll be pissed..

She is encouraging gossip and potential misunderstanding.

yup.. and i think you already know that you probably should just move on.. life's too short to play games.. find another and be happy.

just wait for her to touch you first ...lol

lol.. no, it'll never happen, i feel

And she doesn't respond when you ask her about it because her only possible response would mean an end to her free ride.

ok,this is one of the v. few things i will agree with tz on.

I'm curious about this too. Seem like you have problems understanding girls.

why is that? not all women play games and i agree with him, just the stupid ones do.. the ones worth anything don't are up front from the get-go..

She is a friend, not that great of a friend if she is being insensitive and just using me.

exactly

If she doesn't answer you then you have your answer.

he already has the answer but doesn't seem to believe it.

Those who don't like massages are 'touched' in the head.

lol.. this thread is beginning to be "rich"

To be honest, I think you are wasting minutes with her. Kick her sorry butt outta there.

agreed

There's always the 'rape option'.

and then you wonder why people here hate your stupid arse.. seriously man, that was inappropriate as it gets.

True words. But there is a difference. You are in a committed, caring relationship between two adults, poor Popcorn is in a relationship with a leech.

and she has had plenty of space and seems to want more.. move one popcorn.

but she tells me that maybe some unattractive person we are acquainted with may want one.

dude, she's not into you.. you're wasting your efforts here

I played a similar game, and we laughed. But, still, no confirmation.

that is a confirmation..

I don't think it's forcing anything except her hand. There's nothing wrong with asking someone if they have feelings for you. And I assume that if she doesn't that you'd then want to alter yours and hers situation. Because at this point it seems one sided. From over here anyway...

yup, stand up for yourself

I have asked. She becomes expressionless, almost slightly irritable. Even if calm, and sweet in the asking, she avoids eye contact and says nothing. She will even walk away without saying goodbye. She has done it several times.

again, this is a lost cause.. move along and dump this leech

Maybe even try some alcohol to loosen her up.

no, that's dishonest, really

But first, I will teaze.

he said tease out.. that doesn't mean to tease.. that means work out gently..

Remember, some women like a challenge. If they can't get what they want, they try much harder to get it in other creative ways. If you hold back, or come off like you don't really care, that may motivate her to pursue you.

this is playing a game.. kind of waste of time as from what i read, she just isn't all that into him

I prefer to build things on truth.

and stick with that.. but you have to be selective with information.. not everything is meant to be shared.. just remember that

Well, you must beat your horse and get it under control :)

lmao

but she has led me to believe some are not true and the others she just freezes and abruptly ends the conversation.

the answer is in those she freezes on.. and that answer is the negative

Let us know when you have gotten to her bottom.

:D

You overanalyze you get nowhere.Mental masturbation from overanalyzing.Offer your room to another girl.

that's the bottom line..nicely said

There are still women out there that do not want to give 'it' up until they are married. Until then she might not want any sign of impropriety, or be accused of being a tease.

but why not just say that from the start.. keeping the guy in the dark isn't ok.

She really wanted to know, so I told her the polishforums.com.

big mistake man.. mark my words

Run girl, run!!!
Szukaj innego mieszkania!

jeez.. after all the other advice you give him now you say that.. WTF?

Dude, don't get you're hopes too high.

This is just crazy! Do you really want her seeing all this? :D

yup and exactly... it's a bad move, imho

Of course she would want to know, but man that was one dumb thing to do.

probably shot his chances not that he had any anyway.. she'll give him an answer in 2 days? wtf? that doesn't sound right either..
Wroclaw 44 | 5,384
26 Sep 2010 #92
she'll give him an answer in 2 days?

when she has found another place to stay.
poland_
26 Sep 2010 #93
How old are you Popcorn and are you based in the UK or USA.

Popcorn, you did not answer the question so I will ask again. How old are you?
The first thing that came to my mind when I read your initial post, is age difference, I would guess you are 40+ and she in her early 20's.
southern 75 | 7,096
26 Sep 2010 #94
Only one way works in these cases.You bring another Polka in the room and you start undressing and caressing her in front of the other.The other gets hot and you have two Polki in the sack.
wildrover 98 | 4,451
26 Sep 2010 #95
Great things happen.... on fantasy island...
southern 75 | 7,096
26 Sep 2010 #96
It is true.Many polish girls have bi tendencies or want to experiment.

The world doesn't revolve around you and your sexual fantasies. Please keep to the original topic.
Paulina 10 | 1,781
26 Sep 2010 #97
Well, I find it deceptive to not tell a guy there is no romantic attraction.

Well, she gave you most of the nonverbal signals one can think of... And she didn't claim that she had any romantic feelings for you? But I agree that when asked directly she should give a direct answer.

when she has found another place to stay.

It's possible ;)

Popcorn, you did not answer the question so I will ask again. How old are you?
The first thing that came to my mind when I read your initial post, is age difference, I would guess you are 40+ and she in her early 20's.

I was wondering about that too...
swiss_vd - | 1
26 Sep 2010 #98
guess you should know better then anyone else (except her) if she's into you or not.

but if the situation is really like you described it, sorry, guess you have no chance.
it's true that women can change their mind so quickly, but acting like the way you did, the best you can expect from her now, is friendship.

but do you really want this ?
be careful, because there is a risk that you're gonna end up really hurt. friendships between different sexes hardly works for long, and especially when you start this with an interest on her already, it's a real bombshell.

good luck mate
Barr_2009 1 | 252
26 Sep 2010 #99
My opinion is, get away from her, cut her off right now. She seems not interested, cut her off as she will do it to you. If she did want you, she will make a move. DON'T pay for her drinks or do ANYTHING for her, it's just not worth it and not advantageous to you. She will use you and run, I've seen it myself, first Polish girl I met was interested and was with her for some time, but second one showed minimal interest at first but changed. Don't profess love or anything, keep her guessing. If she shows you little or it goes to nothing, keep distance totally, or get away. Let her come to you with some signals. I try to learn this lesson. Take it from a guy with experience of that.
Wroclaw Boy
26 Sep 2010 #100
DON'T pay for her drinks or do ANYTHING for her

Thats a good idea, take her to a restaurant and at the end demand that she should pay, observe her response.
shewolf 5 | 1,077
26 Sep 2010 #101
Popcorn, did you have a deal with her that she could move in with you on the condition that it would become romantic? If not, then I think you deceived her. You made her think that she could move in with you as a friend and then you started touching her, pushing yourself on her. And now you want to throw her out because she's not giving in. How is she taking advantage of you? I think it's the other way around. Ask her to start paying rent if you've changed your mind and feel entitled to money but stop groping her.
f stop 25 | 2,513
26 Sep 2010 #102
I would love to hear her side of the story.
When I was in college and struggling, I rented a room in this guy's big house, in exchange for keeping the whole place clean. He turned out to be a pig in more than one sense. He said it was my fault he could not stop thinking about sex, looking the way I did. I was trying to be polite and considerate of his feelings, thought we could be friends, but he "had his needs", he said. I scraped his whole pig-sty of the house clean while he oogled me, before I realized that I had look for a new place to live, all within one week.
uknohoo
26 Sep 2010 #103
Lol. funny stuff, can one be any more clueless? this guy is totally getting used and he thinks he "loves" her? dude, get a life and good luck man.
Broken 1 | 6
26 Sep 2010 #104
Trust me on this one, kick her out right now this very second. Block her email her phone everything run from this woman like your life depends on it.

Go find a woman that is interested in you, these issues make you sound pathetic and no woman could find this attractive.

I apologise if this sounds hard but trust me, I know about similar things.
Paulina 10 | 1,781
26 Sep 2010 #105
I must admit I agree with shewolf... If you didn't say that a romantic relationship was a condition of her living in your spare room she could think that it was a friend's favour. If you feel used then tell her to give you some money to pay for the rent or at least for the food. If she can't cook then tell her to do the dishwashing. Although this whole thing probably won't work as you clearly want a relationship, not friendship.

I would love to hear her side of the story.

Me too, it's always good to hear it to get the full picture.

When I was in college and struggling, I rented a room in this guy's big house, in exchange for keeping the whole place clean.

Eewww, that's grose ;O
Barr_2009 1 | 252
26 Sep 2010 #106
Well pay halves at least. I agree there, seems like being used so ask her for rent, or tell her she needs to go very soon
shewolf 5 | 1,077
26 Sep 2010 #107
Popcorn, I think she made her feelings very clear with her body language but you can't take a hint. You've chosen to force yourself on her, which is wrong. You could end up in jail eventually, because of her or someone else, if that's how you behave.

Even your title "Polish Girl Doesn't Want to Touch" is clear and then you go on and on about still trying to touch her. Isn't that some kind of crime even? It gives me the creeps.
trener zolwia 1 | 939
26 Sep 2010 #108
I think it's your decision, to live with sexually inadequate partner and frustrate your needs. Why did you do that is for more serious conversation and different circumstances.

Interesting angle I did not think of (leave it to you, N. :) ) Indeed it would be interesting to hear more about his past romantic life to see if he has a history of seeking girls who are physically and emotionally unavailable to him. But, as you say, this is probably a bit deeper than the expressed problem at hand.

It is interesting getting this take from the girls here. This is something not many men have had to deal with. But she is still taking advantage of him and the situation and it is up to her how much of this she wants to put up with for her free ride.

she gave you most of the nonverbal signals one can think of...

I think she made her feelings very clear with her body language but you can't take a hint. You've chosen to force yourself on her, which is wrong.

Yep. Yep.

Popcorn, you did not answer the question so I will ask again. How old are you?
The first thing that came to my mind when I read your initial post, is age difference, I would guess you are 40+ and she in her early 20's.

I wonder about their ages too. But I don't think he is that old. OP seems younger. Maybe they're both about 20.

I still can't believe that he showed her this thread. Lol. After reading OP's whining here she'd either run to his arms or run away from him once and for all.
uknohoo
26 Sep 2010 #109
Run, run like the wind.
Paulina 10 | 1,781
26 Sep 2010 #110
It is interesting getting this take from the girls here.

Well, it looks like his attitude is like this: "I give you my spare room, I give you food, you give me sex." LOL

I know I'm simplifying but it's pretty obvious that she's not attracted to him and has no romantic feelings for him. So what did he expect? He wrote that she knew about his feelings from the start. So how was she behaving back then, before moving in? Did he even ask about her feelings before she moved in? Did he ask her to move in or did she ask him?

We only know his side of the story so I guess we girls try to think about what's her side of the story too ;)

This is something not many men have had to deal with.

Yeah, it's a weird situation...

But she is still taking advantage of him and the situation and it is up to her how much of this she wants to put up with for her free ride.

I guess we'll find out in two days, if Popcorn is willing to share her decision with us ;)

I still can't believe that he showed her this thread. Lol.

As far as I understand he didn't, he showed her this forum, but didn't confirm that this is the thread he had in mind.
Broken 1 | 6
27 Sep 2010 #111
As far as I understand he didn't, he showed her this forum, but didn't confirm that this is the thread he had in mind.

I think she may well read this one.
Amathyst 19 | 2,702
27 Sep 2010 #112
"I give you my spare room, I give you food, you give me sex."

I dont see it that way, I see it as "I know this poor sap fancies me so I'll string him along and get a good free ride whilst it lasts"
Paulina 10 | 1,781
27 Sep 2010 #113
I think she may well read this one.

Well, it doesn't look like this to me:

She really wanted to know, so I told her the polishforums.com. I said, you could probably figure out where to go on the site. And she did. She types in the browser bar and the page loads. She begins scrolling down, then points at this thread right away and says is this it? I say, oh, is that something I might say? I smile. So she goes to another thread "How to find an English speaking boyfriend in Poland" and asks "is this it?" Great, now she thinks I'm gay. But, I guess that would be off topic. I probably should start another thread.

I see it as "I know this poor sap fancies me so I'll string him along and get a good free ride whilst it lasts"

Sure, it's possible.
But it also seems he isn't that much interested in her feelings towards him. It looks like he's only interested in touching and this is the only problem he sees - that there's no touching ;)

Don't you find it weird that he didn't ask about her feelings before she moved in? That they didn't kiss even once? She lives in a spare room - it's not like she's sleeping with him in one bed.

So why did he think there's going to be a romantic relationship? It's just weird, I'm confused by this story...
Guest
27 Sep 2010 #114
Paulina, u seem 2 be fixated on the sex thing, he mentiones wanting to know her feelings more times in his first couple posts (those long 1s) then he talked about touching or sex. ot tirned more into that once all the responces started to flow in.

Either way, this seems rather complicated like most things involving chicas tends to b.
Move along if u want 2 retain your sanity Mr. Popcorn.
trener zolwia 1 | 939
27 Sep 2010 #115
It's just weird, I'm confused by this story...

Yeah but he's a young boy all gaga over this girl, he's not thinking clearly. Typical. :s And to this point he hasn't done anything too awful creepy ...that we know of.

I see it as "I know this poor sap fancies me so I'll string him along and get a good free ride whilst it lasts"

This is how I still see it.

We only know his side of the story so I guess we girls try to think about what's her side of the story too

Maybe she'll stop by and talk to us! :D

Move along if u want 2 retain your sanity Mr. Popcorn.

Good advice!
Patrycja19 63 | 2,699
27 Sep 2010 #116
I'm sure he does not realize this, but his reaction to the story further exposes his pathology. It's fascinating how all the pieces fit together.

agree :)

I think this girl is feeling like she was put in a situation she doesnt want to be in.

I mean ,they are friends, but hes letting her stay in the other * ROOM* she is thinking
ok, I can do this, he seems like hes going to be a gentleman, but of course, putting
your hand on someones knee is a direct advance, and I am sure she felt like he is
trying to take advantage of her.. when your not attracted to someone, you dont give them
the ok to touch you, so she is saying, hey get your dirty paws off me. or else.

but she is laughing cause she feels awkward so she is putting up with it till there is a way
out, you wait and see.. if you want to keep her as a friend popcorn, I would back off
and leave well enough alone. cause it sounds like a one sided relationship all in your
mind.

and your pushing her away in your own home. if your friends, then stay that, relationships
grow over time. its only been 4 months people dont marry in 4 months or become exclusive
( unless that is what they are looking for) right away..

she is there because you are friends and that is what you told her.. right? its ok to stay
in your spare room? I think theres more to this story and you are pushing it.

because every time someone tried to help you, you found a excuse and a reason
why it cant be done. I am only being honest, and you need that.. come back down
to reality.. take the gentleman approach with the open the car door, dont expect and
leave her some space. keep your hands in your pockets.
Wroclaw Boy
27 Sep 2010 #117
Popcorn hasnt been on for a while, perhaps all this worked and hes getting some well overdue sack time.
poland_
27 Sep 2010 #118
I wonder about their ages too. But I don't think he is that old. OP seems younger. Maybe they're both about 20.

Here is his quote: "We talked for hours, I've drew portraits of her, went to movies, out to eat, and she's now even living in an extra room in my apartment "

I just see some artist 40+ type, so based on his info, he set up the rules and he should know these conditions are set in stone doe a Polish woman, if he is trying to change the goal posts,it requires a fresh set of rules.
southern 75 | 7,096
27 Sep 2010 #119
With Polki first you bang them then you pay them.It is not the other way around.
richasis 1 | 420
27 Sep 2010 #120
If all else fails, wear nothing but body paint with your best blackface and see what gives.

Home / Love / Polish Girl Doesn't Want To Touch.
Discussion is closed.