Antek_Stalich 5 | 997
24 May 2011 / #31
But never ever wear shorts in church ;DDD
Yeah, and put your hat on before entering any Jewish place of cult. How could I forget ;-DDDD
Any particular Polish customs or traditions that I should know about in my relationship?
Yeah, and put your hat on before entering any Jewish place of cult. How could I forget ;-DDDD
Maaarysia
24 May 2011 / #32
How could I forget
You know the story of a certain Welsh guy, don't you? ;D
Wiedzmin_fan - | 79
24 May 2011 / #33
Do Poles celebrate Ivana Kupala (it's a big deal in Russia, Belarus and Ukraine)?
Yep, looks like it is the same holiday (according to Wikipedia). So do people go swimming, look for paporotnik flowers, jump over the fires, etc.?
Maaarysia
25 May 2011 / #34
Those customs you mention above are known in Poland but no one practice it nowadays. Too bad because it sounds really great.
re, "mother in law"
Simples really, a classic hand kiss on first meeting her. Lightly take the proffered hand,guide up slightly to her chest level,lower your head so she can see if you have a bald spot ( ;) ) then a quick peck on her hand while muttering a few well thought out compliments regarding her house/hair/daughter/dress etc and,Bingo, Mom in law is on side :)
Just dont try the heel click without plenty of practice or if wearing sneakers ;)
Simples really, a classic hand kiss on first meeting her. Lightly take the proffered hand,guide up slightly to her chest level,lower your head so she can see if you have a bald spot ( ;) ) then a quick peck on her hand while muttering a few well thought out compliments regarding her house/hair/daughter/dress etc and,Bingo, Mom in law is on side :)
Just dont try the heel click without plenty of practice or if wearing sneakers ;)
LaurenluvsRaf
1 Oct 2014 / #36
Merged: Dating a Polish man - Advice? Culture/customs/dating expectations in Poland
I'm sure everyone gets tired of reading all these personal stories on here. So I'm just going to skip all that and go right to the point.
I just started dating a guy from Poland. We've stumbled into a few miscommunications because of what seems to be cultural differences. Still I think he's really awesome, so I'd like to educate myself on the Polish culture/customs/dating expectations.
Sooooooo I'm open to all knowledge and advice on the matter.
And please, no one say, "Dating is dating. Nationality/ethnicity does not matter." Yeah I know. But culture matters. Please and thank you is the same in every country, but when and where you say it is different. Probably not the greatest example I know, but you get what I mean.
Thanks in advance for your help!
I'm sure everyone gets tired of reading all these personal stories on here. So I'm just going to skip all that and go right to the point.
I just started dating a guy from Poland. We've stumbled into a few miscommunications because of what seems to be cultural differences. Still I think he's really awesome, so I'd like to educate myself on the Polish culture/customs/dating expectations.
Sooooooo I'm open to all knowledge and advice on the matter.
And please, no one say, "Dating is dating. Nationality/ethnicity does not matter." Yeah I know. But culture matters. Please and thank you is the same in every country, but when and where you say it is different. Probably not the greatest example I know, but you get what I mean.
Thanks in advance for your help!
Mehs
1 Oct 2014 / #37
'cultural differences' - what do you mean? Language barriers or something more.
LaurenluvsRaf
1 Oct 2014 / #38
'cultural differences' - what do you mean? Language barriers or something more.
Hmm, not too many problems with language. His English is much better than my polish, haha. We fare pretty well with that.
Communication styles are different though. He is extremely bold, it almost is shocking sometimes what he will say to me. Not that it's necessarily negative, but still. Wow. But if I am equally as bold he sometimes becomes confused, offended or upset.
He does not like me having male friends. Or well, I can have as many male friends as I want I just cannot do anything with them ever or talk to them.
He has insisted many times I change my job as a waitress. He offers no explanation. It's a temporary job to pay for school, so I'm keeping it for now. But it really seems to bother him? I think something about me serving others?
He despises public displays of affection. Rather, when I initiate public displays of affection. He will play in my hair, hold my hand, massage my neck, etc. whenever he feels like it. But if I go to kiss him on the cheek.....no no no. Not in public.
He likes me to get really dolled up when we go out. I mean, I like to do this anyway. But if we are just going to grab a pizza to go and rent movies to watch at home he wants me to look like we are going out to dinner and a movie. He loves when I wear his t-shirt and boxers, leave my hair down and wear no makeup when we are in the house. But if he is going to be seen with me in public, he expects me to look like I just walked off the runway.
These are just a few. I've been going with the flow since I like him so well. And maybe they aren't cultural after all? I have no idea. That's why I'm asking. I just want to have a better understanding, I really dig this guy.
Thanks!
Hmm, not too many problems with language. His English is much better than my polish, haha. We fare pretty well with that.
Communication styles are different though. He is extremely bold, it almost is shocking sometimes what he will say to me. Not that it's necessarily negative, but still. Wow. But if I am equally as bold he sometimes becomes confused, offended or upset.
He does not like me having male friends. Or well, I can have as many male friends as I want I just cannot do anything with them ever or talk to them.
He has insisted many times I change my job as a waitress. He offers no explanation. It's a temporary job to pay for school, so I'm keeping it for now. But it really seems to bother him? I think something about me serving others?
He despises public displays of affection. Rather, when I initiate public displays of affection. He will play in my hair, hold my hand, massage my neck, etc. whenever he feels like it. But if I go to kiss him on the cheek.....no no no. Not in public.
He likes me to get really dolled up when we go out. I mean, I like to do this anyway. But if we are just going to grab a pizza to go and rent movies to watch at home he wants me to look like we are going out to dinner and a movie. He loves when I wear his t-shirt and boxers, leave my hair down and wear no makeup when we are in the house. But if he is going to be seen with me in public, he expects me to look like I just walked off the runway.
These are just a few. I've been going with the flow since I like him so well. And maybe they aren't cultural after all? I have no idea. That's why I'm asking. I just want to have a better understanding, I really dig this guy.
Thanks!
Mehs
1 Oct 2014 / #39
I think something about me serving others?
No.. he's just afraid to lose you to other men. He (probably rightfully) thinks American girls are sort of easygoing when dating many guys is concerned and he just doesn't want that (who would). Having girlfriends could be related to that too. It seems he's taking the relationship more seriously than you do and being 'bold' could be to show you that his feelings are real.
On the other hand, him not liking to kiss you in public is contradictory to what I wrote above. But looking like a 'trophy' is sort of a Polish (or Europe) thing - girls/boys in Poland care more about wearing good/brand stuff than in the US. So if you are in Poland you may need to get used to looking good in public ;).
To sum up.. he's probably thinking long-term and you're thinking short or medium term. It's for you and him to decide what's best to both of you ;).
PC_Sceptic - | 69
1 Oct 2014 / #40
He does not like me having male friends. Or well, I can have as many male friends as I want I just cannot do anything with them ever or talk to them
First he is jealous. Second insecure, which one goes hand with hand with the other.
Not only Poles are like that,
Anyhow he doesn't understand the concept of trust.
Teach him. (if you care a lot about him)
LaurenluvsRaf
5 Oct 2014 / #41
Merged: Is it cultural or something else?
I just started dating a guy from Warsaw, Poland. He's the best, I really like him. But recently we have had some misunderstandings about expectations and things. Nothing serious. And I tend to go along with whatever he insists since I like him so well, but I'm just curious to know if these misunderstandings are stemming from cultural differences perhaps?
I posted on here last week (??? Or whenever) but I was pretty vague. I thought specifics might give you a better understanding of the situation at hand. I've been reading through the forums, it's a really cool site. I feel like I've learned a lot, but not quite what I'm looking for. I could use any knowledge/advice you have!
His English is much better than my polish, haha. We fare pretty well with that. The misunderstandings are very rarely due to language.
Communication styles are different though. He is extremely bold, it almost is shocking sometimes what he will say to me. Not that it's necessarily negative, but still. Wow. But if I am equally as bold he sometimes becomes confused, offended or upset.
He does not like me having male friends. Or well, I can have as many male friends as I want I just cannot do anything with them ever or talk to them. But he has a handful of female friends that he is actually kind of close to it seems. I don't mind, he treats them like sisters. It's kind of sweet. But uh....double standard much?
He has insisted many times I change my job as a waitress. He offers no explanation. It's a temporary job to pay for school, so I'm keeping it for now. But it really seems to bother him?
He despises public displays of affection. Rather, when I am the one initiating public displays of affection. He will play in my hair, hold my hand, massage my neck, etc. whenever he feels like it in public, and in front of whoever. But if I go to kiss him on the cheek.....no no no. Not in public.
He likes me to get really dolled up when we go out. I mean, I like to do this anyway. But if we are just going to grab a pizza to-go and rent movies to watch at home he wants me to look like we are actually going out to dinner and a movie. He loves when I wear his t-shirt and boxers, leave my hair down and wear no makeup when we are in the house. But if he is going to be seen with me in public, he expects me to look like I just walked off the runway.
These are just a few. I've been going with the flow since I really. And maybe they aren't cultural after all? I have no idea. That's why I'm asking. I just want to have a better understanding, I really dig this guy.
Thanks!
I just started dating a guy from Warsaw, Poland. He's the best, I really like him. But recently we have had some misunderstandings about expectations and things. Nothing serious. And I tend to go along with whatever he insists since I like him so well, but I'm just curious to know if these misunderstandings are stemming from cultural differences perhaps?
I posted on here last week (??? Or whenever) but I was pretty vague. I thought specifics might give you a better understanding of the situation at hand. I've been reading through the forums, it's a really cool site. I feel like I've learned a lot, but not quite what I'm looking for. I could use any knowledge/advice you have!
His English is much better than my polish, haha. We fare pretty well with that. The misunderstandings are very rarely due to language.
Communication styles are different though. He is extremely bold, it almost is shocking sometimes what he will say to me. Not that it's necessarily negative, but still. Wow. But if I am equally as bold he sometimes becomes confused, offended or upset.
He does not like me having male friends. Or well, I can have as many male friends as I want I just cannot do anything with them ever or talk to them. But he has a handful of female friends that he is actually kind of close to it seems. I don't mind, he treats them like sisters. It's kind of sweet. But uh....double standard much?
He has insisted many times I change my job as a waitress. He offers no explanation. It's a temporary job to pay for school, so I'm keeping it for now. But it really seems to bother him?
He despises public displays of affection. Rather, when I am the one initiating public displays of affection. He will play in my hair, hold my hand, massage my neck, etc. whenever he feels like it in public, and in front of whoever. But if I go to kiss him on the cheek.....no no no. Not in public.
He likes me to get really dolled up when we go out. I mean, I like to do this anyway. But if we are just going to grab a pizza to-go and rent movies to watch at home he wants me to look like we are actually going out to dinner and a movie. He loves when I wear his t-shirt and boxers, leave my hair down and wear no makeup when we are in the house. But if he is going to be seen with me in public, he expects me to look like I just walked off the runway.
These are just a few. I've been going with the flow since I really. And maybe they aren't cultural after all? I have no idea. That's why I'm asking. I just want to have a better understanding, I really dig this guy.
Thanks!
slonce5
15 Dec 2014 / #42
Can you give me examples of his bold statements. he act he does not want you to work as a waitress i is not a cultural thing. He is probably jealous.
Many men in Poland are affectionate in public but some are not / I do not think that this is a cultural thing.
Polish women like to be dolled up all the time, so he may got used to it when he lived in Poland,
Many men in Poland are affectionate in public but some are not / I do not think that this is a cultural thing.
Polish women like to be dolled up all the time, so he may got used to it when he lived in Poland,
There is another consideration to be taken into account.
He sees you as 'eye candy' and nothing more. If you think that I'm actually wrong - ask him if he would ever marry you.
Don't waste your time with this guy.
If someone wants the following: change the way you look, change or limit your friends, change your job - ask yourself whether it is actually YOU (as a person that you are now) that he wants or is it someone else.You will never be 'good enough' for him.
He sees you as 'eye candy' and nothing more. If you think that I'm actually wrong - ask him if he would ever marry you.
Don't waste your time with this guy.
If someone wants the following: change the way you look, change or limit your friends, change your job - ask yourself whether it is actually YOU (as a person that you are now) that he wants or is it someone else.You will never be 'good enough' for him.
Merged: Some questions about Polish habits
Hello. I am from Poland, but I want to discuss some polish habits.
1. Do You think that polish people as an opposite to Spaniards etc don't touch others?
a) Man vs man - when a man touch polish man, he will think "wtf are u doing". Am I right?
b) When girl touch man during conversation or just want to hug - it's ok for man from Poland. He will be ok with it, but after he will not touch this girl, Am I right?
2. Why in Poland there is very poor dictionary about expressing feelings? When you love sb, you only say "Kocham cie". For ex. Spaniards has "Te quiero, de amo, te adoro, Estar enamorado:, etc".
3. What about polish sense of irony, sarcast? My friend asked me how to translate "Very funny". Proper translation for this is "Bardzo zabawne". But in my opinioin when somebody will say "Bardzo zabawne", his talking partner will think that he uses an irony.
What is ur point of view on these topics?
Hello. I am from Poland, but I want to discuss some polish habits.
1. Do You think that polish people as an opposite to Spaniards etc don't touch others?
a) Man vs man - when a man touch polish man, he will think "wtf are u doing". Am I right?
b) When girl touch man during conversation or just want to hug - it's ok for man from Poland. He will be ok with it, but after he will not touch this girl, Am I right?
2. Why in Poland there is very poor dictionary about expressing feelings? When you love sb, you only say "Kocham cie". For ex. Spaniards has "Te quiero, de amo, te adoro, Estar enamorado:, etc".
3. What about polish sense of irony, sarcast? My friend asked me how to translate "Very funny". Proper translation for this is "Bardzo zabawne". But in my opinioin when somebody will say "Bardzo zabawne", his talking partner will think that he uses an irony.
What is ur point of view on these topics?
don't touch others?
It is less likely - yes.
man touch polish man, he will think "wtf are u doing"
Probably, but it may depend on circumstances.
b)
Yes - a hug, a touch from a nice girl - why not, but touching back - maybe not so fast.
very poor dictionary about expressing feelings?
Ehhm - some other words exist like 'ubóstwiam Cię', 'miłuję' (this one is a bit outdated), but 'kocham' is the most universal and common.
"Bardzo zabawne", his talking partner will think that he uses an irony.
Yes - the best would be just a spontaneous laugh :)