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Polonius3 994 | 12,380
30 Aug 2008 #1
When someone would come up to the late US Sen. Edmund Muskie (Marciszewski) and say: "Hey senator, have you heard the latest Polish joke?" He sould shoot back: "See that brown spot on the tip of my shoe? That's from kicking the arseholes of idiots who tell me Polish jokes!"

Another retort: Why are Polish jokes so short? So the idiots that tell them can remember them.

You can also reply with a quip against the joke-teller's nationality: What do you get when you cross a......... (Swede, Russian, Englishman, German, Italian, Jew, Negro, Hungarian, Frenchmen, etc.) wtih an ape? -- A retarded ape!

And finally: How many Poles does it take to change the world: THREE -- an electrician from Gdańsk, a cardinal from Kraków and a political scientist from the US (Brzeziński).
BubbaWoo 33 | 3,506
30 Aug 2008 #2
You can also reply with a quip against the joke-teller's nationality


thats polish logic for you!
Switezianka - | 463
3 Sep 2008 #3
Why combat "Polack" jokes? These are just jokes.
z_darius 14 | 3,965
3 Sep 2008 #4
thats polish logic for you!

as if polish jokes were a sign of logic :)
3 Sep 2008 #5
Why are Polish jokes so short? So the idiots that tell them can remember them.

i agree with switezianka... guys here try to dig deeper into nothing, and women just wanna get a laugh...?
beenerschnitzel - | 11
4 Oct 2008 #6
You forgot Curie

Why combat "Polack" jokes? These are just jokes.[/quote]

No they are not. Some people in the US actually believe the negative stereotypes. My gran and mom got crap for being polish. My grandfather did not go to my parents' wedding because she was a pollack and catholic. OK???? I am the 1st generation who has not gotten outright crap for being polish. However, I did meet an educated female , mind you drunk , who told me i could not be polish because they are scum of the earth. Everyone sat there in horror not quite knowing what to say. My friend kept mouthing be the bigger person... she was too drunk to fight anyway.....

And of course you get the polish jokes but you don't see signs like my grandma did no polish allowed or hired - that's how it was in the old days over here.

Now I have found my relatives in Poland- they are all professionals and highly educated. Poland has a higher literacy rate than the USA. Sticks and stones.....
matryoshka 5 | 21
4 Oct 2008 #7
I LOVE that last retort (initial post)... Genius! (Yes, Polish wit IS genius!! And ingenius!)
LondonChick 31 | 1,133
5 Oct 2008 #8
Why combat "Polack" jokes? These are just jokes.

Exactly... and anyone who tells these kind of jokes just show themselves up to be a knob. There's no need to combat them or prepare any (not particularly in the cases above) come-backs.
Siegfried 1 | 100
6 Oct 2008 #9
I dont mind polack jokes - they are all the same everywhere in the world, just nations change
loco polaco 3 | 352
6 Oct 2008 #10
And finally: How many Poles does it take to change the world: THREE -- an electrician from Gdańsk, a cardinal from Kraków and a political scientist from the US (Brzeziński).

and then you wonder why? this thread is a rolling pollack joke. :D

and here is one for you all:

How do you sink a Polish battleship?
Put it in water.
Somerled 5 | 93
6 Oct 2008 #11
Or one could just grow a pair and not get bent out of shape over a joke.
matryoshka 5 | 21
9 Oct 2008 #12
Yes, but playfully responding to the joke is part of the fun!
jnowiski 2 | 121
9 Oct 2008 #13
I'll curse at them in russian, then they get confused whether the last name is Polish or Russian. mwahaha!!!!!!!

...but no one ever says Polish jokes to me.
plk123 8 | 4,142
9 Oct 2008 #14
Polish Jokes have been around for a very long time. Some people find them offensive, some find them funny, some don't. The thing is, most of these jokes can be applied to practically any race, color, creed, or individual.

EraAtlantia 2 | 106
9 Oct 2008 #15
best thing to do is call them a ******* ugly ***** and claim you'll cut thier head off and play with thier blood....
LAGirl 9 | 496
9 Oct 2008 #16
I hate Polish jokes
sledz 23 | 2,250
9 Oct 2008 #17
Whats green and flys over Poland???
Peter Panski
polishcanuck 7 | 462
10 Oct 2008 #18
I've never been a victim of Polish jokes. I think it's mostly the polish "wiesniaks" that have these problems.
plk123 8 | 4,142
10 Oct 2008 #19
Peter Panski

lol. in chi-polish this can be bad. :D
LAGirl 9 | 496
11 Oct 2008 #20
Funny one joking.
joepilsudski 26 | 1,389
13 Oct 2008 #21

The bombs knocked out the one lightbulb,,,

This caused problems for the Polish soldiers when they had pee...

But it was OK...They used their flashlights, and they found the kitchen sink.
Seanus 15 | 19,674
13 Oct 2008 #22
I've told this one b4. A German, a Frenchman, a Dutchman and a Pole were caught as POW's in Iraq. Facing a firing squad, they were told that all they had to do was to say an element and they'd be set free.

The German stepped up, 'water'. He was set on his way

The Frenchman stepped up, 'air'. He also walked

The Dutchman strolled forward, 'earth'. He marched away

The Pole took position, 'Oh kurwa, fire'...
LAGirl 9 | 496
16 Oct 2008 #23
I hate it when people make jokes on the Polish people why are they so picked on I dont understand I see nothing dumb about them at all I do hope people see them as smart people.
joepilsudski 26 | 1,389
16 Oct 2008 #24
Who is picking on you LAGirl?...Tell me, and I will retaliate.
LAGirl 9 | 496
17 Oct 2008 #25
No one I am American but people should bash eachother we are all humans.
joepilsudski 26 | 1,389
20 Oct 2008 #26
I am advocating a PADL or Polish Anti-Defamation League...I am also advocating the building of a powerful Polish lobby in the US so that Poland may get billiomns each year to further her development, and to aid in her defense, because Poland is a persecuted nation 'surrounded by enemies who want to see her people driven into the Baltic'!...Any 'anti-Polonia' jokes, stories or criticisms of Poles by non-Poles will be considered 'hate speech', and subject to criminal prosecution.
gtd 3 | 639
20 Oct 2008 #27

loco polaco 3 | 352
3 Dec 2008 #28
Everyone is in a hurry to scream 'racism' these days!

A man at the store asks the clerk:

'In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?'

The clerk looks at him and says, 'Are you Polish?'

The guy (clearly offended) says, 'Well, yes I am.

But let me ask you something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage,
would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst,
would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog.
would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco,
would you ask if I was Mexican?'

'If I asked for some Irish whiskey,
would you ask if I was Irish?'

The clerk says, 'Well, no, I probably wouldn't!'

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says,
'Well then, why did you ask me if I'm Polish
because I asked for Polish sausage?'

The clerk replied, 'Because you're in Home Depot.'
time means 5 | 1,309
3 Dec 2008 #29
The clerk replied, 'Because you're in Home Depot.'

lmao :-))))
Easy_Terran 3 | 312
3 Dec 2008 #30
I was laughing my a$$ off, too, got tears in my eyes :))