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Advice to schools hiring native speakers


dudelz  2 | 7  
6 Nov 2011 /  #1
So, you’ve hired a native speaker. The first thing you should do is offer them a drink as they will probably be thirsty after the journey. Usually tea will suffice but the more experienced teacher may expect something stronger. DO NOT give them alcohol as this will only encourage them to drink excessively and wave their arms about in class. Rest assured that the money you pay them will be spent on alcoholic beverages, but you hired them to teach; not to drink.

Not all native speakers behave in the same way, despite the fact that they all speak roughly the same language. A Canadian will be more accustomed to extremes of temperature than, say, a British NS, and if you have hired the latter make sure you always mention the weather by way of small-talk; it will be greatly appreciated and NS will be more than happy to inform you that, contrary to popular opinion, it doesn’t always rain in Britain.

Some native speakers take advantage of the fact that English enjoys lingua franca status in many parts of the world, which is, of course, the reason why they have a job in your country, so don’t be surprised if they don’t even bother to learn your language although most will make some attempt to learn the basics, mainly through politeness, or curiosity, or because they want to impress a member of the opposite sex. BEWARE: natives have been known to seduce students, secretaries, sometimes even directors, their foreign allure proving irresistible to some; but despite their indefinite articles and auxiliary verbs, native speakers don’t always make ideal partners and cannot guarantee lifelong happiness.

Most native speakers only stay in their host countries for a year, possibly two, and then move on. Others stay longer, either because they are in relationships or they have lost their passport, or they hold the mistaken belief that they actually have a career. NS will probably demand more money as a result, in which case you should safely return them to the nearest airport and give them a firm handshake. Reassure your native speakers whenever possible that they have a good life and are paid well above the national average; in most cases it is true but if they expect to be treated like rock stars then you should safely return them to the nearest airport and give them a firm handshake.

Lastly, it is important that NS be kept in a warm and safe environment when not working. Renting a small flat for them is a good idea and NS will expect it to have all modern conveniences such as toilet, fridge, and microwave oven. Flat screen TV’s and aquariums constitute luxury items and if NS demands such then please return them to the nearest airport.
ukpolska  
6 Nov 2011 /  #2
Mildly amusing, and do you base this on personal experience? ;0)

Others stay longer, either because they are in relationships or they have lost their passport, or they hold the mistaken belief that they actually have a career.

I have a question - do you regard giving lessons on Skype a prosperous career?
OP dudelz  2 | 7  
6 Nov 2011 /  #3
I'm glad the satirical nature of this topic was not lost on you. In answer to your probing question, teaching in general, whether it's on Skype or in the real world, is not prosperous and that is one of the underlying messages here. Private schools in Poland can be ruthless and that's good advice to anyone considering a teaching job here.
dtaylor5632  18 | 1998  
6 Nov 2011 /  #4
Private schools in Poland can be ruthless and that's good advice to anyone considering a teaching job here.

Some are, some aren't. Now where's Seanus? That was really for him to say.
Knee Grow  
6 Nov 2011 /  #5
I have a question - do you regard giving lessons on Skype a prosperous career?

Beleive it or not most and I mean most NS are unsuccessfull in there own countries and do think they have a career,and a cheap temporary high life attracts them,which they cant even dream in there own country......and if they were real english teachers why cant they get good job in professional universities or related field.In my opinion they are back packers looking for expense money to live and some who have been doing for a long time and also have made this a career,we have lots of folks here who are in this forum here:)
ukpolska  
6 Nov 2011 /  #6
Thank god I am not a teacher then :0)

I do find these comments rather sweeping as I myself got out of teaching seven years ago to something better.
However, I also know many natives who have been here ten years plus and left very successful jobs in the UK to live with their Polish spouse and have carried on that success in Poland to live and provide a very comfortable life for their family. Some would say love blinds reason as who in their right mind would consider moving to Poland? <--- I have to keep pinching myself on that even after 14 years. :0)
delphiandomine  86 | 17823  
6 Nov 2011 /  #7
and if they were real english teachers why cant they get good job in professional universities or related field.

If you actually knew a damned thing about Poland, you'd know that university life is poorly paid in Poland and you can earn far more elsewhere.

who in their right mind would consider moving to Poland?

I dunno, for me, living here has lots of advantages. I can drive to Croatia on holiday, I can visit Berlin whenever I want (without having to live there), I can visit other places, you can do everything here (ski, sail, etc) - hard not to like. Sure, I could move to Switzerland and earn an insane amount of money per hour (100CHF being perfectly normal) as a teacher, but ... I can't imagine living with all the Swiss rules and customs.

As for the weather, no rain for 3 weeks, what's not to like?
ukpolska  
6 Nov 2011 /  #8
I dunno, for me, living here has lots of advantages.

I didn't phrase that too well as what I meant that if you had told me 14 years ago that I would be living and working in Poland I would have said you were mad - you never know what is round the corner in life :0)
OP dudelz  2 | 7  
6 Nov 2011 /  #9
you never know what is round the corner in life

I agree. Sometimes you have to just go with the flow - the flow being in the river Oder.
PWEI  3 | 612  
6 Nov 2011 /  #10
If you actually knew a damned thing about Poland, you'd know that university life is poorly paid in Poland and you can earn far more elsewhere.

Something which I can personally attest to.
Seanus  15 | 19666  
6 Nov 2011 /  #11
Dudelz knows my style very well, dt, so I let sb else in to coin my pet phrase. He is a really composed chap and a patient teacher. I expected nothing short of what the OP contains. It is true that schools have run into 'transitional' teachers who are on the rebound from sth else. However, schools have to play the very game which they themselves got themselves into. They want to cream the profits but, as in all businesses, there is an element of risk. They often end up with teachers that are between things and, well, with all manner of other issues like stinkiness, vanity and downright unprofessionalism. Bosses can't expect an easy ride and I'm glad a certain Zbig, a fellow dudelz knows, was put through his paces. They chose to make teaching a big business so they must accept the rollercoaster ride. My dad and I really take a firm line against the business element of it and we believe in the purity of the teaching ethic.

So, well done dudelz in being light-hearted and satirical. You are truly a testament to old, valued British notions and wit :)
teflcat  5 | 1024  
6 Nov 2011 /  #12
Others stay longer, either because they are in relationships or they have lost their passport, or they hold the mistaken belief that they actually have a career.

Why do you feel that it's impossible to make a career in teaching here?

if they were real english teachers why cant they get good job in professional universities

It's not easy to get a uni job in Poland for various reasons. People help people they know, if you know what I mean. I freelanced for six years in the same uni before getting a staff post there.
Seanus  15 | 19666  
6 Nov 2011 /  #13
He didn't say it was impossible to be fair. He likely knows that things can change at the drop of a hat. You have to put yourself places and that's just a fact!

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