Myself
24 Aug 2016 / #1
Hi everybody,
I'm a young IT woman and here is my question: I have met this Pol guy I really like.
I got to know him when I started Joining my friend on A weekly event that became the "usual". He his a friend of my friend since long ago.
Around 40 days ago, the guy asked me whether I wanted to eat something together before the "usual" and the dinner happened to seem like a date. I was confused but it felt very nice to me. The week after he asked me whether I wanted to go with him somewhere out of town and I said yes. We spent 20 hours together and I was struck by discovering how many things we have in common.
I am out of a very abusive relationship ( but we NEVER talk about this matter luckly) and feeling scared of men. But not scared enough to hold back from life. Let's say I have a huge conflict within as I don't get if i can trust him or not and, on the other side, he is so respectful of me that sometimes it looks almost scared to touch my arm or back.
The week after (4 weeks ago) the thing got repeated. Meanwhile, our texting increased. But nothing happened although he brought me to the most amazing and romantic places . He showed a lot of nice thoughts towards me, but yet I felt and feel confused because I am used to men who are quite clear in their intentions. Usually, the guy I am used to are very adamant about lettin me know they like me. I don't get whether he does like this because he is a gentle person or because he might like me.
Sometimes we found ourselves holding each other's hand. But this just happens out of the blue when we come back home at night.
He holds the doors, pays compliments but I can't figure him out. Because someone can do this just out of kindness. He also pays everything and I m not used to it, as I have always been used to pay for my ex most part of the times, due to necessity. But maybe this is cultural?
Finally, around 3 weeks ago he kissed me, after we came back from the "usual". It was a super-shy kiss , but very nice. I can't place this kiss in the wider context. We didn't speak about it and he seemed "scared", although kept on texting me and so on . He is kinda introvert, I am a very shy person and I feel insecure. But usually people don't figure it out and think I am kinda superstrong and cool and independent woman. I am actually very fragile at times.
I feel scared and nothing is clear to me yet.
I am not good with texting and he writes in what I call "the usual polish way", which for an IT person feels like a telegram at times.
Few days later(2weeks ago) he went to his Country for a family wedding and I went to my Country too, for holidays. Through these days we texted a lot, but never spoken about precise matters. I feel a bit confused.
I am now coming back from holidays and I don't know what to expect. In other words, I am very scared... I really like him, as a man and as a person (or at least I like what I perceive of him) but I have suffered very much in the past in a very awful way. He doesn't know this.
I have been told that Polski men are "old fashion" at times and I wanted to know what do u readers think..
I know this post might seem confused, but so am I . I don't want to create embarassment in him but I am not good at expressing my interest sometimes. . . Especially in a written way, Because I dont feel textes as the best way to express my innermost.
Can't speak to my friend about this. I think she figured out but luckly gossip is not in her style.
And since I have never met a guy from this Country (only had flatmates from Poland) I would like to be enlightened about your culture around such matters.
Because seriously this is the first time I find myself in a situation like this...
I'm a young IT woman and here is my question: I have met this Pol guy I really like.
I got to know him when I started Joining my friend on A weekly event that became the "usual". He his a friend of my friend since long ago.
Around 40 days ago, the guy asked me whether I wanted to eat something together before the "usual" and the dinner happened to seem like a date. I was confused but it felt very nice to me. The week after he asked me whether I wanted to go with him somewhere out of town and I said yes. We spent 20 hours together and I was struck by discovering how many things we have in common.
I am out of a very abusive relationship ( but we NEVER talk about this matter luckly) and feeling scared of men. But not scared enough to hold back from life. Let's say I have a huge conflict within as I don't get if i can trust him or not and, on the other side, he is so respectful of me that sometimes it looks almost scared to touch my arm or back.
The week after (4 weeks ago) the thing got repeated. Meanwhile, our texting increased. But nothing happened although he brought me to the most amazing and romantic places . He showed a lot of nice thoughts towards me, but yet I felt and feel confused because I am used to men who are quite clear in their intentions. Usually, the guy I am used to are very adamant about lettin me know they like me. I don't get whether he does like this because he is a gentle person or because he might like me.
Sometimes we found ourselves holding each other's hand. But this just happens out of the blue when we come back home at night.
He holds the doors, pays compliments but I can't figure him out. Because someone can do this just out of kindness. He also pays everything and I m not used to it, as I have always been used to pay for my ex most part of the times, due to necessity. But maybe this is cultural?
Finally, around 3 weeks ago he kissed me, after we came back from the "usual". It was a super-shy kiss , but very nice. I can't place this kiss in the wider context. We didn't speak about it and he seemed "scared", although kept on texting me and so on . He is kinda introvert, I am a very shy person and I feel insecure. But usually people don't figure it out and think I am kinda superstrong and cool and independent woman. I am actually very fragile at times.
I feel scared and nothing is clear to me yet.
I am not good with texting and he writes in what I call "the usual polish way", which for an IT person feels like a telegram at times.
Few days later(2weeks ago) he went to his Country for a family wedding and I went to my Country too, for holidays. Through these days we texted a lot, but never spoken about precise matters. I feel a bit confused.
I am now coming back from holidays and I don't know what to expect. In other words, I am very scared... I really like him, as a man and as a person (or at least I like what I perceive of him) but I have suffered very much in the past in a very awful way. He doesn't know this.
I have been told that Polski men are "old fashion" at times and I wanted to know what do u readers think..
I know this post might seem confused, but so am I . I don't want to create embarassment in him but I am not good at expressing my interest sometimes. . . Especially in a written way, Because I dont feel textes as the best way to express my innermost.
Can't speak to my friend about this. I think she figured out but luckly gossip is not in her style.
And since I have never met a guy from this Country (only had flatmates from Poland) I would like to be enlightened about your culture around such matters.
Because seriously this is the first time I find myself in a situation like this...