PF - The Omnibus Edition

The empire is waning. There are troublesome tribes in the far east of my domain. Taxes are not being collected. Most importantly, the expenses budget has all but dried up.....

All yours mate;)

Grin, I will set up a annual service in your memory, the memory of Charlotte the Great, the brave PolarBear who dared to stand up in the face of tyranny against overwhelming odds and founded this honorable thread.

>^..^<

M-G (and we will call it Charlotte-Day, 16 November)

Overpriced swill. Tim Horton's, A legendary Canadian Coffee chain, has wonderful, unpretentious coffee.

You really should try it if you get a chance.

if I get a chance. The question is: do I really want to. You should try coffee misto and you will NEVER go back. Promise;) mniam....mniam......

I tried Starbucks once. I never went back.

;-)

all right, all right. Why can people just drink what they like?

Guinness for me please! If not, Zywiec, prosze.

where is Szar, I need some entertainment, please.

Name that loon….

Now that the dark clouds of anonymity have descended upon us and we are now just a name without a visual reminder, it’s high time we had some other way of associating some sort of character to those oh so boring handles. Therefore I have retreated to an old trick I once started on here. It got me into trouble with Ranj when I did it the first time but what the hell, I’ll live on the wild side just one more time before I die. Yes it’s back.

If posters were albums what would they be?

I’ll start. How about

Seanus – Definitely, maybe – Oasis
SeanBM – Is this it? – The Strokes
Wroclaw Boy – Bat out of Hell – Meatloaf
Southern – Are you Experienced? – Jimi Hendrix
Mrs Szarlotka – My Aim is True – Elvis Costello

You have to choose five more where the title fits the poster (or not as maybe). Most original entry submitted before Christmas (in the opinion of an independent jury down at my local) wins our endearing gratitude and a bottle of something nice.

Here's my two bits:

Charlotte: Napoleon XIV - They're Coming to Take Me Away Ha-Haaa!
Sokrates: Exploited - Troops of tomorrow
aphrodisiac: Berlin - Pleasure Victim
MareGaea: Joy Division - Unknown Pleasures
Lesser: Elvis Presley - Songs the Lord thaught me

>^..^<

M-G (is getting a bit sick - slight flu or sth)

The True Story Of Grass in Poland

I'm gonna start a new thread. It's called "What type of grass is currently popular in Poland". I'm starting this because I want to go live in Poland and I am afraid if I take a certain type of grass which is not popular at the moment in PL, I will be looked down upon by my neighbours. Of course, I could go to a shop that sells grass-seed, but I am very insecure and I am afraid that the shopassistant will laugh at me when I ask what grass is popular right now. That brings me as well to another question: what's exactly the role of the Jews? Why do they indoctrinate the poor and abused Poles into buying a certain type of grass? Must be the first step to world domination there. You would say that they didn't have time to indoctrinate the Poles into buying a certain type of grass, as they're busy killing Palestinians, Ukrainians and perverting and destroying the good, noble and above all humble Christian values. I know they do this, because Joepilsudki has found proof on the website of the esteemed scientist, who chooses to create a website called ihatejews.org as an outlet for his information, which is so hot that nobody wants to believe it. Or better: he's been muffled away by Zionists who don't want the world to know the truth about Jews who traffick poor and helpless Russian women. These women think they are getting a good and decent income as a prostitute, yet they end up being a shopassistent, selling Jew-manufactured grass. Cheehaw agrees to this because she has proof that all Jews are in fact Turks that first went under the name of Khazars and from somewhere in Central Asia infiltrated Eastern Europe and as they were doing so, they brought along the seed of the grass the Poles are forced to buy by Zionists.

Then there is the question of what house that garden will belong to. Since I have never heard of real estate agents and i for certainly know that there are no real estate agents in Poland, I go on this forum to ask the experts here how much houses in Poland cost. But then I get insecure again, because Bolek says that foreigners should not buy Polish houses and Sokrates agrees with this: Polish houses were standing there before WW2 and Polish houses should only be owned by Polish ppl who have lived in Poland for at least 2000 years. And if you don't agree to this, you're simply a little piece of human trash. And I'm not sure if I can trace back my Polish roots for such a long time. So I'm not sure, once again.

Then I am planning to get a Polish girl. Since I learned on this forum that Polish girls are actually aliens from a different planet, I am not sure how to approach one. I think, reading this forum, that I have to bring 150 roses and 5 kilogrammes of chocolate, talk about cultural things all the time, have to like dancing, drink loads of booze and not try to kiss her until the 15th date. Of course I have to make sure my CC is filled to the max because I will have to pay for each and everything she does. At least, that is what I learned on this forum.

In the meantime, Seanus will try to approach Joepilsudki and cheehaw to try to get them give proof of the metaphysical connection between grass, Zionism, mass killings and the desire to rule the world. Joe and cheehaw fall short in this respect, but they have found another website: fuckthejews.org.za, which says that it's true that the Jews through the selling of grass try to conquer the world, starting with Poland. They base this on statements by a certain A. Hilter, an Austrian scientist who did extensive research on the Jews, Jewishness and Zionism for the last 80 years and claims to have found a solution for this. They show YouTube videos with some black and white footage of dead ppl, which hold a cardboard sign in their dead hands that has written on it: "I am a poor Ukrainian and the guy laying beside me is a poor Pole and we both got murdered by Jewish Bolshevics, in fact, we all got killed by Jews. We always have been killed by Jews. It all started when I bought this Jewish impregnated grass." Nobody notices that the cardboard is brown and the text is written in English and with red and green markers.

Then everybody goes to drink Coffee and all is well for a while.

<to be continued>

>^..^<

M-G (part 1)

hey, nobody said that PF has a lot of objective posters:)

I will never ask Szar to write anything if he is in a non-creative mood. I will wait until the muse will strike him. Lesson learnt:)

aphrodisiac

I think I am just as capable of writing a funny story as Charlotte is. Charlotte is indulging his beerbelly in some hot, sub-tropical sun seeking inspiration (enter Viagra) as I understand it. Tomorrow part 2 of the True Story Of Grass (or how the Jews try to dominate the Home and Gardening Depots market as a means to control the world).

>^..^<

M-G (some men are closer to apes than other men, while other men are closer to PolarBears than other men who are closer to reptiles)

I would never try to compete with Mr Szar - the is Da one. Besides, English is not my first language, so why would I even try.


ata man. Well deserved:).


Who said you did not? ;). Looking forward to reading part 2;)

It isn't mine either. But yet I think I do pretty well.

And besides, Charlotte handed me the scepter some time ago. He recognizes true competition.

Tomorrow or Wednesday there will be a part 2. Depends a bit on how busy I am tomorrow - had a long weekend again and work tends to pile up if I do, I know from experience :S

I hope to complete 6 or 7 parts in total. Depends on the time and inspiration or if I after a few parts still feel like continuing. You will be in it too, don't know how and when, but you will :)

>^..^<

M-G (ahem)

yes.


he did? When? I must have missed that.


Take your time, after all it is about quality as well.


Oh, NO!!!!!!!!!!

MINI - OMNIBUS ***

It looks like the post has been deserted by Szar again. Now I know he has a pattern. I am probably the last one to notice.

***

MG's writing career on PF was a false alarm

MG has produced one part of Omnibus and promised another one. So far we have not heard from him. I think he is NOT coming back anymore because he found out that writing is work and since he is not getting paid, he is not going to bother. It is a pity because he was easy target to tease and now I have to find another "victim".

DTaylor resurfaces

Our Scottish friend "beammed" or "transported" himself to Ireland all the way from Krakow. He either likes challenges or did something in Krakow and he is NOT telling us about it. Some kind of Polish brigade had something to do with his departure, or he simply dated all the available women in Krakow and the supply has dried up. We will never know. He is not telling us. I am sure that speculation is much more interesting then the truth.

What is new.

Not much. Lodz is creating more redundant threads - the latest one is about tigers and I don't even want to ask him what is coming next.

PF women have matured (or getting more attention outside of the forum)

Wyspi has grown up and matured and does not call people names, unless she does and I don't read all her posts.
Justysia has calmed down too. In general, most women on PF have calmed down. It must be due to a smaller amount of annoying males who used to frequent this forum. Who knows. It is also possible that they just run out of steam. Not the women. The mucho-psychos.

Love is in the air again

Wildrover has found another Russian beauty but for some reason wants to meet her in the Ukraine. I guess Ukraine is the new love destination, since Paris and Venice have become things of the past. What about Petersburg or Mongolia?

Undeserved suspention

Southern FINALLY got suspended and we all know that if someone gets suspended on PF - it takes approximately 3 years or so. In other foras - it takes ONE word, or else - and they are NOT kidding. On the serious note about Southern: he reminds me of a person who has only one thing in his mind and we all know how Marquis de Sade ended up. Be careful young boy- the whole life is ahead of you and it is up to you if you want to be in, or out.

I know he is not going to listen but I had my pep talk

"One fly over the cuckoo nest" aka looney tunes on PF

It a a looney bin most of the time, but sometime we get lucky. Sometimes a non-suspecting intelligent poster decides to join the forum and it does not take him a long time to realize that this forum is indeed a scene out of the "One fly over the cuckoo nest". We are all here by mistake and the "nurses" and "doctors" are the ones who are crazy. Only we had enough instinct to find this island of sanity in the crazy world of cyber space. How smart and self -preserving we are.

Ksysia

every time I see her nick, I want to say Krysia because Ksysia feels rather strange for the Polish speaker. When I say Ksysia, I feel that suddenly I have regressed to times in the kindergarden, when I could only say Ksysia after I lost a tooth in the fight in the sand. Good old times and takes Ksysia (shrug) for bringing them back.

spot on

oh, so now I can edit:
should be One Flew over the .....


should be: fight in the sand box. ....and thanks Ksysia......


it must be it:)

well everything always equals out in the end :):):):)

So if (some) women become emotional it's still men's fault? Guess we just have to treat women like children then since (some) constantly complaining women prefer to exult in their many privileges while men continue to have the responsibilities. ...well, at least in western cultures.


I believe that dictate has been shortened to a mere 1,500 years. By the way, that was a somewhat 'odd' post and all that talking about grass etc. What were you smoking? :)

move to pakistan and beat up your wife everyday if she becomes emotional


it can be SOME men's fault, and it seems that the better they know how annoying they are, the more they do it. aren't you guys more like children? i've never seen a woman almost cry with pity for herself when she had a cold :).

Don't have a beerbelly.

Can't afford Viagra.

Inspiration has always eluded me

Not true. M-G just has been very busy lately at work, and since that is producing my flow of income it's only natural that this has a somewhat higher priority than writing in the PF omnibus at the moment. Don't worry, I will be back. You always have to wait the longest for the best things.


Maybe because they found out that not the entire universe revolves around them?


Prove it.


So no sex or only heavily frustrating sex for you?


Agree on that.

>^..^<

M-G (busy with the arrival of yet another team)

I couldn't agree with you more. ... and unfortunately it isn't just Pakistan. What surprises me is the relative silence of women's groups like "NOW" on this issue. They seem to put their priorities on bashing western men which compliments their socialist agenda.


Feminists believe it's always mens fault. Nevertheless, we are higher primates and with a little meditation and self-control, any person (man or woman) can control themselves within reason.


I suggest that this is a popular myth that women enjoy stating; unless of course they are referring to manginas. As to crying, is their any doubt that women cry more, much more frequently than men.....and for the most nonsensical reasons (movies, music, bad hair day etc).

you just repeated what I already have said. What is the point?


sounds like a generalization to me and there was a time when there were some annoying males posters who would come just to bash females on PF. So.......we have a different take on the same issue.


it is incredible that you always find a way to preach about your agenda Zimmy. I would agree with the statement you made, but unfortunately it has nothing to do with the "abusive" behavior some women experienced on PF. Is any abuse justified in your opinion?

I am pleased to announce that een second part of the Story of Grass is in the making. It already took some time and it will take some more, but pretty soon there will be one. Reason for this long period of waiting is twofold: 1) I am very busy with the arrival of a new team; and 2) I want to add as much subtlety as pssbl. I don't want to beat it into the reader with a sledgehammer, if you know what I mean. Subtle it should be, so it will take some extra time. This ends this announcement.

>^..^<

M-G (tiens)

Happy to see this is still going. Was always a highlight for me :)

It's got the gestation period of a friggin' elephant.... Expectations are higher by the minute...

In the meantime a merry Xmas to all of you

True!


Very True!


Merry Christmas to you too :)

22 months???? He must be working on Ulysses 2.

Ho, ho, ho, Merry X-mas to you Szartotka!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:)

Hehehehe! I'm keeping it to myself for now :P


I had this reputation back in Krakow and it was totally unfounded :/ All the available women just said no :( :D:D