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I want my Polish gf to live with me but she says life here is too hard


Dave76  2 | 6  
9 Jan 2010 /  #1
I'm madly in love with an amazing polish lady but in the two years we've been together things haven't always gone smoothly,she is now saying life here is too hard for her and she wants to return to Poland next month but I cant bear the thought of losing her,she is struggling for work can anyone give me any ideas how I can help her and convince her to stay.Please.
OP Dave76  2 | 6  
9 Jan 2010 /  #3
We met when she started in the electronics factory where I worked,but it closed down,since then she's been with an agency and they cant get her and permemant work,it's mostly factory stuff she's been doing.
Englishpoznan  4 | 99  
9 Jan 2010 /  #4
You know it's a crap time back home at the moment for work, and to be honest factory work is not going to make many people happy. have you considered moving to Poland with her?

What do you do for a living in the UK?
OP Dave76  2 | 6  
9 Jan 2010 /  #5
I'm a baker and I cant move,i have two children and i'd rather die than leave them,she knew when we first met that I had kids.i dont really know what to say,and I dont really know what anyone can do to help me,i guess at the end of the day it has to be her decision,but the thought of not being with her again tears me apart inside.She's the only woman I've ever actually fallen in love with.
Englishpoznan  4 | 99  
9 Jan 2010 /  #6
Sounds like you're in a tough situation mate, I met my misses in UK and she wanted to go back to Poland to finish her degree so I agreed to move with her and honestly it's been the best choice I ever made. Having kids though makes it hard i appreciate that.

All I can suggest is trying to find a decent job for her but like I said it's hard in the UK at the mo

Wish you the best of luck though
OP Dave76  2 | 6  
9 Jan 2010 /  #7
Thanx,i appreciate that.What is your wife studying?
Englishpoznan  4 | 99  
9 Jan 2010 /  #8
she has finished now, she was studying psychology we now have a business together. I have been here four years now and everything is pretty good.
delphiandomine  86 | 17823  
9 Jan 2010 /  #9
Hey, does she practice psychology at all?

I could do with a good English speaking psychologist for my file :)
Amathyst  19 | 2700  
9 Jan 2010 /  #10
All I can suggest is trying to find a decent job for her but like I said it's hard in the UK at the mo

Rocking horse and shite springs to mind!

Whilst I feel for the OP, this girl, if she loved you, would stay the distance...two years is quite a long time, just make her feel secure is all I can say, not a lot else you can do...or let her go home and see how the reality is and she'll be back in a week or so.
FredChopin  - | 61  
9 Jan 2010 /  #11
let her go home and see how the reality is and she'll be back in a week or so.

Excellent Advice. If you love someone, let them go. If they come back, they were always yours, if they don't, hunt them down and...

Can't remember the rest.
RonWest  3 | 120  
9 Jan 2010 /  #12
she has finished now, she was studying psychology we now have a business together. I have been here four years now and everything is pretty good

Just curious,
What type of business?
bolek  6 | 330  
9 Jan 2010 /  #13
[quote=Amathyst]or let her go home and see how the reality is and she'll be back in a week or so.

You have never been in love..hmmm true ...Poland is the place to be... you will find true love there.
Ogien  5 | 237  
19 Jan 2010 /  #14
I'm madly in love with an amazing polish lady but in the two years we've been together things haven't always gone smoothly,she is now saying life here is too hard for her and she wants to return to Poland next month but I cant bear the thought of losing her,she is struggling for work can anyone give me any ideas how I can help her and convince her to stay.Please.

If she wants to go back to Poland then let her. Don't force her to stay. If you really want to be with her then move to Poland with her.
bullfrog  6 | 602  
19 Jan 2010 /  #15
I'm a baker and I cant move,i have two children and i'd rather die than leave them,she knew when we first met that I had kids.

If you're a good baker, move with the whole family to Poland, bakers are in demand.. I know one of them (albeit french) who started his business a few months ago in Warsaw (Nowy swiat) and he is already doing a roaring trade..
jonni  16 | 2475  
19 Jan 2010 /  #16
know one of them (albeit french) who started his business a few months ago in Warsaw (Nowy swiat)

I know the shop you mean - it is excellent. There is a real market for artisan bakeries here and the startup costs don't have to be high.
bullfrog  6 | 602  
24 Jan 2010 /  #17
Went there this morning, as most weekends, to buy a couple of 'bagietka wiejska' and 4 croissant supreme.. A treat for breakfast!
SzwedwPolsce  11 | 1589  
24 Jan 2010 /  #18
Everything associate with economy is cyclic. Soon the economies will rise again, after that they will fall again... and so on.
pawian  221 | 25699  
17 Aug 2019 /  #19
how I can help her and convince her to stay.

Sometimes it is hopeless and a person can`t be convinced. Perhaps she isn`t happy with you, and "hard life here" is only an excuse to leave not only Britain but primarily you. Sorry. .
Rich Mazur  4 | 2894  
17 Aug 2019 /  #20
how I can help her and convince her to stay.Please.

Never, ever import a wife or try to convince this one to stay. The more you say "stay", the more she will like that mind game.

This case should conclude with: You want go? Then, go. I will miss you.
And shut up.
If you succeed, get her pregnant and she stays, for the rest of your life you will hear that you ruined hers. Not because that would be true. She would use it as a weapon during each and every argument.

Remember two things: (1) women fight dirty, and (2) they always lie.
pawian  221 | 25699  
18 Aug 2019 /  #21
for the rest of your life you will hear that you ruined hers..

Hmm, I wonder what else your wife tells you during your arguments. But sooner or later, you will tell us. :):)

(1) women fight dirty, and (2) they always lie.

It is a normal female strategy (due to biological reasons) and there is no need to make hallo about it. Men just need to get used to it.

BTW, males also lie like crazy, so it is not only a female busines.
Rich Mazur  4 | 2894  
18 Aug 2019 /  #22
Here is the difference. Men lie about how much they make or have. That is victimless fraud, easy to discover and walk away from.

Women lie about being raped or beaten. Multiple times over many years. Too stupid to realize that the longer the period, the weaker their case. Their victims have their lives ruined.

Huuuuuuge difference.
pawian  221 | 25699  
18 Aug 2019 /  #23
Women lie about being beaten.

Of course not. Battered wives or even celebrities are a real phenomenon, not stinking liars. Besides, there are usually witnesses - mostly children.
Rich Mazur  4 | 2894  
18 Aug 2019 /  #24
I am addicted to the crime reality shows so I know. After a woman finally admits to killing her guy, the very next sentence out of the bi&ch is always the same: He abused me. Did you call 911? No. I was too scared. Did you tell any of your friends? No, I was too ashamed. Did you take pictures of your bruises? No, I don't have a smartphone.

I made up the last one.

Besides, it takes only 100 bucks to be on a bus to the other end of the country and away from the bum.
How many more times would you let somebody beat you up before you would run for the door after the first time? How about zero?
gumishu  15 | 6193  
18 Aug 2019 /  #25
it takes only 100 bucks to be on a bus to the other end of the country and away from the bum.

maybe it takes just 100 bucks to go to the other coast of the US - but how much do you have to have to rent some place and start a new living - I think some women are not in a position to start from scratch in another part of the country (I'm talking also from my personal experience -well my mom's experience to be precise)

Please back on topic everyone
Wincig  2 | 225  
19 Aug 2019 /  #26
what topic?? the thread is 9 years old..
pawian  221 | 25699  
19 Aug 2019 /  #27
The simple logic says that even despite its age, this thread still possesses a topic. Won˛t you agree?
Or do you want to suggest that such problems no longer trouble people today? And people deal only with the issue of global warming, illegal immigrants and Kremlin trolls influencing democratic elections ?

She would use it as a weapon during each and every argument.

Better this than plates, mugs or other kitchen utensils. Not to mention a rolling pin. This image of a bad, pissed off wife armed with a rolling pin is an archetypal symbol in the Polish culture. There are thousands jokes about it.


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Rich Mazur  4 | 2894  
19 Aug 2019 /  #28
The reason why I like you, pawian, is because you are exactly what I am not: a nice and trusting gentleman. Almost charmingly naive. That was about you, not me. No, it was not a left-handed compliment. The world could not exist without your kind and would be hell with just mine.

Quoting from bbc.com:
Over the past 20 years, only 2-10% of rape accusations (Prof Ford's lawyer says she believes this was attempted rape) are proven to be fake, argue the authors of a 2010 US study.

and this:
Other studies have figures in the same range. The FBI has put the number of "unfounded" rapes - those determined to be false after investigation - at 8%.

Notice the words in italics: are proven and after investigation. These cases reached the level where a time-consuming investigation was conducted. It took money and many people to do it. And still produced that 8% rate of proven lies. BTW, would you like to be in that 8%?

Now, here is my point: if 8% are proven by investigations to be blatant lies - false sounds a lot nicer, doesn't it? - how many allegations were never investigated, but ruined men's reputations, careers, ability to earn money, drove them into depression and ultimately suicide? 16%? How about 32%

But that's not the worst of it. To the present crap that "women must always be believed", the feminazis demand and get full immunity from prosecution of the lying bi*ches. When was it last time a lying scum served time for lying to the police and everybody else?

When I hear this whiny crap how she was raped by her boyfriend for ten long years - no kids - my middle finger is the only response.
pawian  221 | 25699  
20 Aug 2019 /  #29
How many true rapes ruined women`s reputations, careers, ability to have a happy sex, ability to start a family, drove them into self-hating depression and ultimately suicide? Do you know the percentage of rapes that are not reported for fear and shame? 50%?

Sorry, 8% of male ruined careers is nothing compared to what most women suffer when a real rape takes place.
Crow  154 | 9489  
20 Aug 2019 /  #30
he is now saying life here is too hard for her and she wants to return to Poland next month

She is wise. She sees your country collapsing and wants back in safety and prosperity of Poland. I pity you. If you are sane, try to seduce her in any possible way and beg her to take you to Poland, too. That`s your only chance not to go mad.

Love her tenderly and tackle her on all places where she wants to be tackled. Don`t be hesitant.

Use tongue. Speak, I mean.

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